People say I'm crazy.
Is it crazy to love someone.
Is it insane to want them to love me back.
People say to me; 'Why did you do it Harley? You had such a brilliant future.'
They don't know what it was like. My whole life was planned out. Structured. Gymnastics school. Never an empty moment.
Is it so strange for me to want a change.
A girl gets tired of order. Is it any wonder I turned to chaos.
People think that because I'm with Mistah J. That I'm an idiot.
I did go to college ya know. Even if not all my work was in the classroom.
I know that my relationship is unhealthy. I know that I'm not number one in Mistah J's life. I know that he'd kill me as easy as breathing.
It's just easier to pretend that he does. Easier to belive he doesn't MEAN it when he hits me. Even if it isn't true.
So I smile and laugh. Because Mistah J's right. It's all a joke.
So I might as well smile for Puddin.
Tommorrow I'll forget I even thought this. I'll smile and laugh and go back to believing those lies I tell myself.
But he beat me up real bad today. Then left me behind at a heist. Things like that make even a girl like me face facts.
He doesn't love me.
But tommorrow I'll smile and pretend he does. It's easier that way. At least with Puddin I know what I am.
I'm a harlequinn.
But even harlequinns cry when the curtain comes down.