How Can I Save Thee? Let Me Count the Ways.
by K.M. Redselig
Summary: Behold! A "Save Goatbro" poem. With profuse apologies to Shakespeare, Yeats, Dr. Seuss, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and probably many others.
(Update 12/16: Some slight changes made.)
The barrier was gone, the monsters were free
Things seemed as happy as they could be
The monsters rejoiced at their new beginnings
The players felt, too, that they were winning
But there was one character they just couldn't save
He had no soul, was the reason he gave
Since for his real form, he lacked the power
He would soon again become a flower
Some wanted to say, it shouldn't be this way
We'll find you your soul, and you can come up and stay
But the stubborn little guy just refused to come
So a good many players felt quite glum
Right there, many would agree
Asriel, we hardly knew ye!
Many felt he should be pardoned
Still, he stayed there in that garden
But things just aren't the same without him
People will still talk about him
They still wonder to this day
If, perhaps, there is a way
Some say he could feel whole
If Frisk gave him their own soul
Taking this at a first glance
He could get a second chance
Or it could be worth a shot
If you put him in a pot
Could you help him find himself
While he's sitting on a shelf?
Another way that we have seen
Is to get a time machine
To travel back to long ago
And find his soul seems apropos
If you were to contact Gaster
Could that fix things any faster?
What if he who speaks in hands
Could help you realize your plans?
Are there other ways to get a soul?
Other ways to reach this goal?
Could you get one in the rain?
Could you get one on a train?
Could the humans bring him back?
Could you call a medevac?
Could a search and rescue crew
Go down there and help him, too?
That's likely why this has been trending
How can this be the happiest ending?
That would be said by finsters and foozlers
And bollywaggers and crimstons and woozlers
Determination
It could solve every problem
Except for this one
Anime is real
But a soul is also real
Things could be better
What's with these haikus?
They do not fit here at all
Self-cleaning oven
But why should not those players be mad?
Some have known a happy lad
Who, upon completing a pacifist run
Thought the ending was no fun
What light through yonder ruins breaks?
It is up above, reaching down below
Where somebody has no soul
And none but fools think there is no hope
This poem might be kind of sappy
But couldn't everyone be happy?
If one were to take a vote
Many would save the little goat
If caring about this sounds insane
I paid ten dollars for this game
How could one not feel hurt
Not to get one's money's worth?
Perhaps someday, things will be different
There are no words that rhyme with "different"
As for now, things feel unfinished
Will all our hopes and dreams diminish?