Zim was a bundle of explosive nerves.
On one hand, he should have been happy. The Tallest; impressed with his growth in height, wanted to present Zim with a very capable mate. An Irken elite.
On the other hand, traveling all the way to irk to meet with his potential mate, and the thought of mating at all not only nauseated him to no end, but also inconvenienced him terribly.
His plan to destroy the humans was nearly complete, but the Irken mating cycle had to begin right when all outlooks of his diabolical plan were finally piecing together!
Zim growled, flipping the screwdriver-like object he had been fiddling with at his control desk to its side. He of course didn't want to somehow offend his Tallest by rejecting their generous invitation, but he certainly didn't want to have to mate with some pompous Irken whom he had never met previous to that!
Of course, that's what was expected of Irkens. Only mate with the strongest and the tallest regardless of whether or not you knew them. He knew this, and he also knew how he was after so many years only now considered an invaluable mate since coming to earth had made him grow due to the difference in gravitational force and the amount of oxygen.
He was quite tall, not as tall as his tallest; of course. But still, quite tall.
He tapped his claw-like fingers on the arm of his chair impatiently trying to discover some way out of this horrible debacle. It had not only been the long trip that aggravated him, but the fact that this was his first mating cycle that he would have ever been considered a potential mate.
He would never admit this, but he was nervous.
Irkens didn't, as a matter of fact, need to mate. Irken anatomy had changed so much due to the massive usage of genetic engineering on his home world for so many years, live births were no longer considered a normal or particularly safe practice.
It was true, however that once every couple decades, the primal need for relations with another Irken would surface, this was due to their very ancient predisposition that was once needed so much for the survival of their species.
In fact, at one point in their evolution, procreation was needed so much for the survival of the Irken race that even the males had been given the ability to give birth.
Of course, submission depended solely on the height of the individual and females were easily more favorable, only due to the fact that two male irkens mating could only produce male offspring, never a female offspring. This contributed to a massive drop in female numbers on irk, but was easily fixed when genetic engineering became the norm.
But the thought of Zim mating with anyone made him feel sick. "My Tallest are not fools, however they clearly could never find a partner who is as perfect and flawless as Zim!" Zim cried into the very much empty space of his lab, his voice echoing his name across the metal walls dramatically, his fists in the air triumphantly.
He stayed in this position for over a minute before letting his hands flop back down onto his lap as though they were dead weights, his head dangling cheerlessly.
He was completely engrossed in his thoughts, mourning the idea of having to breed with a lesser Irken but not being able to think of any way out of it, letting his eyes wander across the giant blank computer monitors in front of him.
He wasn't actually looking at them, rather he was letting his eyes pass through them, as though they weren't there. That is, until one of the monitors to his right flicked on in an array of pixelated colors and codes that only an Irken mind would understand.
Zim, unphased by the sudden bright light; lifted his dead hand, tapping what seemed like a random key on his control panel in which the screen of the lifeless monitor responded, switching the seemingly incoherent mess of colors and codes to an air-view surveillance of his kitchen.
Tapping the key adjacent to that, Zim flipped through the surveillance videos from his kitchen to his living room, until he found what he was looking for on his secret bases front lawn. The video rested on a scene of the earth-child Dib, the big-headed boy kicking and screaming as he was getting pulled away by his legs by Zims garden gnome robots.
Zim didn't say anything, but let his eyes fall on the boy, absentmindedly tapping on the key that had brought him to this scene just lightly enough to not completely press it down.
He watched Dib quizzically as the earth pig-stink tried to fight off the robots by repeatedly hitting one with the video-camera he had gripped tightly in his hand that Zim guessed he'd brought to "expose" him with. The gnome took no notice of this all the while Dib was screaming curses on Zims name, swearing that one day he would expose Zim for the "wretched alien menace" that he was.
All of this Zim was used to, until something in particular came out. Zim's antennae perked, and the tapping ceased when he heard Dib yell something to the effect of "No matter where you go, Zim! I'll be there ready to bring you down! I'd follow you anywhere!"
A second later, no less; Dib was getting pummeled relentlessly by the gnomes.
Switching off the monitor, Zim brought his hand closer to himself, raising his other up so that his three fingers all touched their opposites. He tapped his fingers against each other lightly exactly three times as he leaned back in his chair, a malicious zipper-tooth grin spread across his face; eyes narrowed.
"You really shouldn't have said that, Dib-pig." He sang to himself, admiring his own reflection in the now empty computer monitor. "I have a way that you can make that possible for yourself."
And with that, Zim felt like his old self again.
Sorry the chapter was so short, guys! It's my first time uploading ANYTHING on this website, and I was practically fighting with the Doc Manager this entire time!
Please let me know what you think!