Alrighty then. My first steps into a new fandom. I found this story when cleaning up the bottom drawer of my desk – where I apparently had a few thumb drives with stories that I didn't even remember writing. The writing style was very me, though, so I suspect that, at some point, I did actually write it myself. Also, I remember some of them. But not all.
Anyhow. This is one of those stories. Now, those of you who have read some of my other stories know that, from time to time, my head can produce some rather weird stuff. If you haven't read any of my other stuff (yet): my head can sometimes produce some rather weird stuff. There, now everyone knows.
Also, I did a wee bit of rewriting on this. My younger-self was a fairly good writer (if I do say so myself), but there were still some weird sentence structures, annoying repetitions, instances of vague wording, et cetera. So, I made it into what it is now.
This story features Buffy and Dawn, who are sisters, doing things sisters are not usually doing. I'm not sure why young me wrote this, but old me (current me sounds nicer, so let's stick with current me.) Current me still thinks they'd make a cute couple. Shock. Gasp. Yes! This story contains incest. If you're not cool with that, or think I'm a despicable monster now, please go get your fix elsewhere.
TL;DR: Old story, contains lesbian incest.
For the third night in a row, she lay in bed, wide awake, staring at the ceiling and listening to the whimpering coming from the room across the hallway. Clearly, Buffy was having another nightmare. It wasn't that Dawn couldn't sleep now. Buffy wasn't a loud sleeper even if she had nightmares. There was no yelling or screaming, really. Just the creaking of her bed whenever she tossed and turned, the harsh breathing, and the occasional whispered pleas of 'stay away,' 'leave me alone,' or 'don't go,' depending on what nightly visions plagued her.
So yeah, it wasn't like Dawn couldn't sleep. She just didn't want to. She wanted to help, somehow. Yesterday, she had asked Buffy about the nightmares, but her sister had just brushed it off, telling Dawn not to worry, and that she didn't know what she was talking about.
Today, Dawn had asked again, badgering Buffy into admitting that she'd been having nightmares for some nights now. However, when she asked if she could do anything, Buffy had just told her not to worry. Again. Like it was that easy.
Why did people say that anyway? 'Don't worry, Dawn.' It's not like she had a button or switch that she could flip to turn her worries off. And even if she could, what kind of sister would she be if she didn't worry about Buffy?
And then there was the difference between worrying and worrying. Dawn worried about her sister when Buffy was taking her night time strolls around the graveyard, looking for vampires and other things that went bump in the night. She worried about Buffy when another world-ending prophecy was cast, and Buffy just so happened to be the only one who could stop it.
But this was different. All those times, Dawn had known Buffy could handle it. Somehow, her big sister could always handle it. But now, caught in the nightmares her own mind dished up for her, Buffy sounded so helpless. Fragile. Weak, even.
Following a particularly heart-wrenching whimper, followed by what sure sounded like a sob, Dawn huffed out a sigh, throwing her covers back and slipping her feet into the fuzzy slippers Xander had gotten her for her birthday. The trek to the room across the hall was a short but cold one, and Dawn made sure to be quiet as a mouse.
Knowing Buffy kept a stake underneath her pillow 'just in case,' Dawn carefully manoeuvred herself to the side of the bed, making sure to stay out of Buffy's immediate reach. A stake to the heart didn't kill just vampires, after all. "Buffy, hey," she whispered softly. "It's just a dream, Buffy. Shh, just a dream."
With lightning speed that Dawn should have foreseen – because duh, she's the Slayer – Buffy's hand shot out, fingers clamping around a dainty wrist like a vice grip. "Hey, it's alright," Dawn continued to whisper, smiling to herself as Buffy stopped tossing and turning, and her breathing seemed to smoothen a little. "Yeah, that's it… You just sleep," she murmured softly, trying to wriggle free from the hand gripping her wrist.
"N-No," Buffy's broken voice whispered, eyes scrunched close. "D-don't go."
"I'll be on the other side of the hall, Buffy," Dawn argued reasonable, before realizing Buffy was still asleep. "Right, that's no use." She continued her attempt to get free, stopping as Buffy sobbed, and she noticed a tear rolling down her nose. "Don't take her," Buffy cried, causing Dawn to stop their mini-wrestling match and inch closer to the bed.
"I'm right here, Buffy," she whispered, carefully laying her hand atop unruly blonde hair. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm safe. We both are," she continued softly. Apparently, she was doing this whole thing right, because Buffy sighed deeply in her sleep, keeping Dawn's hand tightly clutched, but seemed to be sleeping peacefully again.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Dawn felt both sleep and the cold creeping up to her. Momentarily debating with herself, she decided she might as well catch a few more hours of sleep, safely tucked away under the thick comforter.
She had memories of cuddling up to Buffy when she was a little girl and she had been the one plagued by nightly troubles. Of course, now she knew those memories were fake. After all, she was the Key, and she hadn't even existed a year ago, let alone ten…
Nevertheless, those memories came to mind when she pulled the blanket up – infinitely happy that Buffy still wore the same sleepwear she always did and not some skanky revealing outfit or anything – and snuggled into the welcoming warmth.
She briefly considered getting out again and returning to her own room when she felt Buffy's hand releasing her own, but the thought was immediately squashed as she felt the blonde's arm loosely drape over her waist, pulling the two of them closer together with a content hum.
Listening to Buffy's rhythmic breaths, Dawn felt her eyelids falling close with nothing she could do about it. Mere minutes later, her own breathing evened out as well, pleasant dreams overtaking her as she fell asleep with a small smile on her face.
Buffy's first thought was that she had overslept. Big time. Thankfully, her second thought reminded her of the fact that it was a Saturday, and she didn't have to make sure Dawn would get to school on time. Besides, if something important was going on, someone would've woken her up by now.
It was the first time this week she didn't wake up well before sunrise, drenched in sweat and feeling more exhausted than she had when she went to sleep in the first place. She could handle vampires, demons, and magic, but these nightmares were really starting to wear her down.
Only after peacefully laying in her bed, mind idly wandering from topic to topic, did she realize that she actually had her arm wrapped around someone, and that long, brown tresses were tickling at her nose. A deep breath through her nose confirmed what she had already suspected.
"Dawn?" she croaked, voice still weak.
"Mhn, five more minutes," the younger girl murmured, burying her face deeper into the pillow. "And someone turn the sun off."
Buffy spared a quick glance at the alarm clock on her nightstand. 10 am. "I can give you those five minutes and then some," she sighed. "But if you want the sun turned off, you should talk to Willow and Tara."
"Mmkay," Dawn merely murmured, not taking her face out of her pillow.
"Also," Buffy continued cheerfully. "Wanna tell me why you're in my bed?"
"No. Sleep. Buffy tired," Dawn groused, finally turning her head sideways. "Talk later. Sleep now."
"Sleep now, talk later, I hear ya," Buffy said with a smile, turning into a laugh as Dawn wiggled around under the sheets, inching closer to Buffy's warmth.
It was considerably closer to noon when Dawn finally lifted her head from her pillow, scrunched up her nose, and turned towards Buffy. "You stink," she laughed, playfully scurrying to the other side of the bed.
"Excuse me?" Buffy responded, affronted.
Dawn crinkled her nose again. "Scratch that, we both stink. I'm going to take a shower."
"Dawn?"
"Yeah?" her younger sister asked, face turning serious.
"Why were you in my bed?"
"You had another nightmare. I came in to comfort you or whatever… But you wouldn't let go of me, so I figured I'd just sleep here. It seemed to calm you down, so…"
Buffy sighed. "It did. Thank you…"
"Cool, no biggie," Dawn chirped, hopping off the bed and slipping her feet in her fluffy slippers before locking herself up in the bathroom.
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Buffy took a moment to get her thoughts in order. Tonight, after a more-than-annoying patrol, she'd managed to track one of the vampires to their nest, located in one of the crypts in the oldest part of the graveyard.
There had been six of them, and under normal circumstances, Buffy should not have had any trouble taking them all out. She had still managed, but one of them had come dangerously close to turning her own stake into her demise…
And now she was facing another night of terror in her dreams as well. Not about the staking thing. That was worrisome, but nothing to have nightmares about. Losing your friends and family, one by one, to the clutches of the Hellmouth? That was nightmare material.
A little, selfish voice inside her head told her to go into Dawn's room, wake her up and drag her into her own bed. She couldn't remember the last time she had slept as well as last night. But that wouldn't do. These nightmares were her problem. She was the Slayer, not Dawn.
Hopelessly dropping her head on her pillow, Buffy resigned herself to her nightly troubles, closing her eyes, and feeling the familiar sense of tiredness washing over her.
She felt like she'd been laying like that for only a few minutes when she heard someone whisper her name harshly, a prodding finger poking against her nose. "Buffy, wake up!"
"Huhwha?" she mumbled, bolting upright. The moment her eyes opened, she remembered the dream she had been having. "Dawn?" she mumbled blearily, looking at her sister.
"You were having another nightmare," the younger girl stated matter-of-factly.
"I'm sorry," the blonde replied softly. "I didn't mean to wake you up."
"'S fine, I wasn't asleep yet. Besides, it's not like you can stop the nightmares from coming, right?"
"Ugh, I wish," Buffy sighed. "You can go back to bed now, Dawn. I'll be fine."
"Don't be silly," Dawn laughed quietly, kicking off her slippers. "Scoot."
"What?"
"Well, it worked last night, didn't it?" Dawn argued reasonably. "I'll just spend the rest of the night here. It will make you sleep better, which will hopefully mean you won't get nearly-staked by another vampire tomorrow."
"Willow told you about that, huh?" Buffy murmured as she moved to the edge of the mattress.
"Tara let it slip," Dawn yawned. "Now shut up, I'm trying to sleep here."
"Yeah, yeah," Buffy retorted tiredly, followed by a long beat of silence. "Thanks, Dawn," she murmured once they were both settled in.
"Don't mention it," Dawn murmured back just as quietly.
"Giles! Are you here?" Buffy practically yelled as soon as she stepped through the Magic Box' front door. "Anya, is Giles here?"
Anya, standing behind the cash register with a handful of cash, despite no customers being around, looked only mildly annoyed. "He's in the back, but I'm sure he heard your profound screaming. He's old, but not deaf," she said with a wide smile, before returning to sniffing the money in her hand.
As predicted, Giles' head poked out from behind the backroom door. "Buffy? Why are you here?"
"We need to talk. Slayer stuff," the blonde remarked curtly, already making her way into the training room.
"Of course," Giles nodded sagely. "Anya, would you take care of business for a while?"
"I've been having nightmares," Buffy confessed as soon as Giles closed the door behind them.
"Dear God," the older man murmured, taking off his glasses to clean them with his handkerchief. "And you think they're prophetic dreams?"
"I don't know, you tell me," Buffy huffed. "That's your job, right? Telling me stuff like this?"
"It's not that simple, Buffy, you know that," Giles hedged. "How long have you been having these nightmares?"
"Um, a little over a week?"
"I see. And they're about-"
"Things that go bump in the night. Eating my friends. Just last night, your brains were liquefied by a Vorka demon, after which he drank them."
"Dear God," Giles repeated, still polishing his glasses. "We haven't seen Vorka demons for months, though."
"I know," Buffy sighed. "I dreamt about Glory, too, and we're sure she isn't a threat anymore… I guess it's just the abstract threat out there that worries me."
"There is always an abstract threat out there, Buffy," Giles explained for the umpteenth time. "We live on the Hellmouth, it is only to be expected-"
Stopping himself at Buffy's full-powered glare, he quickly changed direction. "But I will look into it and let you know if I find anything."
"Thanks, Giles. I knew I could count on you."
"Of course, Buffy. I'll call you if I find anything."
Dawn sat in front of her vanity, slowly pulling her brush through long, brown tresses as she debated the dilemma she found herself facing. Buffy had just returned from her patrol, and had gone to bed about five minutes ago. She could still hear the blonde moving about in her room, probably putting away her stakes and holy water, changing into her sleepwear, and doing whatever it was she did to get ready for sleep.
She was wondering whether she should go to bed, and make the trip to Buffy's room when the blonde inevitable started having her nightmares, or whether she should just save herself the cold mid-night trip and go straight to Buffy's bed.
With a small dip of her head, she got up from her perch and quickly made her way out of her room. In the hallway, she gave a quick, slightly awkward wave to Willow, who was just exiting the bathroom with a toothbrush dangling from her mouth.
"I bet she's wondering what I'm up to," Dawn muttered under her breath as she knocked on Buffy's door. The lights were still on, so that meant she couldn't be asleep yet, right?
"Come in," her clear voice called from the other side of the wood. As Dawn stepped into the room, Buffy looked at her quizzically, hairbrush hanging limply in her hair. "Hey Dawn. What's up?"
"I figured, since I'll be sleeping here anyways, I might as well just save myself the trouble of the midnight move and, well, y'know…"
"Oh," Buffy hummed slowly. "You don't have to..."
"I don't mind," Dawn hastily clarified. "I mean, you look a lot better now than you did two days ago, so…"
"Okay. I mean, if you really don't mind…?"
"I really don't. And um… what are you doing with your hair?"
"Shut up," Buffy groused playfully. "I had a tumble with a vampire, and now my hair is all stubborn and trying to eat my hairbrush. Hey, no laughing!"
"I'm sorry," Dawn snickered. "Here, sit down. Let me?"
Sitting down with a pouty face, Buffy allowed Dawn to take hold of the hairbrush, and the younger girl quickly started untangling it from the clutches of her sister's hair. With that done, she continued to brush the blonde strands until they all fell to Buffy's shoulders in loose tresses, before playfully petting the top of her head. "Good girl, all done."
"Way to ruin a sisterly moment, Dawn," Buffy muttered with a roll of her eyes, before turning off the lights and dropping herself on the bed.
Dawn carefully crawled under the comforter herself, making sure to keep some distance between her and Buffy. While sleeping Buffy certainly had no qualms about their midnight cuddling, Dawn wasn't sure how awake-Buffy felt about it.
"Sure is cold tonight," Buffy mused out loud after a few minutes of silence.
"Heh. Yeah, it sure is," Dawn mused in return.
"We could…" Buffy started, only for her voice to falter for a moment. "I mean, it'd be warmer…"
"Yeah," Dawn responded demurely.
A moment later, she felt Buffy sidling up behind her, the warmth of her body snugly against Dawn's back. "Hey, Buffy? Why am I always the little spoon?"
"Because you're younger," Buffy immediately replied.
"But I'm taller than you are, now,"
"Do you want to switch?"
"Can we?" Dawn asked, wincing at the hopeful tone in her voice.
"Sure, why not," Buffy replied as she turned around.
Dawn turned to her other side as well, sidling forward until her hips pressed against Buffy's lower back. It was a strange feeling, having her breasts pushed up to her sister's back, but she didn't put any thought in it as Buffy grabbed her wrist and wrapped it around herself. "Sleep tight, Dawn."
"Yeah. Sleep tight."
This time, when she woke up in the middle of the night, it wasn't because she'd had a nightmare. She just really, really had to pee. Despite that, she couldn't quite find herself to disentangle herself from Dawn and the warmth that lingered under the comforter, instead opting to try and remember the pleasant dream she'd been having.
It took her a few moments to realize that, in their sleep, they'd returned to the same position they'd been in previous nights – Buffy taking the position of the big spoon. It took her ever longer to realize that, somehow, in her sleep, she'd snaked her hand underneath her sister's shirt, hand firmly clasped over-
"Oh god," she whispered under her breath, hand shooting off of Dawn's breast as if burned. She quickly shuffled her entire body backwards, away from Dawn, and practically dropped off the other side in her frenzy.
She quietly but quickly padded to the bathroom, taking a heaving gulp of cold water and taking a good look at herself in the mirror. "Deep breaths. It was just a silly thing that happened while I was asleep. Dawn didn't notice, no one needs to know. Nothing's wrong. Deep breaths," she told herself.
When she returned to her room a few minutes later, she was mildly shocked to find Dawn sitting upright, sleepily rubbing her eyes. "Hey," she croaked, "you were gone."
"Yeah," she muttered, even though it obviously hadn't been a question.
"Another nightmare?" the brunette asked with a frown on her features.
"No, I just had to… bathroom," Buffy explained lamely.
"Ah," Dawn nodded. "Come back to bed?"
"Yeah…"
Laying down on the far side of the bed, Buffy internally prayed for Dawn to stay away from her. When her little sister, who wasn't a mind reader, sidled up against her nonetheless, Buffy felt herself stiffen for a moment, before relaxing into the welcoming warmth again.
This was fine. She wasn't doing anything wrong right now. Dawn was just keeping the nightmares at bay, and sleeping close together meant sharing warmth. Nothing wrong with two sisters keeping each other warm. It had just been a fluke. It would not happen again.
With that comforting thought, Buffy closed her eyes and drifted off into a peaceful sleep once more.
Dawn mindlessly chewed her funny-shaped pancake, barely registering its taste as her unfocused gaze remained on the cartoons flickering on the television screen. Her mind kept taking her back to last night.
He had been sleeping soundly when a tickling sensation across her stomach had woken her up. Only when the fog of sleep had sufficiently lifted had she realized that Buffy had, somehow, managed to slip her hand underneath the shirt she was wearing and well-manicured nails were idly scratching the area just above her navel.
She wasn't particularly ticklish, and the sensation hadn't been unpleasant in the slightest, so she'd just closed her eyes again, content to let Buffy's wandering hand carry on while she drifted back into sleep. She hadn't thought anything of it when the hand slowly meandered upwards.
That had changed when her sister's hand came to rest atop her breast, occasionally giving a rub or soft squeeze. Dawn had whispered Buffy's name a few times in a futile attempt to wake her up, until something had stopped her. She still wasn't sure why she hadn't persisted.
Not quite true, the little voice in her head told her. You know why you didn't wake her up. If you had, she'd certainly have removed her hand. And you have to admit it felt pretty good.
No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't manage to silence her inner voice. She also couldn't honestly say it wasn't speaking the truth. She'd never been touched – not like that, at least – and the sensation had sent a host of strange feelings and emotions through her body.
She had ended up torn between wanting Buffy to wake up, and wanting the fondling to continue. She knew it was wrong, of course. Sisters shouldn't touch each other like that. But if felt so good, and Buffy was obviously not even aware of what she was doing, and it wasn't like they were hurting anyone, right?
Dawn shook her head at herself. She was putting way too much thought in such a silly, one-time thing.
"Hey Dawnie," Willow called as she came barrelling down the stairs. "You ready for school?"
"Um, yeah," the brunette called back, sound muffled by the bite of pancake still in her mouth. "Just let me grab my bag!"
Buffy heaved a deep sigh as she silently made her way up the stairs. It had been a long, tiring patrol. Naturally, the night after Giles had pointed out they hadn't seen Vorka demons in ages, a whole pack of them showed up practically on their doorstep, threatening to slurp the brains out of Sunnydale's unsuspecting citizens.
On the bright side, Dawn would most certainly be soundly asleep in her own room by now, saving Buffy from the worries about accidentally feeling up her little sister again tonight. The thought brought a tired smile to her face. Nightmares were preferable over the whole touching-Dawn dilemma.
The smile instantly vanished as she stepped into her room, finding the lights to be on and the object of her thoughts sitting upright in her bed, very much awake. "Dawn, what are you doing in my bed?"
The brunette looked up with a surprised expression. "Math… I think?" she replied sheepishly. "How was patrol? I didn't hear you come back."
"That's because I was trying not to wake you up," Buffy accused mockingly. "Aren't you supposed to be asleep by now?"
"I would be, but someone keeps insisting I do my homework."
"Imagine that," Buffy retorted dryly.
"Yeah, I know, right?" Dawn laughed quietly. "Go and get ready for bed."
Buffy quickly did as she was told, all the while trying to stomp down on the growing nerves that were threatening to take over her system. Last night, after going to bed, everything had been perfectly fine. Dawn remained unawares, and the chances of it happening again were beyond small. Everything would be fine.
She had thought that listening to Buffy's deep, steady breaths would manage to lull her into sleep, but so far, she'd had no such luck. Dawn idly swept a strand of hair away from her nose, giving serious consideration to the concept of counting sheep to fall asleep.
Her thoughts were thrown into a wholly different direction as she felt Buffy's hand – innocently resting in front of her stomach, twitching a few times. It immediately brought back images of last night, how that hand had made the same movement in a decidedly less innocent spot, and how very nice it had made her feel.
She watched as her own long, slender fingers softly traced a pattern on the back of Buffy's hand. The thought of moving Buffy's hand to that much more desirable position briefly shot through her head, but she quickly dismissed it.
Still, she wanted to experience that feeling again. It wasn't the same when she tried to do it herself. And she couldn't very well ask someone to do it for her. Her sister was the Slayer, and she was just as likely to stake possible suitors as she was vampires.
Dawn quickly held her breath as she realized she had already gripped Buffy's wrist and trekked it halfway up towards its destination. This was crazy. Sisters didn't do this. Sisters didn't want their sisters to do this.
And yet she did want this. Without thinking what it meant, or what the consequences of her actions might be, she completed the journey and settled Buffy's hand over her breast. If the blonde woke up, she'd just… she'd… yeah, well, she'd figure that out when the time came.
She couldn't keep from gasping audibly as Buffy's fingers twitched again, giving her small breast a firm squeeze, one finger rubbing over her nipple. Okay, sleep is so not going to happen now.
Buffy woke up in the middle of the night, but again, she couldn't remember having had a nightmare. For a moment, she lay staring at the clock, wondering why she had woken up. Not feeling nature's call, she idly decided she'd just go back to sleep.
Trying to reposition herself to be more comfortable made her realize where she had stuck her hand. Again. She quickly tried to retreat her hand to a safer and much more innocent place. Say, for example, the graveyard three blocks from her bedroom, where she could take her frustrations out on some unsuspecting vampires or demons.
When she actually pulled her hand back, though, she found her arm to be firmly held in place by Dawn's, who had crossed her arms in front of her, trapping Buffy's. The blonde remained frozen in place, mind flitting about in a frenzied attempt to plot an appropriate course of action.
What it came up with, after much hard labour, was decidedly not appropriate.
When her fingers gave a soft squeeze, it was almost as if it was not even her own hand doing it. When she felt the pliant flesh push back against her grip, she felt overcome with the desire to do it again. She gently massaged Dawn's breast for a few moments, being vigilant of any change in Dawn's breathing or position that could indicate her waking up.
She involuntarily smiled as she felt her sister's nipple stiffen against the palm of her hand. The brunette's breathing quickened a little, but the soft murmur assured Buffy that Dawn was still soundly asleep.
She was surprised to find herself disappointed when Dawn's arm slackened, allowing her to take her hand away from the comfy spot she was currently exploring. As she slowly took her hand away, Dawn suddenly bucked her hips backwards, buttocks firmly pressed against Buffy's front.
Now it was her own breath that was quickening, a new and surprising feeling snaking its way through her. No, not new. She'd felt this before. With Angel. With Riley.
Her hand instantly froze, and Buffy looked at her own fingers, no longer residing on Dawn's breast, but instead lingering just above the waistband of her shorts.
"God, what is wrong with me?" she whispered to herself, backing away from her little sister, and scurrying out of the bed. This was so wrong. She was getting aroused. From touching Dawn.
Within minutes, she was fully dressed, axe strapped to her belt and stake in hand, setting off into a sprint towards the graveyard.
"Round, or funny shapes?" Tara asked as she plopped down at the kitchen counter.
"Does it really matter?" Dawn asked. "They usually turn out funny shaped anyway, right?"
Tara shot her an apologetic smile as she placed a plate with funny shaped pancakes in front of her. "Are you feeling okay?" she asked with a small frown. "You look tired."
"Yeah, didn't get much sleep," Dawn mumbled dismissively, shoving a bite of pancake in her mouth. More like, didn't sleep at all.
"Buffy still asleep?"
"Nah, she got up early this morning. I think she went out to look for that Vorblah demon thingy." No need to tell Tara that Buffy bolted from her bedroom in the middle of the night after feeling her up. Some things were best left unspoken.
"Oh, okay. Want me to drive you to school today?"
"Um, yes, please," Dawn smiled in return, rolling her eyes because Duh.
Warm puffs of air tickled the side of her throat as nimble fingers painted an intricate pattern over her stomach. Releasing a soft hum, she urged the fingers to travel higher, sighing happily when they ghosted over her breasts, drawing shrinking circles around her nipples.
She opened her eyes with a smile, which grew only wider as she watched Buffy hovering over her, eyes fixated on the movement of her fingers. A palm pressed down on her left breast softly, kneading it as the fingers of the other hand teased at her nipple.
She wanted to protest when one hand moved away from her breast, instead travelling back down her belly, and beginning to tease at the hem of her shorts. The protest died before she could utter it as Buffy wrapped warm, soft lips around her right nipple, tongue teasingly flicking the nub.
The hand that had been teasing the hem of her shorts now dipped underneath it. She wasn't wearing underwear. Why wasn't she wearing underwear? Not that it was important, now that Buffy's fingers combed through-
"Miss Summers!"
With a startled yelp, she bolted upright.
Classroom. Math. Right, it was just a dream.
A very confusing dream…
"Willow, I need your help!" Buffy practically hissed as soon as she closed the bedroom door behind her.
The redhead was sitting on the bed cross-legged, heavy tome resting in her lap, focused on symbols that Buffy didn't even recognize. "Sorry, I should've knocked."
"That's okay," Willow shrugged. "I was just looking up a more sophisticated locator spell."
"I need your help," Buffy repeated, this time more as a groan.
"So you've said. What's up?" the ever-perky redhead asked with a grin.
"I'm a monster!" the blonde whined, dropping face-first onto the bed.
Willow looked at her carefully, before canting her head sideways. "You don't have horns or a tail. No scales, no fangs. You look the same as you always do, which leads me to surmise you're being metaphorical."
"I need you to do a spell," Buffy muttered.
"A spell? I can do a spell. I can do lots of spells," Willow started enthusiastically. "But," she continued slowly, "I do need you to tell me a little more if you want a helpful spell."
"I have… feelings," Buffy admitted slowly, not wanting to give Willow anything specific. If the redhead knew what was going on in her head, she'd probably perform some sort of brain-removal spell. And Buffy couldn't blame her, either…
"Okay," Willow said, clearly trying to urge Buffy on.
"And thoughts."
"So, you have feelings and thoughts, and that makes you a monster?"
"Yes!" Buffy exclaimed, glad Willow understood.
"I don't think I understand," the young witch admitted with a frown.
"I need you to remove them!"
"The feelings and thoughts? Do you mean like anxiety or something, because I have a potion for that. I've been meaning to test it, but-"
"No, not anxiety," the blonde interrupted.
"Then you have to be a little more specific…"
"I need you to do a love spell. But in reverse," Buffy rushed out.
Willow winced visibly. "I don't know, Buf… Do you know the last time someone tried to do a love spell?"
She did. Amy had messed that one up pretty badly, making the entire town fall madly in love with Xander. Including her mother. And Xander's mother. She cringed. "Yeah, but this wouldn't be anything like that. You're a much better witch, and I want a reverse love spell. What could go wrong?"
Willow took a deep breath. "I could make you hate someone. I could make you hate everyone. I could turn you into a supervillain who wants to dye her hair black and end the world because she hates everyone. I could make everyone hate you. I could start a full-on Anti-Slayer war here in Sunnydale. I could make you fall in love with someone else by accident. I could make you fall in love with a demon. Or Giles."
Buffy cringed again.
"Why would you want me to do an anti-love spell anyway?" Willow asked softly. "Isn't being in love a good thing?"
"No!" Buffy yelled, abhorred.
"Oh… I see what's going on," Willow nodded slowly.
Buffy's eyes widened. "You do?" she asked fearfully.
"Yeah. Spike's constant admissions of love have finally paid off, and now you're in love with him too."
That was so ridiculous, Buffy actually had to laugh. "Ew, god, no, Willow! How could you think that?"
"Well, you looked pretty appalled with yourself, so I figured it had to be pretty bad."
"It's not… Actually, it's much worse than that."
"Worse than Spike?" Willow asked in disbelief.
"Much."
"Is it Giles?" the redhead continued to speculate.
Buffy could only hope that her deadpan glare clued the redhead in to the fact that it was not Giles.
"Then I don't know… And whoever it is, I really don't think we should do a spell to combat it. There's too much that can go wrong."
"It's Dawn," Buffy whispered under her breath, wanting the witch's help, but not really wanting her to know at the same time.
"Dawn?" Willow asked, looking pensive for a moment. "I don't think I know a Dawn… Wait… Dawnie?"
Buffy cast her eyes down as she nodded gravely, only looking up when the redhead burst into a fit of laughter.
"What's so funny?"
"Oh, Buffy, you're Dawn's sister. Of course you love her!" Willow explained, gently patting the blonde's shoulder.
"That's not-"
"I know it's strange, with her being a magical being of energy up to a few months ago and all that, but-"
"I know, but-"
"It's really nothing to worry about, Buffy. It's normal."
Buffy cocked an eyebrow, looking at the redhead defiantly. "You mean it's normal for me to wake up in the middle of the night, holding Dawn's breast in my hand and not being able to keep myself from, from… you know!" she finished in an affronted whisper.
There was a long-lasting silence between the two of them. Buffy expected to see disgust and revulsion appear on Willow's face any moment, but to the redhead's credit, it didn't come. Instead, she nodded her head slowly.
"I can see how that would be upsetting," she conceded in a thoughtful murmur. "Is that why the two of you have been sleeping together?"
"What?! Willow, no! Dawn only sleeps in my room because of the nightmares!"
"Ah," Willow nodded, as if she suddenly understood. "So, you didn't…?"
"Only her breast. Twice," Buffy admitted with a wince. "I almost did more, though. I wanted to do more. That's why I was out all night. I kept imagining doing things to her. The non-sisterly kind of things."
"Oh…" Willow looked baffled for a moment, clearly trying to work through the issue in her head.
"Is it just a physical thing?"
Figuring Willow wouldn't be able to help her if she wasn't entirely honest, Buffy kept from blurting an immediate answer. "How can I tell the difference?"
"I could do a spell?" the young with suggested.
"God, yes," Buffy grunted in relief.
"To tell the difference," Willow clarified.
"Oh… well, that's good too," Buffy shrugged. At least it would help them move things along.
The blonde just waited patiently while Willow placed a hand on her forehead, staring at a point somewhere above her left shoulder. "Reveal," the redhead whispered quietly, eyes immediately turning glassy.
Almost five minutes passed before Willow's eyes turned clear again, and Buffy wasn't sure she liked the fiery red shade her skin was turning into. "Okay," Willow breathed, letting the word trail off into nothingness.
"So?"
"I see your problem… You've got it pretty bad," Willow said with a sympathetic pat on her knee.
"So you'll do the counter spell, right?" Buffy immediately asked, voice laced with hope.
"No."
"But Willow-"
"There's too much that can go wrong, Buffy," Willow continued, looking mind-numbingly stubborn in her resolve. "I can't take the risk. Besides, while your feelings for Dawn are certainly… um… romantic, I don't think it makes you a monster…"
"But I'm her legal guardian, and-"
Willow raised a hand, cutting Buffy off. "If you don't get over this naturally, you should discuss it with her. I mean, I don't know what the future holds, and how Dawn will feel about all this, but… Well, maybe it's not all bad."
"Not all bad?" Buffy repeated disbelievingly. "How can this not be bad?"
Willow's only response was a meaningful silence and a pointed look.
"You mean?" Buffy continued, not able to actually speak the words. "Dawn and I? Like… like you and Tara? That's-"
Willow shrugged helplessly. "We can't choose who we love. Or who we don't love."
Dawn dropped her schoolbag on the couch, before moving on to the kitchen, where Tara was working on their dinner. "Hey!" she chirped. "Buffy home?"
"She's upstairs, discussing something with Willow. Why?" Tara asked, turning the fire down and giving Dawn her full attention.
"No reason. Spike's outside, probably wanted to talk to her."
Tara nodded, indicating she already knew. "He's been there since sundown. Willow told me their last argument about Spike's love for Buffy turned physical, and Spike probably wants to apologize for hurting Buffy."
"He did what?" Dawn asked, eyes flashing with anger. She was already out of the kitchen and into the front yard before Tara could respond.
Spike was still lounging against the tree, tacky trench coat flapping in the winter breeze. "Hi," he murmured, all suave and cool, "Buffy home?"
"You sleep, right?" Dawn asked, fists resting on her hips, eyes narrowed and jaw clenched.
"What?"
"You sleep, right?" she repeated.
"Um. Yeah?"
Dawn nodded, more to herself than to Spike. "I know I can't take on a vampire. Even if that chip keeps you from hurting people. But if you hurt Buffy again, you'll wake up on fire."
For a moment, she expected Spike to laugh. The bleached-blond vampire, however, took a good look at Dawn, and apparently felt her resolve, choosing to make a hasty departure, stumbling over the hideous garden gnome at the edge of their yard as he backed away from her.
Quickly retreating back into the kitchen, Dawn found Tara still working at the counter. "Spike's gone," she chimed easily.
"What happened?" Tara asked, turning to face Dawn again.
"I threatened to set him on fire," the young brunette responded matter-of-factly, taking a bite from the single apple sitting in the fruit bowl.
Tara's eyebrows hiked up, and Dawn was sure she'd get a speech about threatening a vampire, so she decided to switch the subject while she still could. "I need to ask you something important. But you can't tell anyone. Especially Buffy."
"Okay…" Tara agreed slowly.
"How did you know you were gay?"
Clearly, Tara hadn't been expecting that question, eyebrows raising even higher as her eyes widened. "U-um… I-I don't k-know… Why do y-you ask?"
Dawn stared out of the window for a moment. "I think I might be gay," she eventually admitted.
Tara turned the stove off, sitting down across from Dawn. "Why do you think so?"
Dawn hesitated for a moment. "I fell asleep during math today-"
"Dawn," Tara interrupted in the voice that she knew meant 'academics are important and you must always do your best at school.'
"I know, I know, but that's so not the point right now," she continued hastily, glad to see Tara giving a reluctant nod. "Anyhow, I had this dream… About this girl…"
"And?" Tara spurred her on.
"We were in bed," Dawn continued, shooting Tara a meaningful glance, hoping to get the point across without actually having to get the point across.
"Ah," Tara hummed with a wise nod. "That doesn't have to m-mean anything, Dawnie…"
"Then how do you know?" the younger girl asked again.
"Do you want to be in bed with her… L-like that, I m-mean?" Tara asked carefully.
Dawn merely bit her lower lip as she nodded.
"And d-do you want to j-just spend time with her?"
Again, Dawn gave a nod, sparing a cursory thought to when she and Buffy had last been on a shopping trip, or to the ice rink, or did anything remotely fun.
"And do you get j-jealous when she's with other people?" Tara continued her questioning.
Dawn looked out of the window, going over her earlier confrontation with Spike. Jealousy? Big check. "Yeah."
Tara nodded again. "Then I think you might be a little gay for her," she said with a kind smile. "But there's nothing wrong with that!" she hurriedly continued. "And you can like boys and girls, too. There are no rules to-"
She immediately snapped her mouth shut as Buffy and Willow came down the stairs. "Tara, honey, is dinner ready yet?" Willow asked cheerfully as she rounded the corner.
"Um… A-almost," Tara smiled, leaning into Willow as the redhead place a kiss on her cheek. "In half an hour…"
"Okay," Buffy piped up, just a little too loudly to sound normal. "I'll go on a quick patrol. If I'm not back in time, could you leave my dinner in the microwave?"
Tara gave a quick affirmative nod, watching the blonde bolt through the backdoor and into the darkness.
"I'm going to do homework in my room," Dawn called from the living room at the same time, racing up the stairs with her bag in hand.
"I just had the weirdest conversation," Willow started slowly.
"Yeah, me too," Tara nodded in agreement.
"Oh boy… Dinner's going to be so awkward…" Willow mused with worried eyes.
"We could always take dinner in our room?" Tara suggested with a smile, pulling Willow closer to her.
"Oh, I do like that idea!" Willow grinned playfully, before giving Tara a quick peck on the lips.
Despite her best intentions, Buffy found herself laying on her back that night, staring up at her ceiling and listening to Dawn's breathing next to her. The moon-lit silhouette beside her told her Dawn was staring up at the ceiling as well.
"Dawn, I have a confession to make," she suddenly blurted.
"Me too," Dawn said immediately.
Buffy winced inwardly. "You go first." Because I'm a chicken, apparently.
"No," Dawn said. "You go first… I actually think that my confession may be… related. To yours, I mean."
Buffy's eyes grew wide in horror. "You mean you know what I was about to say?"
Dawn sighed deeply. "If it has to do with the last two nights, then… yeah."
Buffy quickly flipped onto her stomach, burying her face into her pillow. "Oh god, this is bad. This is very, very bad…"
Dawn forcefully pulled the pillow away from Buffy, rolling her eyes at the dramatics. "Let's just… talk about this, Buffy. Please?"
With a sigh, Buffy rolled back to her previous position, finding herself looking up at Dawn, who was now sitting up. "Or we could not," she grimaced.
"I think we should," Dawn countered with a helpless shrug.
"Ugh, you're right," Buffy eventually admitted.
When the blonde didn't start talking, Dawn figured she would need to take the lead. "So… do you just really like my breasts?" she asked airily, hoping to break the proverbial ice.
Buffy snorted, which was a better reaction than Dawn had expected. "God, Dawn, I'm so sorry about that," she groaned, hand over her eyes. "You must think I'm disgusting…"
Dawn felt her cheeks heating up. "Um… about that… I um… may have put your hand there… But only last night! The first time was all you."
"You did what?!" Buffy practically yelled, and okay, Willow and Tara definitely knew something was going on now.
Rather than showing her embarrassment, Dawn gave a casual shrug. "It felt… nice."
"It felt nice," Buffy repeated, astounded. "It felt nice?!"
"Hey!" Dawn huffed. "You were the first one to… touch me there… You can't blame me for enjoying it!"
"I literally cannot believe we are having this conversation," Buffy sighed, sitting up as well. "So… you were awake last night?"
"Didn't sleep a wink," Dawn confirmed.
Buffy groaned. "So… now what?"
Again, Dawn shrugged. "It's no big deal, right? I mean, it doesn't have to be… I liked it… I'm pretty sure you liked it too-"
"Dawn," Buffy interrupted sternly, "I'm your older sister and your legal guardian."
"I haven't forgotten," Dawn huffed in annoyance. "But no one needs to know, do they?"
"Willow knows," Buffy admitted. "I asked her to- I asked her for advice."
"Tara probably suspects," Dawn added. "I had a nice conversation about gayness with her, and she and Willow probably but one and one together by now… But no one else needs to know."
"We can't do this, Dawn," Buffy sighed against her will.
The blonde was surprised to suddenly feel an unfamiliar weight bearing down on her. She swore she'd only blinked for a split-second, yet somehow Dawn was suddenly straddling her hips. "I love you, Buffy," she husked, and Buffy idly wondered if Dawn had any idea how seductive that sounded.
"I love you too," Buffy spoke softly, "as a sister. That's all this can be, Dawn, and you know it."
Rather than a verbal reply, Dawn lifted her shirt over her head, leaving her astride Buffy's hips in only her shorts.
"God, Dawn, put your shirt back on!" Buffy screeched loudly.
The brunette levelled her with an unimpressed gaze. "Okay, now Willow and Tara definitely know what's going on," she remarked dryly. She put on a small smile before continuing. "I dreamt about you…" she whispered, bending down so her face was closer to Buffy's. "The two of us, being in bed… Your hands exploring…"
"Dawn, you're killing me," Buffy whined pitifully, hands clenched into fists by her side.
"You're making this a lot more difficult than it needs to be," Dawn muttered reasonably. "Is it really so wrong if we both want it?"
"Dawn, there's a word for this-"
"Incest," the young brunette supplied helpfully. "Sounds horrible, doesn't it? Tell me, Buffy," she continued, running her hands lightly up Buffy's arms. "Does this feel horrible?"
They were practically nose to nose, now, and Dawn could feel Buffy's warm breath against her own mouth. Even though she hadn't given it any thought up to this point, she suddenly felt overtaken by the desire to kiss the blonde underneath her.
Deciding that reason and thought could only take her so far, she dipped her head the final inches, planting a soft, innocent kiss on Buffy's soft, pink lips.
"See? Not horrible," she smiled, before frowning. "That wasn't horrible, right? Does my breath smell bad?"
Instead of an answer, Dawn suddenly found the whole world whirling around, and before she knew it she was actually looking up at Buffy, instead of Dawn. "Not horrible," the blonde smiled, fingers moving brown hair aside. "But are you sure about this?"
Dawn could only give a small nod, and it seemed as if a flood broke through the moment she did. Buffy had evidently been holding back her affections, because now she was kissing Dawn like there was no tomorrow. Only a few seconds into the kiss, Dawn felt Buffy's warm tongue licking her lip, and her sister used the resulting gasp to gain entrance into her mouth.
Dawn had fantasised about situations like these from time to time. They had always been centered around boys, though, usually people from her class. None of those fantasies lived up to this moment with her sister. Dawn couldn't imagine ever feeling this loved by anyone else.
She quickly urged Buffy's hands onwards as they started exploring her stomach, pulling them upwards and hiking her shirt along in the process. She felt her nipples stiffen in the cold air, and couldn't suppress the moan that escaped her throat when Buffy's hands came to cover her breasts, gently kneading and squeezing.
Suddenly overcome with a desire to explore as well, she allowed her hands to mirror her sister's, testing the unfamiliar weight of Buffy's larger breasts in her hands, and smiling at the groan the blonde released at the sound.
She smiled into their kiss as she felt Buffy's hand skimming downwards, over her stomach, fingers coming to rest at the waistband of her shorts again. "Déjà vu," she grinned when they parted for air. "Going to run away again?"
Buffy smiled back at her. "I'm not going anywhere, unless you ask me to."
Giving her sister her best puppy-dog-eyes and pouty-face, Dawn blinked innocently. "Would you please move your hand a little lower, then?"
Moving their lips together again, Buffy complied with Dawn's request. Her hand slipped underneath the waistband of her shorts and panties with ease, and Dawn gasped audible as soft, determined fingers slid through her wetness.
Mind clouded by emotions and feelings Dawn never even imagined before, she barely managed to muster up enough of a thought-process to lift her leg up, pressing her thigh in between Buffy's, earning her a soft, whimpering moan.
Buffy's fingers quickly found a rhythm, deftly moving over Dawn's most sensitive spot, and it wasn't long before the younger girl felt a somewhat familiar feeling building low in her stomach. She wasn't entirely innocent, and she definitely knew what was going to happen.
"B-Buffy, don't stop," she panted heavily, releasing one of Buffy's breasts in favour of grabbing her hip. "I'm… so close."
Buffy pulled back from their kiss, looking down at her with lust-filled eyes. Despite their lustful haze, however, Dawn also recognized the unmistakable emotion behind it. Love was something Buffy's eyes held in spades, and she could feel that love with every stroke of the blonde's fingers.
Three more strokes of her sister's fingers made little lights explode behind Dawn's now-closed eyelids, back arching off of the bed, and a loud moan ripping free from her chest. When she relaxed again, still panting and skin damp from exertion, Buffy was still grinding down on her thigh.
"I love you," Dawn murmured under her breath, pulling Buffy sideways so she was laying on the mattress again. "I love you so much."
To match her actions to her words, she gently pulled Buffy's shorts down, looking up in alarm as Buffy grabbed her wrist. "Dawn," the blonde muttered with a frown, "you don't-"
"I want to," the brunette quickly clarified. "Please let me have this?"
There was still a fair amount of doubt in Buffy's eyes, and Dawn couldn't really blame her older sister for that. After all, most people would consider what they were doing to be horrible, dastardly, vile, unethical… Not to mention unlawful.
Still, the blonde relinquished her hold on Dawn's wrist, allowing her younger sister to remove her panties as well. For a brief moment, Dawn looked down at her sister's center beneath her, glistening in the moonlight.
"I'm not getting any younger here," Buffy chided playfully after a long moment of staring.
"Sorry," Dawn laughed nervously. "I just… It's… I've never done this before."
"Neither have I," Buffy smiled.
"I meant," Dawn stuttered, "at all. Ever."
"I'd hope not," Buffy snorted. "I'd hate to have to shoot anyone with my crossbow."
"Just yourself," Dawn smiled as she nuzzled her nose against Buffy's cheek. "But please don't," she continued, fingers slipping further downwards and sliding through Buffy's wet heat. "Tell me how?"
Buffy looked up at her adoringly. "Just do what you would do to yourself." After a moment, her eyes widened. "Have you ever…?"
"Yeah," Dawn nodded quickly, fingers seeking out Buffy's entrance. As the tips teased against her sister's opening, the blonde released an anxious mewl, spurring the brunette onwards. With two fingers slowly moving in and out, and the mouse of her hand pressing against the sensitive bundle of nerves, Buffy's breathing became increasingly laboured, until all her muscles stiffened, and Dawn could feel her pulsing around her fingers.
"Wow," she chuckled after the tension left Buffy's body and she removed her fingers. "You're… really loud."
Buffy's blush only made Dawn want to kiss her more – not out of love, but just because she looked so sweet like that. "What are the odds Willow and Tara didn't hear us?" Buffy winced.
Dawn pretended to think for a moment. "Well, considering the fact that they are in the next room, I'd say somewhere below nothing."
She rolled off Buffy, grabbing the comforter and pulling it up over them. She smiled as she felt the blonde sidle up against her back, placing them in the position they'd been sleeping in for the past few nights.
With a huff, the younger sister picked up the hand that loosely dangled in front of her stomach, dragging it upwards and putting it on her breast again. "And so we end up at the beginning," she murmured softly.
"No running away this time," Buffy muttered in agreement.
"Can we do this again? I mean, not now… Just… Can we?"
She felt Buffy nodding against her back. "We need to be careful… We can't let people find out about… this. Whatever this is…"
"Buffy?" Dawn asked, insecurity suddenly sweeping over her like a tidal wave.
"Yes, Dawnie?"
"Was this… Did we… I mean… Ugh. Do you love me?"
"More than anything," the blonde responded without missing a beat.
"I mean," Dawn started again, before rolling her eyes at her own stammering. "I know you love me, because you're my sister," she explained. "But… I'm pretty sure I feel about you how Willow feels about Tara…"
Buffy hummed into her hair, her hand giving a soft, playful squeeze at her breast. "And I'm pretty sure I feel about you how Tara feels about Willow…"
When they made their way into the kitchen the following morning, Tara and Willow were already up and preparing breakfast, standing in front of the stove in a loose embrace. They turned around at the sound of entering footsteps.
"At least they're both smiling," Dawn muttered softly enough that only Buffy could hear it.
Buffy hummed in acknowledgment. "Morning," she said around a fake yawn.
"Sleep well?" Willow asked innocently, although the continuous smiling was more than a little suspicious.
"Um, yeah," Buffy nodded slowly, seeing Dawn mirror the movement next to her. "Listen… whatever you heard last night-"
"I didn't hear anything last night," Tara interrupted, flipping one of the pancakes. "Willow, did you hear anything last night?"
"Nope," Willow chirped happily, pouring milk in four glasses. "Was there something I should have heard?"
"No," Dawn and Buffy both responded at the same time, before glaring at each other for responding too eagerly.
The scene resulted in the four of them sharing a brief bout of laughter. When everyone had sobered up again, Buffy looked at the two witches. "Thanks, guys…"
Willow gave a mock salute. "You can count on us to be deaf every night."
In an uncharacteristic bout of courage, Tara continued. "And afternoons and mornings, too, should the need arise."
"Too bad I can't tell Spike about the development in my love life," Buffy mused. "I bet that would get him to back off."
"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," Tara smiled as she slid a pancake on Dawn's plate.
"Hm? Why's that?"
"Didn't you hear?" Tara laughed, looking at Dawn. "Your sister scared him off…"
"Dawn," Buffy started, in what Dawn called her 'mom-voice.' "What did you do?"
"I threatened to set him on fire while he was asleep."
"You did what?!"
I was sixteen or seventeen when I wrote this. I sort of have mixed feelings about it now. Somehow, I manage to be proud of it, while still feeling more than a little awkward about it. I realise this story isn't everyone's cup of tea, but here it is anyway…