Author's Note: Hey there, again. So, this can be a one-shot if that's what you want. It's all up to you; tell me if ya want another chapter. It will come.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything ya recognize, y'all know that.

Warning: Only two straight couples (well, I can't make an innocent Renesmee yuri, can I? Nor can I make her Rose's kid if Rosalie's yuri, now can I?), massive, MASSIVE, non-canon pairings, a pissed Rosalie, etc… Oh, and UKEROTH!! XD

Pairings: There are 8; I'll put this in the end, in case anyone's confused. Though I don't think anyone will be.

The day was bright; too bright for anyone (any-vampire, that is) to be outside. Alice sat in the living room, reading – ironically – Breaking Dawn, by Stephenie Meyer. She was just getting to the part where her soul mate was discovering her state of pregnancy when Renesmee came in, muttering something along the lines of "Damn these braces", but worse.

"Nessie, language!" chided Alice. "And who taught you that word?"

Said half-vampire peered up at her innocently, eyes going wide.

"Draco did! Auntie Ally, what do you when you get a toothache?" her aunt frowned.

"I think you try to distract yourself, dearie. Why don't you go ask your dad for a Blood Pop? Your eyes are black." Nessie nodded, then ran off. Alice called Rosalie, who appeared beside in two minutes, not in a really good mood, as she'd been in the middle of hunting.

"What?" the Seer smirked.

"Guess what Draco taught your daughter?" and she uttered the obscenity that her niece had used.

The blonde growled. "MALFOY!!!"

Carlisle perched on the counter and watched as Esme bustled in the kitchen, cooking up feast –literally- for her lover, Sephiroth, Harry, Draco, Cloud, Zack and Ciel for dinner.

Footsteps echoed, approaching rapidly. Draco sprinted in and promptly lunged into his mate's arms, transforming into a cute little ferret in midair and landing right into Carlisle's hands.

"Hide me!"

And then Rosalie was stomping in. "Come out, you piece of – hey Carlisle, hey Esme." The former cocked his head: "What'd he do now?"

But it wasn't Rose who answered. Harry sighed, appearing behind his wife to calm her down.

"He taught Renesmee a swear word."

Carlisle immediately tapped ferret-Draco between the eyes.

"Oi!"

"Punishment."

Jasper lunged within Edward's embrace, the glittering – literally – couple relaxing in the sunlight coming in through the window in Edward's room. There was a knock on the door, and without waiting for an answer, their niece walked in, Blood Pop in mouth. She handed another one to each of them, which they took gratefully.

"My teeth #$%^&*-ing hurt." Her uncles didn't even blink at the word; Rosalie downstairs had been loud enough. Draco was a dead ferret.

"Braces?" at the girl's nod, Jasper said, "It'll pass. How 'bout you go find Jake?" the four-year-old nodded, and disappeared.

Edward claimed his Fated's lips – and later, the rest of him, but that's another story – as soon as the door clicked shut.

Thank the wizarding world for Silencio.

*

Bella poked at a pretty flower Yuffie had just transplanted on the border of Edward's meadow.

"This is a surprise for Esme?" Yuffie nodded.

"Yeah! Not a word, 'kay?"

"… 'kay." Just then Renesmee zipped past.

"No, sorry dearie! Try asking Billy!" Bella called after her. Then she turned back o the hyper girl.

"How'd you get them pots here without her knowing?"

Esme's lover grinned, shrugged and continued her gardening.

*

Sephiroth was curled on the sofa, head on Emmett's lap, dozing lightly, when –

"SEBAAAAAAAASTIEEEEEEEN!!!" Cloud's voice was very loudly heard through the wall, and Seph abruptly disappeared from the room. There was a bang as he kicked the door, hard.

"Scream once more, I WILL KILL YOU!" Em raised an eyebrow as his silver haired uke stompied back, Masamune in hand, muttering about noisy, vocal blonds. He'd distinctly heard an 'eep' from the next room over.

Wow.

Zack sneaked up behind Ciel and hugged him suddenly, wrapping his arms around the 16*-year-old Phantomhive's waist.

"Pedophile!" said the boy, all the while turning to bury his (red, burning, crimson) face into Zack's chest. The older one effortlessly lifted his young boyfriend and made his way to the room they shared, stuck in a lip lock with the blue haired English.

End Note: …Aaand that's how 'original' I am. *looks around* who wants another chapter? I don't expect to be updating this a lot, though. If I do make more than one chapter of this, I still won't make a real plot, just small things – in this case, Renesmee's toothache and things of the sort. It'll be a collection of massive crossover one-shots!

All in all, review and tell me what you think. If y'all want another chapter, please suggest stuff to cross!

-- Oh yeah, I almost forgot.

Pairings: Carlisle/Draco; Esme/Yuffie; Alice/Belle; Rosalie/Harry (straight #1); Edward/Jasper; Emmett/Sephiroth (this, my dears, is Ukeroth.); Cloud/Sebastien; Ciel/Zack; Renesmee/Jacob (straight #2).

The stories I crossed were Twilight (the saga), Final Fantasy and Kuroshitsuji. Try not to suggest any of them, keep it original! I'll do the pairing. :D

Btw: the world this is in is Twilight's, 'cause they have a nice big mansion-house-thingy.

Again, review and tell me what you think about this. Have a nice time!

- ~'Vrele