Atrox melior dulcissima veritas mendaciis.
"Lena," her voice breaks with the weight of the word. "Don't do this, this isn't you." Supergirl was pleading with her-begging her.
"Do not presume you know anything regarding who I am." She spat, directing the venom she felt towards her mother at the hero. Her eyes slid shut, imagining her vile face in place of Supergirl's perfection. She had to. She couldn't say these words to that face...the one she thinks was crafted by the gods themselves.
"You are mistaken if you believe this...thing between us was borne from anything more than my desire to have a Super beneath hold power over you when you think you have power over all humans (a line from her mother, it felt awful rolling off her tongue) "I must say, you were a surprisingly good fuck for someone certainly so lacking in experience. That's all this was for me, after all. A conquest, which, I might add, I've won. So please get the hell out of here and I don't want to see you back." A cold smile flashes across her face, but she is chewing the inside of her cheek so hard she can taste the metallic blood swirling at the back of her mouth.
She opens her eyes then, needing to see the look on Supergirl's face-knowing she deserves it. She deserves to be haunted by what she had done and more. The blonde's head hangs low, defeated, her usual confidence entirely disintegrated. She raises her hand up near her eyes as if to adjust something, but slowly removes it when she recognizes there is nothing there to fix, her hand balling into a fist and dropping to her side.
It was just an innocuous movement, but it spoke volumes to Lena. Her mother, of course, wanted her to find out the false human identity of the false god but Lena had refrained. Had done everything in her power to be sure Supergirl wouldn't tell her despite their budding romance. She couldn't do much to prevent this plan, but she could protect Supergirl in this way despite the repercussions it caused her. She didn't think about who Supergirl was outside of their time together, she couldn't, she wouldn't. She purposefully tried to separate the two entities. She couldn't now, not with that simple hand gesture. "Kara…" she breathes out.
Suddenly she is bombarded by flashbacks of her time with the sunny Catco reporter-her only friend in this city. Actually, her only friend at all, if she was being honest with herself. How could she be so blind as to not see this before? Now this plot of her mother's would cause her to lose the woman she loved (because yes, she did indeed fall in love with Supergirl despite her best efforts) and the only person she ever fully trusted. How could Kara hide this from her? It was her own damn fault, she realizes, she'd told Supergirl she didn't want to know her identity despite the fact she knew the secret was weighing on the hero. It would also explain her somewhat strained relationship with Kara this past month. She heaves a heavy sigh, knowing this new information, despite how it crushes her down like Atlas under the weight of the world, could not change her course of action. She must persevere. She must, and then she must figure out a way to undo the whole thing before it does any real damage to Kara...to Supergirl. The damage to her was already done.
"Lena" she takes another step forward, cupping Lena's cheek with the palm of her right hand because she knows it always anchored Lena, always made her feel safe. Without thinking, Lena's hand rises up to clutch Supergirl's forearm as it always did. For a moment she feels anchored and steady and Lena leans into it against her better judgment. Realizing what she's done, she sucks her bottom lip into her mouth and bites down nearly had enough to break the fragile skin there. This would be the last time she felt Kara's warm skin against hers, she was loath to move it. Lena's palm feels unusually cold against Supergirl's warm hand as she removes it from her cheek as hastily as she can manage.
"I will tell you one more time, Supergirl. You were just a conquest, and the conquest has been won. Now get the hell out before I call security."
She tries to steady her hand at her side, the feeling of Supergirl's warmth still upon it's trembling facade. Images of Supergirl beneath her merely an hour ago threaten to overwhelm her. That hand had never left the hero's as she made love to her, tasted every inch of her skin and watched as planets exploded underneath her eyelids as she came under the ministrations of the hero's tongue.
She shook her head, willing the images to flee. Willing Supergirl to flee. When she looked up again, Supergirl had passed her and was standing at the door to her balcony.
"This isn't you, Lena." It was delivered on a soft broken whisper. Her name sounded like an unheard prayer in Supergirl's melodic voice that was gravelly and destroyed by the gravity of their situation. When Lena turned to look at her, tears were streaming down Supergirl's usually stoically brave face. The image sears itself into her mind and she is not sure she will ever be able to forget it. She wasn't worthy of forgetting the hurt she caused, anyhow.
"This is exactly who I am." It was barely above a whisper, there is no conviction in her words and she knows it.
Supergirl flies away and Lena succumbs to the agony within her with a sob, sinking to her knees as she buries her face in her hands keeping it there for as long as she dares and willing the tears to stop springing from her eyes even though she knows they will not cease.
With shaky hands, she grabs her phone and reports to her mother. Three words are all she can manage and even at that she has to retype every single one of them several times. No longer is she able to control the tremble that has started in her hands and has now flooded the entirety of her being.
"It is done."
The bitter truth is better than the sweetest lies.