KK:(jumps on Murdoc's lap and hugs him)HAPPY BIRFDAY, MUDSIE!
Murdoc:Oi, get offa' me!
KK:(only hugs him tighter)Nope! I gotta hug you for every minute your age is. It's a birthday tradition.
Murdoc:Y'mean, I gotta be 'ugged for 40 fuckin' minutes!
KK:YEP!
Noodle/2D/Russel:(about to crack up)
Murdoc:(glares at the three other band members)YOU. ALL. GO. DIE.
KK:Watch out, guys; you're next.
Noodle/2D/Russel:Crud.
(PS- If you love Gorillaz, you'll comment on this story. GOT IT?)
June 6th, 2006:The Big Day
"Adria, why do we 'ave t' go back t' the States?" Murdoc groaned to his girlfriend as he collapsed on her bed.
Adria Garrison, now age 24, looked at the Satanist and shook her head in disgrace as she placed a few of her T-shirts into her large black suitcase. "I told you a billion times, Muds. It's to see my buddy down in New York."
Murdoc slightly sat up and glared at her with both anger and annoyance. "An' jus' t' celebrate m' birthday?"
"Your fourtieth birthday. Ya know what that means, right?"
"No. What?"
"You're middle-aged!" She started laughing and hopped onto the bed next to him.
"An' you're a fuckin' pest, but I don't go 'round an' declare that to the whole fuckin' world!"
"I know I'm a pest, but you love me, right?"
"Though I 'ate t' admit it, yes."
"Then you'll do what I say."
"If I live past my fourthieth, I'll murder ya."
"You wouldn't dare."
"I would, an' I might." He put on his signature smirk, but Adria glared him right back down to earth.
"I don't think you will."
"God," he groaned, "you're a bitch."
Well, that did it! Growling and bearing her slightly sharpened canine teeth, she slapped Murdoc across the face. Murdoc hissed in air through his own fangs and lightly placed his hand on his sore cheek, which, within a few minutes, would have a red hand mark printed on it.
"It's settled; I'm an idiot," he said.
"Yeah, you are. Now, do me a favor and hand me my Hello Kitty pajamas."
"But I don' wanna." Murdoc was whining like a child.
"Do it, or I'll slap you again."
"No wonder they say to love ya enemies."
June 6th, 2006, 9:21 AM...
"We there yet?"
"No."
" 'Ow 'bout now?"
"No."
"...'Ow 'bout now?"
"Damnit, Murdoc, shut your fucking mouth!"
"But, Adria, I've been in this damn limo for more than two damn 'ours! Any more time goes by, an' the 'Bore Patrol' is gonna be wheelin' me out on a stretcher."
"Shut up, Murdoc-san," Noodle repeated for Adria while flipping through a copy of Beckett Anime Collector. "None of us want to be on this limousine, but it is only for a day. Get over it."
"Whoa, man." That came from Russel, and he was in complete shock. "Muds, did Noodle just tell you off?" He started laughing.
2D started laughing, too. "That's a first. Nicely done, Noodle-love."
"Ah, shut ya face, face-ache. God, right now, I need a knife, a bottle of vodka, an' a Playboy."
"Why a knife?" the other four asked in unison, not surprised that they all were thinking about that.
"T' stab myself in the 'eart."
Adria scoffed. "You don't have a heart."
"Oh, really?" He cocked an eyebrow."Well, if I didn't 'ave one, then 'ow are ya my girlfriend right 'bout now?" He smirked and knew that he was one-hundred-percent right.
" 'E's got ya there, darlin'," 2D pointed out.
"Stay outta this; ya don't even understand what we're talkin' 'bout!"
"...Wait; what are we talkin' 'bout?"
Total silence...for about thirty seconds. Then everyone (except 2D, of course!) started laughing their asses off without any control. And, as usual, 2D was offended, but still didn't understand why.
Then the limo came to a complete hault.
"I guess we're here," said Adria excitedly.
"Fascinatin'." She could tell Murdoc was being sarcastic. "By the way, jus' who is this person we're celebratin' the remainder of my birthday wit'?"
"I told you on the plane."
"Remind me; I forgot."
"Her name's Karina. She was one of my orphanage buddies for about four years before I was put in a foster home."
"Christ, ya know people all ova' the place."
"How old is Karina-san?" Noodle finally finished her magazine, rolled it up, and stuck it in her bright-blue messenger bag.
"She's nineteen."
"Is she like Cora?" 2D and Russel both asked.
"Not at all; she's the bipolar-ish kinda type."
"What do you mean?" asked Noodle.
"One minute she's happy, the next she wants to die."
"Ouch. That's a bit 'arsh," said a sympathetic 2D.
"Yeah, she didn't really have an enjoyable childhood, and she'sa bit emotionally disturbed,but she's really cool once you get to know her. Plus, Murdoc and 2D, she likes you both."
"Both of us!" Yet again,more that one personwas speaking at the same time.
"Actually, she's in love with both of you, but she, like, idolizes Murdoc. She even cosplayed as you to a party."
"Well, well, well," Murdoc seemed a bit happier now, "who doesn't?"
"Don't get cocky, Muds. Well, let's go."
All five then exited the car onto a large front lawn...of a really large house! Not as big as Adria's, but still quite big nonetheless. It was a dark tan Victorian-style house with black shudders and a porch that stretched around it entirely. In the driveway, there was a black and purple 2007 Mercedes-Benz with chrome rims that looked so sharp, that just touching them would probably make your fingers bleed. Still, all four band members just stared at the house.
"Garrison, did ya lend this chick any money?" Murdoc asked without removing his eyes from their target view.
"No; her parents owned a car dealership, they passed away, she took over, and now she's fancy-living!"
"Whoa, la-dee-da." Murdoc couldn't stop being sarcastic.
Suddenly, the front door to the house opened, and a young girl stepped down the porch steps. She stood about five-and-a-half feet tall, with pale blonde hair, sky blue eyes, tan skin, and an hourglass-shaped body. She was dressed in all black, except for the purple satin ribbons that held her hair back.
"Adria, that you?" the girl called.
Adria screamed the minute she turned around and saw her friend. "KARINA!" She ran over to her and hugged her, both of them laughing happily.
"Adri! Oh my god, I can't believe you made it!" The two kept on hugging.
"Yeah, and guess who else is here?" She let go of the hug and pointed behind her. Karina looked over her shoulder, and let out a scream. She then ran towards 2D.
"Aw, crap! Not again!" 2D whined before trying to start running. The reason why I put "trying to start running" was because just as he was about to take off, Karina grabbed him and hugged him tightly.
"He's here!" Karina cried. "He's here, he's here, he's here!"
"Nice t' meet ya, too," the singer struggled to say. "But, guess 'o else is 'ere?"
"Who!"
"Let go of me an' turn to ya right."
Karina did as she was told, freeing 2D and turning to the right. She freaked out twice as much as when she saw 2D, ran towards Murdoc, and tackle-hugged him.
"Oh my god, you're ten times more gorgeous in real life!" she shrieked. Now, there wasn't any way humanely possible that she'd let this one go.
"Garrison, ya mind gettin' 'er offa me?" Murdoc growled, glaring Adria's way.
"Hmmm...you're on your own, buddy," she replied as she went to go over and stand next to the others. "Be nice to her, though."
"Damn ya. Um, Karina?"
Karina instantly looked into Murdoc's mismatched eyes with her own sapphire ones. "Yes?"
"I kinda can't breathe. Can you lemme go, please?"
"Oops! Sorry, Muds." She let him go and stood up. She then put out her hand for him to take. "Need a hand?"
"Yeah, I guess." He took her hand and she pulled him back to his feet. He then dusted some dirt off of his "BASSISTS GO DEEPER" black-and-red, skull-printedT-shirt. It was the only shirt he had with something written on the front besides his "EXORCIST" movie print one; he really didn't care for stupid T-shirts that said things like "TOUGH GUYS WEAR PINK" or "SELLING MY SISTER TO SAVE UP FOR SOME VIDEO GAMES". They just didn't fancy him at all.
"Y'know, you are awfully hot." The girl looked as if she was going to start drooling.
"Yeah, I get that alot."
"Nice to meet you, and sorry for the tackle-hug."
"Eh, I get that alot, too."
Karina then smiled and walked over to Noodle and Russel for a friendlier and less crazier greeting. Both were planning on running the minute she turned back around and proceeded towards them, but when they saw her walk over to them, tehy weren't so scared anymore.
"So, you guys ready to come in?" she asked.
All of them either nodded or said "yes", and they all walked toward the front door.
"Hey, Murdoc," Karina whispered to him, walking right by his side.
"What?" he whispered back just to humor her.
"I'm Satanic, too." And with that, she reached into the front of her blouse and pulled out a silver upside-down cross. It was about the same size as Murdoc's, but it had her name carved into it.
"Nice necklace," he commented as she opened the door and they all stepped in.
Yet again, all four band members were mesmerized by the house, this time the interior of it. But now, the only difference was that Adria seemed pretty surprised, too. The house interior seemed like a spooky-but-elegant haunted house, excluding spiderwebs and broken windows. The sun shone through the windows, but the house still remained eerily dark.
"Damn," all five gasped.
Karina only laughed. "Guys, it's no big deal. C'mon, anyone wanna play some video games?"
"Did you get your new game room set up?" Adria asked her.
"Yup! Let's go; I'll show you guys where it is." She started going up the stairs, and the five others followed her. They all continued down the wide hallway until they reached a door with a silver plague on it that read "GAME ROOM". Karina then opened the door turned on the light.
The room looked like a gigantic arcade, with every video game you could imagine: Mortal Combat, Tekken, DanceDance Revolution Extreme, PacMan, Frogger, and many others. Then, in a large corner of the room, there was a widescreen television set, with a PS2, Nintendo GameCube, XBox, and VHS player all set up near it, controllers and remote controls neatly placed on top of each one. The whole room was loud with the sounds of the games and from the widescreen blasting the referee's voice for a Yankees game.
"This...is better than Christmas," Noodle said. She then ran over to a video game machine marked AREA 51, but then hesitated. She then looked at the others, especially Karina.
"Karina-san, do I need to put a quarter in?" she asked.
"Nope. I had them designed so they would need payment," she replied. "Just go ahead and play."
Smiling widely, Noodle did exactly as she was told.
Karina smiled back, then looked around at the other five. "Well, don't just stand there like braindead zombies," she said. "Go ahead and play."
Shrugging, they all ran to a different game, Murdoc to Mortal Combat, 2D to Tekken, Russel to Street Hoops, and Adria to the widescreen to play Kingdom Hearts. Karina joined Adria near the TV, and the fun began to begin
Three hours later...
"C'mon, Karina!"
"You go, girl!"
"Keep drinking, Karina-san!"
"Go, Murdoc!"
"ADRIA, SHUT UP!"
After a lot of video games, a lot of arguing, and a WHOLE HELL OF A LOT of double-decker dark chocolate birthday cake, Karina had gotten into a hyper fit and challenged Murdoc to something he just couldn't turn down. The first one to complete drinking a six-pack of Budweiser would win. If Karina won, she was guaranteed a free make-out session with Murdoc, which Adria was completely cool with since her boyfriend was somewhat of a man-whore anyway.
If Murdoc won, however, the stakes were much higher. If he won, Karina would have to be his personal slave for the rest of his birthday and the other two days that they were staying.
So far, Murdoc was winning, but Karina was catching up fast. The Satanist had just finished his fourth can, and Karina was halfway through hers.
"Who do you guys think is gonna win?" Adria asked the other three spectators, after they all yelled at her.
"I 'fink Karina's gonna win," 2D replied.
"You're just saying that 'cuz you've been cheering for her for the past five minutes, and because she downed her first two beers quicker than Muds did."
"...So?"
"Truthfully, I think Murdoc's gonna win," said Russel. "He's had tons of years of experience, and it takes more than a six-pack to stop him." The drummer then looked at Noodle, who was watching the battle with anxious eyes. "Who do you think is gonna win, Noodle-girl?"
"I am hoping Karina-san will win, but then again, Murdoc is pretty talented at drinking alcohol."
Finally, the two were down to their last can of beer. But, just before starting to drink, they started glaring at each other and smirking.
"Ready t' lose, love?" Murdoc sneered.
"After you lose, I'll be sure to give you credit for your hard work, Niccals." Karina smirked evilly.
"Right." Murdoc picked up his last can, Karina picked up her own, they clacked them together, quickly said "cheers" to each other, and started to drink, desperately trying to ignore their sick stomachs as the chocolate cake and alcohol converged in their systems.
Suddenly, the winner smashed their can onto the table and let out a large sigh.
Murdoc had won, and Karina wasn't so fond of losing.
"Good game, love," the Satanist said as he wiped some drops of beer off his face with the back of his hand.
"You gotta be kidding me!" Karina complained as she panted heavily from not being able to breathe for a good minute and a half. "How could I have lost?"
"Experience, darlin'. Nothin' but experience, which ya really don't 'ave."
"Y'know, you may be hot, but you really are an asshole sometimes."
"And you can be an insensitive bitch, jus' like Adria."
"Cool it, Muds!" Russel warned.
"Shut up, lards."
"Russ, don' lose control like ya did last time," said 2D, putting his hand on the drummer's tense shoulder.
"I won't; don't worry, man."
"Murdoc, I'll murder you." Now, Adria seemed rather pissed. He had killed two birds with one stone making fun of both her friend and her.
"Do it later, Garrison."
"What did you just call me?" Karina crossed her arms.
"Uh, a bitch? Why, do ya want me t' spell it for ya?"
"No, I'm perfectly smart, unlike some. Maybe you should go ahead and do what all those other goths do and try to kill yourself; I don't see anyone who actually cares about you; maybe the world will be a more peaceful place without you on it!"
"Karina, you really need to stop." Adria knew that there actually was no way to stop Karina's ranting.
Now, Murdoc was really aggravated, and the next thing he said would shock everyone.
"Why doncha jus' go back to the mental institute ya came from an' stay there where ya most wanted?"
The other three band members gasped. Adria hit herself in the head with her palm, totally blown away. Karina looked both furious and like she was about to cry. She then stood up from the couch and looked right into Murdoc's eyes.
"Y'know what?" she said, her voice beginning to break up, "no wonder you guys say to 'reject false icons'; these three," she pointed at 2D, Noodle, and Russel, "have all had experience with one!" She then stomped away, out the door, and broke into a run down the hallway towards the stairs, her eyes just gushing out tears.
Meanwhile, back in the game room...
WHACK!
"Oi, Adria! what was that for!" Murdoc yelled, rubbing his cheek.
"For making fun of one of my best friends when I specifically told you that she had emotional problems!" Adria yelled back. "You've got a lot of nerve doing that to her!"
"Well, she pissed me off!"
"I don't care if she shot you in the fuckin' leg; I suggest you go and try to apologize to her, if you even know how to say that you're sorry, which I highly doubtyou do!"
"Well, in the next lifetime, for future ref'rence, when I say that I don' wnat t' do anythin' for my birthday, I suggest ya listen t' me."
"Guys, calm down," 2D sheepishly said.
"STAY OUTTA THIS, STUPOT!" both yelled at him.
"Got it..."
"2D-san is right, you two. You need to calm down and shut up; I am serious!"
The two looked a Noodle. They had never heard or seen her so angry before. A small vein even seemed to be bulging out of her neck.
Adria sighed. "Sorry, Noods." She then looked at Murdoc. "So are you gonna apologize to her or not?"
"Oh, so ya givin' me a choice?"
"Muds, I swear to-"
Noodle cleared her throat and crossed her arms.
"Sorry. Just apologize to her. For me. Please?"
Murdoc paused, then heavily exhaled. "Alright, I will." He stood up from the couch. "Where's 'er room?"
"Back down the hall and down the stairs. Turn right, and head down the first hallway you see. Her room is the third door on the left."
"Thanks." He walked toward the Game Room door and exited, leaving the other four behind.
"You think he'll do it?" Russel asked.
"Only one way to find out," Adria replied, standing up. "C'mon; let's find him."
Back in Karina's room, Karina was too busy crying her eyes out into her pillow, her purple eye makeup smudging all over her face. She sniffled and wiped the tears away, only resulting in more of them tumbling down her face.
"I thought only to the media he was mean," she whimpered, "but I guess it's to his friends and fans, too. I have no clue what I ever saw in him."
Suddenly, there was a knock on her bedroom door, and she instantly picked her head up and stared at it. "Adria? That you?"
"Not exactly," the voice said as the door opened, revealing a guilty-looking Murdoc.
Karina snarled at him. "What the fuck do you want, Niccals? I've heard enough out of you."
Murdoc approached the bed and sat down on the edge. "I'm sure ya 'ave, but I need t' tell ya summink?"
"Like what? The mental hospital called; they want their psycho back!"
"Will ya jus' calm down? I jus' wanted t' tell ya that I'm sorry!"
Karina was about to say something, but when she heard the word "sorry", she sighed and forgot about it. "If you're so sorry, why did you make me feel that bad back there?"
"I get pissed quite easily. Ya my fan; I thought ya knew that already."
"Yeah, I knew that. But I only thought it was toward 2D and the others, not toward your fans."
"Well, maybe some of my fans, only the ones that piss me off."
"I guess I'm categorized under that label, right?"
"Naw, ya okay." He inched a little bit closer to Karina. "An' truthfully, ya don' look too bad for a fangirl."
Karina instantly looked at Murdoc and blushed. "What are you trying to say, Muds."
"Maybe I can give ya some credit for drinkin' those first two beers quicker than me; ya do deserve a reward for it, if you'll lemme give it t'ya. Actually, I don' care." He pulled her to him in a fiery kiss, and she immediately stopped being tense. Now, all she cared about was making out with her idol.
Little did they know, the door to Karina's room wasn't completely shut, and four people were watching them.
"I knew she could never stop being his fan," Adria said smirking.
"Personally, don' ya fink this is a bit wrong t' be watchin' them kiss an' everythin'?" 2D asked.
"Nah!"
"Are ya four watchin' us!" Murdoc yelled from inside the room.
The four spectators only laughed.
Well, I'm SO glad I finally got this story done. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MURDOC! Another year older, but another year hotter! Keep at it, man; you're doing great! WE LOVE YOU!