Why does this fandom continue to haunt me after all these years? I'll never be able to give this show up. I love it too much!

Also, why do I love hurting my Wes? He's my favorite character I should do nice things to him like have Travis rim him, instead I'm hurting him. Bad Silver. Bad.

Warning: Miscarriage.

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Pulling into his normal parking place at the station Travis let an amused smirk come to his lips as he looked over at his partners car. The younger man was kneeling in the backseat his ass half way out of the car as he did… Whatever it was he was doing.

The whole thing was just too tempting to pass up. He couldn't help but sneak up to the car and lift his hand up ready to slam it down on the hood. Then he heard Wes's voice from inside. He couldn't make out the words, but he knew that tone.

Oddly enough it wasn't one that he had heard from that man. He never sounded that desperate about anything. Which was saying something. Travis had seen the whole drunken breakdown that his friend had gone through during the months that were around the divorce.

That was really the last thing he liked to think about. As crazy as both of them acted when they were working it was nothing compared to how he had acted those few months. Travis had been terrified that his friend would do nothing to stop from getting himself killed.

It would have been too damn easy to get himself killed. For awhile that seemed like exactly what he had been doing. In four months the younger man had ended up in the hospital seven times. Each time he came so close to death and each time it was damn lucky he was still moving.

Captain had instructed the younger man that if he didn't start taking his life seriously than he'd have to let him go. Of course, that had lead to the man getting so drunk that the bartender had been forced to take his phone and call someone to get him. That someone was Travis.

Everyday for a week he was called to come get his partner. Somehow Was just seemed to get drunker each time. It would have been impressive if not for the fact the older man was worried that his friend would end up with alcohol poisoning and end up dead in a ditch somewhere.

More often than not Travis had been tempted to take the man's gun away for good. The last thing he wanted was to see Wes kill himself. At least not any faster than he had already been. It had been a toss up whether or not his friend would even be in the office some mornings.

It wasn't until the last time he ended up in the hospital after suspects car clipped him that things finally started to change. Travis had been in the middle of a lecture when Alex walked in looking almost as bad as her ex-husband did. Which was saying something.

The older man had left them alone to talk hoping that she could get through to the man before he ended up in a grave. Of course that 'talking' ended up in yelling and crying. None of which he had been able to understand. Not that he was listening in on them. Nope. Not at all.

After their conversation Wes had gone back to being himself. Well, he had mostly gone back to bring himself. It was not the man that he was used to, but he was glad to have the man back no matter how much they fought. And fight was exactly what they did. All the damn time.

Shaking his head the older man found himself leaning against his partners car causing the man to freeze. Slowly Wes climbed out of the car attempting to look composed, but Travis could see a wild edge to the blue eyes. That was an extremely dangerous look for the younger man to have.

"Don't tell me the famous clean freak has lost something," Travis teased a smirk on his lips.

"Shut up," Wes whispered slamming the door shut hard enough that the older man flinched, "Let's just go."

"If you want to keep looking..."

"Just get in the damn car."

Before Travis could say anything else his partner was in the drivers' seat the car already starting. A soft sigh fell from his lips as he climbed into the car himself. It was probably a horrible idea to let the man drive in the mood he was in, but pointing it out it would just make it worse.

Now they were on their way to couples counseling. Which, unsurprisingly, would make the whole situation worse. Hell, at this point in their relationship not even Travis would attempt to talk to Wes about anything outside of work when he was in the mood he was in. Something the group didn't know.

Today was not going to be a good day for them. They weren't even there yet and the older man was already wondering if anyone in group was going to cry or if there would be blood spilled. Both of which would not be all that surprising and also wouldn't be the first time.

Taking a deep breath to steel himself for what was going to happen he waited for the car to stop. It didn't take long for them to get up into the room where everyone was already waiting. As ususal they were the last couple to come and get seated. At least they weren't late. Again.

"Hello," Dr. Ryan smiled taking a seat causing everyone to fall silent, "Let up begin. Does anyone have something to share?"

For the first time since they joined the group Travis was silent. It wasn't going to take much to set his friend off and he really wanted to push that away for as long as possible. Which wasn't going to be long based off the look Dr. Ryan gave him.

"Travis? Wes?" the doctor questioned her pen already on her notepad, "Anything new with either of you?"

"Nothing new here," Travis with a grin knowing the younger man wouldn't, "Right, baby?"

"Don't fucking call me that," Wes growled out, "How many times do I have to say it before you listen? Don't call me that. Don't call me that! Don't fucking call me that!"

The group froze at Wes's tone. Travis knew instantly from how they either smirked or rolled their eyes that they thought it was a normal Wes reaction. He had to hope that the younger man didn't notice or that something else came up before that.

Unfortunately the younger man's eyes snapped over to a smirking Dakota. His head cocked to the side as he slowly stood up. Instantly Travis was on his feet ready to stop in if need be. God, how he hoped that the wasn't going to have to step in.

"Is my being uncomfortable funny?" Wes questioned his voice low and dangerous.

"Wes," Travis said stepping in front of him, "Come on, you're not in a good mind space right now. Don't do something you'll regret. Just sit down. Okay?"

Stormy gray eyes locked onto ocean blue a soft sound falling from his lips as he let the older man lead him back to his chair. Once they were sitting back down everyone started to relax again. Though no one was actually looking at them. Maybe that was a good thing.

"Wes," Dr. Ryan started her voice calm and soothing, "I'm not going to force you to talk, but if you want to I'm always here."

The words were meant to be soothing, but seeing the younger man flinch at them broke Travis's heart. He hated watching his friend be so hurt and not be able to do a damn thing about it. He always felt like a failure whenever Wes ended up feeling poorly.

"Ha-Have," the blond tried to speak only to have his voice break.

A heartbreaking noise fell from Wes as he buried his face in his hand. Without thinking Traivs was on his knees in front of his friend pulling him closer. The whole room was silent as the two men sat there attempting to give them a little time to compose themselves.

"My wallet," Wes muttered against Travis's neck, "Please."

"Alright," Travis responded instantly, "Which pocket is it in?"

"No, I lost it. I lost it. I lost..."

Travis had no idea why his wallet was so important, but he was ready to take the man's full weight when he fell into his arms. Rocking silently he held the younger man to him. The hold was probably too tight, but Wes wasn't complaining so he wasn't going to let go.

"That's what you were looking for," Travis muttered to himself before clearing his throat, "Okay, we'll check everywhere for your wallet. Your place, my place, your car, the precinct, and everywhere else. If we can't find it we'll go to that store you like that offers you drinks when you first walk in and get you a new one. Sound good?"

"No! You don't… I lost..."

"It's okay. I can fix this. I can. Just tell me what was in your wallet. What did you lose?"

Suddenly Wes was pushing Travis hard enough that he landed on his ass. All the pain that the younger man had been feeling seemed to morph into pure anger as he spun around and kicked his chair into the wall. Moving quickly Travis was on his feet trying to stop the man.

"Wes," Travis grunted trying to hold the man without either of them being hurt, "You have to stop. Come on. Calm down."

It was as if the man couldn't hear him as he tried to get away. An elbow rammed into his stomach causing him to almost lose his grip, but he was able to hang on. That was when Dr. Ryan took hold of Wes's face forcing him to stop unless he wanted to do major damage to her.

"I know you're hurting right now," Dr. Ryan spoke firmly, "But if you don't talk to me than we can't fix this."

"There is no fix," Wes answered shaking his head tears falling from his eyes, "No one can fix this."

"Wes."

"She's dead! My daughter is dead! How can anyone fix that?!"

Gasping Travis let go of his friend only to have the man crumble to the floor. Dr. Ryan and Travis shared a shocked look before turning their attention back to the blond. Who was curled in a little ball sobbing.

Gathering Wes into his arms. Travis held on tightly not knowing how else to comfort him. He hadn't even known that Alex had been pregnant. Though now it seemed as if the pregnancy hadn't gone on for that long. How could something like this happen to them?

"Oh, Wes," Dr. Ryan whispered moving so she was sitting on the other side of the man, "It's okay."

"Nothing is okay," Wes shook his head speaking between sobs, "I lost my baby girl. My baby."

"I know, Wes. I know. A sonogram picture was in your wallet, yes?"

"I had just gotten it. I was going to show it to Travis the day..."

"I know this is painful, but please tell us what happened."

For a few minutes the three of them sat on the ground in silence. There was nothing anyone could say at that point to get Wes to do anything. It would have to be his decision if he wanted to talk and Travis really hoped that his friend talked. He need to talk.

A shaky breath left the younger man's lips before he slowly looked up at the other detective. The look on his face was so broken and vulnerable and all he wanted to do was wrap a blanket around the man and never let him out of his sight. Obviously Wes was not capable of taking care of himself.

"We never found out why," Wes whispered his voice practically pleading Travis to believe it wasn't his fault, "Alex was at her office working on a case. She felt a pain in her stomach that made her worried, but we had an appointment with the doctor in two days and she didn't feel anymore pain. I should have forced her to go see him. I should have done something."

"Wes," Travis sighed rubbing at his back.

"We found out that we were having a baby girl right before the doctor said something was wrong. She didn't have a heartbeat."

Wes broke curling into Travis's chest. His whole body was shaking hard enough that the older man was shaking as well. As odd as it sounded tears were starting to gather in his eyes as well. It hurt so much to see the strongest man he knew sound so broken and in pain.

"It wasn't your fault," Travis said after a moment of silence, "It wasn't your fault, Wes."

"Don't," Wes pleaded his fingers gripping at Travis's Henley.

"No, this conversation is long overdue and you know it. What happened to your daughter is horrible and I am so sorry, Wes. I'm sorry, but it wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault. It was a tragedy. I get that it sucks having something happen for no reason, to have no solution, but you can't keep blaming yourself. You can't keep killing yourself like this."

"I can't just forget her, Travis."

"I know and I'm not asking you to. Just don't hide that away. Talk to me. I got your back, man. Okay? Promise you'll talk to me."

"Okay."

"Alright. Good. Let's go. We got a wallet to find."