"Mom, I'm going out" I called out to her.
"Where?" Her voice came from upstairs.
"To the woods near school" I replied.
"Okay, be back before it gets dark, I love you" She didn't have much of the 'love' in her voice. The regular chirp was now more categorised as a voice of concern. It didn't phase me much, so I replied anyway.
"Love ya too mom". I don't know why she worried so much, I'm 17 years old. Im practically an adult. Its not like i'd want to stay in the woods after dark anyway.
I grabbed my red beanie and back pack and headed outside. The cold wind against my face was soothing. I always loved the cold. Its a lot less worse than heat. Your body temperature can only increase by 3 degrees and then you die. However it takes around 8 negative degrees to kill you. The cold's basically saving you from death.
The streets were fairly empty. The echo's of my footsteps were the only sounds i could hear apart from the wind of course, it was surrounding me, like the sound was trying to asphyxiate me. I started getting an uncomfortable feeling, like I could sense someone watching me. I scanned around, nobody was there. I tried to speed up, subliminally telling them to back off, if 'they' were even existing in the first place.
Eventually I made it to the woods, my only company being the crushing of leaves under my feet and the bark coated guardians. Their leaves stood out, all a similar colour but individual at the same time. Some were a glowing yellow that radiated the feeling of happiness; others were even a wine-like red, infused with passion and power. The majority were a semi-bright orange, some slightly lighter, some slightly darker. They blended into the crowd, they didn't show any personality, but they gave a warm base fusion for the other leaves to outshine. Which was a beautiful feature nonetheless. The uncomfortable feeling was gone, so I placed myself onto the nearest stump that didn't appear to be housing for woodlice and other unappealing insects, and pulled out my notebook from my backpack. The forest was so barren sound-wise, even the zip of my back pack made me deeply shudder as it ricocheted around the trees. I tried to note other sounds, such as the birds nesting at the peak of the trees, but there appeared to be none. I was truly alone.
I tried to get comfortable and focus on my notebook instead. The click of the pen echoed, screaming out to the emptiness. After a few hours, I found my rhythm. I wrote a few stray lyrics and barely comprehensible drawings. I was lost in my own world, but my trance was broken when i heard a snap in the distance.
My head shot up, like a deer in the headlights. I couldn't see anyone immediately, however when I focused, I thought I saw the silhouette of a person walking towards me. I froze, I didn't know what to do. My heart was fiercely pounding against my chest, trying to pry itself out. It became harder to breathe, like my lungs were also trying to force themselves out of my chest. They could have been just a regular person who happened to be walking in my direction; I could be overreacting like usual. But there was always the chance that they were coming to harm me. It was getting late anyway, and I didn't want to risk it. The light was no longer glowing on the regal leaves, now they appeared dull in the dim lighting. I tried to not make any sudden movements as I got to my feet. They were still walking towards me at a steady, even pace. This is it, I sprinted off in the direction I came, without looking back. The detailed leaves became a blur; moulding into a dense, autumn cloud that traced my every move. It wasn't particularly easy to manoeuvre through the trees, albeit they could hopefully would slow the person in their chase after me.
As soon as I returned to the edge of the woods I halted and almost collapsed trying to catch my breath. All that came out was short pants. I somehow managed to keep my balance and not trip on uneven ground or a protruding branch. My lungs ached badly. I guess I should have put more effort into gym class. I turned to see if they followed me. Luckily there was no sign of them. I didn't want to go back in for a while, in fact, all I wanted to do was go straight to my bed to think over the past events and try to clear my head about it. My breath was still too far ahead to catch, racing ahead at the same pace as my thudding heart beat. Beads of sweat began to pierce my brow as I worriedly speed-walked home. Hoping I would suddenly grow a new set of eyes on the back of my head. That way, my neck wouldn't be aching so much from watching my back.
Still, I was extremely cautious and paranoid when returning home, but it wasn't long until I made it back. My mother greeted me as I walked in, but, I ignored her. I had so much on my mind, I just wanted to sleep so I could finally stop thinking. I peeled of my shirt, it was soaked with sweat from running. I definitely need to put more effort in gym class. I collapsed on to my bed, I was exhausted but the person I saw was plaguing my mind. I kept squirming uncomfortably. The longer I thought about it the more paranoid I got. What if they followed me home? What if they're waiting outside until I go to school, then they'll kidnap me and take me to an abandoned warehouse and torture me? What if they're in my house, waiting for me to go to sleep? What if they're in my room watching me? I was too scared to move, too scared to open my eyes. I tried to hold my breath, and listened out for any movement. It relieved me slightly when I only heard silence.
I must have fallen asleep not long after that, as my old alarm clock woke me up instead. I normally woke up naturally. I pushed it aside, just a bad night I presumed. My worries about the figure had almost disappeared. It wasn't long until I had to start walking to school; so I skipped breakfast and showered instead. I kept my back pack, but i skipped the beanie and chose completely different coloured clothes to wear. I didn't want to be right but if that person is there, I don't want them to recognise me.
My legs were aching badly from yesterday. I made my way upstairs slowly, as to not strain them any further. My mother had already left for work and my brother also appeared to have started his journey to school. I snatched a can of Dr. Pepper from my brother's stash- he's not here to prove it was me- and headed out.
The walk to school was always quiet. I guess I just live on a quiet street. Everyones content with watching each other from a distance rather than actually conversing. Nothing much happens, the most active thing here is probably my mind. I can never stop it from wandering. It finds places I want to forget, and places I wish never existed.
"Hey Tyler!", I jumped out of my skin and let out an embarrassing squeal, almost karate chopping the unidentified person in the face. I realised it was Pete Wentz. Probably my best friend, he was one of those people you love to hate, but you cant help but love. He pushed his hair delicately out of his face and semi-marched towards me with one of the widest grins I have ever seen, plastered on his face.
"I swear to god Mikey almost kissed me yesterday, do you think he's gay?" Oh yeah, i forgot to mention, he practically radiates bisexual. Spend over ten minutes with him and you'll be throwing up a rainbow in no time.
"Pete get your head out of your ass, Mikey is totally straight" He began to jog to catch up with me. School was about a two minute walk away and we had fifteen minutes left, so we didn't have to run.
"I know what i'd rather have in my ass" he smiled. He was pretty annoying sometimes, but you gotta respect him, being so bold when he's the only out person in our school. Im straight, i always have been and always will be. I haven't had any girlfriends but i've not really been interested enough in anyone to care. Everyone else in school prefers to determine my sexuality for me, like it's clearly their business.
The rest of the walk consisted of silence and some small talk until we arrived. The cinderblock torture chamber, also known as school. I sighed and kept my head down while walking in. I wasn't necessarily bullied, but some people seemed to get off from giving me a rough time. Karma will work eventually, and I know it will be me to execute it. Pete seemed to not care, he was too confident and laid back. I'd do anything for the confidence he seemed to hold with ease, but I doubt I could ever be so oblivious to other people's opinions.
We had different classes first period so we said our goodbyes at the entrance. I hated being late, so I made my way to math early. Nobody really hung out around this department so I'd normally have about ten minutes to myself. However when I got there, there was someone in my usual place. I was shocked at first, before realising that there was about a 1000 people in this school and everyone had the right to be there if they wanted to be. I couldn't decide whether to turn around and take a lap or two around the building until just before the bell goes. But then i'd probably be late and I cant deal with a whole class silently judging you. I was undecided until I saw them look straight at me, they smiled and I had no choice but to walk over now.
Their smile brightened as I got closer.
"Hi" their smile continued to grow wider. I was surprised when it didnt grow to fill her entire face like the cheshire cat.
"Oh...uh, h-hi" wow Tyler congratulations, 10 points to sociallyawkward-dor.
They didn't seem to be phased by my awkwardness though. In fact, they seemed to sympathise for my lack of social skills, which wad relieving.
"Are you new here? I can escort you if you want" they didn't stop smiling still. I started to be concerned, their face aching by now? It mustn't be comfortable.
"No, uh, i've been here since the start" I laughed awkwardly and scratched my neck. I didn't know what to do with my hands so I clenched onto the hem of my shirt.
"Oh, oh my god, i'm so sorry, i've never seen you before" they finally stopped smiling and their face changed into an apologetic expression. Now it looks weird when they're not smiling. They look a lot prettier when they smile. Attractive, actually. The crinkles under their eyes weren't particularly appealing, but showed a history of happiness, care and a generally enjoyable life. Like they never thought about it ending. Their top lip always raised like a curtain, showing a glimpse of their unnaturally bleached teeth, matching their hair. However, they did manage to incorporate it well with their partially tanned skin.
"Oh, its fine, don't worry about it". I laughed awkwardly again, which in turn made them smile again. I felt at home when they smiled. It was like a comfortable log fire in the middle of the snow storm, you wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
An awkward silence plagued us. Although their smile didn't halter. Should I say something, or wait for them to say something? I need to think of something quick.
"I like your jacket" well, I didnt fuck up as much as I thought I would. By now people were usually laughing at me or felt uncomfortable.
"Thanks, it's my boyfriend's letterman"
"Youre dating someone on the football team?" The corners of their mouth retreated. Like i was mocking their status in this school. I smiled back, trying to hint that I wasn't intending to offend, but they mustn't have noticed.
"Yeah, we've been going for a few months now" they muttered, concentrating on a singular aglet on their lace. Not wanting to reciprocate the eye contact.
"I don't know why I got so surprised I'm sorry, you're really attractive" the last part just blurted out. Top scorer for sociallyawkward-dor, Tyler Joseph, thanks Dumbledore.
"Well you're quite cute too. But I'm taken, so sorry" they began smiling again. I started to notice the smaller details, like the fine light hairs that were barely noticeable above their top lip. Or the dirt ritten pores that decorated the edges around their nose. Not many people would have noticed them, but I could see redness around there, like they was too insecure to leave them be. They were just like everyone else. Unsatisfied. They wanted to improve them self.
"Oh I don't wan-" before I could correct them the bell rang and crowds of people seemingly appeared out of nowhere. By the time I had turned around they had already walked into class.
This lesson is already incredibly boring. I was practically falling asleep, but my head shot up when the teacher told me "start writing, Joseph!" I looked around and everyone was already half way through a sheet that I didnt even know was placed right on my desk. Crap, I've gotta start writing. Ugh, I dont have a pencil! I looked around again. I didn't want to disrupt the lesson and have everyone stare at me. Expressionless faces and canvases of heaped strands were the only recognisable objects in this room. But when i turned right i noticed someone familiar.
"Hey" I whispered, barely audible. They didn't notice after a few tries, so I threw a random page of scrunched up paper from my notebook. Finally, their eyes pierced into mine, they looked slightly angered that someone had disturbed their peace at first, but they smiled when they recognised me.
"Can I borrow a pencil" I asked quietly. Nobody had turned around yet so that was a good sign.
"Sure" they mouthed, meekly placing a pencil on my desk. This time I was the one smiling. I tore out another page and scribbled on "whats your name?" and threw it on their desk once again. It rolled slowly upon their work. Making a soft knocking sound. The teacher rose his head to look at me, but shortly lowered it again when he realised it was nothing to be concerned about,
They opened it and smiled before scribbling a reply and throwing it back. They put their head down and focused back on their work. I decided to leave them alone after that. I opened the page and looked down. Huh, that's a really cute name.
Jenna.
AN: Thank you so much for reading. It means a lot to me. If you have any questions I'll always reply :)