Endless Gravity

It's done. It's finished, Erik thought while walking quickly to his car, which was parked a little ways away from the Daae's house so as not to draw attention. His thoughts were fixated on how he had felt when placing the letter in Christine's vocal haven.

It wasn't a vocal haven, though. No, Christine obviously hadn't wished for it to be such a place. It made him wonder... Does she still sing? Or has she given up her radiant instrument? The very thought was heart breaking. But, his heart was already damaged beyond repair, so what was one more sad thought?

He made it to his Jaguar and got in, his chest feeling heavy. Slowly, he started the ignition, but he refrained from driving away. His eyes couldn't move from Christine's house, and he couldn't stop his thoughts. She is probably asleep right now. I hope you have pleasant dreams, my sweet angel.. Then, he let out an angry growl. I am not to think of her! I drove hours in order to give her the letter, and I am now supposed to drive away and never think of her again. That is supposed to be the plan! Sometimes, though, things could not go according to plan.

Erik's broken heart was telling him that something had been left unfinished. What am I supposed to do?! I cannot go near her, I cannot see her, and I most certainly cannot continue to sit here! If I am caught, then her last wish to me will be ruined. I cannot allow it to happen.

So, he began to drive, but his mind wasn't at all focused on the road ahead. I am in no state to drive. If I were to have a wreck, that too would destroy her wish. He sighed helplessly. What am I to do?

Of course, Erik knew of various places he could park his car and calm down without being noticed. I suppose I should.

He drove to a wooded area where a rarely used parking lot was and turned off the engine. Then, he leaned his masked forehead against the steering wheel in order to bask in his depression. What is the point? he thought, referring to his own life. Why must I continue to go on this way? He knew he deserved to suffer, but would it not be better to just die and go to hell?

You live.. for her, a voice in his head whispered. Moaning, Erik shook his head against the steering wheel, trying to escape the truth of the matter. I am a fool! To live for her is meaningless! Really, though, he didn't believe that. Long ago she had stolen his heart, and although she had forced him to take it back, it would still forever be hers. I'll love you endlessly...

Somehow, Christine was able to fall asleep that night, even after reading Erik's letter. It was now the following morning, a Sunday, and she awoke slowly, still feeling groggy. Memories of reading the letter immediately reached her mind, and she lay still thinking about it.

'I am not the same as I once was.' The letter's words replayed through her mind, and she couldn't help but wonder.. What's he like now? Now that it's been a year, I wonder how he's changed. What does he do everyday? Christine placed her hands behind her head and stared up at the ceiling. I shouldn't give a damn, but I do. Is it wrong that I can't forget him?

Memories of the past sped through her thoughts. Meeting him for the first time, him saving her from that attacker at the bank, working for him, voice lessons... For the past year, Christine hadn't been able to remember one good thing about their time together. How could I have forgotten the times before he kidnapped me? Well, even then, before he'd committed the crime, he had scared her. The way he treated her, the way he talked to her, and the looks he gave her had definitely confused and frightened her. But there were good times, too.

Christine could remember a time when going to the mansion was fun. Through working for him and voice lessons, she had really come to feel comfortable there. That was before he made the biggest mistake ever, though. Once he forced her to stay in the mansion, she began to despise it. The bedroom he'd locked her in would always haunt her.

Now that she was recalling everything, though, she couldn't stop herself from feeling some fondness for the mansion. She shook her head. Why am I even thinking about this? Last night I realized that I could finally move on, so it's time to.

Today, she would go back to her apartment and continue living her life. Dad, school, and friends. Yeah, that's all I need. Christine stood and began getting dressed. Then, she packed her bag and left her room in order to say bye to her dad and leave.

Erik awoke and was temporarily confused. Where-..? He sat up and looked around seeing an empty parking lot with acres of woods surrounding it. Oh.. He remembered. Oh! Damn it all to hell! Panic swept through him. It was morning.. That meant he had fallen asleep. The last thing he remembered was leaning his head against the steering wheel to think everything through. And I fell asleep while doing that? I am an idiot!

He needed to leave.. now. What if someone were to see him? What if the police were to find him? They knew the appearance of the man to look for, but did they also know the appearance of his car? It was very possible that Christine had told them... But, thinking about it more closely, Erik knew she wouldn't have. Her final wish was for him to leave and never return. She most likely would not have given the police information on his vehicle, for that would completely reverse her wish. Though, there was also Nadir.. The man definitely knew the appearance of his Jaguar. However, did he know the license plate number? Part of Erik doubted that while another part of him remained unsure.

Should I risk leaving now? There was always the chance of someone finding him, though, whether it be morning, afternoon, or night. Perhaps it should not matter. Perhaps I should take my chances.

Minutes passed. He wasn't moving. Why wasn't he able to leave? Thoughts of the previous night entered his mind. Something has been left unfinished... Erik banged his fist against the interior dashboard. What? What in god's name could be unfinished? His eyes examined the woods outside as he carefully thought about it.

To see her isn't possible, so clearly, that cannot be what I wish to do. Well, to be truthful, he always wished to see her, if only for a moment... But he couldn't think that way. Thoughts of one year ago entered his mind. I kept her locked in my mansion for days. My mansion... He thought about each room remembering every detail.

A slight smile came to his masked face as he continued to remember the home he had once resided in. It had, at one time, been very precious to him. There were good times spent in its rooms. And he had left it so easily, taking Christine with him. How could I have done that? There was a time when the mansion served as his most prized possession. He could remember that. He remembered designing it, making sure everything was absolute perfection. The mansion really had been his, through and through.

It is no longer mine, though. Who knew what had happened to it? It could have been destroyed for all Erik knew.

To see it one last time would be nice. To see a reminder of my past life might be the key to letting that life go. That was it. That was what was left unfinished. He needed to see the mansion. And now that he'd thought about it, there was no way to sway his actions. I will see it.

With that, he started the engine of his Jaguar and drove towards the place he had once called home.

Christine started the engine of her car and pulled out of her driveway, waving to her dad who was standing at the front door. Now, she was off to her apartment. School had just started, yet she already had homework to do. She needed to go to the grocery store with Meg, too. There was much to be done, and she was determined to make sure her tasks distracted her from every other thought.

She stopped at the stop sign leading out of her neighborhood and then took a left. She drove in silence, refraining from listening to music. And it was during the silence that her thoughts returned to Erik. Who am I kidding? I can't stop thinking about him. Maybe I'll never be able to stop thinking about him. That was worrying. Is there not some way to make it all disappear? Some final thing I can do that will allow me to let go?

A very familiar traffic light was ahead, and the light turned red. Christine stopped and thought about why the traffic light was so familiar. This is where you turn to go to the mansion... Yes, the mansion reentered her mind. I wonder how it looks after a year. Is it still even there? She assumed it was. Who lives in it now? Anybody?

Hmm... An idea suddenly entered her mind. If I were to see the mansion one more time, perhaps it could be a way of letting go of the past. Before she could think about it further, her hands steered her car to the right turning lane. I guess it's worth a try..

Erik drove past the mansion and parked on the side of the road a little ways beyond it. His eyes couldn't leave his old home as he parked the car. He got out quickly and looked every which way making sure he wasn't calling attention to himself. Luckily, the mansion was in a secluded area of town. There weren't any homes or people around.

As he walked towards the mansion's driveway, Erik noticed that it looked abandoned, like no one had lived there in quite some time. A year, I assume.. He moved stealthily, though his eyes were transfixed upon his old home. He hadn't realized how much he'd missed it. Of course, the bad times that could have been avoided prevented him from missing it too much. Christine had spent the majority of her kidnapping in the very place he was looking at.

But there were good times, too. His office. He would always remember his office. It held his piano, it held many of his designs, it held a number of his most prized possessions, and it had been the room where he'd first seen Christine.

Along with everything else that was entering his mind, so was Ayesha. My dear pet. I neglected you. Erik nearly broke down while thinking about it. His feline had once been so precious to him.. He'd forgotten her. He'd abandoned her. Was she alive? ...Or dead? He could only hope Nadir had taken her in and was caring for her.

His thoughts were so overwhelming. They nearly made him turn back, but... I deserve the suffering that is brought about by these thoughts. Yes, he deserved the grief, the sorrow, the guilt..

He reached the garage and simply stared at it while remembering a time when Christine had attempted to hide from him in there. His sick, twisted mind had assumed she was playing a game. Erik shook his head while remembering such insanity. He walked towards the back of the mansion observing the changes that had been produced by a year of absence. The yard was no longer well-groomed. The grass was long and unkempt and there were weeds most everywhere. The mansion itself looked... dull, lifeless.

After a few minutes of walking around and peering through windows into emptiness, Erik began to wonder why he had come at all. There was nothing special about this place. There were no signs of a previous life. There was just.. nothing.

That was when he heard it- the sound of an approaching car. Erik instantly clung to a wall of the mansion and stopped breathing trying to stay as invisible as possible. His heart was beating quickly. Whoever it is is bound to have seen the Jaguar. So this is to be how my freedom ends... Part of him was ready for this and had been for a year. But, the other part of him couldn't stop thinking about Christine's wish and how it was about to be destroyed.

His mind quickly went through all of the details of his coming arrest. One thought stood prominent. There will be a trial... I will see Christine again.. He found he couldn't help but long for it to happen.

Christine's car reached the intended road that the mansion was located on. Her heart was pounding, and her hands were sweaty. Her feelings were overwhelming, to say the least. She was nervous yet eager, a little excited yet completely terrified.

The closer she got, the faster her heart beat. Perhaps she would have a heart attack before she reached it.

Then, suddenly, her eyes focused on a car in the distance, which was getting closer as her car moved forward. At first, she was puzzled. The car wasn't parked in front of the mansion. It was parked in the middle of nowhere, it seemed. How strange.. The more she looked at it, the more her eyes widened. That's not just any car... She blinked a few times to make sure it was real, because she knew exactly who that car belonged to. Erik's here?

It didn't come as too huge of a surprise, though, which she was thankful for. If too much surprise had hit her, who knew how she would react? But, since she found his letter the previous night, which had obviously been left in the very recent past, it wasn't too surprising that he was still here.

But here? At the same time as she was? It was enough to put her into a state of complete and utter fear and panic. She was about to make a 180 degree turn and forget this ever happened, but, well... she couldn't. The oddest feeling ever was taking over her body. 'Courage'. She hadn't felt courageous in over a year. She wanted to know... No, she needed to know why he was here. Sure, the letter had explained that he wanted to apologize, but what had caused him to break his promise? He'd said that he would never come back, yet here he was. It was just wrong!

Christine found she was becoming angry, as well as courageous. Both feelings were so foreign. Nevertheless, she pulled her car into the mansion's driveway, her eyes narrowed while searching for him. He had to have heard a vehicle approaching, so he was probably hiding.

She put the car in 'Park' but didn't turn off the engine as she unbuckled her seat belt with a shaky hand and got out. If things got ugly, at least it would be easy for her to get back in the car and drive away. She didn't even close the car door.

Her legs and hands were shaking terribly as she began to wonder what in the hell she was doing. What am I thinking? I'm actually looking for Erik! Am I insane?!

Erik was in a paralyzed state against a wall of the mansion in the backyard. The car's engine was still running. He'd heard a car door open. Whoever it was had decided to get out. It wouldn't be much longer now...

Time passed as he continued to stand unmoving. Curiosity was beginning to seep in. Who could it be? The mansion is deserted and probably locked, so the person is here for another reason besides going inside. And now that he or she has seen my car, they must be searching for me, the invader. Yet, nothing was happening. All was silent, besides the sound of the car's engine.

Slowly, Erik slid against the wall towards the left side of the mansion. He wanted to know what was going on, and the only way to do that would be to see who was there. Eventually, he made it to the edge so that he could peer his head around the corner and see. He did so incredibly slowly.

His head left its hiding place, and his eyes immediately met the eyes of her. It was... abrupt. So abrupt that Erik felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. The breath left his body. His eyes were unblinking. He was a mere statue, frozen in time caught in her vision.

She was looking directly at him. He was looking directly at her. Time stood still as they stared at one another.

It didn't take long. In fact, Christine was surprised by how quickly she found him, but there he was peeking around a corner, just as mysterious as ever. Their eyes met, and she found that she could barely breathe as she stared into the eyes of her kidnapper.

Memories of their past came crashing back to the surface. It was almost too much to bear as they came without warning or a moment's pause. How they met, how they got to know each other, seeing him at Sonic, the bank robbery, waking up in his mansion, working for him, singing for him, leaving him, thinking he was dying, coming back to him, leaving him again, being stalked by him, the car wreck, being kidnapped by him, and the entire kidnapping...

"Why?" The word left her mouth effortlessly in the form of a soft yet direct demand.

He just continued to stare. Had he even heard her?

"Why?" she repeated.

He blinked. Yes, he'd heard. Christine watched as panic entered his features she could see that weren't hidden by the mask. She would wait for him to calm down. Strangely, she was feeling rather calm.

'Why?' The question repeated itself in Erik's mind countless times as he continued to stare at her. This moment... He'd dreamt of seeing her so many times, but to actually see her. It was too much... She'd asked a question, though. The angel had spoken.

The mere reference of 'the angel' caused Erik to panic. She was here, right in front of him, watching him, waiting for him to answer, looking as beautiful as ever.. Shit, he inwardly cursed. This was actually happening. She was there, he was there. They were at the mansion, just like they had been a year ago. But now, everything was different.

"'Why?'" He questioned the question, his voice unused to speaking.

Erik watched as her head tilted to one side. What on earth was she thinking? Then, she spoke again. The angel spoke! "Why are you here?"

Feeling the reality of the situation kicking in more and more, Erik found that he could ask her the same question. Not yet, though. "I-"

He couldn't even say whatever he was about to say, because she interrupted. "Why in god's name are you here? And that letter. Why? Just why?"

Christine had gotten the letter! His eyes widened. "You read it," he whispered. He still had yet to move from his place behind the wall. His head was still peeking out.

"Yes, I read it," she affirmed. "Why did you put it in that building? What was the point? To apologize?" Her fists clenched then. "You think apologizing is enough?"

She wasn't yelling. Actually, her voice was soft. But, the emphases on certain words was well established. Her meaning came across perfectly. "No," Erik replied while still inwardly panicking. "No, an apology could never be enough. That was not my intention." What was your intention, Erik? Tell her! "I gave you the letter in hopes that I could... forget you." He still couldn't believe that he was actually talking to Christine. Here. Like this. It was unbelievable.

She looked away, as if physically struck. "But, you broke your promise.. You came back when I told you not to." Looking at him again, she boldly said, "Don't you realize how stupid that is? You could be seen."

Erik now felt incredibly foolish. His head lowered in shame. It was the first movement his body had made. "You're right," he said. What was I thinking to come here? And yet, he found that he didn't completely regret his actions. Numerous daydreams had actually come true in this moment. He was looking at the young woman he loved. And more than a moment had passed, which was more than he ever could have hoped for. "I should not be here." Still though, he couldn't move. His eyes quickly found hers again, as if a magnetic force was attached.

She shook her head slowly. "No, you shouldn't be here... Yet, you are here." She paused and took a deep breath. "This is so.. weird."

Those words were the only words that could even begin to describe this situation. Erik didn't speak.

There were so many things she wished to say. So many thoughts were going through her mind. To see him, to actually be this close to him was mind boggling. Every emotion threatened to consume her, tears included. But, letting tears fall was out of the question. Erik might have claimed to have changed in his letter, but she was sure he could change right back to his insane, manipulative self if he saw any weakness in her. It was nerve wracking enough that she was actually alone with the man.

And damn it, why wasn't he speaking? Why wasn't he apologizing? Even though an apology wasn't enough, he could at least give it a try. "Isn't there anything you want to say?" she finally asked, her voice louder than it had been.

"Yes," he replied without hesitation, which caused Christine to blink. "Christine, I cannot believe-..." He didn't continue what he was saying, but she knew what he meant. He couldn't believe she was actually there. She couldn't believe he was there, either, so at least they agreed on something.

"I-I kidnapped you," Erik began again. "I cannot take it back, although I wish I could. But, you must know that I would never do it again. Please Christine, believe me when I say I have changed."

Erik was acting so desperate. It was completely unlike the 'Erik' Christine once knew. And yet, this was part of the 'change'. She could see that. "I see that you have changed," she told him.

"Thank you," he whispered emotionally.

"Sure," Christine said awkwardly. She shifted from foot to foot. "So, you wanted to come here today." She looked around before looking back at him.

"Yes, it seems we both did." They stood quietly for a few moments. Then, Erik moved so that Christine could see all of him instead of just his masked face.

He was as tall as she remembered and just as dark. His hair had gotten longer, she could see. And, if she didn't know any better, she could have sworn he was skinnier than he had been a year ago.

"I-I suppose..." he mumbled.

Christine could tell he was fixing to leave. But it seemed too soon. Wasn't he the least bit interested in what was going on in her life? I guess I'll never know... "Yeah, I should probably head back.."

Becoming curious, she asked, "Why did you come here today?" And why did we come at the exact same time? She found she didn't really want to analyze that further.

"In order to let go," he replied. "I need to try to let go..."

Christine was shocked. His reason was the same as hers. She wouldn't let him know that, though. "Oh. Well.. Um, I hope it worked." She felt stupid saying that, but it was true. She didn't want Erik to suffer any longer. That is, if he had been suffering at all for the past year. She imagined he had been.

"Goodbye, Christine," Erik said slowly.

She watched as he walked towards her and became a bit nervous until he continued past her, as if she wasn't even there. Turning, she watched silently as he walked away. Once she couldn't see him anymore, she whispered, "Goodbye.."

Christine walked back to her car thinking of everything that had just occurred. She'd seen Erik. She'd talked to him.

Maybe it was a good thing she'd seen him, too. She was able to see first-hand that he really was different, which helped her a lot. Also, though, Christine liked to think that maybe this meeting had helped him. Perhaps he would be able to move on and let go.

...Even if she couldn't. I can't forget him. I don't want to. She truly didn't know why that was, especially after everything she'd been through. But, she'd come to accept it.

In the midst of it all, Christine wondered- How was it that we both ended up coming to the mansion at the exact same time?

And also- Will I ever see him again? It might be nice to see him again... Maybe in a few years.

There were a number of questions that had gone unasked and unanswered. Erik wondered so many things... How is she? What is she doing with her life? Is she in school? Does she socialize often? Does she still sing? A year ago, he would have hoped that her answers would be to his liking. Today, though, he only hoped that whatever she chose to do with her life made her happy. It was her choice. He understood that now.

And so, he would return to the cabin in Tennessee with one good memory that would hopefully outweigh the bad. To have seen her again would be enough to help him lead a normal life. Perhaps he would return to music. It seemed possible now, whereas before it hadn't.

All the way home, though, he would wonder- How is it that we were able to meet today? Deep down, he hoped that fate had played a hand in it.

Also, deep down, he had to admit that he hoped he would see his only love again someday. To be in the presence of his angel, if only for a short time, was enough to keep him alive. As always, he lived for her.