My entry for RumpleJemima's Musical Contest! I hope the format isn't obnoxious- I've never written a song fic before, so this is all new to me. (The parts that are in italics are still them singing, by the way :) )

It looks like a lot of people are choosing songs from Wicked... Aw well, I can conform to that lol. And yes, I know I took out part of the song- it was just repeating itself so I figured it was pointless.

Read and review- I hope you like it!

At the same moment that Mistoffelees sat down to write a letter to his uncle Bustopher, the Rum Tum Tugger approached Munkustrap. "Hey Munkus," the maine coon had said, "there's uh… Well, can I talk to you for a sec?"

Munkustrap nodded and prepared for whatever needless complaint he suspected his brother would make.

My Dear Uncle,

There's been some… confusion over rooming here at the Junkyard

"There've just been some… rooming problems."

And don't worry; of course, I'll care for Vicky.

"And," Tugger continued, "you'd think I'd be way too good for this… because, you know, I am. I mean, I'm sure I'll be able be able to rise above it." Munkustrap appeared to offer some protest, but the maned tom stopped him. "And yes, I know that's what you'd want me to say…"

I know that's exactly what you'd want. But you must understand, my roommate is just so…

Mistoffelees stopped writing. How did you describe this issue? He began searching for the proper term…

"But you have to understand," Tugger said, "Mistoffelees is just so… unusual… and peculiar… and altogether quite impossible to describe…"

…blonde.

"Tugger," Munkustrap began, "you know perfectly well that during monsoon season the Junkyard is hard-pressed to find new homes for Jellicles. You'll be fine- in a few weeks, it won't matter anymore." He excused himself and left the maine coon standing alone on the tire. However, Tugger wasn't alone for long.

Mistoffelees walked past, carrying what appeared to be a letter, when the tuxedo tom noticed Tugger glaring at him. "What?" he asked angrily.

"I hate you."

"That's funny, because I hate you too. Finally something we have in common." Mistoffelees turned to leave.

"What is this feeling," Tugger muttered, "so sudden and new?"

Mistoffelees heard the tall tom's muted question. Funnily enough, he had been thinking the same thing. "…I felt the moment I laid eyes on you," he said, turning around.

"My pulse is rushing."

"My head is reeling,"

Tugger sighed, irritated. "My face is flushing."

The both stare the other down. "What is this feeling?" they both suddenly exclaimed.

"Fervent as a flame…

Does it have a name?

Yes!"

"Loathing," Mistoffelees finished. "Unadulterated loathing."

"For your face-"

"-your voice-"

"-your clothing! Let's just say-"

"I loath it all!" they both said in unison.

"Every little trait, however small,
Makes my very flesh begin to crawl
with simple utter loathing…"

They both glared at each other from opposite ends of the clearing.

"There's a strange exhilaration
in such total detestation.
It's so pure, so strong!"

"Though I do admit it came on fast-" Mistoffelees sang.

"Still, I do believe that it can last," Tugger interrupted.

"And I will be loathing,
loathing you
my whole life long!"

The kittens, it seemed, had heard the entire exchange. They were suddenly surrounding Tugger. "Dearest Tuggsie, you are just too good," Electra said, clinging to his leg. "How do you stand him, I don't think I could."

They all began to sing in unison:

"He's a terror! He's a Tartar!
We don't mean to show a bias,"

"Oh, but Tuggsie," Etcetera screamed, "you're a martyr!"

"Well," Tugger said, chuckling, "these things are sent to try us."

"Poor Rum Tum Tuggsie, forced to reside
with someone so disgusticified.
We just want to tell you:
We're all on your side!"

"We share your loathing!" they all sang.

"There's a strange exhilaration," Mistoffelees retorted, "in such total detestation."

"It's so pure, so strong," Tugger chimed in.

"Though I do admit it came on fast
Still I do believe that it can last."

Death glares were given from all parties involved at this point.

"And I will be...
loathing
For forever...
loathing,
Truly deeply loathing you…

"My whole life long!" The final note rang out as the Rum Tum Tugger and Mistoffelees belted the last refrain. The maned tom turned away from the conjuring cat and did one of his signature hip thrusts, causing giggles to erupt from the kittens.

"Boo," Mistoffelees said, zapping Tugger's tail with his own signature move.

Tugger jumped a foot in the air and squealed.

Mistoffelees walked away, leaving the kittens to tend to their precious "Tuggsie's" wound. He had more important things to do.