Now this... I started working on this back in November, not really being in the mood for writing. But alas, now Simon Flywheel has returned to Fanfiction. Boo, cheer, do whatever the hell you want. I don't care.

Quick info: You know what I really don't like? A parody fan fiction where the writer just replaces the characters in the parodied movie or TV show with the names of the… Wait, an example.

Summary for a fan fiction like that: Gabriella is new to Peach Creek High School and straight away fits in with the nerdy Nazz. She suddenly falls for basketball star Eddward "Double-D" Bolton but when the two audition for the spring musical together, the status quo of the school is destroyed! What do the drama department's royal twins Sarah and Jimmy think of it and what will they do? Read and find out!

What I'm gonna do: Write. What the hell do you expect me to do, eat a banana? Actually, now I just might.

Chapter 1 – Of Thistletwats' and- Oh shut up, it's not that funny!

"Excuse me, Mrs. Thistletwat?" The teacher's name made Ed and Eddy burst into a hysterical laughing fit. Double-D turned to them both with a raised eyebrow. "Really? After three years of education, you still find our teacher of mathematics' last name humorous?"

"What can I say Double-D, it's a classic." Eddy wiped a tear away from his eye, looked at his hat wearing friend and then started to laugh again.

"Classic is my favorite taste Double-D!" Ed clutched his stomach and laughed even more.

"I'm surrounded by… Excuse me, Mrs. Thistletwat?" He heard behind him that his best friends' started to laugh manically.

"Yes Mr. Hammer?" The teacher with twenty-five years of teaching, and a note which read 'Could I have a more fitting name?', behind her turned around to look at the most intelligent student of the class- nay, the whole school.

"I couldn't help but notice to find a serious error in your equation." Mrs. Thistletwat spun around and her eyes waltzed around the board to find the error. "There." Double-D held out his arm to point out the error which was supposed imaginary by Mrs. Thistletwat. "Should that not be 16 over pi?" Mrs. Thistletwat located the 'so-called' error and laughed.

"That's quite impossible Mr. Hammer." She turned and snickered.

"I am quite sure it is 16 over pi."

"You can be as quite as you want to Mr. Hammer, it's still impossible."

"I want 74.3 over ham!" Ed remarked which made both Double-D and Mrs. Thistletwat look at him. Double-D then turned back to face the teacher who had a puzzled look shoved in between the wrinkles.

"Mrs. Thistletwat, it should be 16 over pi."

"Mr. Hammer, maybe you should turn to the drama department if you like High School Musical, but this is math class, we calculate real numbers here." Satisfied with her answer, she turned around and started to write again.

"Mrs. Thistletwat, if you could just use the calculator, you would find out that it should be 16 over pi." Double-D held out his calculator towards his teacher who turned on the spot, her eyes turning black.

"I have twenty-five years of teaching and a college degree behind me and now you come here and try to correct me?" Mrs. Thistletwat's face, on the other hand, turned red as she almost screamed Double-D in the face.

"He found a flaw in Einstein's theory of relativity!" Max exclaimed loudly, sitting next to Ed and Eddy. Mrs. Thistletwat's eyes moved from Double-D to the three laughing and smiling boys who got quiet and turned serious in two seconds.

"Well then, Mr. Hammer" She said with so much hate, you'd think Double-D's family had wronged hers for generations. "Why don't you and I" She turned away from the students and walked over to the chalkboard. Erasing what was on it, she smiled to herself. "Solve this little mathematical equation?" She started writing numbers, letters, drawing lines and geometrical shapes.

"Max, is that even a thing?" Eddy elbowed his friend to the right and pointed at the board.

"Eddy... That's pi, you learn about it in the seventh grade."

"Pie?"

"I don't know what's worst; Mrs. 63-years-old watching High School Musical or you not knowing of pi!"

"Pie! I hope it's blue raspberry guys!" Ignoring Ed's remark, Max and Eddy focused on the board where Mrs. Thistletwat was drawing things' they couldn't even imagine existed.

"There Mr. Hammer, grab some chalk and on my command, we start." Mrs. Thistletwat said and turned, looking straight through Double-D and into his soul. "Mr. Hammer, if you think you can outsmart me with some ridiculous 'error', you got another thing coming!"

"But it really is 16 over pi!" Double-D defended himself.

"But it really is 16 over pi!" She repeated in a mock voice. "Stop quoting Sweet Sixteen movies Mr. Hammer and get up here!"

"Mrs. Thistletwat-"He tried to ignore his best friends' laughter behind him. "I don't think that I should prove that I am worthy of an A+ in most subjects, you should be a mature enough person to see that yourself." That was clearly a mistake and Double-D realized it a second later when he saw Mrs. Thistletwat's lips turn into a thin, thin, white line.

"Mr. Hammer, you get up here or that A+ will become an F for the rest of your time here!" Double-D heard the threat in the voice and jumped up. Rushing over to the board in fear, he grabbed a piece of chalk, not without shivering like a maniac and got ready to write. He couldn't help but to already calculate half of the equation.

"I'm not sure this is the right thing to do Mrs. Thistletw-"She motioned him to stop.

"We wouldn't want any laughs during our little duel here."

"Mrs. Thistletw- Ma'am, I really don't think this is necess-"

"Go!" Mrs. Thistletwat's hand started to move the piece of chalk across the board with alarming speed and Double-D's hand wasn't late to follow.

"Nazz, you're coming over to my place tonight right? Celebrating we're free for two weeks?" Kevin waved goodbye to Rolf and turned to Nazz. He leaned against the locker next to hers. They had just finished basketball/cheerleading practice and Nazz was getting ready to leave Peach Creek High School for the winter.

"I don't know Kev, it got kind of late last time. And plus, I don't know if I'm ready for it yet."Nazz dug deeper into her locker, not looking at her boyfriend.

"Come on Nazz, you said this was going to be it!" He groaned out of clear annoyance.

"Kevin, I got like homework that was due yesterday and it's my turn to like help cook and do the dishes." Nazz still didn't look at Kevin; they had had seven discussions like this already.

"Then you'll cook and do the dishes and then you can come over to my place and do your homework at my place." Kevin tried to get eye contact with Nazz but failed. Miserably. That must've been one deep locker.

"I don't know Kev, I'm sorta tired and all…"

"Damn it Nazz!" Kevin punched the looker next to hers with such great force, it got a dent. Nazz jumped at the noise, but was doing nothing to calm her boyfriend down. There was nothing she could say. "You can't just go and promise something and then break it!"

"Kev, I'm just not ready…" Nazz hid her face from her boyfriend's anger. A single tear escaped her eye.

"For God's sake Nazz, you can't change your fucking mind every day!" Kevin turned and sighed. "I'm sorry Nazz; I'm just sick and tired of waiting…"

"Well then Kev, go get a slut like Naomi for a girlfriend who'll put out on the first date!" Nazz turned and showed her tears to the world.

"Hey!" Naomi's head popped out from behind a locker.

"Oh, who are you kidding? We all heard of you and Max!" Naomi shrugged and giggled.

"So what do you wanna do?" Kevin searched for eye contact with his girlfriend but didn't find it.

"Kev, if you can't wait for me being ready, maybe we should just take a break." Nazz got back to digging in her locker and pulled out her math book.

"You wanna break up? Fine with me." Nazz looked up in shock and turned her head with great speed.

"What, no! I just wanna take a break!" She looked at the young man she had for one and a half years called her boyfriend with more tears in her eyes.

"No, it's okay, 've been thinking about it as well. So, we break up, that's that..." An awkward silence, then the sentence that broke her heart. "Later dude." Kevin made some unidentified hand gesture and turned, walking away from his now crying ex-girlfriend.

'What the hell just happened?' was Nazz's first thought before she answered it a mere second later and as a result ran down the hall into a bathroom, into a booth.

"Double-D, that was awesome! You really showed her who's best!" Eddy laughed at his friend's showdown with their math teacher.

"You are!" Ed screamed, not knowing what they were laughing at.

"Little harsh of her to give you a detention though." Max pointed at the note in Double-D's hand. He looked at his friend who was very pale.

"Me…? A detention..? For my KNOWLEDGE?" Double-D screamed which resulted in Eddy and Ed stopping.

"Real shame, the day before Winter break too."

"Relax Sock head, Ed and me get like seventeen detentions a week." Eddy patted his taller friend on the back and looked over at Max. "How you doing Maximum?"

"Eh, you get used to it after a while. Losing count too." Suddenly, Eddy turned right and started to walk down the hallway that led to the exit. "Eddy, aren't you going to detention?" Max raised an eyebrow and looked at Eddy who grinned.

"Of course I am but first, Ed and I have an appointment to see Mrs. Goldberg." Eddy nudged Ed's ribs and snickered. Ed started to laugh as well.

"Well, what are- No, no! Do not tell me you're going to put a bag of flaming dog feces on her lawn! Again!" Double-D raised a warning finger at his friend who smirked.

"Who do you take me for Double-D, Dennis the Menace?"

"Are you surprised that my answer is yes?"

"Are you surprised if my answer is no?"

"Are you surprised you fellows lost me?" Max broke the two friend's smirking contest and shrugged. "Not to interrupt but we must be heading over to detention now."

"Right! Ed, business!" Eddy took off down the hallway, leaving a small dust cloud behind him.

"Wait for me Dennis!" Ed ran after his friend in his stereotypical way, laughing as usual.

"Sometimes I worry what effect Eddy have on Ed." Double-D shook his head and started to walk towards the infamous classroom where detention was held.

"Ed's a good kid, he's just… Stupid?"

"Let's say that Ed just is rather unfortunate when he thinks." Max nodded at his friend's remark.

"Well then, here we are. Last detention before this year ends. Feels… Really good."

"Max, you have close to 200 more detention hours for your rampage with Marie."

"You just HAD to go and ruin, didn't yah?" The young Flywheel glared at his friend and opened the door to the detention room, grinning when he saw the teacher inside. "G'dye mate!"

"G'dye Mr. Flywheel! Have a seat!" Max made his way towards a seat in the front and sat down. "Will Ed and Eddy join us?" Mr. Johnson asked, playing with the pen in his hands.

"They had some… business to take care of." Max scratched the back of his head and smiled nervously.

"I think I'll go and look for them after this then, they still haven't served time for the thing with Mrs. Goldberg's lawn, even though I can say it was really hilarious." Mr. Johnson winked at Max who cracked up. "Even got it on tape. Strictly for evidential matter."

"Of course." Max said, putting on a straight face.

"I can hook you up with a copy." Mr. Johnson winked at Max again which made the latter grin.

"Excuse me Mr. Johnson?" Double-D was sweating nervously.

"Eddward Hammer! Our most glorified student of the entire school, not to leave out that you're the smartest! What in the name of Vishnu and his pack of Indians have you done to be sent to detention?" Mr. Johnson looked at Double-D, surprise written across the face.

"Well… Mrs. Thistletwat-"Mr. Johnson and Max burst out laughing.

"Always as fun…" Mr. Johnson wiped a tear from his eye.

"She challenged me to-"Mr. Johnson raised his finger as a motion to stop the young man's explanation.

"Say no more. Every year or so, we get a student in here that Mrs. T challenge to an 'academic battle between a great and a simple mind'." Mr. Johnson rolled his eyes and stood up. "The students are sent here afterwards, usually because she is a horrible winner. I mean the whole shebang; gloating, victory dance, posting her victory on her blog-"

"She has a blog?" Max raised an eyebrow.

"Had. It was attacked last year and when she tracked down the attacker, it turned out that the attack had occurred from one of the computer club's computers! On school hours too! And on my lunch break! Very, very strange."Said Mr. Johnson, the founder and chairman of the school's computer club, with a wink.

"Well Mr. Johnson, that was not the case. I was sent here because… Well…"

"He had the answer finished thirty seconds before the old hag!" Max pronounced but focused his eyes on the bench when Mr. Johnson stared at him.

"You crushed… Mrs. T at her own game?" Mr. Johnson's eye twitched as he turned his head against Double-D.

"To stick with the truth, yes I did sir." Double-D closed his eyes to receive his capital punishment and expected Mr. Johnson to scream his lungs out.

"You, Mr. Hammer, are the Chosen One." Double-D looked up to see Mr. Johnson grinning, his smile reaching from ear to ear. "We have expected your arrival for years now, waiting for the person to put Mrs. T off her high horses." The 27-year old male stepped forward to Double-D and grabbed the latter's shoulders. "Get out of here son!" He turned the young man around and started to push him out the door.

"But Mr. Johnson-"Double-D protested.

"Mr. Hammer, you are our savior and for that, you shall not be punished with the great detention slip. You shall be granted with freedom, wine, women and cucumber soup! Have a merry christmas and to all a good night!" With that, Mr. Johnson slammed the door shut behind Double-D and turned to Max.

"Can I go as well?" Max asked and put on an angel like facial impression.

"You know you're spending time here for your rampage through the school with Marie Kanker!" Mr. Johnson shook his head at the memory.

"It was self-defense, she chased me!"

"You call destroying over half of the first floor classrooms, plowing up the football field, demolishing 75% of the student's lockers and ending up going to second base in front of a class during P.E. is self-defense?" Mr. Johnson raised an eyebrow.

"Yes!"

'I must say, I was rather fortunate there.' Double-D thought as he wandered down the hall towards his locker. 'But I do wonder where are Ed and Eddy?' The young man continued down the hall, walking past the gym to his locker when he heard a sob. Then another one. Then he was sure that someone was crying somewhere. He looked around to see any possible hiding places and noticed a toilet. Even though it was the ladies' room, Double-D inhaled deeply and pushed the door open.

"H-hello? Is there anybody in here?" The young man tried not look too carefully at anything in there but wanted to locate the person who was upset as fast as possible so he could 'get the hell out of there' as Eddy would've said.

"Dou-Double-D?" The sobbing came to a halt.

"Nazz?" It took all of Double-D's strength to look under the doors' to the toilet booths' in the search for his longtime friend. "W-what is the matter?" The second booth, empty.

"I-I-I" Nazz started crying again. Third booth, a used condom on the floor…

"SWEET MOTHER OF MERCY!" Double-D shot up and coughed, his gagging reflexes starting to get worked up again.

"I-I'm over here d-dude." The young man saw a hand waving from under the door in the second to last booth. "S-so, I wanna guess you sa-haw the condom?"

"Who would do something like that in here? Strict violation of the school rules!" Double-D walked over to the booth and heard a small giggle.

"You'd be surprised by how many do that in here." The young man coughed in surprise, eager to change the subject

"So.. I couldn't help but overhear you out in the hallway…" Nazz gasped.

"You could hear me?"

"Why yes but-"His comment didn't exactly appear to help as Nazz broke down in another fit of tears. "Nazz, please open the door, I want to help you!" A knock on the door.

"Go away!" Double-D was startled by his friend's sudden emotional outburst but respected her wish partly. He opened the door to the booth next to hers, tore off a healthy amount of toilet paper and placed it on the toilet lid, waiting for his friend to calm down.

"Double-D?"

"Yes?"

"Are you still there?"

"Isn't it quite obvious since I've answered?" Nazz giggled.

"Yeah…" Silence. "Kevin broke up with me."

"Oh…" A small part of Double-D's heart skipped a beat, seeing as every boy on the Cul-de-Sac (minus Jimmy (duh) and Rolf (who's just… Rolf) had had a crush on Nazz. "Uhm… May I ask why?"

"He's been all over me for the last months about sex and stuff like that-"Double-D's heart stopped for a mere second. "But I've been like: 'Kev, you gotta be like patient and all' but he just wouldn't listen to me about it. So, we broke up instead. Or, he like dumped me."

"Oh Nazz, I am deeply sorry to hear that…" Truth was, he was actually sorry for his friend. Even though he hadn't really connected with Nazz over the years, they still hung out every now and then, watching movies or stuff like that.

"There goes like my entire Christmas down the drain." He heard her sniffle on the other side of the wall.

"Well… It's not much but would you like to participate in some activities with me during the upcoming- Technically, ongoing holidays?" Double-D couldn't see it but Nazz looked up, a glimpse of hope in her eyes.

"Activities dude?" Double-D suddenly turned nervous and started to straighten his tie as a result of his question.

"Well, perhaps you would be interested in watching a few movies with me?" 'She won't, she won't, she won't, she won't, she won't-'

"Sure dude, I'd love to."

'-She won't, she won't, she what?'

"When…" He coughed nervously. "When does it perhaps fit you?"

"Are we talking cinema movies or DVD movies?"

"Well, both…?" She smiled at his insecurity.

"Can we like watch one tonight?"

"Uhm…" Double-D almost fainted. "I would have to ask Mother and Father first but I am quite certain they would approve of it." Nazz smiled and shook her head; she knew Double-D's parents were never home anyway.

"Awesome dude." There was a short silence which Double-D found uncomfortable. Nazz on the other hand enjoyed it, knowing that she had a friend on the other side of the wall.

"Nazz?"

"Yeah dude?"

"Are you feeling somewhat better now?"

"A lot better, thanks to you." Double-D blushed at her compliment.

"My…" Nazz raised an eyebrow since she couldn't see his actions. "I better be going now, I promised Ed I would meet him by the comic book store after detention."

"I'll be fine dude, really. Just need to sit here a little longer."

"I thought I raised your spirit?"

"It's… My time of the month Double-D." The young man's face underwent a few changes, including the eyes opening up wide and the entire face taking on a completely new shade of red.

"Oh-I-We-Uh-O-o-o-ok-okay…" He stuttered as he slowly exited the booth, his friend giggling in the background. "Well… I will… Send you a text message later about… Where… When… Something, adjective, noun, verb, noun, adjective…"

"Do you have my number dude?"

"Unfortunately, no…"

"You know, I have yours so I'll just text you."

"Very well then…" He got nervous again. "Are you sure you feel better now?"

"Yeah, thanks dude!"

"It was… Nothing…" There was a small moment of silence.

"Comic book store?"

"Right! Completely forgot! Thank you very much! Let's… Yes, text me so I can text you!" She heard him stumble across the exit of the room.

"Later dude!"

"Yes… Later!" With that, Double-D exited the bathroom and Nazz smiled to herself.

"Double-D?" Said person looked up to stand face to face with the vice president of the science club and at the same time one of the school's most attractive girls, Arizona Gray.

"Uhm… Double-D… Yes, that is me"

"Why… Why did you just exit the ladies' room?" Double-D turned and looked at the closed door, turning again to face his fellow classmate.

"Well, uhm, yes, so, well, I, coffee beans, like, somewhat, truth, from, allover, the, adjective, balloon, cracker, cheese, army boot, champagne weekend in Vegas, Eiffel, wall, Valkyrie…" A stream of words flowed out of the young man's mouth which was connected to a face that was now redder than... red paint, though not one of the words made sense to the current situation. Well, maybe the champagne one.

"Are you okay?" She raised an eyebrow, smiling slightly.

"Uhm…"

"Hey Double-D!" They both turned their heads to see Max Flywheel stand by the lockers. "You ready to go meet Ed?"

"Yes, yes I am."

"Hey Grey-Zone!" The newcomer grinned at Arizona.

"Maxwheel!" They exchanged waves.

"Well, let us get going then." The president of the science club hurried past the vice president and joined Max by his side.

"Bye Grey-Zone!"

"Bye Maxwheel, see you Double-D!"

"Have a continuously nice day Arizona." With that, Arizona entered the ladies' room and the two young men walked towards the exit.

"Goodness gracious that girl's fine man!" Max stated as soon as they were out of range from the bathroom.

"Please Max, let's just go to the comic book store and meet Ed."

"Come on man, you two are like that!" The young Flywheel crossed two of his fingers' and showed them to his friend. "You gotta help me get her interest!"

"Max, can we please not discuss this right now?"

"But I really think I'm falling for her! We have all this stuff in common! Hobbies, interests, you name it! I just really love the way she talks, the way she analyzes a situation the minute she encounters it! And her ass! Mm, mm, mm! You just don't see asses like that today!" With that, the two friends exited the school and started their journey towards the comic book store. 'Twas not until one hour later the young Eddward Hammer would notice the text that he received in that very moment, giving him the number of the girl he had fancied all his life.

Thanks.