- A little self-insert snippet. I was rereading the Goblet of Fire, and this popped in my head. This is if I lived in Harry Potter's footsteps as a reincarnation with my memories. Truthfully, I'd probably have snapped earlier. The basilisk, most likely.
My current name pops out of the Goblet of Fire, as per this universe's decree.
"Harry Potter…"
Whispers start quietly around the room.
"HARRY POTTER!"
"I never asked for this…" I say morosely. A little humor from imitating someone that doesn't exist yet.
"Riiight.." a random Gryffindor nearby responded, not believing me.
I snapped.
"You think 'I' asked for this? Me, who got caught in every possible situation I don't want to be in every single FUCKING year?! Me, who KNEW EVERY MAJOR EVENT UNTIL MY SEVENTH YEAR?! Me, who knows THE FIRST FUCKING TRIAL IS FIGHTING A BROOD DRAGON TO STEAL AN EGG?!"
Silence reigns.
"Complain to me all you want about your lives. Mine's infinitely worse. There's only three people who might have worse lives in this 'verse still alive right now, and that's Severus Snape, Albus Dumbledore, and Sirius Black! And that's a very, very narrow might!"
I just realized what I said.
"Oh damnation."
I got up, walked up to the entrance out of the Great Hall and went inside the room holding the champions. Complete silence still followed.
"Hello there. I'm an adult child who knows exactly what's going to happen and doesn't want any part of this. How are your days? Mine's shitty."
The other champions just looked at me, as if wondering who this petulant child is.
"Wha-"
"I'm sorry if I'm rude right now, but I just got chosen by the bloody Goblet of Fire. Without putting my name in it. Or anything of the sort. I know what trials I'd have to face, and I want no part of this, even though I have no choice."
"What do you mean you know what trials? We've been very careful with our security an-"
"Does your security have protection against other universes peeking into yours? Of course it doesn't. So, I can say with all certainty that stealing an egg from a brood dragon is something I don't want any part of. At all."
"WHAT?!"
The other champions note what I say with a very loud exclamation, apparently not hearing me from the Great Hall. Guess the room's soundproof or something. They look back to Crouch and Bagman, and they note their pale faces. They pale further, seeing my words as truth.
At this time, Dumbledore walks in the room, as silent as the night.
"So. You knew?" he asked quietly, pointing his question to me.
"Yeah, I knew. I could list some of the death toll, if you want. I definitely don't know all of it, but the number's definitely over 200. The first death I know of starts this year though, well, the deaths I can affect."
"Not right here. Not the time or place." he states morosely.
"Too late. First death was Cedric Diggery, the original timeline, Harry Potter and Cedric tied for victory. The cup for the race through the maze was a portkey, which brought us to the Riddle Cemetery. Cedric died of the Killing Curse fired by Peter Pettigrew."
A slight grin grew from my face.
"Of course, I'm going to prevent that. There's been millions of perfect runs for this universe, by different versions of me, from gender-bents to street-rat. I'm going to make one. After all, what better way to stop a plan than an out-of-context problem?"
"Because I know what's coming. I might have been pissed off at my picking, but to hell with maintaining the timeline. As a brilliant man once said, 'Time Lord, victorious.'"
Because fuck timelines. I'm here to fill a hole, not maintain normality. No more acting like the original.