Loki was a quiet child. Since childhood both he and his brother Thor had been made aware of their royal heritage. Their father Odin said that both were equally worthy of the throne, but that only one could be king. Young Thor's ambitions were set on friendships and games; to him the future was vague and distant. But even as a child Loki saw actions in light of the future. He began gathering knowledge on kingship and responsibility, watching, listening, and compiling all that he experienced into a standard. As he grew, he measured those who held power against this standard and calculated the effectiveness of their rule.
The brothers were close, but nearing adolescence things began to change. New friends entered the scene. Outgoing Thor won companions by breathing, while introverted Loki was content with the company of his books. As Thor was ingratiated into new circles, though, a strain of loneliness touched his brother. His best friend was drifting away into territory Loki could not approach or understand. The loneliness became bitter.
That bitterness was compounded by another factor. Thor was always more physically imposing, but Loki's speed and tactics had balanced out. As they matured, this disparity also grew. Thor loved sparring and insisted on matches. Loki continually lost, and they became irritated with each other. Thor couldn't understand why his brother didn't want to play as they had used to, and Loki hated being constantly overwhelmed in a game he couldn't win. He began to abandon the social sphere and turn his focus on academics.
As Thor watched his brother pull away he began to panic. He started trying to bring him back, but lack of understanding drove them even further apart. He communicated in the way he knew best, the way he communicated affection with his friends—playful violence and insult, dragging him into activities. Loki began to dread the forced integration and Thor was stung by his seeming coldness. Neither were able to sort out themselves, let alone each other, through the already tumultuous time.
Hurt and sadness simmered into frustration. Loki channeled it into books and study and was content. However, warm-hearted and impulsive Thor lacked an equivalent coping device. The outlet of his sorrow became scorn and insult. Loki showed no outward signs and indeed thought he wasn't bothered, but a spark of sadness remained unnoticed deep inside.
Reputations were built. Changes began to develop in the brothers' temperament. Thor became the golden child of the palace, became proud of his increasing accomplishments. The pride became arrogance and the arrogance was coddled by their parents. Loki looked at the society around him and deemed it shallow. He became afflicted with an arrogance of a different kind, a cold aloofness. This drove Thor further away and hardened the bitterness towards his brother, exacerbating Loki's alienation.
As they continued to age Thor became involved in drink and revelry. Loki retreated further into scholarship, radiating silent disdain. In their attempts to cope both had made themselves into the caricature the other most abhorred. Thor's bitter resentment became harassment. It was around this time that Frigga stepped in. She took Loki beneath her wing and trained him in her magic. Also around this time, the brothers were brought together for the next step of their education. Odin took them on a survey of the Nine Realms. During this trip and the time that followed, Loki saw something worrying in his brother.
Thor was undefeated, impulsive and motivated by adrenaline; a deadly combination in a would-be king. His tactic was to attack first and create a plan later. Unfortunately, he usually won. The imminent failure of that strategy would bring massive bloodshed. As this pattern was seen again and again in training matches, classes, exercises, excursions, even peace-keeping missions around the Realms, Loki grew nervous. For the first time in a long time he reached out to his brother. Thor was at first joyed, then angry. He was offended that Loki's first words after such a time should be of correction. The advice went unheeded.
Loki and Frigga grew closer as she taught him. He confided in her, and she helped him see his hypocrisy and the depth of his arrogance. It was difficult, but through the lens she provided he began attempting to change. Ashamed of how he had acted, he extended a tentative hand to his brother once more—but Thor had chosen a different path. Now beloved, honored as hero, practically worshiped by his friends, he was caught up in stardom. The arrogance grew. So did his strength, so did the adoration of the public; so to re-double his ego again. Reconciliation was irrelevant to his new life. Loki felt the coldness of a turned back.
He continued his studies and became a powerful magician, a brilliant tactician. His mother taught him to use his speed and agility as a platform against bigger opponents. Alone save for his mother, he spent much time exploring, sometimes disappearing for days on end. He found portals that formed shortcuts between Realms.
On a fateful day his exploration led him to a village in the remote edges of Asgard. It was destroyed. The houses were punctured with gaping holes, as if massive stakes had driven through ceilings and walls. There was standing water, also; though it hadn't rained, wasn't by the sea. There was blood, too—here and there, not much. Scraps of clothing. No other signs. Loki hurried back to the fortress and reported to the guards. He asked all-seeing Heimdall what had happened. Heimdall was silent. They had an increasingly heated conflict, which Heimdall ended by declaring any information he might have was exclusively for the king. Loki went to Odin. Here, too, he was met with half-answers and dismissed. Stung and frustrated, Loki returned to his room and puzzled.
That night, as Loki worked through what he'd seen, Thor burst in. He reeked of alcohol and staggered into furniture before slamming his fists on the table beside him. He was crying. He grabbed Loki and accused him of abandonment. He shook him and yelled about how he'd left and betrayed him; decades of smothered sorrow gushing to light. He grew angrier as he went and his already erratic behavior grew more violent. Loki tried to disengage, but Thor was beyond reason. They fought and crashed to the ground. The attack stopped here, though. Thor sat up, crushed him in a hug and sobbed on his shoulder. Guards entered, having heard the ruckus. Loki shook his head. They left. It was uncomfortable and foreign, but he bore with it; after a minute or so he patted his exhausted brother's shoulder and half-carried him to his room.
The next day Thor invited him on an excursion. The old dread cropped up, but another feeling crept in alongside. Guilt? Guilt, that he should still feel so little after his brother had exposed his heart. This was the last chance for this season in life. If he turned him down now, he might never come back. Loki decided to pretend the feelings were there, and perhaps they—or an understanding—would follow. He went with Thor.
Thor took him to a place where they had gone fishing as boys. He'd always hated fishing, but Loki had enjoyed it. He confessed that he'd behaved in a difficult way and asked for Loki's forgiveness, said he hoped to rebuild their friendship. Loki accepted the apology but offered a disclaimer. He told him that he wasn't being spiteful—he just didn't interact the same way that others did. Thor seemed to understand. He was optimistic, but Loki had a sinking feeling.
The following days were strained. Distrust of Odin brought on by the wrecked village; playing a charade for the sake of his brother. Thor brought Loki into his circle of friends. Introverted and not prone to small-talk or niceties, Loki was painfully out of place. Gradually, though, he began reading the patterns of interaction. For his brother's sake he tried to adopt them, forcing down flares of indignation. Empty chatter, niceties and erratic outbursts were apparently the keys to maintaining his relationship with his brother.
He made it back to the site of the wrecked village soon after. It was gone—hidden under a spell. He used his mother's training to undo the barrier; but the spell had a built-in trap. He was struck unconscious and awoke in a cell. There were raised voices, and then his mother came and released him. She silenced any attempts at questioning and begged him not to confront Odin. He did anyway, and was silenced by him as well.
Meanwhile, Thor's group began to accept him. Thorny disdain returned. It wasn't him they accepted; it was his mask of meaningless sound. So devoid of substance, so shallow, so crass! They didn't care about the world outside of their petty circle. His mask became a caricature. A schism widened between his true feelings and his desires of reconciliation, and that hated mask rubbed both aspects raw. Thor picked up on the currents of animosity. Confusion and frustration returned as he tried to find and address the problem, but each attempt at the finding the truth brought him to another mask. His trying to sort it only made things worse. A second falling-out approached.
Everything ground to a halt when Loki met Sif...
Continued in Prologue Part 2: This Glorious Son of Asgard