DISCLAIMER: All the characters are not mine. Anything similar to other OITNB fics out there are purely coincidental.

NOTE: So. This is happening. Apologies if I screwed up the timeline. Feel free to leave comments and feedbacks.
Special mention to pratzwrites (check out her fanfics and her tumblr. She's rad) and theinevitablepipex for the inspiration.

They were sitting in bed. Piper was propped against Alex's chest, head leaning onto the empty space of her chest, with fingers tracing Alex's arm up and down, barely touching. She was staring at the muted TV, but her eyes were blank and not registering anything the talk show host was doing. Alex was too engrossed with the book, but she didn't mind the company.

"Al."
"Hmm?"
"Wouldn't it be nice if we have some kids?"

Behind her, the book closed with a loud thud, and although Piper couldn't see it, she knew by habit that Alex's eyes would be as wide as a Pekingese. She took a moment mulling over her thought before turning to Alex.

"Where did this come from?"
Where, indeed.

They've spoken early on in their marriage that they simply didn't have the time and energy for children. But that was years ago. This was a different time, and they're in a different place. Every time Piper would see Finn or Maggie, she would look at them with such longing and would begin to wonder if it would be a good idea to have some of her own. Our kids would rock. That's what Alex had said when she proposed, but suppose that was more of a heat-of-the-moment kind of thing. They've never really brought it up since.

"I had lunch with Polly and she brought Finn and Maggie with her."
Alex reached for the remote and turned off the TV. "I've seen the way you look at those kids. Even I have to admit that they're adorable."

"Seriously, don't you think it would be a good idea?" she turned and was fully facing Alex now, sitting on the brunette's lap. Alex went quiet, but then gave Piper a nonchalant shrug the way she always does whenever she felt like she didn't want to discuss a subject any further.

"No, not really."

Piper could feel her heart dropped to her stomach. Her voice was low, barely a whisper, not sure if she had heard Alex right the first time. "What?"

Alex gave her the shrug again and lifted her finger to fix her glasses. "I've never really given it much thought, but now that you've brought it up…" she shook her head, "No."

"Why?"
"I think we're too old for kids, Pipes. And have you seen the cost to raise kids these days? It's fucking expensive. Plus just imagine all the chaos they would cause. Jesus."
"So that's it?" Piper pulled herself away from the bed and stood up, picking up her blouse from the chair. "You're not even going to have this discussion with me? You're just going to say no?"

"I just don't think it'll be a good idea."

Piper didn't say anything but her eyes were red and her anger had hit the roof. She spotted a pillow on the edge of the bed, grabbed it, and threw it as hard as she could towards Alex. It thumped the bedframe and landed on the mattress. She didn't say anything else and stormed out. Before Alex could go after her, the phone rang.

"Jesus fucking christ," she muttered. How did it go from a peaceful morning to a big fight? When did that happen? "Hello?"
"Is she still there with you? She's late for work." Polly.
"No, your best friend just threw a fucking pillow at me and stormed off."
"Oh, God. What did you do?"
"Long story. Hey, I think I'm kinda in a jam with her. Can we meet for lunch?"
"Wow, you really screwed up, huh?"
Alex sighed and took her glasses of, folding and hung it on her shirt. "Yeah, I think I might have."

That night, Alex got home with a Chinese takeout from Pearl's. She saw Piper sitting out in the balcony, her legs folded on her chest and looking out to the street. She took the food out of the brown bag and placed them on the table. After she'd finished, she walked to where Piper was and called for her. "I got dinner."

"I'm not hungry." Her tone was cold and flat, and if Alex didn't realize that she was being a dick earlier (to which Polly had pointed out), she did right then and there.

But she had her reasons.

"Babe."
Piper's shoulder flinched. Alex walked over and knelt down so she could see her wife on eye-level.

"I was scared." A pause, as Alex gathered her thought. "You know how what it was like for me growing up. My mom worked round the clock. My dad was a shitty son-of-a-bitch who were never there. We were shit-ass broke. I had no one. I had no friends. I ended up being a drug smuggler, and I ended up in prison. I don't…" she grew more and more nervous and all of her sentences had balled up and turned into a big pile jumble of incoherent words and emotion, but she fought it out and put it as eloquently as she could.

"If we have a kid, or kids, I wouldn't know where to begin. I wouldn't know the first thing to do, and that freaks me out just thinking about it. What if I turned out to be a distant parent, like my dad? What if I have to work like crazy like my mom? What if I can't bond with the little guy? Or little girl? What do I do then? What if they end up with drugs like I did? God, no. I'm going to be a total shit at it, Piper, I just know it. And I'm fucking scared because I could break it, even if that's the furthest thing from my mind. I was just… I'm sorry for being a dick. I shouldn't have."

Piper's indifference slowly faded away as she heard what Alex had to explain. Maybe somewhere inside she knew why Alex acted the way she did, but by the end of it this morning she was too pissed and couldn't maintain a level head to proccess the entire thing. Besides, who says things like that out of fear? It sounded straight up like a sentimental novel.

She took Alex's hand and flashed a half-smile, still not fully forgiving Alex. "You're not going to be your parents, Alex."
"I know…"
"I'm not sure you do. Look," she sighed, patting Alex's hands out of habit. "I'm not saying we should get one tomorrow. I'm just saying that we've been together for a long time, and that maybe we can consider putting the idea on the table. If we think somewhere down the road that it's a go, then it's a go. If not, then it won't happen. I'm okay either way, if we're on the same page."

Alex nodded and gave Piper an apologetic smile.
"And what you did this morning is unacceptable. Christ, Al. Why couldn't you have said all the stuff you said earlier?"
"I went brain dead from all the panic, I guess."
"Yeah, I guess you kinda did."

When Alex leaned in for a kiss and rested her hands on Piper's thighs, she didn't resist. "Still pissed at me?"
"Yeah."
Another kiss.
"Now?"
"Slightly better."

And so she gave another. And another. And another.

They decided that Piper would be the one carrying the baby (Alex's words were "I'm more of a stand-by-the-delivery-table-and-cut-the-umbilical- cord type") and Alex would help selecting the donor. Which was easier said than done. Piper received hormone shots, had blood samples taken, and underwent ultrasound to determine whether the ovaries were in good condition. The clinic also taught both her and Alex how to do the injections at home, all the while looking for a suitable donor. "I thought it would just be all touch and go and we'll be pregnant like that." Alex confessed to Polly one day at lunch, snapping her fingers as a gesture. "But it isn't."
"Maybe she should try natural pregnancy," Polly chuckled, and when Alex muttered 'fuck you', let out a loud laugh.

Long as it may be, they finally settled on a donor. Everything was all set and ready to go.
On Wednesday morning, the embryos were planted.
Two weeks later, they got a call from the clinic, telling them to come in for the test result.

"I'm very happy to tell you that your levels are up, which is an indication that you're pregnant."
To which Piper yelped and Alex said 'holy shit' with the biggest grin on her face.

They set up everything relatively quickly and handled things pretty easily, thanks to Polly.

Week 4: the guest bedroom was turned into a nursery.

Week 6: they spotted a beautiful crib on the way home and decided to buy it.
Alex went with Piper to her first doctor's appointment. "Kinda looks like a tadpole," she said, leaning to the monitor. Piper glared at Alex and slapped her arm.

Week 10: the baby already had more onesies than it could wear.
Piper's morning sickness began to kick in and every time Alex would be there, rubbing her neck, giving her water, and handing her tissues when she's finished.

Week 12: They heard the heartbeat and had the first sonogram photo. Alex put it on the fridge door, like you do. She sent a copy to Nichols and Red.

Week 14: Piper kept asking for fresh pizza and donut in the middle of the night, which subsequently left Alex with very little sleep.

On a chilly New York morning, Alex had just got home and brought some groceries when she heard Piper screamed for her, her voice filled with terror. Alex dropped the bags and raced up to the 2nd floor. her mind raced in a panic and her heart felt like it was going to combust right then and there.

The first thing Alex saw was blood.