I'm not sure exactly what the inspiration was for this, but I really like it. I hope you do, too. Warning: pokes fun at Ed!

Superiority Complex

"Breathe out for me, please." The doctor placed his stethoscope on Ed's back, and the young alchemist did as he was told. His smooth exhale was short-lived however, as a coughing fight quickly replaced it. Ed grabbed a tissue from the bedside table and hacked up a glob of yellow-green slime. Al, sitting in a chair next to his brother's bed, cringed.

"Ew... Big brother, that's disgusting!" Ed balled up the tissue and hurled it into the trash can.

"Thanks, Al," he remarked. "I knew you'd understand."

"Maybe I would if somebody had had the sense to come in out of the rain!" Ed glowered.

"It wasn't raining that hard!" He slouched against his pillow and grimaced. "This is probably just a coincidence."

"Yeah, right."

The doctor picked up Ed's clipboard and made a few notes on it before handing it to the nurse. Moving over to the small sink, he washed his hands and appeared a moment later holding a syringe. Ed froze.

"It seems you have a simple respiratory infection. Not too serious, if treated properly. I'll just need to give you this -" He didn't get any farther. Ed leaped out of bed and bolted for the door, stopped only by Alphonse, who quickly blocked his path. Ed pounded his fists desperately on the armor's breastplate.

"Come on, Al, get out of the way!" he pleaded, glancing nervously back at the confused doctor.

"No," Al said firmly. "Come on, big brother, it won't last long. You need it."

"No, I don't!" Ed shouted. "I'll just drink a lot of tea, it'll be fine!

"Sir, I'm sorry, but this really is necessary." The nurse hurried over and pulled Ed away from his brother with surprisingly strong arms. Ed squirmed in her grasp.

"Noooo! I don't want it! I don't need it! Get away from me, you psychopaths!" The doctor reached for Ed's left shoulder, but to no avail.

"Sir, you're going to have to hold still."

"Al! Help me out here!" Ed nearly broke free of the nurse for a moment, but the doctor grabbed a hold of him too, and stopped him from escaping across the room. Al stood uncertainly for a moment, then moved for the door.

"Uh... I'll just wait outside..." Ed yelped in consternation.

"What! Al, don't leave me! You rotten brother, they're gonna stab me!" Al hurried out the door and slammed it shut behind him. He should probably help hold Ed down, but that seemed to be his main occupation lately, and he wasn't keen on doing it again. It was about time his big brother dealt with something like this on his own. At least if Al stood outside the door, Ed couldn't escape the room without using alchemy. Ed really needed to learn some self-control... Al sighed and looked up in surprise to see Colonel Mustang walking down the hall.

"Oh. Hello, Colonel." Mustang nodded.

"Al. I heard from Hawkeye that Ed was sick, so I thought I'd come take a look. How long am going to have to wait for him to recover this time?"

"Uh... Probably not too long if..." Al glanced back unconsciously at the closed door, where the sounds of carnage still blossomed from within. Mustang raised his eyebrows.

"What on earth is going on in there?"

"Nothing," Al said quickly. "Brother just doesn't like doctors much. Well, uh, shots..."

"I see." Mustang looked at the door for a moment and then suddenly smirked. "Tell you what, I can fix this." Al started.

"You can? Are you sure you should -" Al faltered, concerned about what Mustang's method of "fixing" the situation might be. Mustang pushed past Al without bothering to answer and opened the door.

"I'm telling you, I don't need a shot!" Ed was shouting. "It's not like -" He broke off suddenly and stopped his struggles as Mustang stepped into the room. The Flame Alchemist grinned at his subordinate.

"Wow, Ed. Sounds like a battle assessment in here. What seems to be the trouble?" Ed grimaced in annoyance.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Mustang shrugged and leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I like to keep myself informed, you know. When I heard you were at a hospital again, I thought I'd see for what." Ed snorted and gritted his teeth. Mustang glanced at the syringe as if just noticing it for the first time. "Shot, huh? Those can be painful." He raised an eyebrow mockingly. "Sure you're up to it?"

"Of course, I'm 'up to it!'" Ed scowled. "What do you think I am, a baby? I just don't think I need it, that's all!" The doctor spoke up tentatively.

"Actually, sir, I told you -" Mustang cut him off with a derisive laugh.

"You're wasting your time. Ed's not much for doing what he's told." A condescending smirk played about the colonel's lips, and the glance he threw at Ed was considerably amused. "You don't like needles huh, Fullmetal?" Ed glared at Mustang venomously.

"I told you, I just don't think I need it!" Mustang sighed, ignoring Ed's remark.

"It's a common phobia, really."

"I don't have a phobia!"

"I wouldn't have expected it from you, though."

"You don't know what you're talking about!"

"Oh well, happens to the best of us..."

"Oh, forget it! Just give me the damn thing if it'll shut him up!" Ed bared his shoulder defiantly and the doctor needed no second bidding. He glanced at the nurse with relief and plunged the needle in quickly. Ed didn't flinch. "Happy now?" he asked Mustang sarcastically. "Why don't you go back to napping at your desk or whatever the hell you do when you're not bugging me!" Mustang shrugged irritably and pushed off from the wall.

"I expect you in my office tomorrow, Fullmetal. Don't think a cold is getting you any time off." He opened the door and headed out without giving Ed another glance.

"Like you ever give me time off, anyway!" Ed shouted at Mustang's retreating back. Al stepped out of the colonel's way as the door shut behind him. Mustang smirked and leaned conspiratorially toward the younger Elric brother.

"Just challenge a man's masculinity, Al. Gets more done than setting a hundred things on fire." Mustang's smirk became a full-fledged grin and he sauntered off back down the corridor. A moment later, the door opened and Ed stepped out, yanking on his coat.

"Come on Al, let's go," he said testily. "Damn colonel and his superiority complex..."

Al caught a quick glimpse of the shot bandage on his brother's arm before the coat covered it, and wisely decided not to say anything. As they headed back to their hotel room though, Al was for once glad that the suit of armor tended to obscure his expressions. Otherwise, Ed would have clearly seen that he was smiling all the way there.

Please review, and let me know if I made you laugh!