The inspiration behind this was from personal experience - so I apologize if it's out of character or anything like that. I just needed to get this out of my system. It had been build up for a very long time.
Warning - Character Death. But please give it a chance.
- MT.
"I don't want them to know." She stared longingly at the beer that she held between two palms.
"They need to know."
"Not now. Not until it's time." She took a deep breath before swigging from the bottle of Blue Moon. "Promise me you won't say a word, Maura."
You nodded and sit next to your best friend. "I don't like it, but I won't say anything until you're ready."
"I knew it would be bad, but I didn't realize exactly how bad." She whispered to you as she lifts the oxygen mask from her face.
"Leave it on, please." You hate how fragile your voice is.
"I wrote you a letter," She mumbles through the mask, at least she is listening to you for now. "I want you to read it when I'm gone."
You nod as tears fall from your eyes, you curse yourself for being weak in front of her when she needs you to be so strong, but you know her and she knows you, and in this moment you both know what is happening. You're watching your best friend die. She's allowing only you to be there. You're her confidant, and she is yours.
That was yesterday.
It had been exactly four months to the day that Detective Jane Rizzoli was diagnosed with stage 4 Breast Cancer that had travelled into her liver, lungs, and bones. Two months and three days since she handed in her gun and badge; being forced into early retirement. Two months and two days since her parents and brothers had been informed that their daughter and sister had been dealt a deathly diagnosis. Two months and one day since Angela had begged you to "pull strings" in any direction possible for her Janie to get treatment, and it had been that night that you and Jane sat down and explained that there was no treatment available, that even if there was, it wouldn't work; not with the cancer this advanced, this wide spread.
21 days ago Jane and Jo Friday had moved into your spare bedroom, and 19 days had passed since you took an indefinite leave of absence from a career you love so much to care for your best friend whom you love so much more. 12 days since Red Sox were series champions, and 11 days since she collapsed in your bathroom with exhaustion.
One week ago she had been admitted to the hospital, and 5 days ago released into your care. Three days ago she lost control of her bladder and bowel; she became frustrated and found the strength to smash the mirror in your bathroom. You helped clean her up and then you held her close; and the moment you knew she was asleep was the moment you broke down into tears and prayed that these last four months had been nothing but a cruel dream.
Two days ago she began to refuse food and water, and when she slept, which was always, it was hard to wake her up. You knew what was coming and nothing could ever prepare you for that moment.
You hadn't heard her voice in 15 hours and all she had done was sleep. Her fingers and toes were blue in color and cold to touch. You sat by her bed and held her hands in yours and rubbed your fingers over those scars of purple that showed a life of courage and strength. Those few minutes before she was taken away her breathing rattled and gurgled with every last gasp. And you were there holding her hand the moment her heart had finally stopped beating.
You held her mother while she sobbed and screamed, and watched as her brothers sat shocked in your lounge room, not uttering a single word to each other. Jo Friday barked as her body was wheeled from your house in a black bag that should never have ever been graced with the body of Jane Rizzoli.
Five days since she passed was the day of her funeral, and that night you slipped away from the chaos with the letter in your hand from the now missing link in your life.
You sat with Jo on the bench outside your kitchen door and focused on your breathing as you slowly opened a letter written to you.
My beautiful Maura,
I've started this letter too many times to count. Some copies were long, agonizingly long.
Thank you for being the best person to ever enter my life. Thank you for your laughter, your care, your presence, and the safety you provided.
Please know that I will always be looking over you. Every single day and night. And when you need me, just look up into the sky and I'll be there. I swear to god I will be there.
Never lose contact with my family, my Ma will need you, and so will the guys. And you will need them. I know you will.
Take care of Jo for me, and give Bass a strawberry.
Never date a Yankee, and never forget how much I loved you from the moment I met you.
Love always and forever,
Your Jane x
You held the letter close to you and looked up into the sky that now was home to the greatest person you had ever met; you closed your eyes and prayed to Jane.
"I love you and I miss you."
Seven words you knew from this moment on would be the last words you would speak every night for the rest of your life.
Reviews both good and bad would be lovely.
x
