Disclaimer: Sadly Remus and Sirius still aren't mine.
Please enjoy!!
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Tears of a Werewolf
I miss you since I don't know when and I just can't go on and pretend
That I didn't feel the aching in my heart when you were locked away
Behind these werewolf eyes of mine lie a world of pain and misery
That I try to hide whenever you came near me
Lost years collected from misunderstanding
Wasted years spent walking this Earth without you
Yet I still felt your touch if I just closed my eyes and let myself dream
I thought forever that I was alone, but then you came back to me
I knew too late how wrong I was all these years and that you've been beside me all along
I had my precious moments again when I saw your smile and heard your laughter
I had you back if only for a short while, a light had come back into my dark life
Then you were gone, ripped away so suddenly I hadn't time to blink
But it was those moments that I had you back in my arms that I will remember
A few precious moments given back to me that I will treasure forever
Your desires, your dreams, your pain, your joy – I knew everything about you
I know what I have truly lost and that makes my heart ache even worse than before
It hurts worse than the first time since now I know I can never have you back
Harry doesn't understand what he's lost
Harry didn't know who you really were
Harry doesn't deserve to mourn you because only I knew you enough to be in pain
He can't understand and sometimes I don't want him to because I want you for myself
I hated you for leaving me the first time
I loved you for coming back to me
I hated you for not listening about staying hidden
I loved you for fighting with that passion I always knew you had
I hated you for leaving me again and falling into the Veil
How could you leave me again?
How could you do this to me again?
Why didn't you listen to me?
Why couldn't you have LISTENED to me?!
I am so angry at you!
Why did you have to leave me for good this time?
TELL ME THAT!
Why did you have to be so stubborn and stupid and brave and caring?
Why did I have to fall in love with you of all people?
You left me again and I still didn't get a chance to say a proper good-bye
Merlin, is there even a proper good-bye in a situation like this?
I hate you for leaving me. Did I mention that?
I'm ANGRY and I'm HURT!
I want to hate you but I love you too much it hurts inside
And I want you back again so I can feel your touch on my skin and taste you on my lips
I want to hear you voice telling me everything will be alright
I want to spend endless hours just wrapped up in your embrace again
I want to smell that musky smell that's only you and no one else
I want to see your smile and I want to wipe away that haunted look in your eyes
But I want what I can never have again….and I hate that I know that
But I love you still and I miss you now more than ever
I loved you then, I love you now, and I will love you forever
……………………………………………………………………………………..
A/N: Just something that came to me.
I know it's kind of mean when it's says that Harry doesn't deserve to mourn Sirius, but I read another fic that pointed out a logical fact that Harry did only know Sirius for only about two years, whereas Remus has about twenty odd years on him. Just letting you know. shrugs.