Ohaiyo
By Sukunami Taka
Free-flowing raven hair blew gently in the wind. A solitary figure paused beside a towering oak, placidly eyeing a blond, long-haired deity, furiously chasing a wailing kid, nimbly skipping out of the way. The heavy shackles on the kid's arms and legs caught his attention. Such strong bonds on so small a kid, he thought indifferent, as his own chains rattled with each movement. His eyes, one of azure blue, the other clear gold, closed gradually and he turned away.
Seated beside a shimmering lake, the half-human half-god, Homura, leaned against a tree and breathed in the sweet scent of flowers, dotting the grassy plains. His dark thoughts remain obscure and the constantly anguished lanky man sighed, while an ivory white fan come flying out of nowhere, whacking him on the head.
Homura was thrown forward, landing face first in dirt. Gritting his flawlessly perfect teeth, he spat out the grime, as Goku runs by. "Ohaiyo, Ho-chan," the always cheerful boy calls out gleefully, waving a small hand. He quickly disappears as Konzen Douji, the highly erratic nephew of Kanzeon Bosatsu, charges up, unraveled golden hair swirling over his evidently annoyed face, his ever-immaculate lavender robe was torn and tattered in places and his feet revealed one missing slipper.
The highly ranked god stopped, panting hard, his violet eyes slanted murderously. Homura stood up painstakingly and walked deliberately over to the over-focused Konzen. He lifted up the fan that had hit him, and brought it down violently upon the beautiful blond head, causing the unfortunate, if-not-innocent, Konzen to fall down hard. Enraged, the already battered deity leaped up, his deep eyes screaming for a killing.
Homura, unfazed, picked up the fan once more and held it out, end side first, to Konzen who snatched it away in a seething resentment. "This yours?" asked Homura, his voice husky, as he lifted a thinly-arched eyebrow. Konzen seemed to be at a loss for words momentarily, then, "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING, YOU BAKA GOOD FOR NOTHING!! HONTORNI KURRUKE SEU, KONO BAKA………!!" barked the extremely livid god. The for-some-reason unbreakable fan was a blur of motion as it was raised again and again, lashing down on the heretic god who was trying to escape Konzen's wrath.
Scrambling for safety, Homura somersaulted backwards on one hand, his booted feet catching the fan and twisting it out of Konzen's clutches. Skidding to a rest, his double coloured eyes narrowed and he responded harshly, " Watashi!?! You lousy cross-eyed can't-even-throw-a-fan-properly baka! Can't you even look after your pet?!? Your stupid fan hit ME!?"
" It wouldn't hit you if you had stop your pitiful moaning and ACTUALLY pay attention!"
"Pi…pi….MOANING!? Then what do you call your oh-I'm-so-bored-I-could-die routine?! A heaven sent revelation?!?"
" Atleast I am bored! Not having some diminutive love affair that is forbidden!"
"And when did YOU start obeying Tenkai's obsolete laws, you always-throwing-paper-airplanes-made-from-official-documents bureaucrat!"
"I unlike you, know the laws, you heretic kept-in-the-dungeon-for-so-long-you-wouldn't-know-what-a-law IS!"
"Oh yeah?! You call yourself the all-knowing, you some-overshadowed-god-that-your-AUNTY-has-to-give-you-a-pet-to-make-you-seem-USEFUL old man!?!"
"OLD? You damn under-ranked piece of garbage! Wait 'till I catch you!!"
"Ha! Try running abit more, you no-brain-blond of senility! Or would you order your servants to do your dirty work?!"
"If it is to kill you, you baka cuss-mouth, I'll do it myself! GOD, for one thing, would APPRECIATE it!"
" So NOW you are GOD's underling?!"
" I am no one's underling! You god-so-ashamed-of relative that even that incompetent creator can't do anything with you!!"
" Like you are doing anything, you little-lover-of- Kanzeon-Bosatsu!"
" Lover?! To that baba!? You turn your fighting technique to nauseating me to death, you juvenile delinquent?!?"
" As if you could actually DIE, you always-around-to-annoy-everyone-else-to-death neko!"
" Who's the neko, you baka kitsune!"
" You have got the wrong anime, you absent-minded deformity!"
"Take a look at yourself, you two-coloured eyes misfit!"
"Better than some girlish lavender eyes that SOMEONE has!!"
" They are violet! VIOLET! You wouldn't know it, of course, with your type of fashion sense! That oversize robe covering that over-slender body!"
"YOU…"
"Ano…komen…..demo…."
"NARNI?!?" growled the two arguing gods.
Poor,definitely innocent Tenpo Gensui sweatdropped and smiled nervously, "Ano….sorry to interrupt you, but Goku is getting restless and his is ….kindda…painting over your study, Konzen……"
"NARNI????????? This is YOUR fault, you darn good-for-nothing!!"
" Say YOU!!! You can't even control your own pet!!"
" Pet YOURSELF!!!!! You baka…"
"You stupid…..
" Absolute idio………….."
Tenpo shakes his head in defeat……staring in disbelief at the two usually reserved deities, yelling at each other like small human kids as they slowly moved off to the neat white buildings. He sighed, and shrugged…
For White Meteor, who wanted more of Homura….