Meetings

Summery: A long overdue conversation and Snape gets his reward.

Disclaimer: JKR owns it all. Also, this story is unbetaed!

&&&&&

Severus Snape stood at that top of the Astronomy Tower, taking in a sun set, the golden color playing off his face, and reflecting off the small cup and saucer in his hands. The tea was still warm and steaming, a dark black color against the white cup.

A shimmering blue form came together slowly behind him, forming into a woman, abut seventeen years of age with what would have been red hair and green eyes. "Severus?" she asked uncertainly.

Snape spun around, the tea cup shattering against the cobblestones, his wand in his hand. "Lily?" he asked, surprise etched in every feature on his face. A rare moment for anyone to catch Severus Snape unawares, rather fitting it was a ghost who would witness it.

Lily took in the man before her. Dark circles under the eyes, hair lank and greasy, the slight tremble of hands, not from fear, but stress. The ever so slight receding of his hair line, from the same thing. Thin to the point just before mal-nutrition. He looked horrible, and rightly so. "Severus… you look so… worn."

Snape laughed despite himself, slipping his wand back into his sleeve. "Indeed."

Lily Evans crossed her arms over her chest, eyes narrowing. "Why?"

Snape looked up, raising a brow. "I could go on all night, Lily. Why what?"

"Why did you join?" She asked.

He mumbled something, turning back towards the sun set, his cloak shifting around his form, the shattered mess on the ground, forgotten.

"What?" She asked, her ears hearing without actually hearing.

"I didn't want to be alone." Snape muttered, and grasped the edges of his cloak, pulling them around his form as he crossed his arms.

Lily came to stand beside him, looking up with eyes that seemed to say, "Go on…"

Snape looked down at her and scowled darkly. "I had no one Lily. You had your Marauder friends, and I had no one. My family hated me, and most of Slytherin did as well, but I know why they did at least. I don't even know why my family did. They just did. Perhaps it's because I look like the iconic image of Evil. I don't know. All I did know was that there were people who were like me, and they would accept me for who I was, not just because I was a deft hand at Potions or had a habit of inventing obscure offensive spells."

Lily looked at the man with sympathy in her eyes. "I'm sorry."

Snape snorted, and sneered at her. It would figure she would come in the form that he remembered her best for. "No you're not. But I've learned to forget." The young woman noticed that he hadn't said the word "forgive".

The Potions Master took a breath, and plowed on before Lily could say anything. "Did you ever wonder why the Slytherins never bothered you? Aside from the random "Mudblood" comment?" The look in her eyes told him no. "I gathered information. Painstakingly and thoroughly, I gathered dirt on each and every one of them. Information I then used as a bargaining chip, and told them in no uncertain terms to leave you alone. I didn't care what they thought of me, I only cared for your safety after the kindness you showed me during first year."

"I thought we were friends…" she began, her expression twisting into confusion.

"I was your friend, Lily. You were… something else to me." He said slowly, as if every word of the admission were painful.

Lily looked up at him, memories coming back to her. She knew it. She had always known, but chose not to approach him about it. "What do you mean, Severus?"

He rounded on her so quickly that she took an involuntary step back, gasping. "I LOVED YOU!" He snarled out, his face twisting into an anguished visage, two spots of color appearing on his cheeks.

Lily looked up at him, sadness in her eyes. He plowed on, his voice rising with every word. "But you chose him! Potter! The same one you constantly yelled at for berating and bullying me! You hated him for it, but still you chose him in the end. I had hoped… oh I had hoped, but still you turned away." The feeling of betrayal came through in his voice, thick with emotion.

"But Sev-!" she began.

"Don't protest to ignorance! Don't you dare! I was skilled in Legilimency back then as well. You knew, and felt something akin to attraction to me as well, but you chose to keep stringing me along, letting me play the part of friend, helping you with Potions and the like. Using my affections to your advantage! But still I couldn't find it in my heart to hate you. I had thought that the attraction would grow if I showed you that our minds were equal, that we complemented each other in every way!" A tear fell from his right eye, and trailed down his cheek, the first time he had let them slip in almost twenty years.

Lily looked down at the floor, feeling ashamed. She had done it, whether as a willful act, or not wasn't important. The young woman hadn't know how strong his feelings actually were, but should have put a stop to it nonetheless. "I was scared!" she yelled back, angry.

"Yes, placed in a house were bravery is prized above all else, you were scared of me, when you knew in the back of your mind that you had three lap dogs who would do anything for you if you only asked. Lupin wouldn't, he would merely remain neutral, that coward." Snape snapped out, his words fast and unforgiving. "Are you sure you weren't sorted into the wrong house? With that statement, you seem more like a wishy-washy Hufflepuff."

Lily's aura flared with indignation. "How dare you! After you betrayed my family to the Dark Lord."

Snape raised the back of his hand up as if he would strike her, his eyes pools of hot molten anger, but restrained himself. She thought it was because she was a ghost and it would be a lesson in futility to try and hurt a ghost physicaly. Her thoughts were qucikly shattered and labeled in her mind as "wrong" when he muttered, "I am not my father." And lowered his hand, turning back to the sun set.

The first sun set after the Dark Lord's dimise. He had helped, after being cleared of murder by Minerva's testimony and a Pensive memory of Albus'. Snape was free, but still he stayed at Hogwarts. Like a man in prision to long, he had become "instatuionalized", and had no thoughts of leaving this place.

"Severus. I. I am so, so sorry. I know I can never find forgiveness from you, but I mean it all the same." She pleaed slowly, wringing her hands.

Snape looked at her, tear tracks evident on his face. "I didn't betray your family on purpuse. I had told the Dark Lord of the prophacy, but how was I to know he would go after you first? I… I would have warned you if I could. But he was gone after I told him."

Lily wanted to reach out and hug him, but couldn't. "I didn't know. Severus. I didn't know that you would have done that. When Harry had… joined us, he told me about you and what you did… and I wanted to find out the truth. I just… I don't know."

Harry had been killed in the final battle, destroying the Dark Lord as well, saving the wizarding world. Snape looked down at the matching white tombs below. "Tell Harry, I said, "Good Job.", would you?" he asked quietly.

"Yes, of course." She looked up at him, feeling that old attraction even now.

Snape gathered himself together, and banished the mess with a wave of his hand.

"When did you learn that?" Lily asked, her eyes wide.

"I belive after I left Hogwarts, but I had found the book in the library before Graduation." Snape said, his cloak billowing the the slight wind that always caught the tower.

Lily smiled. "Studious like always."

Snape nodded.

"Is there anything I can do for you, Severus?"

Snape looked at her, his eyes still radiating pain. "Yes. Leave me alone. I'll see you soon anyway."

Lily raised a brow in confusion. Snape pulled up his left sleeve, showing the Dark Mark, the darkest black imaginable, with thin spidery streaks of red. A form of blood posion, Lily thought imeaditly. "I have about five years left. A slow acting posion for which there is no cure was incorperated into the dark mark. Even after his death he haunts me. Oh well, the price you pay to Spy on the dark lord for the good of the world, you know." He said with the resignation of someone who was used to life not going their way.

Snape had never known happiness, and probaly never would, but that would only ensure him a place of honor in the afterlife, the same as Dubledore. Lily knew that, but wouldn't tell him. It would be a surprise, and she would greet him personally when he arrived.

Snape turned to leave, only to be stopped by her voice. "Severus wait." Lily walked around to his front and leaned up, brushing her ghostly lips against his. He stepped back, his eyes showing shock at not only the bucket of ice water feel of them, but the electric shock that shot through his body.

"What was that for?" Snape asked suspicously.

"A gift. I'll see you later, then." She repiled.

"Yes. Yes you will." Snape said, sqaring his shoulders and exiting the tower.

&&&&&

Snape had said five years, but to spite Voldemort he had lived another ten instead. During his last hours, laying in bed, fighting for every breath, his hair grey at the temples, he had many visitors, but none mattered more then his last group. Minerva, eyes red sat next to him, his hand clasped in hers, a hankie clasped in her other. Albus, in a ghost form floated at the foot of the bed, his eyes sad, and a small frown on his face. Most of the Order was there and gone already, Lupin stayed though, as did Mad-Eye Moody.

"Snape, you can't die. You're too damn stubborn!" Remus said, clasping the hand of his wife, Tonks, who was crying silently. Dispite his best attempts to keep himself separate from the rest, he couldn't do it completely.

"Lupin, you know this is the end. Don't waste your breath on stupid insults, I have'nt the strength." Snape said, coughing weakly.

"I was wrong about you, Snape. I… I am sorry." This from Mad-Eye.

Snape chuckled gently. "It's about time you said that."

Hermione Granger entered without a sound, Ron Weasely behind her, along with the rest of his clan. She walked over, robes brushing the floor gently, engagement ring on his finger. "Ahh. Weasley finally proposed. I take it he finally got his head out of his ass, then?" Snape asked, his eyes flicking to the ring.

Hermione nodded slowly, tears escaping her eyes. She leaned down and kissed him fully on the mouth, a deep sweet kiss. "I had the biggest crush on you in school, you know." She said finally, blushing crimson, while Ron behind her just looked to the floor. The red head and always known, and didn't feel the least bit angry at what she just did.

Snape just smiled then, a real genuine smile that no one had ever seen on his face before. "Grabbing that Gryffindor bravery with both hands, Miss Granger?" he asked followed by a joke, "Twenty points from Gryffindor for foolishness."

She laughed with the rest, tears coming from everyone as Snape's breath hitched, and became more labored. "You all (gasp) do me an honor by (gasp) coming here." He said, his eyes losing the coldness and becoming warm.

Molly sobbed openly, clinging to Arthur's arm tightly, while Ginny buried her face in Bill's shirt.

They sat in slience for a long while, during which Madam Pomfery checked his vitals, shaking her head. Snape looked up at them. "I am sorry (gasp) that I was such a horrible, (gasp) greasy, (gasp) git."

Fred and George wiped their eyes with the backs of their hands, smiling wanly.

As Snape felt his strength fade, his eyes locked with Dumbledore's. "It's time, son." The old wizard said slowly.

Snape nodded. "(gasp) Take care (gasp) of yourselves. (gasp) Minerva… Mrs. Weasley will be an excellent replacement for me. (gasp) Hermione… (gasp) don't let the (gasp) little bastards (gasp) walk all over you (gasp)."

Hermione sniffed and nodded, her eyes wet and glassy. "I won't."

Snape nodded. "Good. After I (gasp) pass, speak freely (gasp) of my flaws and (gasp) shortcommings, (gasp) for I will have (gasp) no ego to injure. Learn from them.(1)" He said, and then he gave a great rattling sigh, and was gone.

&&&&&

Snape stood before a set of white gates, his black robes a startling contrast to them. A pillar of darkness in the midst of light, he caught the attention of the gatekeeper. He was an elderly man with a name take affixed to his snow white robes, which read, "Hi my name is:" and scralwed below was the name "Peter".

"Severus Snape." The Potions Master said.

"Peter" looked up, and nodded. "Go right in."

As Snape stepped over the threshold he was greeted by four people, the Potters plus Sirius Black.

"Snape." James Potter said, nodding once.

"Potters" The dark man replied, putting an accent on the "S" at the end.

Lily looked at him and smiled brightly. "Good to see you Severus."

"You as well, Lily. Black." Snape nodded at Sirius who nodded in return. They were in no hurry to get all chummy, but they had eterinty to look forward to, and that was enough.

Lilly walked up to him and took his arm, leading him away. "Now, there's this interesting thing about soulmates, and I think you'll be pleasently surprised at who yours is…" she began, walking with him out of ear shot from the rest.

Harry grinned when Snape let out a shout of real joy and scooped Lily up in his arms, hugging her tightly. The Boy who Lived didn't hold any ill will for the soul mate thing, even if his dad did. God's plan was God's plan. The Heavanly Father was a lot like Dumbledore once you got to know him…

&&&&&

Loved it? Hated it? Tell me!

(1): A quote I found on the internet, lightly modified, by a man named Aaron McGruder who writes "The Boondocks" a comic strip in the US.