EASIER TO LIE
Chapter One: Here Comes A Regular
She tossed her uniform shirt from the movie theatre onto her bed where it joined a growing mountain of dirty clothes. In her black work pants and a boring white tank top, Alex laid down on her back on the small clean space on her bed, folding her arms behind her head. She didn't want to think, she couldn't be alone with the silence tonight. It had been a whole day almost to the minute when Paige told her she couldn't be with her. In Paige's words "I'm not like this, Alex. I don't like girls."
Alex knew Paige was lying. You couldn't kiss the way they would and not mean something. That wasn't just fun and games. Alex knew what meaningless touches felt like, she had stayed with Jay for three years and it hardly held any purpose.
She wondered why Paige was feeling so ashamed about the truth. Should Alex feel that way? She was never embarrassed by hers and Paige's relationship. Before she could keep hurting herself with thoughts, her house phone began to sing wildly.
"Lexi, honey, can you get that?!" Her mom shouted from the living room. Alex imagined one of the mobile phones was sitting right next to her mom on the couch but, she got up and gathered the other one from the kitchen counter.
"Hello?"
"Alex, hey, it's Marco." Cheerfully, on the other end, he said.
"What's going on?" She mumbled while heading back into her bedroom, closing the door tightly behind her. She could hear loud music pumping on the other end of the music. "You sound like you're at a zoo."
"Close. There's a party on Henderson Highway. Spinner's cousin's house or something, you should come by." He suggested. "There's a lot of people here." Marco had talked to both Paige and Alex after they called it quits and he was mostly concerned for Alex's well being. He didn't her to stay holed up in her apartment for days. That pale skin of her's needed sunlight, he figured.
As much as Alex couldn't stand the silence in her world right now, she really didn't want to go to a party either.
"Nah, I think I'm going to stay in tonight. As much as doing keg stands with a bunch of Barbie and Ken dolls sound."
"Alex, please, come out. I'm worried about you."
"I'm fine, Marco."
"Will you come out for me then? Because I could use back up here."
Alex wanted to say no. She wanted to turn him down but, she envisioned his infamous "Del Rossi Puppy Pout" and she could never refuse that. It was too much.
"Fine. I'll come for an hour but, I get permission to cut out early if it blows."
"Good enough for me!" Marco grinned and gave Ellie a high five since she was standing in front of him. "Ellie's going to drive by and get you, okay?"
"Whoa, Ellie is there? Since when was she all about the party scene?"
"She's trying it on for size. Now, go get ready. No sweatpants." He teased.
Marco didn't lie at all. The party house was overflowing with people that from afar if you stared at the house it looked like it was throwing up drunken teenagers. The lawn had scattered people in different states all over it. Alex and Ellie both rolled their eyes on the way up to the door.
"Let's just find Marco, okay?" Alex told Ellie as soon as they got inside. They held hands to stay together since it was vacuumed sealed tight inside. They made their way through the crowd and noise to find Marco hanging out with Spinner, Jimmy and, much to Alex's unhappiness, Paige.
"Hey, you came!" Drunkingly Spinner threw himself against Alex and squished her in a hug.
"You smell like trash." Alex told him and helped him off of her before walking away.
"Damnit. I'll be right back." Marco swallowed hard and wandered after her. "Alex, come on." He sighed.
"You invited me here knowing she was here."
"We're all friends, okay?"
"No, she stopped being my friend the moment she walked out." Alex corrected him harshly.
"Don't go, come on. This could be good for you." Marco tried to sell the idea of partying but, Alex just wouldn't have it. She rolled her eyes and scoffed harshly. She wanted to run out of the house but, it was too crowded. She wanted to smack Marco but, that seemed far too melodramatic.
"I need a drink." She simply muttered and took off in the opposite direction in hope to find somebody's booze to nab.
Alex impatiently waited behind a young kissing couple in the line for the keg. They looked like freshman and it made her boil with anger to know two fourteen year olds were blessed out over one another and the girl she loved didn't even want to hold her hand.
"Hurry up!" Alex shouted over the line. The guy at the front laughed and stood up straight to look over the heads.
"Hold on, girl. The tap's broken." Jay shook his head to display how irritated he was. "Oh man, Alex?" He broke into laughter when he saw her there.
That was the icing on the cake for Alex. There was no way she was going to bide her time at a party where both Paige and Jay were hanging out. Still, it was too crowded for her to rush out and Jay met her as she was making her way out of the kitchen.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, putting his arm up and leaning against the wall, so she couldn't walk any further.
"Leaving." Alex tried to pull his arm down but, he was stronger than she recalled.
"Come on, I didn't think you'd be here. I heard about you and her. I'm sorry. I know you're pretty crushed out."
"You're not sorry, Jay, so don't say it."
"Lexi, you could clearly use a drink."
"You bet your ass so, get out of my way." She went to walk under his arm but, it proved to be too difficult.
"I've got a mickey," He opened up his jacket a little for her to see the glass bottle of Jack Daniels inside. "Share with me?"
Alex knew how Jay worked. He didn't just give you something without expecting much more in return. Still, she could use something to take the heat off the night and blur her mind if only for a little while.
"Yeah, let's go." She turned around and headed to the back door, so they could drink copiously out on the back porch.
The two ex-lovers, who were really ever only good at hurting each other, found a small spot at the side of the house where they could be alone and drink. Jay found himself kneeling down on the ground with his knees to his stomach, the buzz hit him but, he definitely wanted more. Alex sat against the neighbor's house and polished off the whiskey.
"I want more." She sighed, her eyes fluttering closed.
"Pace yourself, Lex. I've got some 151 in the trunk of my car but, let's wait."
"Since when were you responsible?" She hiccupped.
"I'm going to ignore that comment."
"Were you being responsible when you screwed around with girls in the ravine?"
"When will you put that behind us?" He sighed, exhausted of that subject. He did feel bad.
"Whatever. Let's go get the 151." She pushed her hands on the soft grass and tried to push herself up but, it was pointless. She fell right over and landed in the neighbor's bushes.
"Whoa, slow down!" Jay laughed and jumped onto his feet to help her up.
"I'm fine!" She shouted and pulled her hand out of his as soon as she was back on her feet.
"Thanks, Jay, for the booze and for helping me." He muttered behind her.
"Thanks Jay for screwing everything up!" She shouted while stumbling through the grass and to the front where Jay was parked.
He shook his head and followed her closely just in case she collapsed on the ground. As soon as they managed to get to the front of the house, Jay decided they'd make it to his Honda a lot faster if he carried her.
"Put me down!" She shouted, over and over again, pounding her fists into his back.
"Man, you're a handful." He said as he walked down the street to his car which was parked six houses down. Once they got to where his car was parked, Alex had given up with getting Jay to put her down. He opened up his passenger seat door and shoved her inside. "You need to cool off." He closed the door behind her and went to retrieve the bottle of 151 from the trunk.
Jay opened the bottle once in the driver's seat and took a long burning sip from the bottle. He gasped to let the burn slip out of his mouth with his breath and then handed the bottle over to her.
"You know, Jay, we worked very well together." She admitted as she led the bottle to her lips, ready to get more plastered.
"I know that." He nodded.
"I hate that you cheated on me."
"Me too. I was a lot dumber make then." He confessed, staring down at his hands on his lap. He did look ashamed of what he had done.
"Oh, boy," She sighed and took another sip. "Oh, Jay," She put the bottle down in the cup holder between them. "Don't be sad, Jay. Don't." She mumbled, her lips slathered with Bacardi. "Just be with me again." She mumbled and sat up on her knees on the passenger seat and pressed herself onto him, kissing his lips, hungry for affection.
She knew she still loved Paige, why else would she be pretending she was kissing Paige's neck and not Jay's? But, Paige had made some good points last night. There was a lot of judgment when they were together and things were complicated. So, Alex lied to herself and to Jay and slipped back into him. She could lie. At least, she wouldn't be alone.
Alright, not the greatest chapter, I can admit that but, I've got some big drama planned for the upcoming chapters. Read and review, please. Let me know what you think.
Here Comes A Regular - The Replacements