What's it like to have no friends

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

First day of kindergarten

It was Makoto's mother who dropped them off. Asking at the gate if the two were okay. Haru simply nodded. Makoto was a bit more eloquent, smiling brightly and saying, "I am with Haru-chan! So I'll be okay!"

Haru could tell the smile was forced. Makoto was nervous. Frankly, Haru was too. He didn't get why they had to come to this 'kindergarten' place. Both their parents had assured the two that kindergarten was going to be fun and that they were going to make a lot of new friends. Fun and friends had been enough of a promise to make Makoto a bit excited. Haru just thought it would be noisy, like it was when they went to the park sometimes and encountered kids other than themselves. Haru was happy with just Makoto. But Makoto was also able to get along with the loud, pushy kids at the park as well. He'll probably get along with all the kids here…

Haru's steps faltered for a brief second but Makoto reacted instantly, "What's wrong, Haru-can?"

Haru didn't know how to voice his feelings. If only because he didn't really know what he was feeling. It was like being scared but not exactly. It was more that Haru thought something bad was going to happen. "Haru-chan?" Makoto prompted. Haru still couldn't voice his feelings.

Makoto seemed to know what was going through Haru's mind nonetheless. Because he smiled brightly and said, "Don't worry Haru-chan! If the other kids get too noisy or too pushy, we'll just get away and play by ourselves. Like we always do."

Haru nodded. That's what he liked about Makoto. Haru didn't have to speak. Makoto understood and Makoto would be his friend forever.

First day of elementary school

They weren't supposed to hold hands anymore. Haru didn't really understand why they couldn't but apparently boys didn't hold hands when they got to 1st grade. Holding hands was just for kindergarteners and maybe girls. Most of the girls weren't holding hands either. Haru missed holding Makoto's hand.

"I wonder if we'll be in the same class, Haru-chan," said Makoto, his tone betraying some of his apprehension.

Haru tried to be nonchalant, "We'll find out soon enough," he replied but Haru hoped he was in the same class as Makoto. The thought of facing a new school without Makoto filled him with dread. Haru had been forced to let go of Makoto's hand but for now, that was all Haru was willing to let go off.

First day of Middle School

"Ah! We are not in the same class," Makoto noted sadly as he and Haru read their names off the notice board.

Haru said nothing. It wouldn't be the the first time they were separated. They had spent their 3rd and 5th year of elementary school apart. All it had meant was that Haru spent a lot of time during the school day in quiet solitude, only being able to see Makoto during breaks. At which time Haru would be bursting with words and often talking more than Makoto, which was a rarity. It wasn't ideal but they could cope.

"We'll see each other during lunch breaks and before and after school," Haru pointed out, as he started to move into the coping phase.

"Yeah, I guess," Makoto replied, his voice infinitesimal sadder. Only Haru with his years and years and years of Makoto training could have picked it up.

"Makoto?" he prompted.

Makoto forced a smile, "Let's get to our classes Haru-chan!" he declared, effectively dodging Haru's question, "We don't want to be late on our first day! Ah, I hope I get to sit near some nice people," Makoto said, "I also hope we find a good spot for lunch. Hey Haru, what did you bring for lunch?" and with such trivial banter Makoto filled the rest of the time they had together before they had to separate for class.

First day of High School

"We are in the same class!" Makoto declared, somewhat unnecessarily since Haru was looking at the same notice board as Makoto.

"Good," was the only reply Haru offered. It would be good to start high school being in the same class as Makoto and with any luck, he'll be able to stay with Makoto for the rest of high school.

Plane Back to Japan

Haru jerked awake and started to hyperventilating a little. "Haru!" cried Rin, thankfully he wasn't asleep but awake and watching a movie, "Are you alright?"

"What's it like to have no friends?" Haru asked suddenly.

"What?" Rin sounded phased and a bit hurt.

"You didn't have any friends when you moved to Iwatobi right?" Haru pointed out, "Even Yamazaki you didn't know," Haru paused, "Always. There was a beginning. There was a time before Yamazaki. Then you moved to Australia and started afresh. You didn't have any friends in your Australian high school, right? So you know, what's it like to not have friends!"

"Haru…" Rin didn't know what to say.

"I have always had Makoto! There was no beginning for us. We met as babies. Before memory, before we had any concept of self we met and have been friends. We have always been together but now," Haru fought hard to not tear-up, "Now he's leaving me! We won't be together anymore…"

"Haru," Rin started, "I," Rin sighed, "I don't think Makoto wants to separate from you. It's a big change. Going to college is a big step in and of itself but Makoto is also moving. Sosuke and I have already grown used to leaving apart from our families. But I still remember how hard it was and I actually tried to ease into it by moving in with my grandmother for a bit."

There was a pause as Rin gathered his thoughts that Haru saw no need to fill. After a moment Rin continued, "I am sure, Makoto wants you by his side and you should be sure of that too. I mean, you too can read each others minds can't you? Maybe its not 100% but it's 95% right? That's high enough to know if he wants you by his side or not. If he wants you by his side and you want to remain by his side then I am sure you two can make it happen. No, I should say you can make it happen. You, Nanase Haruka, you can do whatever you set your mind to. That's what I have always envied about you," Rin added with a smirk.

Haru said nothing. He was still discontent. It wasn't just about taking the necessary steps to be with Makoto, which would mean going to a university in Tokyo. That part was easy. The hard part was what came first. He had been so mean to Makoto. Haru wouldn't be surprised if Makoto never spoke to him ever again! Haru was honestly beginning to dread the moment the plane touched down in Tokyo.

Tokyo Narita Airport

Haru should have known, that he was worrying for nothing, "Welcome home," and with those two words, Makoto took away all Haru's worry and made him resolve to not find out what's it like to have no friends.

Author's Note: It's been confirmed multiple times that Makoto and Haru met as babies. The most latest came from their interview as part of volume #7. To quote,

- Well then, first thing first, please tell us how you met each other.

Makoto: Well… Haru and I are childhood friends, and our homes are really close to each other, so it's like we've been together since the very beginning.

Haruka: I can't remember something that long ago.

Makoto: But if you must know, I think our first encounter was when we were 0 years old. We have photos from that time in our family albums.

Haruka: …like I'd remember.

Makoto: That's true lol.

So basically this story was born when I realised that unlike most of us, Makoto and Haru have always had a built-in friend when they started kindergarten, elementary school, middle and/or high school. At most they were in different classes but that's about it!