"To be...or not to be...that is the question..." – Hamlet

"Harry, honestly!" Hermione crossed her arms over her chest with a huff. "I can't believe you think that...that..."

"Malfoy is in love with you?" Harry supplied, grinning. Ron guffawed, and choked on his pumpkin pasty.

"You're absolutely mental. Just because he's apparently switched sides to blatantly avoid the dementors in Azkaban, does not mean-"

"Switched sides?!" Ron swallowed. "All our years of Hogwarts, really 'Mione? Malfoy can't possibly be the heir of Slytherin! Malfoy needs to go to Madam Pomfrey, Hagrid, he's hurt! Malfoy is much too young to be a Death-Eater!"

His imitation of the Gryffindor know-it-all became too much for Harry, who buried his head in his hands with silent laughter.

Hermione, however, turned slightly pink, and grimaced at the sight. "You two are unbelievable."

"Just face the facts! That git's been staring at you ever since we got on the bloody train!" said Ron.

Harry finally emerged from the table, his hair even messier than usual. "I didn't even think he'd show up for eighth year."

"Who would show up for eighth year?" said a voice behind them. Ron, who sat opposite Hermione, turned around stupidly towards Luna and Neville, who were in deep conversation beside him.

Hermione and Harry turned the other way. "No one!" Hermione shouted instantly, as Harry replied coyly, "Malfoy."

Ginny raised an eyebrow, and sat in the seat next to Harry. "Well, sorry I'm late...Arnold's been having some issues."

Ron groaned audibly. "You take that thing everywhere...How long is it even supposed to live?"

"He. And at least I could keep my pet for three years without it turning into the grimiest man alive." She retorted. Ron opened his mouth to speak, but Harry beat him to it, flinging an arm around Ginny's shoulders.

"We face a real problem here, Gin." He started. "Malfoy's in love with Hermione."

"Really? How do you know?" she seemed surprisingly unfazed.

"I swear I saw that idiot practically jump out of his bloody chair when Slughorn suggested partners for the potions assignment!" Ron answered enthusiastically.

Hermione stabbed a piece of toast with her fork. "That's ridiculous! He probably just-"

"Oh...no wonder he kept scowling at me when me and 'Mione were brewing the sleeping draught..." Harry added, a hint of a smirk on his face.

"That's kind of sweet." Said Ginny.

Hermione's jaw dropped in disbelief. "How in Merlin's name could that possibly indicate anything?"

Harry shrugged. "Well it was more of a daydream scowl, than the usual I hate you, Potter scowl."

"No, listen!" Ron continued. "He was probably thinking about how you two would be partners and fall in love over the potion."

Ginny giggled. "Our hands touched as we reached for the flobberworm mucus..."

"This year, in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, we would like to present our newest Muggle Studies professor..."

Many groans came from the Slytherin table across the hall, except for one Draco Malfoy, who seemed to glance shiftily over to the front table.

"Gertrude Lerwick..." Professor McGonagall smiled, encouraging a slightly rotund, middle-aged witch with a large blonde bun to stand.

"What the bloody hell kind of name is Gertrude?" whispered Ron. Harry sniggered, and Hermione shushed them both.

Professor Lerwick, now in the center of the hall, nodded politely at the headmistress, and beamed warmly at the students. "I hope you all enjoy my first year teaching here, at Hogwarts. My apologies; I've been quite ill for the past couple of days, so I haven't been able to greet anyone at the Sorting..."

"I hope she doesn't turn out to be another Umbridge..." said Harry, nudging Ginny. This time Hermione turned around stonily, apparently still resentful from their past discussion.

"Now!" She smoothed her hair with one pudgy hand. "As the Muggle Studies Professor, I have decided to implement more Muggle pastimes into this school year. So...I have decided to host Hogwart's very first play."

A small murmur of both agreement and confusion spread around the room.

"No magic involved, whatsoever."

Soon, many shouts of objection and "Rubbish!" joined the students' voices.

"This way, it'd be authentic! As a muggle-born myself, I grew up watching television and films, but I personally think that a play would be a bit more straightforward. As for the ideas, I also thought our..."eighth years" would enjoy coming up with ideas for it as well...I would most definitely suggest reading some plays from around the Muggle world; I've provided some for the library to borrow in between classes."

Professor Lerwick was only met with blank looks, and a few jeers from the Slytherin table, as usual. At the Gryffindor table, it seemed that only Hermione actually found her idea to be a good one. Harry and Ron, however, looked blankly at each other, Ron still trying to figure out the words "television" and "films".

"Well..." There still remained a bit of awkwardness at her response.

"You may all begin your meal!" McGonagall interjected, ushering Lerwick back to her seat with her usual thin-lipped smile.

After dinner, Hermione, Harry, and Ron lounged in the Gryffindor common room, Ron fast asleep in one of the chairs.

"So what do you think about the play, Harry?" Hermione asked, an obvious tone of excitement in her voice.

"Er...what?"

"The play, Harry. The one our new professor started..."

Harry sighed, and ran a hand through his raven hair. "She's not our professor; we don't even take Muggle Studies, remember?...And as for the play...I think it's a brilliant idea." His last words dripped with sarcasm, yet Hermione failed to notice.

"We should go to the library now then!"

Ron stirred suddenly. "I don't wanna..."

'Me either...' Harry thought to himself. Instead, he asked innocently, "Now?"

Hermione straightened in her chair for a moment, and then stood. "Yes, of course! It's only half past eight, and I'm sure we'll be the first to see the selection of Muggle books."

"What about Ron?" He was fishing for excuses now.

"What about Ron? I'm sure he'll be fine lazing off in that chair, dreaming about chocolate frogs and jelly slugs. Let's go before it's too late!"

And with that, Hermione disappeared through the portrait hole. With another dramatic sigh, Harry followed after her.

Author's Note- I hope you guys enjoyed this! I'm planning on taking some elements from Hamlet for this fanfiction. This probably won't be a heavily romantic Dramione, just because Hermione does not reciprocate feelings for Draco (yet), so don't expect a huge make-out scene or anything, lol! Please do review if you liked it, or have any constructive criticism, I would really appreciate it! Thanks for reading. :)