She thought back to the time when she and Mulder chased aliens every day.
It used to be normal, sadly enough, something she took for granted, and now
Mulder is gone and she is alone. She remembers new years eve, that sweet
moment when they kissed, so natural it was. They found each other that
night. She runs her hand across her abdomen feeling the life inside of her.
She wonders now, did Mulder know? Did he know he wouldn't come back from
that forest? It was only a week earlier they'd decided to use what they had
had all along, the ova. It was tested, it was hers, now all she needed was
a father for her child, there was no one else she would rather father her
child than Mulder and she didn't ask and he didn't offer, it was just the
way things were. The procedure was done and Mulder was with her throughout
it, holding her hand and reassuring her. They hadn't kissed since new
years. They both knew that they loved each other, words weren't needed. But
thy also knew that their quest was coming to a head and neither of them
could handle it if the other was hurt after… it would be bad enough without
them never being 'together'.
When it was over they could actually live, stop the damn car as she had suggested last year. Was it last year it seemed like only yesterday. And now she was pregnant with Mulders baby and he was gone. They had him. Those bastards that had killed her sister, and pieces of Mulder and Scully that they could never regain. But throughout it all they had each other, now they didn't even have that, but she still felt profoundly close to him. She had nightmares about him she could hear him calling to her and she looked and looked but she could never find him. She had to find him. And now John Dogget, She understood now, he is as she was when they started the Xfiles and now she is in Mulder's place. All the things she's seen have displaced her comfortable paradigms. She shakes herself out of her reverie as a song starts playing on the radio. "Why can't u stay here a while? Stay here a while? Stay with me? Oh All the promises we made…" She recocgnized the song, Promises by the Cranberries. She turned it up to drown her thoughts and went back to her e-mail from Frohike. Still nothing on the radar. She sighed. She'd been periodically going to Mulder's apartment, it comforted her, his life, his smell, it still lingered. She got up from her computer put it in its bag. She grabbed her coat her keys and her bag and left her building. She's become paranoid, her computer went everywhere she went now. She got in her car and drove to Mulders, to feed his fish, she'd told the landlord when he asked. She got to the door and looked at the familiar numbers '42'. She had to stifle the urge to knock. She unlocked the door with her key and entered. She turned on the radio and heard rock music playing, she didn't recognize it but she understood the words. "We've paid the price and now we're both alone and if you call me you'll find me home. I been disconnected someone pulled that plug, oh your so distant.." The song changed. "I been wandering around the house all night wondering what the hell to do, yeah I'm trying to concentrate but all I can think of is you.. Baby when your gone I realize I'm in love, the days go on and on and the nights just seem so long even food don't taste that good.. Things just feel so wrong baby when your gone.." And the tears started again. The soft sobs emerged from Dana Scully and her body shook with tremors. She turned off the music abruptly and fed Mulders fish. She went to his bedroom and saw the same rumpled sheets she'd seen for weeks. She knew she should clean up, but she couldn't bring herself to wipe away the last traces of her partner, her friend, and the most important person in her life. She went to the bed and crawled under the rumpled covers and breathed in deeply the smell of Mulders hair on his pillowcase. She thought of Mulder and of his smile and seriousness and drifted off to sleep. She awoke with a start, someone was in the room with her, and she sensed it. In one fluid movement she was off the bed and had her gun drawn. "Woh Scully! Don't shoot" was the amused and surprised reply. Scully looked but couldn't believe her eyes. Mulder saw the disbelief on Scully's face. "You wouldn't want to shoot the father of your baby would you?" He said trying to reassure her. "How?" She stammered out.
"What's wrong Dana?" Now Mulder was really starting to get worried. He advanced towards her wanting, no needing to hold her. She raised her gun again with fear in her heart and tears in her eyes. "I need to be sure it's you Mulder"
Mulder didn't understand but he would do anything for her. "What do you want me to do?"
"Go to the kitchen." They both walked to the kitchen Scully's gun trained on Mulder the whole time.
"Now what?" he asked.
"Take that small knife and prick your finger with it."
"Oh I get it you think I'm an alien." Mulder said finally comprehending.
"Just do it."
"Gladly!" He picked up the knife and poked his finger with it and showed Scully.
When the small bubble of red blood arose from his finger Scully dropped her gun and sighed. "Oh thank you God!" She whispered.
"Scully why are you acting so weird? And what were you doing sleeping in my bed? Not that I mind except that I thought I'd be in it with you." He quipped.
Scully didn't hear a word of it she didn't care how he got back at the moment, just that he was. She approached him with her hand raised and touched his cheek, to make sure he was real, he was actually there.
"It's ok Scully." Mulder said and placed his hands over top hers on his face. Relief finally swept over her and she grabbed his face and kissed him.
Mulder didn't know why Scully was acting so odd but all his questions were erased from his mind as Scully's lips touched his. The kiss was passionate, demanding. Mulder let Scully control the kiss. She finally pulled away her eyes closed and her teeth biting her bottom lip. When Mulder's breath returned to him he asked, "Scully what the hell is going on?"
"Mulder you've been missing for weeks! Don't you remember the aliens taking you?"
"I think if I were abducted I'd remember."
"Do you trust me Mulder?"
"You know I do."
"Then tell me what day is it?"
Mulder recounted the date. Then Scully told him the correct date.
"What?" Mulder exclaimed.
"You were gone. They assigned me a new partner."
"I'm back so whoever it is better not have liked being your partner too much."
Scully chuckled. "Not likely I've ditched him more than once. I don't know where his loyalties lie but he saved my life and for that I'm grateful."
"Then I'll have to thank him as well. I don't know what I'd do without you. What have I missed anyway?"
They sat down and had a long conversation. Mulder was getting used to having missed days and Scully was getting used to him being there. She couldn't erase the grin from her face.
"Scully I've never seen you smile so much." He said as he touched her lips with wonder.
"I'm just so happy you're back. I thought I'd never see you again, never get to tell you.."
"Tell me what Scully?" he prompted.
"I, I love you."
"I love you too." And he kissed her.
The bed creaked and Scully woke up. Was it all a dream?
When it was over they could actually live, stop the damn car as she had suggested last year. Was it last year it seemed like only yesterday. And now she was pregnant with Mulders baby and he was gone. They had him. Those bastards that had killed her sister, and pieces of Mulder and Scully that they could never regain. But throughout it all they had each other, now they didn't even have that, but she still felt profoundly close to him. She had nightmares about him she could hear him calling to her and she looked and looked but she could never find him. She had to find him. And now John Dogget, She understood now, he is as she was when they started the Xfiles and now she is in Mulder's place. All the things she's seen have displaced her comfortable paradigms. She shakes herself out of her reverie as a song starts playing on the radio. "Why can't u stay here a while? Stay here a while? Stay with me? Oh All the promises we made…" She recocgnized the song, Promises by the Cranberries. She turned it up to drown her thoughts and went back to her e-mail from Frohike. Still nothing on the radar. She sighed. She'd been periodically going to Mulder's apartment, it comforted her, his life, his smell, it still lingered. She got up from her computer put it in its bag. She grabbed her coat her keys and her bag and left her building. She's become paranoid, her computer went everywhere she went now. She got in her car and drove to Mulders, to feed his fish, she'd told the landlord when he asked. She got to the door and looked at the familiar numbers '42'. She had to stifle the urge to knock. She unlocked the door with her key and entered. She turned on the radio and heard rock music playing, she didn't recognize it but she understood the words. "We've paid the price and now we're both alone and if you call me you'll find me home. I been disconnected someone pulled that plug, oh your so distant.." The song changed. "I been wandering around the house all night wondering what the hell to do, yeah I'm trying to concentrate but all I can think of is you.. Baby when your gone I realize I'm in love, the days go on and on and the nights just seem so long even food don't taste that good.. Things just feel so wrong baby when your gone.." And the tears started again. The soft sobs emerged from Dana Scully and her body shook with tremors. She turned off the music abruptly and fed Mulders fish. She went to his bedroom and saw the same rumpled sheets she'd seen for weeks. She knew she should clean up, but she couldn't bring herself to wipe away the last traces of her partner, her friend, and the most important person in her life. She went to the bed and crawled under the rumpled covers and breathed in deeply the smell of Mulders hair on his pillowcase. She thought of Mulder and of his smile and seriousness and drifted off to sleep. She awoke with a start, someone was in the room with her, and she sensed it. In one fluid movement she was off the bed and had her gun drawn. "Woh Scully! Don't shoot" was the amused and surprised reply. Scully looked but couldn't believe her eyes. Mulder saw the disbelief on Scully's face. "You wouldn't want to shoot the father of your baby would you?" He said trying to reassure her. "How?" She stammered out.
"What's wrong Dana?" Now Mulder was really starting to get worried. He advanced towards her wanting, no needing to hold her. She raised her gun again with fear in her heart and tears in her eyes. "I need to be sure it's you Mulder"
Mulder didn't understand but he would do anything for her. "What do you want me to do?"
"Go to the kitchen." They both walked to the kitchen Scully's gun trained on Mulder the whole time.
"Now what?" he asked.
"Take that small knife and prick your finger with it."
"Oh I get it you think I'm an alien." Mulder said finally comprehending.
"Just do it."
"Gladly!" He picked up the knife and poked his finger with it and showed Scully.
When the small bubble of red blood arose from his finger Scully dropped her gun and sighed. "Oh thank you God!" She whispered.
"Scully why are you acting so weird? And what were you doing sleeping in my bed? Not that I mind except that I thought I'd be in it with you." He quipped.
Scully didn't hear a word of it she didn't care how he got back at the moment, just that he was. She approached him with her hand raised and touched his cheek, to make sure he was real, he was actually there.
"It's ok Scully." Mulder said and placed his hands over top hers on his face. Relief finally swept over her and she grabbed his face and kissed him.
Mulder didn't know why Scully was acting so odd but all his questions were erased from his mind as Scully's lips touched his. The kiss was passionate, demanding. Mulder let Scully control the kiss. She finally pulled away her eyes closed and her teeth biting her bottom lip. When Mulder's breath returned to him he asked, "Scully what the hell is going on?"
"Mulder you've been missing for weeks! Don't you remember the aliens taking you?"
"I think if I were abducted I'd remember."
"Do you trust me Mulder?"
"You know I do."
"Then tell me what day is it?"
Mulder recounted the date. Then Scully told him the correct date.
"What?" Mulder exclaimed.
"You were gone. They assigned me a new partner."
"I'm back so whoever it is better not have liked being your partner too much."
Scully chuckled. "Not likely I've ditched him more than once. I don't know where his loyalties lie but he saved my life and for that I'm grateful."
"Then I'll have to thank him as well. I don't know what I'd do without you. What have I missed anyway?"
They sat down and had a long conversation. Mulder was getting used to having missed days and Scully was getting used to him being there. She couldn't erase the grin from her face.
"Scully I've never seen you smile so much." He said as he touched her lips with wonder.
"I'm just so happy you're back. I thought I'd never see you again, never get to tell you.."
"Tell me what Scully?" he prompted.
"I, I love you."
"I love you too." And he kissed her.
The bed creaked and Scully woke up. Was it all a dream?