A Thousand Times More
Miley swung her legs out of bed, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes as she turned the lamp on her bedside table on. She had heard a noise, like someone was breaking into the house, and she was desperately hoping that it had just been a dream. Then she heard it again. Jolting awake, she stood up quickly, opening the drawer in her bedside table and taking out the pepper spray she always kept there. Walking slowly to her bedroom door, she peered into the hall and jumped as she heard the sound coming from her old bedroom.
She reached for the door handle, slowly turning it with one hand while keeping a firm grip on the pepper spray in the other. Throwing the door open quickly, she flicked the light switch on and braced herself to meet the person breaking into her house. It was then that she saw the blonde hair and the startling blue eyes.
Lillian Truscott.
Her hand holding the pepper spray automatically dropped to her side as she stumbled back, leaning against the doorframe for support. It had been four years since she had last seen Lilly. Four years of agonizing, excruciating, heartbreaking pain. It had almost been unbearable.
"Look, I know that this looks horrible, but I'm seriously not trying to break into your house, okay?" she said, holding her hands up in the universal gesture for innocence. "I just wanted to see you, but you'd changed your phone number and when I called your dad, he said that he'd moved out to Tennessee to help your grandma and that you were living here. You didn't come to the door and I…"
The brunette tuned Lilly's rambling out, her eyes sweeping over the blonde. It looked like she was well off. She had some nice clothes on, or they would have been nice before she climbed up the tree and jumped onto her balcony. Her slacks were scratched up and her jacket had dirt all over, and she wasn't wearing sneakers? What had happened to Lilly? Then Miley's eyes swept over Lilly's face and really looked at it for the first time. She sucked in a breath in surprise.
That was when Lilly looked away, obviously embarrassed. Four years ago, Lilly had been caught in her burning house. Miley had been over and something had caught fire. She had dragged Miley out of the house and gone back in to get her mom. Miley had tried going after, but a fireman grabbed her from behind, pulling her back, keeping her from following Lilly. They had carried the blonde away on a stretcher and that was the last time she had seen her.
"Don't look at me like that," Lilly whispered, her voice breaking, and Miley could tell that she was crying.
Miley stepped forward, taking Lilly in her arms and holding her tightly. Lilly started to cry, leaning her head on Miley's shoulder and collapsing into her. The brunette just held her, hurting for the girl who had been hurt so long ago, who was still hurting. She murmured quietly in her ear, trying to calm her down.
"I'm ugly," Lilly sobbed.
"No, no, don't say that," Miley whispered, pulling away from her and looking her in the eyes. "You're the most beautiful person I've ever met in my life."
"Don't lie to me."
"Lilly, I want you to tell me if it looks like I'm lying to you," Miley said, and Lilly looked up at her just as Miley leaned forward, capturing the blonde's lip in a kiss. She pulled Lilly closer to her, their bodies fitting together like they had been made for one another. After a moment, Miley pulled away, looking at Lilly uncertainly. "Do you believe me?" she whispered.
"All this time…" Lilly said softly, touching her lips with her fingers.
"I don't love you any less," Miley whispered. "This whole time, I've been trying to get in touch with you, but everything got lost when I moved to New York to go to Juilliard. My dad insisted that I buy my own cell phone, so I lost everything on my old one and you had just changed your number. I just got back into Malibu last week and I've been busy with working out my schedule with the producers…"
"Wait, you still went to Juilliard, even after what happened?" Lilly asked.
"Yeah, my dad didn't let me back out," Miley said. "The counselors made it clear that it was a once in a lifetime offer and that if I didn't go, then I wouldn't be accepted if I reapplied the next year, no matter what the situation. Believe me, I called them, I scheduled an appointment with them, I even had my dad talk to them. They wouldn't budge. I'm so sorry for leaving you."
"And you…you did well at Juilliard?" Lilly asked carefully. "You made friends and…"
"No, Lilly, no one could ever replace you, I promise," Miley said, running her fingers over Lilly's cheeks. The blonde flinched as the brunette's fingers ran over scarred flesh, her eyes fluttering closed as Miley gently kissed away tears. "Lilly, you're my soul, my life, my everything, and I could never, ever live with anyone except you. I've waited for you this whole time and…and I want to know if you waited for me."
"Do you really have to ask?" Lilly whispered.
Miley's eyes widened as she realized there was a big possibility that Lilly had moved on. That the relationship that they had before the fire, before Miley moved, before she pretty much abandoned Lilly, could mean nothing to the blonde standing in front of her right now. She choked back tears as she stepped back, biting her lip to try to keep her sobs from escaping. "I completely understand," she whispered. "I…I'm so sorry."
"What are you talking about?" Lilly asked.
"I should have known that after I left like that, you weren't going to wait for me," Miley said, tears in her eyes. "I…I just hope that we can still be friends."
"Do you really think…oh my God, no, Miley," Lilly said, stepping forward.
"Then what?" Miley asked. "You don't want to be friends, do you? I…I'm so sorry, Lilly. I shouldn't have gone to Juilliard, I know, but I…you were in the hospital, and we didn't know if you would make it, and everyone told me that I should just go to Juilliard because there wasn't a guarantee that you were going to live. They said that I should just try to forget. Bu I couldn't. You…you shouldn't be here…"
"Miley, shut up," Lilly said, pushing her against the wall and pressing her lips against Miley's. Miley responded fiercely, wrapping her arms around the blonde girl, running her hands through her hair. Lilly started to trail kisses down her neck and Miley moaned, throwing her head back and hitting the wall.
"We need to stop," Miley gasped, managing to get her hands around between them and pushing Lilly away. "Before this gets out of control. I can't…I have a meeting tomorrow and I…I'm sorry."
"What's the meeting for?" Lilly asked, pulling away with a confused expression on her face. "Didn't you retire Hannah before you went off to Juilliard?"
"Yeah, but I…I'm coming out with my own album," Miley said, looking away as her face flushed. "That's why I moved back here to Malibu. I know the label and my Hannah lawyer is here. They've proven themselves to be trustworthy and they've seen a lot of my work. Of course they're not allowed to associate Hannah to me in advertising, but the experience does give me a leg up on the competition."
Lilly stepped back. "I guess I should be going, then," she whispered. "I don't want to keep you from your career…"
"No, Lilly, that's not what I meant to imply," Miley said, catching Lilly by the arm and pulling her back towards her. "I want you to stay. We need to talk. Here, come on, I need to make a quick phone call, but then we can talk." She led Lilly out of the room and back to the bedroom she was now staying in. Lilly sat down on the bed as Miley picked up her cell phone and dialed a number, waiting impatiently for someone to pick up.
"Hey, Jill, it's Miley," the brunette said into the phone, facing away from Lilly and starting to speak more quietly. "Yes, I know it's two o'clock in the morning…will you just wait until I finish my sentence? Thank you. I won't be able to make it to the meeting tomorrow…yes, I know it's one of the most important meetings of my career, but something came up. I…yes, I know, Jill, I was freaking Hannah Montana for three years, I…no, I can't reschedule, this is important…just tell him it's my fault. I can…I was Hannah…yes, I know she's retired…"
She sighed and Lilly tapped her on the shoulder.
"Look, if it's too much trouble, then I can just leave and come back when you aren't already booked, okay?" Lilly whispered.
"No, I'll take care of this, you're too important…yeah, Jill, I know, but…no, you don't understand, Lilly's here…thank you, I owe you one. Thanks." Miley snapped her phone shut and turned it off, setting it on the bedside table and turning to face Lilly. "We have a lot to catch up on," she said.
"Who was that and why did she suddenly agree to cancel your meeting tomorrow when you told her that I'm here?" Lilly asked.
"That was Jill, my agent," Miley said, sitting down on the bed next to Lilly. "She was Hannah's agent, as well, and she was more than willing to be mine when I called her up and asked her a few weeks ago. I don't think she ever saw me without you, or Hannah without Lola, before I called her to try to draw up a contract with Hannah's old label for me. She asked where you were and told me that I was stupid for going to Juilliard and leaving you. That was the first time I really realized how stupid my decision was."
"You did what I would have wanted you to do," Lilly said gently. "Although I wouldn't have minded if you hadn't lost my phone number. I really would have liked to keep in touch with you."
"I'm really sorry about that…" Miley started.
"Don't be, I understand what happened," Lilly said. "It's just…I felt like everyone had abandoned me. Oliver…you know he was never the same after I broke up with him and we started dating. He took it personally, like he had single-handedly turned me gay or something. After the fire…I think he was scared because…because I looked different, and then I liked girls that I…I was different myself. That I had changed. He visited a couple days a week when I was in the hospital, but…the visits started to get less and less frequent, then he didn't come over to my house when I got out of the hospital. The calls stopped, then the texts, and when I saw him when I started to go out, he pretended that he couldn't see me."
"Oh, Lilly, I'm so sorry," Miley whispered, reaching out to Lilly, but the blonde flinched away from her.
"No one I saw at school wanted to talk to me," she whispered, starting to cry. "At first, they asked me where you were, but when I said that I didn't know…they thought you had gone straight and abandoned me. I…I was alone. My mom didn't understand. She…she thought that I should just get over what happened and get on with my life because…well, because that's what she had to do. She figured that nothing could be worse than all your belongings going up in a blaze of fire and told me I was lucky that I hadn't lost as much as she had."
Lilly burst into sobs, burying her face in her hands, and Miley slid over next to her, pulling her into a hug, holding her close as she struggled to get away.
"Don't you…dare try…to do this…Miley Stewart!" she yelled between her sobs, beating her chest with her clenched fists. "You…you left me! All…alone! Get…get away…from me!" She collapsed against Miley, her resistance growing weaker with every word and every blow, finally relenting to the comfort the brunette was offering her.
"I know, I know," Miley whispering, rubbing comforting circles on her back and stroking her hair softly as she rocked her back and forth and pulled her up on her lap. "You're right, I left you when you needed me most, and that was mean and horrible and incredibly stupid of me. And I understand why you're mad at me. I completely deserve for you to be mad at me and you would be completely justified to just slap me across the face and leave right now. But I don't want you to."
"That's the thing…" Lilly sobbed, pulling away from Miley slightly to look in her eyes. "I…I can't be mad at you. When…when I realized that I had your dad's cell number, I was so happy I dropped my phone five times before I was finally able to call him. And when I found out that you had moved back here…well, I pretty much broke into your house. No matter how much I want to be mad at you, I can't. And now…now I feel so stupid because you're…you're so beautiful and…and I'm ugly…and I can't…can't make it up to you…"
"Lillian Truscott, you look at me right now," Miley said sternly, surprising Lilly so much that she stopped crying. "You are not ugly, you are not stupid, and you don't need to make anything up to me at all. If either of us needs to make it up to the other, I need to make it up to you. No matter what anyone says or implies, you are the most beautiful girl that I have ever met in my life and I can't live without you."
"But…" Lilly whispered.
"No, Lilly, I should be on my knees right now, begging for you to take me back, but here you are, and while I would have rather that you had used the front door, I'm happy to have you here all the same," Miley said, kissing her nose. "And don't you even dare say that you're ugly. If anyone ever says that to you, I want you to tell me so I can punch their face in because I'm not going to have anyone tell my girl something that isn't true. That is…if you…still want to be my girl."
Lilly smiled softly. "Of course I do," she whispered, stroking Miley's cheek. "I just…I missed you so much and I was afraid that you wouldn't come back."
"I'll always come back," Miley said quietly, kissing Lilly. "If there isn't anything else you want to talk about right now that isn't pressingly urgent, I would like to get to bed. It's only about three in the morning and I think I have at least six good hours of sleep left."
"Yeah, okay," Lilly said dejectedly, slowly standing up. "Do you…do you want to get together tomorrow or something? I mean, I know you just got back in town and you probably have a busy schedule and want to get settled in…"
"Silly goose, why do you think I cancelled my meeting?" Miley asked, pulling Lilly back down on the bed. "You're staying here with me. If you don't want to…to sleep in my bed, then you can always have my old room. Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, you can sleep in Jackson's old room."
"Miley, I almost died once, I don't want to take my chances again," Lilly joked, starting to grin. "And of course I would love to stay the night in…in your bed, if you don't mind."
"Mind? I would actually prefer it," Miley said, standing up. "One minute, let me try to find some pajamas for you and then we can get to sleep. When we get up tomorrow morning, I'll make us breakfast and we can talk some more."
She went into her closet and came back out a few minutes later with a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. Lilly quickly changed into them and crawled into bed next to Miley, who turned the lamp on her bedside table off and closed her eyes to go to sleep. A few seconds later, she heard a small whimper coming from Lilly and turned the light back on to see her crying again.
"Oh, honey, what's wrong?" she asked.
"I…I just…don't want to wake up," Lilly whispered.
"No, no, no, this isn't a dream, you're awake," Miley whispered. "Don't cry, I hate to see you hurt. I would…I would rather feel a thousand times more pain than you've ever experienced than see you hurt."
"Just…tell me you love me," Lilly whispered. "You never tell me that you love me when I'm dreaming. I always wake up just then."
"I love you," Miley whispered, pulling Lilly close to her. "I love you so much, Lilly, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you a thousand times the size of the universe. A thousand times the length of the longest river in the world. A thousand times the highest mountain in the world. A thousand times more than anyone has ever loved anyone. A thousand times more than is possible."
Lilly began to breathe deeply and evenly, her eyes fluttering shut. Miley kissed her gently on the top of the head and turned the light back off, her own eyes starting to close as sleep began to overtake her.
"I love you a thousand times more than I should be allowed to," she murmured just as she drifted off.
I've been playing with the idea of writing this story for awhile now, so here I am, posting it. Yeah, it's kind of cheesy, but I was really needing to write something and nothing would come to me for my other stories, so I just added on piece by piece as I got some pretty bad cases of writer's block. And, yes, I know that the title is the same as my penname. That's why I've been playing with this idea for awhile. I'm glad that I finally finished it and was able to post it. I might post a sort of prequel for the background story or a sequel a few years in the future. It depends on what I feel like. If anyone has any ideas, feel free to leave it in your review or pm me. I'm always open. And I'll get updating my other two stories as soon as possible, 'kay? Thank you all for sticking with me, bearing with my random updates and one-shots, and for reviewing. I really appreciate it.
AThousandTimesMore ;)
(P.S. I almost forgot! REVIEW!!!!! Silly me! :D)