Master Hasashi had been gone for a week by the time Cassie asked them to meet up. She tried lightening the mood, cracking a few jokes before trying to explain that "no one is going to kill him", that they understood Hanzo's situation and that while Takeda couldn't visit him he was being treated with respect.
If Hanzo had time to write letters he couldn't be doing too bad, right?
Takeda just nodded, too busy worrying to really be in the mood for jokes. Hanzo was the only constant in his life, and his absence was affecting him more than he'd like. He thanked her once she gave him the letters in her bag, and politely refused her invitation to hang out with the team.
He was his clan's main form of communication between them and the S.F., and these letters could contain something important. One was addressed to him, the other one for his father.
~i~
Takahashi Takeda, if you are reading this it means I am not coming back.
My time had come more than two decades ago, and in my unnatural life I only bring destruction and shame. Although I serve Quan Chi no longer and never will again, Scorpion still lingers in my mind. There are times when I am unable to distinguish the two of us, especially when he whispers of shared vengeance. Ever since Kuai Liang showed me the truth I was unable to rest knowing that he was still free, still alive. I killed Quan Chi fully knowing that there were still people under his control, all because I refused to listen to anything and anyone besides Scorpion.
If I was a lesser man I would claim that I had no choice, that Scorpion controlled me but I used this excuse one too many times. I had a choice, always had, and I choose my revenge above others, above our clan, above my few friends and above the tentative peace Kuai Liang had proposed between our clans.
I refuse to go into hiding.
I willingly let myself be taken by the Special Forces in exchange of the abolition of the charges against the Shirai Ryu. I will ask them to end my life, but if they refuse I will do so myself.
I tire of running from death.
I have left our clan in the hands of Ogawa Ikumi until he finds that you are ready to take my place as the leader of the Shirai Ryu. It might take you years, but I don't doubt you will be a great leader; a better leader than me.
While I rarely said it, I have always been proud of you, and probably will be for the rest of eternity. I would never have admitted to it, but ever since you were first brought to the Shirai Ryu I thought of you as part of my family, as my own son, and guilt plagued me whenever you spoke ill of your father. I did not mean to, but I stole my friend's son.
It is nearly impossible how greatly it eases my heart to know that you are friends. I have written a letter to Kenshi as well, could you be the one to read it to him? … Maybe this is all too much of me to ask. I have more regrets than ink, and setting them all on you would just be another. Just make sure he does get it.
Takeda, do not blame this on anyone but myself. Do not let your father blame himself, and especially do not dare to blame yourself. I dread to imagine the monster I would have become if I didn't have you. What would have happened when I lost the second incarnation of the Shirai Ryu? Were I not have been killed, I can surely say Scorpion would take over me completely. You kept me grounded Takeda – even when I was about to kill Kuai Liang. Without you, I would have killed him and never known the truth about the murder of my wife and son, the disgrace and decimation that my clan faced because of that wretched sorcerer.
Quan Chi… Before his death I dreaded the idea of dying, I can admit. I always feared I would end up under his control again, and this time for certain. But now… I want to rest. I want to see my wife again, hold my son.
Don't blame yourself Takeda, and do not try stop me.
But I need you to promise me one thing: if the elder gods have decided that I must suffer, if I do comeback again… I want to be destroyed. Kill me, Takeda. I do not wish to live anymore. My moments of peace are not worth the destruction my wrath brings. I did what I could by reviving the Shirai Ryu – I do not want to be the one to end its name in shame.
In another letter I have written my will – although I do not own much. To you I leave my chains and a very important task: destroy my mask and armor. Scorpion is bound as much to me as he is to his image – I do not want to be brought back as him, not again.
Do not give him this chance.
~i~
He barged inside the S. F. within the same hour. Every breath felt strained, as if he was being choked by the bony hands of Shinnok himself and sweat stuck to the back of his neck. The chill night wind bit into his face, and he shivered as he ran towards the entrance. Cassie and Jin were already waiting for him at the entrance, their faces not hiding the distraught look in their eyes. He couldn't be too late. He couldn't.
"Takeda? What brings - " Jin began, with lax shoulders and an easy going voice. Cassie wouldn't look at him, couldn't. And he could hear it in their minds. He was late. He was late, he was late, he was late…
"Let me see him." He said once, voice more level than it had been in months, making Jin flinch – he knew what it meant. Takeda wasn't asking.
"Takeda, don't do this… "
"Then let me see him!" With that, he released his whips, the pounding of terror in his chest overwhelming his mind.
~i~
As he walked through the corridors uninterrupted, every mind around waved in and out of his own like white noise – they didn't matter.
~i~
Sonya walked out of the room once she saw him, a hard to read expression on her face with an equally quiet mind. Johnny looked lost, as if he hadn't expected this outcome at all – but when he saw the reason for Sonya's sudden exit Takeda's mind was overtaken bypity.
"Takeda! Kid, I…" For once he was a loss of words, but Takeda could hear each of his thoughts go by faster than a train, each "sorry" and "we couldn't know" grating at his patience. Eventually Johnny's mind calmed down, the man walking over to Takeda before pulling him into a hug – or attempting to.
Takeda raised a trembling hand, not looking away from his commander's eyes as he stopped him in his tracks. "I have to see him. Please." (maybe he was okay, maybe he was just hurt, maybe he was okay…)
Cage nodded solemnly. Takeda was a ninja, raised as an assassin and a telepath to boot - there was no point or excuse to hide this from him.
Takeda had the right to see it with his own eyes, to accept it by his own terms.
~i~
Hasashi Hanzo laid dead, having completely severed his own neck with nothing but his hands.
Takeda knelt by his side, left hand tightly gripping the front of his Master's robes while his right was raised in the air, shaking but very much ready to punch him. (how dare he? how dare he leave him?!)
His hand landed with a soft thud on Hanzo's chest, and Takeda followed, his body crumbling down as his first sob escaped him.
"Why?"
~i~
He didn't refuse Johnny's hug this time, just stood there, tears still running down his empty face. Kenshi came to take him home. (not his home, never his home)
~i~
Every other night he slept, he saw Scorpion rise again in his teacher's body, head stiffly turned to the side. And yet those blank eyes still managed to stare into his, foul intentions clear in his tone as he spoke.
"Don't you miss us? Don't you care about us? Avenge us Takeda."
He cared about Hanzo: his teacher, his mentor, his father. Scorpion's words wouldn't sway him, and he would complete Hanzo's last request.
~i~
A month passed and he still hadn't destroyed Scorpion's armor or mask. He hadn't stepped into Hanzo's bedroom, couldn't dare to do it.
~i~
He was plagued by nightmares, and they grew in intensity, raised questions that Takeda didn't want answers to. They were shaking his resolve, his fragile belief that Hanzo's death would be inevitable after what he'd done. Scorpion talked to him, explained how Hanzo felt, his anger and made it all sound logical.
Hanzo had warned that Scorpion shifted his view of the world, manipulated his thought… but was it manipulating if Takeda already thought it all to be true?
~i~
He asked Kenshi to help him burn Scorpion's things.
They both stood there as heat burned his face, the who of them completely silent as he watched the armored yellow garments turn to nothing but ash.
The smoke permeated his own clothes.
Scorpion's mask glistened as if new, constantly trying to catch his attention. Takeda left without giving it a second glance.
~i~
"Help us avenge him, Takeda."
~i~
He's standing in front of his mirror, Scorpion's mask in his hands.
It looked different, it was different, yet it felt the same. When he had burned the mask all he had done was seal it to him, he let Scorpion taste his anguish.
Takeda let it hover in front of his face, eyeing each curve and indentation the mask had to offer, how it changed his appearance. There was a time where he would go as far as he could to emulate his mentor, how was this different?
His eyes flickered white, and he dropped his, no, Scorpion's mask.
~i~
He started spending more time with the team and on missions, fearing the constant call of vengeance. Hanzo taught him better than this, he would not go the same path as his mentor. There was nothing to avenge, it was his mentor's choice to…
But then why did he feel so cheated? Hanzo suffered enough for more than a lifetime, couldn't he be granted a mistake or two? And Takeda was sure that he could have gotten that chance, if he hadn't chosen death.
But why did he choose it? The world had led him to believe he was a monster, nonredeemable, unforgivable and yet Hanzo was so much more than Scorpion… he couldn't forgive those who made his mentor doubt himself, couldn't forgive the world for being so cruel to him and to his mentor.
~i~
He wasn't aware of his actions until it was too late. A late night trip to the bathroom ended with him tripping on the same mask he'd left on the floor, its golden sheen visible even in near darkness.
Three months and yet Scorpion still plagued him.
But he didn't fight him, afraid to lose the only thing he had left of Hanzo, too selfish to let his mentor rest. For over a decade that man and his clan were the only things he had, and he wasn't ready to lose another person in his life, not when it was Hanzo.
He missed him.
He put it on.