Akatsuki Thanksgiving

This is the second story in my Akatsuki holiday series. Get ready for Thanksgiving Akatsuki style! Enjoy! Much Love, AkiraDawn

I don't own Naruto or any of its characters

By the way, I would suggest consulting the Brooklyn Translation Guide at the bottom of the page when you get to the part where you meet Deidara's mother. You may have trouble following her at first

Some Background…

Two weeks before Thanksgiving Deidara's mother while in conversation with her beloved son, invited the Akatsuki gang to Deidara's childhood home in Iwagakure for a lovely Thanksgiving dinner. Akatsuki would finally learn more about Deidara and his family…and why Deidara was the way he was.

"Oh my god! I can't wait, yeah! We're going to be at my house soon and you get to meet my mom, yeah! And you will even get to meet my dad, yeah!" Deidara was so excited about going home for Thanksgiving. Everyone was a little nervous about meeting Deidara's family except Sasori who had already met Deidara's mother and Itachi who had met Deidara's mother. And what made everyone else even more nervous was the fact that they were now in Iwagakure: The Miami Beach of the ninja countries, where everyone was beautiful, thin, fabulously built, and filthy rich.

"Deidara why didn't you warn us that everyone here in Iwagakure would lower our self esteems drastically?" Kisame asked.

"What do you mean Kisame, yeah?"

"Nevermind…just tell us when we're at your house." Kisame was suddenly self conscious. The shuttle bus everyone was on came to a halt.

"Come on this is our stop, yeah!" Deidara exclaimed and hurried toward the front of the bus. Everyone else filed off behind him. Kakuzu was completely freaking out because he didn't do well around attractive people…and right now he was surrounded by them. After a brief walk, they had approached Deidara's childhood home. Music was blasting from the inside, it sounded like the Bay City Roller's Classic 1970's hit "Hot Child in the City"…and it was. Deidara banged on the door. Dana answered it.

"Oh my god, you're like so here, yeah! Happy Thanksgiving baby brother, yeah!" And Deidara and Dana were now having their brother/sister hugging moment. Everyone poured into the Stone country residence although the Bay City Rollers was still blaring.

"MOM! MOM DEIDARA'S HERE, YEAH! TURN THAT DOWN, YEAH!" Deidara's mother spun around and turned the music down. Kisame's eyes nearly popped out of his head and Kakuzu turned as white as a sheet. Deidara's mother was wearing a very short skirt with 4 inch high heels, an apron over the skirt and brilliantly low cut loose fitting blouse with dangly, trendy bead necklaces that hung nearly as low as the blouse was cut…she was the most beautiful mother there ever was and not a day over 40. Not to mention she too was a natural blonde.

"Deidara! Baby! Aaaww, my baby boy, yeah." She hugged Deidara. "I'm so glad yuh little friends could come with yuh. Make yuh-selves at home boys, I'll have dinnuh ready here in a bit, yeah. Oh! Deidara yuh fahthuh is comin' in on the next flight he can get from Milano, yeah." Deidara's mother had a very thick East Brooklyn accent.

"Milano?" Zetsu asked Sasori. "As in Milano Italy?"

"Dude, you didn't know? Deidara's father is Italian, and this lovely lady you see before you, she's from Brooklyn, New York." Sasori had a thing for Deidara's mother, maybe because Deidara's mother's favorite movie was "Breakfast at Tiffany's" or maybe it was because Deidara's mother was well…let's just say that everytime Sasori was around Deidara's mother he always sang the song 'Stacey's Mom' only he changed some of the words.

No one had seemed to notice that Itachi had pulled Dana into a pretty hot kiss on the couch, well no one noticed until Deidara's mother, who's name is Diana, needed her daughter.

"Dana, baby, come help yuh muhthuh with this damn turkey, yeah." Diana had a huge turkey to take out of the oven. Kakuzu had passed out on the floor because he was surrounded by too many beautiful people.

"Hey Dana, you're not wearing much in this picture." Kisame said, noticing a framed photo of a womanly form wrapped only in a scarf.

"Oh Kisame, that's so not me, that's mom when she was like 18, yeah." Dana answered. Yes, Deidara's mother had been and still was….a model. Kisame swallowed hard, he wasn't expecting that answer.

"Mrs. Deidara's mom….if you don't mind me asking….how old were you when you had your children?" Kisame asked. The turkey was flopped onto the kitchen table.

"Oh! Yeah, you muthafuckuh turkey, that'll teach yuh to mess with Diana and her baby girl, yeah! Oh, sorry Kisame, it's just that the turkey was bein' a reguluh bitch, yeah. Let's see I met Deidara's fahthuh Dominik when I was 17….I had Dana when I was 18 and Deidara when I was 20." She answered quickly searching for a pack of cigarettes.

"I'm sorry boys, I don't typically smoke but that turkey has stressed me the hell out all morning, yeah….Hey….why's yuh little friend passed out on the floor, yeah?" Beautiful Diana asked.

"Diana, Kakuzu can't stand to be around a woman like you." Diana laughed as she took a drag on her cigarette.

"Oh, Sasori…you're such a ladykilluh…just like a modern day Humphrey Bogart, yeah." The truth was Sasori was actually a few years older than Diedara's mother, he wished she wasn't crazy about her gorgeous husband.

"Oh! my god…check this out, Hidan." Zetsu was looking at an autographed photo on the wall. It read: You'll always be the blonde toy I can never have…Love Gianni Versace.

"Deidara….when did you EVER meet Gianni Versace?" Zetsu asked.

"I've never met Gianni Versace, yeah. But I'd like to." Deidara said, his blue eyes saddening at the thought of not meeting Gianni Versace.

"Oh….my….god….then that means….." Hidan cut Kakuzu off.

"The dreamy blonde in this picture with the long hair and the face framing layers and natural highlights is none other than…..Deidara's father…the man who is responsible for transferring his DNA and producing a son…that became Deidara….seriously?" Hidan said. Zetsu shook his head yes. "God, no wonder Deidara turned out so pretty, he had good genes to work with, really." Hidan said. It was true; Deidara looked just like his beautiful Italian father. At this point, dinner was ready and Diana had removed her apron in order to be dressed more appropriately for dinner.

"I hope you boys drink White Russians, yeah." And so Diana, the intriguing mother of Deidara and Dana began to pour/mix White Russians and sit them at the table…We have the pilgrims to thank for this feast in which everyone was about to eat.

Brooklyn Translation Guide:

ya translation: you/your

dinnuh translation: dinner

fahthuh translation: father

muhthuh translation: mother

ladykilluh translation: lady-killer