A/N: An original work! (Gasp) Yeah, I've been working on this for a long time, and I'm finally far enough ahead that I think I can keep writing chapters while still updating at a reasonable pace. I hope you guys like this, b/c this is one of my favorites so far. This isn't the best chapter, but it gets really good later, I promise. Stick with me on this, it's gonna be a good one!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything... except myself and the ideas...That's it. BTW, I installed the lawyer traps, so unless you have cloned zombie lawyers, I would suggest leaving me alone.

Youkai in Black

The room was pitch black. Suddenly, two spotlights appeared, showing Himizu and Ryouko dressed in black jeans, black long-sleeved T-shirts, and black high-heeled boots. They were also wearing black trench coats, black sunglasses, and black fedoras. Then the song Men in Black by Will Smith began to play and the two girls started dancing to the music

"Here come the Men in Black. Here come the Men in Black. They won't let you remember. Here come the Men in Black. Here come the Men in Black. They won't let you remember…"

After several minutes of this, a door opened quietly and a dark shadow slipped into the room, shutting the door before the girls noticed anything. Then the music stopped.

Himizu jerked her head around. "What the hell? Where's my music???"

Ryouko groaned softly. "I bet I know what it is…"
Himizu looked furious. "You're kidding, right?"
"Nope…" Ryouko shook her head.

"Again???" Himizu squawked.

"Yep…" The shaking turned to nodding.

Both girls turned to the left side of the stage. "DAMNIT JAGANSHI, GET OUT OF HERE!!!"

Lights suddenly flipped on, revealing everyone's favorite fire demon next to the music player, which was now off. He hadn't cut it with his katana or anything, probably for fear of death.

"Hn… What are you two doing? You've been barricaded in here all morning," Hiei said.

The girls looked at each other. Himizu threw her hands up in despair and went over to a high-tech computer and began typing in a series of letters and numbers. Ryouko turned back to the youkai.

"Not that it's any of your business, but we're making a commercial."

Judging by the shocked expression on Hiei's face, that hadn't been what he had been expecting. "Run that by me again… I think I must have misunderstood you."

"Did she just tell you that a chicken is the Antichrist?" asked Himizu. "Because it is, but most people can't understand that. No one understands that the Holy Duck must be worshipped and that the Demonic Chicken is the Antichrist!!! Why don't they understand??? IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!!!"

"Well, you're wearing that stupid fedora, so you don't have any room to talk," Hiei snapped at her.

"NEVER… INSULT… THE FEDORA!!!" Himizu yelled, going all doom-like and attacking him with a mallet.

Kurama walked in, just in time to see Hiei dodge the mallet and jump onto one of the ceiling rafters so Himizu couldn't attack him any more. She started cussing him out furiously.

"What's going on here?" asked Kurama.

Ryouko sighed. "Long story…"

Kurama lifted his eyebrows as he watched Himizu cussing Hiei out in every curse word of every language she knew… it was actually a rather long list. "I can imagine… give me a summary."

"Okay… Himizu and I are making a commercial and Hiei keeps interrupting us, so Himizu finally flipped out and I think she's going to go rabid in a minute."

"You're making a commercial?" Kurama asked incredulously.

"Yeah, you wanna see it?" Ryouko asked. Kurama shrugged in assent, so she typed several keys on the keyboard and a picture appeared on a giant projector screen hanging on the opposite wall.

The screen showed Ryouko and Himizu in the same black outfits that they were wearing now while large bold letters said 'Chicks in Black' across the screen. Men in Black started playing as the girls danced and an announcer voice talked about how the two girls were master thieves and assassins, masters of disguise, able to carry out any mission of stealth, ready and willing to risk their lives for adventure and some cash. Occasionally a still-shot or a short clip showed the girls doing various spy-type things, such as climbing walls with grapnels and rope, standing against a wall holding giant machine guns, and Himizu driving a cool black convertible with Ryouko riding shotgun. The photos and clips showed the girls as cool, sophisticated, and deadly… It was a good ad, Kurama thought. But they had to be nuts.

"You have to be nuts!" Hiei said, voicing Kurama's thoughts for him. "Why would you want to hire yourselves out as thieves or spies or whatever?"

"Cuz we need more money and we think it would be a little easier to advertise and get hired," Ryouko replied.

"But if you get caught, you'll still be punished even if you're only following orders," Kurama pointed out.

"That's why we're not going to get caught," Himizu told him.

"I can't believe you're actually going to do this. I mean, do you even know what type of people are going to be hiring you?" Hiei asked.

"Underworld scum who won't want to leave any trace of their activities behind and so will try to assassinate us, or some freaky messed-up pervs who think it'll be a thrill to hire a couple hot chicks just for kicks and try to bang them… of course, we will happily kick the ass of any jerk stupid enough to try that," Himizu said, cracking her knuckles.

"And when are you planning to air this commercial?" Kurama asked, feeling slightly horrified.

"Right now…" Ryouko replied, hitting a button. "At this moment, the commercial is airing almost everywhere, on TV, on the Internet, on the radio, etc. Now we just have to wait for a call."

"God, you two are psychotic."

"CHICKEN!!!"

"HOLY HELL!!!" screamed Himizu, jumping a mile and landing on the rafters next to Hiei, crouched in a position similar to a nervous cat. She twitched madly. "I hate that phone…"

Ryouko answered it. "Hello, Chicks in Black. Yes… yes… an hour? Sure… Okay, see you then." She hung up the phone. "HIMIZU!!! GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE!!!" she yelled.

Himizu stared at the floor. Then she blinked. Then she looked up and saw that Hiei was standing next to her. Then she pulled out her mallet. Hiei groaned and jumped quickly off the rafters and down to the floor. Himizu followed. Ryouko grabbed her by the collar before she could mangle Hiei further.

"Listen you, we have a client! We have to get to his house in an hour!"

"Where does he live?"

"He says the house is in Germany… NAZIS!!!"

"Oh my God…" Kurama muttered. "You girls are so doomed…"

"No we're not!" Himizu said, adjusting her fedora happily.

"What in the world makes you say that?" demanded Hiei.

"Because you two are coming with us as our bodyguards!" Ryouko said happily. Both boys looked at each other and turned to run. They were promptly snatched and held by their collars.

"You can't run, you should know that by now," Himizu scolded them. "Now about your uniforms…"

"Oh holy God…" Hiei groaned. Ryouko looked them both over.

"Hiei, you're fine… you look all scary and evil and you're wearing black… but Kurama, you need work. Here, put these on!"

Kurama found himself holding an outfit that was nearly identical to the girl's, except that his boots didn't have high-heels.

"I will not wear a fedora," he told them. Himizu rolled her eyes, but took the fedora and gave him a different black hat with a low brim that he could pull down until it almost covered his eyes. She tossed Hiei a pair of black sunglasses and a black trench coat. He just glared at her.

"Just put them on, at least we're not making you completely change clothes!" she yelled at him. He shrugged and took the coat and sunglasses. Then the foursome walked out to a garage. Inside, they found the cool black car that the girls had been driving in their commercial.

"Nice ride…" Hiei said.

"Thanks. We like it," Himizu said, hopping into the driver's seat, not even using the door, just hopping over it and onto the smooth black leather seat. Ryouko also hopped over her door into the shotgun position. Kurama and Hiei both froze.

"I don't think so, there is no way I'm gonna ride in a car driven by YOU!!!" Hiei exclaimed.

"It's better than riding in a car being driven by Ryouko, at least I have my license," Himizu pointed out.

"Who in their right minds would give you a license???" Hiei yelled.

"The guy that gave me my test… He acted like a pissed off robot, but I didn't break any traffic laws, so he thought I would be a good little girl and all that… mwa ha ha!" she cackled.

"Shut up fool. But it's true that she does have a license… not even God knows what she did to get it, but she got it," Ryouko told the boys. "NOW GET IN THE DAMN CAR!!!"

"Is it safe?" Kurama asked.

"I've ridden with her dozens of times. I'm still alive, aren't I?"

"You're immortal…"

"Good point… but she's never crashed, she loves this car too much."

"GET IN YOU FOOLS!!!" Himizu yelled. The two boys decided it would be in their best interest to do so, and they climbed in. Himizu started the car. Speed Kills, by Bush (good song, don't own) began playing and Himizu floored the gas, sending the car rocketing out of the garage and down the street. She hit a button on the dashboard and suddenly the whole landscape vanished and was replaced by a totally different landscape. "Welcome to Germany," she announced happily.

"So the car travels through different dimensions?" Kurama asked.

"Of course. It wouldn't be much use to us otherwise," Ryouko pointed out. Get a Grip by Aerosmith (another great song, still don't own) started playing. Himizu started headbanging, drumming her hands against the steering wheel, and singing along. Usually when Himizu sang, Ryouko thwacked her over the head with the nearest hard object. But instead she let one of her arms trail over the edge of the car and be whipped by the wind as she sang along as well.

Kurama leaned back in his seat. They were driving through the countryside with a long straight road laying before them. The sun shone down on them and the wind felt good. He took off his hat and sat it in his lap so it wouldn't be blown away and leaned back and closed his eyes. It was actually very peaceful. Hiei grunted softly and crossed his arms, looking bored. He watched Ryouko and Himizu sing and laugh. The wind was whipping their long hair every which way and they really didn't seem to care. It was hard to believe that they were about to embark on some sort of mad spy mission that would probably risk all their lives.

A/N: Well, not my best, not my worst. If you have any interesting ideas for more weird missions, feel free to send them in, I am rather flexible. Review please! Ja ne!