Piltover Blue

Chapter 1: Crime, Punishment, and Paperwork

"GET IN THE CAR DAMMIT GO, GO, GO!"

The sound of gunshots and panicked screams filled the streets as two men wearing ski masks practically dove into a vehicle that immediately began to speed away. As the car began to wildly drive through the streets the sound of sirens began to close in. It seemed the police department wasn't content with a set of would be bank robbers having even a chance of getting away.

The sun had only just risen in the great City of Progress, better known as Piltover. Despite it only being shy of seven in the morning, most business had been open for about an hour already. A city as advanced as this didn't get as far as it did by starting after dawn. The morning had so far been going well; the quiet bustle of the streets began to grow as more and more citizen began making their way to work. One of the places that had just opened its doors was the Piltover Federal bank; a smaller bank specifically for the police force and their families. While it was certainly no treasury building it still held a fair amount of Golden Hexes and Silver Cogs, which of course meant somebody, was eventually going to try and rob it. Why not steal from and piss off the Piltover PD in the same course of action. This is exactly what was going on this morning in particular.

The criminals had pretty much screwed up from step one; they had entered the bank shooting which immediately set off nearby alarms, then they failed to notice as one of the clerks hit the emergency button which sent a call to the police, then finally they were stupid enough to get tricked by the old dye pack routine. So all in all the robbery had gone pretty bad and it was about to get a whole lot worse, for them at least.

"Crap the cops are already on our tail! Drive faster you idiot!" yelled one of the men as the Hextech modified police cars were already closing in.

"I'm doing the best I can! You bought this piece of crap, this is your fault we're gonna go to prison! I can't go to prison!" yelled back the driver, clearly lacking the nerve for any kind of criminal activity such as this.

"Just shut up and get us out of here you fool!" reprimanded the other robber as he loaded his gun and began to lean out the window.

"Stop yelling at me man!" the driver quivered back sounding on the verge of tears

The robber now leaning out the window began to take pot shots at the cops behind them with his homemade fire arm. Mixed in with the occasional misfire in which the bullet simply fell out of the barrel of the gun, the bullet were doing little more than bouncing off the police cars currently in pursuit.

"Pull over immediately." Came over the loud speaker of one of the police cars in pursuit as vain as an attempt it was.

The robber currently hanging out the window laughed while sending a few more rounds at the police chasing them. "Ha like hell we will".

"Steady…" a thickly accented voice whispered inwardly.

Just as he was about to pull trigger he felt the gun in his hand literally be ripped apart. Little to the robber's knowledge the long arm of the law had just arrived.

On a rooftop a few hundred yards adjacent to the street they were currently driving on a lone sniper stood. Her purple corset dress and top hat standing out clearly against the blue sky, her long dark hair laid calmly as piercing cerulean eyes stared down the sights of the expertly made rifle which made shots such as these almost effortless. It was of course none other than The Sheriff of Piltover herself Caitlyn. It had been the first call of the day and she was less than pleased with the way things had started. She slowed her breathing, bringing her heart rate to crawl as she prepared another shot.

The driver of the getaway vehicle, which was very much failing at its title, was jolted as he felt the back left flank of the car get hit almost sending it into a tailspin. The driver quickly cranked on the wheel saving the vehicle getting it to drift around the corner. The other robbers quickly looked back to notice the police were no longer in pursuit, in fact the sirens had stopped entirely.

"Haha see I told you we would get aw-"

That was about all the robber got out as very hard impact sent the car tumbling into a nearby coffee shop. The vehicle continued to role until it stopped just at the feet of the barista who was just unlocking the door. As the car returned to its normal position the robbers made eye contact with the barista who's look of sheer terror would only be exceeded by theirs as they finally looked to see what hit them.

Looking over through the hole in wall they had just come through, light was pouring in which made it hard to make out the details of the silhouette currently standing in it. However as their eye's adjusted they didn't need much more detail to know how much trouble they were in. The outline was of a tall women with fists the size of some vehicles, one of these fists were cupped as the other fist continued to punch it, adding a nicely terrifying crunching noise to the situation. Her pink hair shown defiantly in the light as she slowly closed in on the trapped pray, who were currently doing everything they could to escape the mangled car.

"Oh I can't expresso how much I'm going to enjoy this." cackled cruelly, Piltover's Enforcer Vi as a sadistic smile spread across her face.

As the formerly in pursuit cop cars arrived on location only the terrified screams of the criminals could be heard echoing from the coffee shop.


"Cooooome on Cupcake."

"No"

"Please"

"No."

"What if I said pretty please?"

"Vi, you have to file the report, no ifs and or buts about it!" Piltover's Sheriff said stridently as she and her partner walked into her office, Vi still pleading to get out of doing paperwork.

"Come on Cait, it wasn't that bad." pleaded the pinkette as she did her best to use her puppy eyes on the Sheriff.

"You literally destroyed a coffee shop! Which wouldn't have happened had you not been late and taken the short cut I told you to!" the dark haired women exclaimed.

"Well better latte then never right?" the Enforcer proclaimed with a giant shit eating grin plastered on her face.

The dark haired sheriff, amazed at her partner's ability to be making puns in the current situation, put her head in hands with a sigh. Taking a drink of her morning tea she knew there was no beating her partner's often times childlike demeanor. Finally looking at her partner, who still had a dopey smile across her face, she spoke in a softer tone.

"That still does not excuse you from doing the paperwork."

"But" Vi interjected only to be cut off by Caitlyn.

"We also have evaluation next week, and you have done zero of your forms or filing for ANY of the cases you've worked this quarter."

Caitlyn looked up at her partner who currently was looking at her feet, lightly kicking the ground with one of her boots. The Sheriff let out a long dejected sigh as, looking at her partner, she felt like she had just kicked a puppy.

"Listen Vi, I know it's less than exciting…

"You can say that again…"

…but it has to be done. Look if you get it all in by tomorrow I promise to bake you one my cupcakes deal?"

The enforcer looked up with a smirk on her face, likely proud of the fact she got something out of this course of events. "You got it cupcake, how bad can it really be…" she said while flexing her bicep through her jacket.

A few minutes later Vi's face looked like it was going into shock as she looked at the pile of papers the clerk had just placed in front of her which was about a foot high.

"This is for the whole office right?" the brawler stuttered out hoping the situation wasn't as bad as it looked.

"No that's all for you Officer." The clerk replied flatly

"Oh wait no, there's a mistake…"

A small spark of hope appeared in the pink haired rebel's eyes.

"The Sheriff's got mixed in here too." Vi watched hoping a large portion of the papers would be removed.

The clerk then gently took the top piece of paper off and handed it to Caitlyn as appeared next to her crushed partner.

Vi was completely speechless for the first time in a long time, that alone made it all worth to Caitlyn as a small smile crossed her lips "Have fun partner." She said with a small wink at the end.

Vi's arms dropped to her sides as she watched the Sheriff stroll away proudly, That damn cupcake better taste like sex with an angel.