Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.

Curled up in Jess's arms on the new maroon couch her Grandparents purchased as part of their Christmas gift, Rory wondered what was wrong. With her ear pressed against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart, she traced abstract patterns on his stomach as she filtered through the events of the last two days. The new furniture had arrived on Christmas Eve, accompanied by her Grandparents. A visit which, although a surprise, was enjoyable. When Richard and Emily had walked through the front door, Jess called Rory at Lorelai's for backup. Arriving twenty or so minutes later, Rory was shocked to see Emily and Jess watching the ballroom dancing competition Rory had DVR'd as a joke for Lorelai. Even more amazing were Jess's comments about the athleticism the dancers exhibited as Emily instructed him on the intricacies of the various dances. Richard was ensconced in the library, and Rory had joined him there as they searched for literary gaps in Rory and Jess's combined collection, finding few. Later, Jess fixed the four of them a fantastic dinner, which they ate in the newly furnished dining room. Jess hadn't seem bothered by her Grandparents buying them the dining room set they had been eyeing at Mrs. Kim's antique store, or the couch and other furniture in the library. For once, Emily had restrained herself from taking over, and had instead accompanied both of them on "research" trips as they decided on which styles and colors they preferred. Of course, they had been looking in furniture stores they could afford, and the library furniture Emily picked out was high end designer stuff. The two rooms fit their personalities, classic comfort with the tiniest bit of whimsy. The only negative aspect of the visit occurred without Jess. Emily pulled Rory aside as Jess cooked dinner to talk to her about the speed in which the relationship had become serious. She wasn't condescending, or negative, and she seemed to be accepting, listening to Rory when she assured her this is what she wanted. So it wasn't the visit which had Jess turning inward.

Staring into the cheerful fire Jess had started in the library fireplace, Rory continued to consider what might be wrong. Christmas Eve movies at her mother's house were fun and uneventful. An ordinary movie night, only Christmas themed, with gingerbread house making supplies for snacks. Sure Jess was quiet during the movie, but he was never loquacious, leaving the mocking to the Gilmore girls. And it wasn't a simple bah-hum-bug attitude either. Jess was the one who said they needed more than one Christmas tree. He wanted one in the living room and one in the library. He visited Lorelai to gather a few ornaments which were special to Rory, and went shopping with her to pick out more. He also helped decorate the house, and offered their home up to everyone for the Christmas morning celebrations. Which allowed Gigi and Christopher to join in the fun without it being awkward. No, opening presents with the extended family here was an idyllic first Christmas. Even Liz and TJ didn't irritate Jess, of course he did spend most of his time with Doula, Gigi and April.

It wasn't the gifts they gave or received. There wasn't a single item to or from anyone on its way to be re-gifted. It was a morning of perfects. Jess's gifts to Lorelai and Richard of leather bound copies of Rory's writings earned him a hug from Lorelai and a firm clasp from Richard. And the photo frame Lorelai and Liz put together for Jess made more than a few tear up. It was pictures of Jess and Rory, a few of the two of them, but mostly separate in the same poses, or activities. Reading as children, writing, lost in thought on benches as teens. They were on the same page with their gifts to each other, unexpectedly giving the identical gift. Even the cards they enclosed with the new laptops were similar.

Jess, You have come so far from the angry child, it's time to write about your past. Whether you couch it in a fictional tale, or write your autobiography, I will be here for you when you go back into the dark places. Holding you to the light. Love Rory.

Rory, I don't think you have realized it yet, but you have books in your soul to send forth into the world. I know you have at least one which needs, no must, be released. Now I don't know if you should tell a fictional account of a young, beautiful overseas correspondent, or if you should write a non-fiction book about the violence against women, but you're ready to write about Darfur. And I will be here to ground you to this world as you do. Personally, I think you have three stories to tell, and I can't wait to read them. Love Jess.

No, it wasn't the gift giving here at the house. After the morning festivities, everyone but Chris and Gigi headed to Luke's for Christmas dinner. Everything seemed fine there too, but for the last hour since returning home, he'd been quiet. Not sulky, but introspective as he played with her hair while watching the fire.

"Jess? Sitting here with you, right now, is different. We've always been able to sit together, not talking, and have it be comfortable. So I know there's something wrong, because I don't think you're comfortable. Rule number one was communicate. What's wrong?" Rory asked, looking up into Jess's deep brown eyes. Searching for a clue, watching his expression flatten with every word, before he shut his eyes¸ closing her out.

"Ror, your Grandfather talked to me yesterday, while I was cooking, and at first I was angry. The thing is- I like him. I admire him, and what he says has weight. So today, while I helped Luke cook, I brought it up with him, because his opinion matters too. And now I have to wonder if we broke rule three: start slow. Did this happen too fast?" Jess was scared to open his eyes, to see how Rory reacted. Her voice, soft, yet self assured coaxed him out of his shell, and he looked down at her, holding her close.

"Even before my Grandmother talked to me yesterday, I'd been thinking about this. I was thinking about it right before the accident. What I decided was- we didn't make the mistake of picking up where we left off, although it may seem so to others. The distance forced us to get to know each other again, become friends again. And I can't speak to your thoughts while we were apart, but for me, although you have only been physically present again in my life for four months, once I admitted to myself I loved you, you were never out of my mind. From the very beginning, I knew where I wanted this relationship to go, and I expected it to be harder. Not only because I didn't know if you would be able to open up to me about your past, but because I know myself. I know I take time to process. I shut down when I'm surprised. But I did process this. Restarting something with you, whether you allowed me a second chance or not, was on my to do list from my time in Mexico. I talked to the psychiatrist Luke introduced me to about the possibility of a relationship, my expectations, and reality versus fiction. It took time for me to be ready, but believe me, I processed. And I know you. I know you from your writing, from the snippets Luke and my mom told me. I know you from listening to Doula and April. Even if we had never dated before, I knew enough to feel like I'd always known you, the person you are now. So yes, it's appeared fast for those on the outside looking in, but for me, I've been mentally working toward this relationship with you for the last three years. For me, it seems like this has taken forever," Rory said, before pulling Jess down for a lingering kiss.

"Huh," Jess replied when Rory pulled away.

"Huh? Seriously? I give a heartfelt monologue and you reply with huh?"

"Yup."

"Yup? That's it monosyllabic man! You're going to pay!" Rory said as she attacked his ribs, tickling him into submission. Jess tried in vain to grab her wrists, but the simple defensive moves she had learned overseas, after the incident in Darfur, kept her hands free to tickle at will.

"Stop! Stop! Uncle!" Jess yelled, sinking to the floor laughing as he tried to evade Rory.

"I won't stop till you talk!" she said, following him down, catching him on his escape crawl to the Christmas tree, flipping him over and straddling him, hands in tickling claws ready to pounce. Truthfully, he was an easy conquest.

"Okay, okay! I admit it. I knew where I wanted this to go too. From the minute you walked into Truncheon, I had hope," he said, holding her waist.

"Continue please," Rory replied, wiggling her fingers his direction. Fake sighing, Jess took a moment to run his hands up her sides before settling them back on her hips.

"Before your second visit to Truncheon, I dreamed you. I'd been following your writing from your first Yale piece, and I walked with you everywhere you went. Reading between the lines, dissecting every word. Whether it be a bad ballet or an interview of Obama, I knew the changes you were going through because I could read them, feel them, imagine and see them in your words. I wrote a book based on how I felt reading your overseas stuff. I mean I changed you to a DEA agent, but it was about us. At that time, in those moments, it was us. Matt and Chris accepted you even after your first Truncheon visit because they had gotten to know the real you through my writing, and by reading yours. So I agree. I've walked with you internally for so long, adding the physical component is only another piece. A very, very good piece," Jess said as he pulled her to him, keeping eye contact, kissing her, biting gently at her lower lip before rolling her over.

Propping himself up on his elbows, he smoothed her hair out of her eyes with one hand. In the soft light of the Christmas tree, he undressed her, removing her clothes slowly, caressing as he went, watching the expressions on her face change with each deliberate touch. Standing, he moved to the couch, retrieved a pillow and after tucking it under her head, stood and looked at the picture before him. The Christmas tree lights cast a multicolored glow over her pale skin. Following the line of her body with his eyes, he removed his own clothes. Staring down at her, he didn't think he had ever seen anything so beautiful. He cast his memory for a piece of art or music which made him feel as much, and there was nothing. Only Rory. Looking into her eyes, he saw a sensuous knowledge in them. She knew what he was feeling, her control over him. He didn't know if he had ever been as hard as he was right then, jutting out from his body, if he had ever felt so powerful and helpless at the same time. As her eyes traveled up from his feet to his eyes, he knew the sight of him was having the same effect on her as she shifted her hips to ease the ache. To invite him. Lowering himself down as she parted her legs and raised her knees, cradling him between her thighs, he entered her. Finding her ready, he thrust into her heat.

"God, Rory, you're so hot. I didn't know you could be so hot," Jess said, burying his face in her neck, and trying to find a shred of control. He wanted to plunder her, ravish her. Rory ran her fingers into his hair, and holding tight with one hand, turned his head, finding his lips and kissing him as deep as she could. Open mouthed, pulling him in closer. Eating his moan. Pulling back she kissed his neck up to his ear and unleashed his control with a whisper.

"I love you, and right now I need you." Pulling out till only his tip rested at the entrance, Jess thrust in fast and hard, smiling as Rory moaned against his lips. Pulling out again, even slower this time, he waited a second for her eyes to open before the thrust back in, making sure the friction was in the right place to send Rory over the edge. Keeping the pattern going as long as he could, only Rory's cries to hurry changing his pace, and he was pounding into her, faster and faster as she came, her muscles clenching down on him, driving him to his own release. Shuddering, they rested for a minute before Jess pulled out. Kissing his way down her body, he used her stomach as a pillow as she played with his hair.

"Right now, in this moment, I wish I wasn't on the pill," Rory said as the lights of the Christmas tree blurred above her, streaked by the tears filling her eyes. Freezing, Jess forced himself to relax before turning his head to kiss her belly.

"Part of me wishes the same. What we share seems as if it should culminate in something bigger. And the idea of creating life with you…I can't imagine anything more beautiful. But I also want to wait a little, experience the world with you first. Travel places a child wouldn't have fun visiting. I love you," Jess said moving up and placing soft kisses on her lips, her cheeks, and eyes. Kissing away her tears. Rory giggled, and pulled him in for another kiss, feeling him growing hard against her.

"I love you too, and you're right. I want to wait till after we've been married for a while," she said as she reached down and caressed him.

"Slower this time," she said, basking in the glow of the tree lights and Jess's love.