An overwhelming sorry washed over the Brit; a sorrow so great it seemed it would last an eternity, barely healing as time quickly passed before his eyes. The determined face of the American, the deep hatred in his blue eyes that England had never witnessed, were permanently etched into his memories, haunting him. Out of all of the people in the world, he never expected, America, the one person he loved with his entire being, would give him that look. Did the boy know that he was going to destroy a relationship that would never completely mend, no matter how much they tried? That things would never go back to the way they were at the beginning? Did he know that he would crush the pieces of a heart already broken?
England knew that he was being selfish and too demanding. All he wanted was for America to stay his forever, to stay small, so that he could feel happy every second of his existence. Unfortunately, that true happiness was short lived. He thought he knew what was best for his little brother, so he continued to fight, thinking his was right when he really was wrong. He could not accept the painful truth: Change. America wanted freedom for his people and would do anything to achieve it, no matter how much it hurt the both of them, and hurt it did. England could not accept that America was getting older, too old to stay in his care and ready to fend for himself.
The British man longed for the days when America was a mere child, and how he could lure him to sleep by singing a short, yet sweet lullaby that was now unaccepted. The war changed England to the point where he acted cold towards others so he would never have to face a tragedy so massive again. The pain from losing a love and friendship so cherished lasts more than a lifetime.
Every year when the 4th of July comes around, England locks himself in his attic, where all the memories are stored, and sobs over the loss. Each year, he picks the scab, letting all of the blood pour out. Attending the huge, annual celebration thrown by America was out of the question. He wanted to, but all he could do was cry.