A/N: This is my 2nd fic, and it really sucks, sorry. R&R anyway, so I can get better, alright?
There is gayness in this, I s'pose. Don't like, don't read! (It's barely anything though, and I think you can handle it, even if you're not one for that kind of thing.)
I find that there is OOCness in this, and I apologize. I have a horrible time staying in character. ;
Anyway, this is for my favorite couple, Xigbar and Demyx! (It's a weird pair, but w/e, I love it)
I do not own Kingdom Hearts, Squeenix does! (Sadly. I mean, come on, Organization Xlll deserves happy endings, not just 'fading away' crap!)
Demyx strolled through the castle in the World That Never Was, not paying attention to much of anything. He really had nothing to do, and most of the others were on missions. He loved playing his sitar, but after five straight hours of strumming, even that became unbearable.
The blonde sighed and sank to the floor in the middle of a random hall, exhausted from all the walking he'd done. It was times like this that he really got around to thinking.
"There is a heart up there, there is a heart down here. We all have hearts, shadows of them, beating…breathing…living…feeling." Demyx muttered out the string of random words in the form of a little song.
"lX, what on earth are you doing?"
Demyx turned around at the sound of his number from behind him. He got up quickly when he saw it was ll, a higher rank than him, and almost fell in the process. He hadn't seen anyone all day, but now he was embarrassed.
"I wasn't doing anything Xigbar, promise!" Demyx tried saying happily, beginning to walk away. His voice lacked his normal bounce and contained the slightest hint of sadness, which Xigbar noted right away.
Now normally--that is--for anyone else, Xigbar would've shrugged and walked off himself. This was Demyx though, and Demyx required special attention. The guy was usually bouncing with energy and always overly happy, but this time…He seemed sort of lost, like some animal in the street. Xigbar almost chuckled at that thought, but kept it in. Laughing now would just hurt the guy more. He got his head out of the clouds and addressed lX again.
"Now, sitting in the hall and talking to yourself…Is that 'doing nothing' these days? Because, I'm pretty sure what you were doing was actually something, unless I'm crazy. Which I'm not." Xigbar pressed, putting a hand on the smaller nobody's shoulder and spinning him around to face him in his one eye. He gave Demyx a grin.
Demyx avoided ll's face, missing the smile, and looked down at the floor instead. 'He heard me singing?' Demyx thought frantically inside his head. He had to think of an excuse…Sadly, he couldn't think of one, and Xigbar was growing impatient, if that was even possible for someone without feelings…Wait a minute…
"You feel, don't you!" Demyx blurted out suddenly, looking at Xigbar while saying this.
Xigbar was taken aback. He didn't expect an outburst like that. He looked at the smaller nobody's face. Hope was in his aqua eyes, as though he had made an epiphany and the Free Shooter's actions would resolve the kid.
"Umm…kid…That's not possible, remember? We've told you time and time agai--" He cut himself off as he saw the younger male's face fall in despair. Man, if he didn't have feelings, why did it hurt him to see Demyx's face like that?
"Hmm…I see. Sorry for disturbing you then ll, I'll be off now…" Demyx sighed and walked away, even though it was ll who had disturbed him, technically. He was so sick of trying. Nobody would ever believe him that they could feel, and they really did have hearts (ha ha, the thought humored him bitterly)?
Xigbar stood there shocked, but didn't make a move to follow the younger one. Instead he stood there until Demyx's small shape faded around a corner at the end of the hall.
--
Later that night, Xigbar couldn't get to sleep. He had tossed and turned forever, but nothing helped. He didn't know this, but Demyx was also having insomnia problems. If Xigbar couldn't get to sleep because of something small, like what had happened earlier that day, then maybe Demyx was right and they really could feel. He got out of bed as quietly as he could and crept through the halls, wanting to get these things off his mind.
Demyx got out of bed after staring at the ceiling for two hours, and decided to walk around the castle like he had earlier that day. He was sure everyone else was fast asleep, so he didn't worry too much about keeping deadly quiet or anything. He walked slowly, looking out all the windows. It was a beautiful night, but then again, it always looked like that outside pretty much. Day was a bit lighter and the moon didn't shine as brightly. Regardless of that, he couldn't help to stare. Everything looked so crisp, so clean, so...real. At least he could believe that the night was real, even if feelings for nobodies weren't.
For some odd reason that Demyx couldn't help, a lone tear streaked across his cheek. He just felt so…lost lately. He had given his speech countless times now, but no one showed even the slightest encouragement that perhaps, just maybe, he was right.
More tears came without his consent, and he didn't make a move to stop them. He simply continued to stare out the window, seeing nothing, and not realizing that someone was getting closer and closer to him from behind.
Xigbar had not walked far when he could feel the presence of another non-sleeping nobody in the same hall. At first he thought it might be Vexen coming back from the labs after a late night of experimenting, and was greatly surprised when he saw it was Demyx. The kid hadn't realized he was there and, as he got closer, he realized (to his horror) that Demyx was crying silently. The strongest urge to hug the little guy and comfort him came to Xigbar, but he held it back. After all, what good would false feelings do for the little dude?
Xigbar came closer and tapped the Melodious Nocturne on the shoulder. He was surprised when Demyx cringed from his touch and let out a squeak of shock that someone other than himself was up and about at this time.
Demyx spun around, the tear marks still plastered to his face. "X-Xigbar! W-what are you doing up?" he asked, flustered.
Xigbar gave a sort of grin, settling with, "I could ask you the same thing, kiddo. Now…what's wrong?" Xigbar wasn't the type to beat around the bush.
Demyx blushed, wiping his face with the sleeves of his light blue pajamas. "N-nothing's wrong! I mean, it's not like we can feel, right?" his voice broke as he said this.
Bingo. That's what had been bothering the kid lately! Xigbar narrowed his eye and put both his hands on Demyx's shoulders. "Now you listen to me, Demyx. The others may not believe, and heck, even I may not be sure about your whole theory!" Xigbar said sternly to the blonde, making sure their eyes met. "But," he continued, trying to sound nicer now, "As long as you believe the theory that we have hearts and can indeed feel, I say keep believing and trying! Look at me for example! I was a scientist that believed the 'impossible', others had said, but all my theories turned out to be true anyway, right? No one believed the six of us, but we were right all along. Maybe…Maybe you can be right too! Just keep on holding to that thought, no matter what anyone else says, alright?" That had to be the longest and most cheesy speech the Free Shooter had ever told, but he felt it would be important to Demyx.
Xigbar looked to see what Demyx's reaction would be, hoping the kid wouldn't think he was spouting a load of bull. You can imagine how surprised he was when Demyx started crying again and crushed him in a hug.
"X-Xiggie! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! You have no clue how much I've been doubting myself lately. You've really given me the strength to go on. I know I can feel, because when I look at you, I feel all warm inside! When bad stuff happens to you or I think you're mad at me, my chest aches. I know it's stupid to think I can feel, but I know. I know. Xigbar, I…I love you." He knew he had to get it out now, or he'd never say it. He knew Xigbar wouldn't say anything back, but that was okay with him.
Xigbar clutched back at the blonde, pulling him closer into the hug. He couldn't get any words out, so he settled on simply hugging him until the blonde was asleep in his arms, standing up. Then he carried him back to his room, bridal style.
It was strange, how a little twerp like that could make him feel whole, Xigbar thought, as he lay back in bed again. He would never say he believed Demyx's theory, and Demyx would never know Xigbar believed him until the day he died.
Yes, Xigbar wasn't one to profess things, but when he saw the portal to Demyx's door fade one fateful day, he knew. His heart ached and it was a pain worse than anything imaginable. He could feel. He knew all along, he supposed, but it took the death of the man he cared for most to finally get him confess that he believed. It was too late now, but it must be said anyway, or he'd never forgive himself.
"Demyx…I love you too."