Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow
(And Other Shakespearean Lies)
By Misty
February 14, 2000 - 5:45 p.m.
Seventeen-year old Trixie Belden looked out her window with dread as she saw the shiny silver Camaro pull into the driveway. She thought this date with Christian would be a good distraction for her. Sure he was a pompous, arrogant ass, but what guy wasn't? They were all full of themselves. Some just hid it better than others, that's all. With Christian, she knew where she stood and she could keep her guard up around him. But now, she was having second thoughts about spending the most romantic day of the year with a guy she couldn't stand.
A knock on her door brought her out of her reverie. "Trixie, honey. Christian is here."
She walked over and opened the door for he mother. "Ok, Moms. I'm ready." She gave her mother a reassuring smile, and walked past her towards the stairs. Helen Belden looked at her daughter as she walked by, and knew Trixie was hurting. Her stubborn pride wouldn't allow anyone to know exactly how much pain she was in, but Helen knew it was tremendous. Unfortunately, there wasn't anything anyone could do to help. She knew Trixie just wanted life to get back to normal, whatever that may be. It was the first time Helen had ever wished for a mystery to pop up. She knew a good mystery would distract Trixie from her broken heart.
She followed Trixie down the stairs where her husband was talking to Christian. When Christian saw Trixie, wearing a blue silk blouse with a simple black skirt, he walked over and handed her a small box of chocolates and a bouquet of wild flowers. Trixie took the gifts unenthusiastically. "Wow. Flowers and a box of chocolates. How original." She muttered under her breath.
Hearing her mother clear her throat, she stood a little straighter. "I mean, thank you very much. It was very thoughtful of you."
The front door opened suddenly, and Brian walked into the living room. "Hey everyone." He walked over and kissed his mom on the cheek before walking over to Trixie.
Trixie's eyes lit up at the sight of her oldest brother. He had helped her so much during the last month, and she was eternally grateful for his non-condescending attitude during the whole ordeal. He may have been a little overprotective a few times, but that was what big brothers did, she reasoned. He eyed Christian warily. Walking over and pulling Trixie into a big bear hug, his eyes never left Christian's. He looked at the young man taking his sister out, and eyed him critically. He didn't want to believe what Jim had told him about this guy, but where his sister was concerned, he couldn't just ignore the warning, either.
Deciding he looked harmless enough, he released Trixie from his grasp. "You guys have fun tonight."
The words were barely out of his mouth when a loud crash came from upstairs. Trixie and her mother looked at each other before hurrying up the stairs. When they reached the top of the stairs, they saw Bobby standing outside Trixie's room adjusting his halo, with his best angel expression on his face. Trixie walked into her room and saw the glass figurine Jim had given her for Christmas laying on the floor in pieces.
Helen gave her son a stern look. "Bobby, how many times do I have to tell you to stay out of your sister's room?"
His face fell, and the devil in him was back. "I was just trying to see what kind of car he drove." He mumbled.
Trixie looked at her mother, pleadingly.
"You go ahead. Bobby will clean this mess up." She looked at her youngest son sternly and pointed to the door as a sign he should get started.
Trixie smiled at her mother gratefully. "Thanks, Moms. I had been meaning to pack that away with the rest of the stuff for a while now anyway. I guess throwing it away will be just as good."
Kissing her mother on the cheek, she ran past her and down the stairs where Christian was waiting for her.
Her father handed her coat to her as they walked to the door. He didn't know what had happened between Trixie and Jim, and he had a feeling he didn't want to know. Nothing that happened to Trixie was ever simple, and he was pretty sure that matters of the heart would not be an exception. He was grateful no one would tell him. Normally, he was an easygoing, laid back kind of guy, but where his only daughter was concerned, he could not forgive nor forget any pain or heartache imposed on her. He was happy when Trixie made it back to school after her short absence and he was relieved to see her finally getting out of the house, even if it was a school night. What he was most grateful for though, was that the nightmares had finally completely stopped about a week ago. He kissed his daughter on the cheek and waved goodbye as the two left, reminding her to be home by midnight.
Trixie and Christian sat in silence as he pulled out of the driveway and headed down Glen Road. "I thought we could have an early dinner and then see a movie. 'Anna and The King' is showing at 7:30. Would that be alright with you?"
Trixie smiled. She had wanted to see Anna and The King for quite a while now. She had used that movie as a cover on one of her and Jim's last dates. Her smile faded as she remembered that night.
She felt Christian looking at her inquisitively. "That sounds great. I haven't seen that movie yet." She settled back in her seat and braced herself for an evening of mediocre company and painful memories.
*&MU&*
Jim Frayne walked down the steep driveway of the Manor House and looked at his watch. 11 p.m. He didn't know if Trixie would talk to him. He had screwed things up really bad with her, and he didn't blame her if she never talked to him again. He had to try, though.
A love struck Romeo
Sings the streets a serenade
Laying everybody low
With a love song that he made.
Finds a streetlight,
Steps out of the shade,
Says something like,
"You and me babe, how about it?"
Jim walked up the driveway of Crabapple Farm, towards Trixie's window. He knew she had gone on a date with that snake Christian, but he was hoping she would be home by now. He held one hand behind his back and picked up a few small pebbles off the driveway with his other hand. He threw the first one, and it made a gentle clinking noise against her window. He waited to see if she would appear. When she didn't come to the window, he threw the second one, and again waited. He didn't want to go to the door and wake her entire family, but he really needed to talk to her. Besides, he got the feeling he wasn't very welcome in the Belden home at the moment. He threw the last pebble, and was elated when he saw her lamp click on and a soft glow coming from the window. A moment later, a head of tangled curls opened the window and peaked out at him.
Juliet says, "Hey, it's Romeo,
You nearly gave me a heart attack"
He's underneath the window,
She's singing, "Hey la, my boyfriend's back.
You shouldn't come around here
Singing up at people like that"
Anyway, what you going to do about it?
"What the hell are you doing here, Jim? Do you know what time it is? I almost called Molison to come and arrest you." The words came out in rushed anger.
"You, call Molison before you check out something mysterious? That'll be the day," he retorted.
She spoke quietly, trying to control her rage. "Why are you here, Jim? Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Trixie, I needed to talk to you," he pleaded. "I've been thinking about you a lot in the last month."
"What if I don't want to talk to you?" she shot back.
"Please Trixie, don't be like that. Just hear me out." He looked up at her hopefully. "Can I come in? It's getting cold standing out here."
She looked down at him. His nose was red, and his lips were chapped. "No, I don't think so. I think you need to suffer a little bit. If you have something to say to me, you can say it from down there."
Getting aggravated at her stubbornness, Jim shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "Fine, suit yourself."
Juliet, the dice was loaded from the start,
And I bet, and you exploded in my heart,
And I forget the movie song.
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong?
... Juliet...
He opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it. He hesitated and opened his mouth again, but closed it just as quickly.
Looking at him with amusement, she was surprised to realize she was enjoying watching him squirm. "So far, I'm not impressed, Jim," she said dryly.
He glared up at her. She wasn't pulling any punches, and she was enjoying this scenario too much. He knew, though, that if he wanted to talk to her, he would have to do it on her terms. This was the only way. Defeated, he ran his hand through his thick red hair and let his arm drop to his side before shrugging his shoulders helplessly. "I don't know where to start."
She looked at him sympathetically. "What were you thinking about?" she asked quietly. She hated seeing him struggle with his emotions this way.
Taken aback by the gentleness in her voice, he looked up at her in confusion. "When?"
She let out a little sigh before reminding him of his earlier statement. "You said you had been thinking about me this last month. What were you thinking about?"
He gave a sheepish grin. "Oh yeah. Just everything, really. When we first met. How you literally stumbled into my life. Our first dance, our first official date alone." He paused before he continued quietly. "The first time we made love. Do you remember those song lyrics? Just Breathe."
Trixie's eyes glazed over for a moment as she was transported back to that January evening. The painful memories that followed immediately put her back on the defensive. "You mean the beginning of the end?" she asked dryly.
"I don't know if I would call it that. . ." his voice trailed off reluctantly. He knew she was right.
She shrugged her shoulders with indifference. "You can call it whatever you want to."
"Sometimes I think we were just destined to fail. We are such different people, Trixie. We have different goals in life, and I don't want either of us to have to compromise those."
Come up on different streets. They both were streets of shame.
Both dirty, both mean, yes, and the dream was just the same.
And I dreamed your dream for you, and now your dream is real,
How can you look at me as if I was just another one of your deals?
"I'm sorry you didn't have faith in us, Jim." she replied. Thoughtfully, she continued. "You're right, though. We are very different people. You want to know what the biggest difference is? I had faith that no matter what happened, we could always work through it if we worked together. You decided for both of us that we weren't ready for this relationship." She looked down at him sorrowfully. "THAT is the big difference between us."
He words stung him to the depths of his soul. If she had said them in anger or rage, he could have written it off as an emotional outburst, but the way she spoke so calmly, he knew she meant every word. "Trixie, there is more to it than that. I'm talking about being sure of your feelings, and experiencing all that life has to offer."
She was tiring of this conversation. It was draining her emotionally, and she wanted it over quickly. "Well, you certainly gave me the opportunity to experience heartache, didn't you? I think I have had enough of that to last a lifetime."
"It was never my intention to hurt you," he stated forcefully.
"You were unsuccessful," she replied shortly.
Growing angry again at her tart remarks, he spoke bluntly. "It looks like you are moving on without any problems."
Not sure of what he was referring to, she eyed him suspiciously. "What is that supposed to mean?" she asked warily.
"I heard you had a date with Christian. From what I hear, every girl in Sleepyside High School is drooling for a chance to go out with him. That must have been rewarding for you." He regretted the words as soon as they escaped his lips.
She looked at him through angry eyes. "Look, Jim, you lost all rights to judge me and my actions when you decided we should stop seeing each other. You have no claim to me, and what I do with my free time is my own business." Growing angrier by the second, she raised her voice and continued. "Who do you think you are? And where do you get off trying to make me feel guilty for moving on with my life. Isn't that what you were just telling me to do?"
When you can fall for chains of silver,
You can fall for chains of gold,
You can fall for pretty strangers
And the promises they hold,
You promised me everything,
You promised me thick and thin.
Now you just say, "Oh, Romeo, yeah, you know,
I used to have a scene with him."
The calm in his voice belied the anger that was boiling within him. "I have the right to worry about you. You are still my friend. I still love you, Trixie."
She looked at the clock on her night table, the jewelry box that sat on her dresser and her collection of Lucy Radcliffe books that sat in her bookcase. She looked everywhere but down at him when she replied. "You'll get over it."
Growing exasperated at her flippant attitude, he practically shouted to get her attention. "You mean you don't hold out hope that someday, in the future, we may be able to work all this out?"
When she looked down at him, he realized why she had been averting her gaze. With tear filled eyes, she spoke harshly. "Right now, I only hold out hope that I will be able to sleep all the way through the night and wake up in the morning without the urge to either cry or throw-up. If I can do that, the day has already been successful."
"Believe it or not, my heart was broken too."
Trixie laughed at the irony of Jim breaking up with her and then lamenting about his broken heart as if she were somehow responsible for it. She shot down to him mockingly, "The worst part of this whole mess was the awful, clichéd advice people kept giving me. So here is my revenge on you." Shifting her position where she sat, she feigned a concerned look and began the now too familiar phrases. "'Time heals all wounds.' 'The heart doesn't break, it bruises.' 'Someday, you will find someone who truly appreciates you.' Ooh and my favorite. 'It isn't worth getting upset over.'"
Juliet, when we made love,
You used to cry.
You said, "I love you like the stars above,
I'll love you till I die."
There's a place for us –
You know the movie song,
When you gonna realize,
It was just that the time was wrong?
...Juliet...
He eyed her giggling hysterically and set his jaw stubbornly. "Well, I am not giving up hope that we can still work this out someday. I miss you, Trix. I never thought I would lose you completely."
She raised her eyebrows in disbelief. "What did you expect to happen when you told me things were moving too fast and that we should see other people? Did that mean YOU could see other people, and that I would stay home waiting for you?"
She was taking everything he was saying out of context, and it was infuriating. He gritted his teeth before he replied. "Of course not. I just wanted you to be sure of your feelings for me."
Covering her heart with her hand, she started down at him from her lofty perch in the window. She spoke softly but forcefully. "I was sure. If there was ever anything in my life I was sure of, it was my feelings for you. I may not be the brightest person in the world, and I may have pulled some crazy stunts in my life, but if nothing else, the things I have done have made me more aware of how short life is and how important my loved ones are to me. You were the most important person to me. I laid everything out on the line for you. I opened my heart to you and trusted that you would take care of it. But instead of taking care of it, you crushed it in some bizarre plan to protect my innocence and naïveté."
I can't do the talk like the talk on the TV,
And I can't do a love song like the way it's meant to be.
I can't do everything, but I'll do anything for you,
I can't do anything except be in love with you.
He grimaced at her brutal honesty. "I know. I wish I could go back to that night in January and talk to you. I wish I could take it all back and fix everything, but I can't. I can't stop loving you, Trix. I will always love you, no matter what."
Her heart melted at his words, but she wouldn't let her guard down. "I love you too, but it isn't enough. I'm not ready to trust you again. I may never be."
His face fell ashen and he looked away. Trixie didn't know whether to interpret his actions as anger or hurt until she saw the tears welling up in his eyes. He looked back up at her. "I wish there was something I could say. I don't have the eloquence of poets or romance writers to say what I feel."
And all I do is miss you, and the way we used to be.
All I do is keep the beat, the band company.
All I do is kiss you, through the bars of a rhyme,
Juliet, I'd do the stars with you anytime.
She rested her arms on the windowsill and laid her head to rest in the crook of her bent arm. She looked at him thoughtfully before responding. "It doesn't take eloquence, just honesty."
He looked at her beseechingly. "And there is no way I can come inside and apologize? My neck is starting to cramp up."
Trixie giggled helplessly. "Oh, Jim. You can't come inside. I'm not here."
He looked up at her suspiciously. "What are you talking about?" Confusion at her statement and her sudden jovial manner filled his handsome features.
"When have I ever been home before midnight? I'm just a figment of your overactive imagination, silly. It's too bad you can't say those things to me when I might actually hear them. I bet I would be swooning. Remember what you told me about people who talk to themselves?" She looked at him with an amused twinkle in her eye. Could it be that even his own mind would play such a horrible trick on him?
Juliet, when we made love, you used to cry.
You said, " I love you like the stars above, I'll love you till I die."
There's a place for us - you know the movie song,
When you gonna realize, it was just that the time was wrong?
...Juliet...
He rubbed his hand over his eyes, and looked back at her window. The blinds were drawn, and the light was off. He opened his right hand in front of him and saw the last pebble lying on his outstretched palm. He had been gripping the rock for so long, a sharp edge had cut into his skin causing it to bleed. He clenched his hand into a fist once more and let it fall to his side. Opening his hand, the pebble fell helplessly to the ground below him.
He walked to the trellis under Trixie's window. Pulling his other arm from behind his back, he put the rose that had been hidden there between his teeth and began to climb, not noticing the pain from the deep gouge in his hand. When he reached her window, he placed the rose on the ledge and began his descent to the ground, jumping the last couple feet. From his old room in the Manor House, he would be able to see Trixie's window down in the hollow. He headed back to the house on the hill to clean his hand and wait.
A love struck Romeo sings the streets a serenade
Laying everybody low with a love song that he made.
Finds a convenient streetlight, steps out of the shade,
Says something like, "You and me babe, how about it?"
*&MU&*
It is always surprising how small a part of life is taken up by meaningful moments. Most often they are over before they start, even though they cast a light on the future, and make the person who originated them unforgettable.
Anna had shined such a light on Siam. And even after I ascended to my father's place upon the throne, I never, ever forgot her.
The movie ended, and Trixie's eyes shone with tears. Maybe seeing such a sappy love story wasn't such a good idea, she thought. At least, I was able to keep from crying. The last thing I want to do is show weakness in front of this prick. The closing credits began to roll, and the music of the love song wafted through the speakers in the theater.
Can Not Touch
Can Not Hold
Can Not Be Together
Can Not Love
Can Not Kiss
Can Not Have Each Other
Must Be Strong
And We Must Let Go
Can Not Say
What Our Hearts Must Know
How Can I Not Love You
What Do I Tell My Heart
When Do I Not Want You
Here In My Arms
Christian looked at her with a bored expression on his face. "Well, that was a chick flick if I ever saw one. Are you ready to go?" he asked restlessly.
She frowned at him for just a moment before turning her attention back to the screen. "Shh. Not yet."
How Does One Waltz Away
From All The Memories
How Do I Not Miss You
When You Are Gone
Can Not Dream
Can Not Share
Sweet And Tender Moments
"We really need to get going, Trixie."
She glared up at him for a moment. What was he in such a hurry for, anyway? "Oh, fine."
She stood up and pulled her jacket on, following him out of the crowded theater. The night air stung Trixie's face, and she pulled her coat tighter around her. She hurried to the passenger side of the car where Christian was holding the door open for her. Once she was settled in, he shut the door after her, and ran around to let himself in on the driver's side.
He got in and started the ignition. "Looks like we still have about an hour before your curfew. Is there anything you want to do?" he asked, hoping she would say no. He had plans for her already.
Trixie sighed. "Not really. If you want to just drive around for a while, I could serve as your tour guide." She knew she was being a bad date, but her heart just wasn't in it. Not only that, but she didn't exactly trust Christian. He was quickly becoming known as a playboy at school, a fact he seemed proud of.
"Sure. Where do we go first?" He knew where he wanted to take her. Every town had a make-out point, even towns as small as this one. Drew had given him detailed information and directions in school the previous week. He knew it probably wouldn't be this date, or even the next one, but he was determined to get Trixie Belden up there.
She thought for a moment before giving him directions. "Um, take a right out of the parking lot and at the light, take a left."
It looks like I am going to have to suffer through a tour of Hicksville. Oh well, whatever gets her to relax around me. "Ok. Where will that take us?"
"By Wimpy's. It is the place where a lot of kids hang out after school and on weekends."
He mustered as much enthusiasm as was possible. "Cool. Do you want to stop?"
Trixie wrinkled her nose in the dark. "No, that's alright. I don't feel like seeing anyone from school tonight. I mean, we just saw them today, and we'll have to see them again tomorrow."
They drove past the popular hang out and saw that it was indeed, packed with students.
"Ok, now where to?"
Trying to keep their tour away from any place that could be remotely romantic, she thought before giving him the next set of directions. "Take another right at the stop sign, and we can drive past town hall and say hi to Hoppy."
"Who is Hoppy?" He looked at her afraid of what her answer will be.
"Hoppy is our weather vane. It is tradition to say hi to him when you pass by," she said matter-of-factly.
"I see," he said simply, knowing it was all he could say without laughing out loud and offending her.
They drove through the town slowly, Trixie pointing out places of interest and answering Christian's questions. She was beginning to feel more at ease, and by the time they finally reached Crabapple farm, forty-five minutes had passed.
"Thanks for dinner and the movie, Christian. I really had a good time tonight." She reached for the door to let herself out. Deciding he should at least make an attempt to gauge her responsiveness, he put his hand on her arm and leaned over towards her.
When she turned to face him, she saw that he had leaned across the seat next to her and their lips were mere inches apart. Before she could react, he leaned forward and pulled her into a deep kiss. She pushed him away with her hands and broke the embrace. "Christian, we had fun tonight. Don't ruin it."
"I'm not ruining it. Just relax and let me handle everything," he cooed. He leaned towards her again and pressed his lips firmly against hers catching her off guard while she fumbled with something in her purse. She found what she was looking for, and pushed him away again.
She pointed the black tube at him and stated matter-of-factly. "You come anywhere near me again, you won't live to tell about it."
He looked at the pepper spray in her hand and backed away, grumbling. "Sheesh. Sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. I thought you were just nervous or something."
"I am not some nit-wit who needs a man to take care of her. I know what I want, and I know what I don't want. I will keep you informed of those facts if I think you need to know them. You will save yourself a lot of trouble if you keep that in mind. Got it?" She told him pointedly.
Not waiting for an answer or leaving any room for argument, she let herself out of the car and closed the door behind her. He opened his own door and called after her. "Trixie!"
She turned to face him. "What?"
"I really am sorry. You aren't going to hold this against me, are you?" he smiled at her brilliantly the smile that no girl or woman had ever before refused.
"Forget about it. I'll only hold it against you if you let it happen again." She smiled back at him and walked into the house.
He got back into his car and breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn't blown things. Oh man, this is going to be tougher than I thought.
Trixie closed the door behind her and hung her coat in the closet, mumbling to herself. "Men. When I wanted one to touch me, I couldn't get him to even look at me. The one I didn't want to touch me couldn't keep his hands off."
Peter Belden heard the front door close and looked at his watch. 12:03. Close enough. Seeing Trixie walking by, muttering to herself, he called out to her. "What are you mumbling about?"
She looked at her father, working in his study and smiled a knowing smile. He didn't normally stay up this late working. Only when she went out. She leaned against the doorway, her arms crossed casually across her chest. "I think I have decided to chuck it all and become a nun." She replied in all seriousness.
He clapped his hands together. "REALLY?" he squeaked in delight.
She glared at him with feigned indignation before laughing. "NO!" She uncrossed her arms and walked to where her father sat. Walking around to the back of his chair, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him on top of his head in goodnight. She straightened herself and walked across the room to the door before pausing. She turned to look at him, a mischievous glimmer in her eye. "Do you really think a convent could keep me out of trouble anyway?" She shook her head in reply to her own question before heading out of the door.
He eyed the back of his daughter's curly head and contemplated what he should say. "Trixie!"
"Yes dad?" she asked easily.
He took off his glasses and set them on his desk. "Jim was here throwing pebbles at your window earlier tonight. I don't know what happened between the two of you, but you are my little girl, and if you need any help with your romantic problems, I have a shotgun and a shovel. I'm sure a hunting accident can be arranged."
Her mother didn't understand the dry, sarcastic humor father and daughter shared, but Trixie knew a comment like that from him meant he was concerned and he really cared. A smile shadowed her lips before she replied. "Thanks dad. I'll keep that in mind."
She walked out of the study and up the stairs to her room. She turned her light on and walked over to her dresser to take out her nightgown, noticing the figurine Bobby had broken earlier in the evening was sitting next to a tube of super glue, haphazardly put back together. She smiled at this thoughtful gesture from her otherwise thoughtless younger brother. She walked to her window to close the blinds, and noticed something sitting just outside the glass. Opening her window, she reached out and grabbed the rose from its resting place on the ledge. She brought it to her nose and sniffed its fragrant scent. Looking up, she caught sight of a blinking in the distance. She recognized the series of dots and dashes to be Morse code and her breath caught in her throat. Grabbing a pencil and paper from her desk, she copied the message so that she could decipher it more easily.
She felt tears stinging her eyes as she read the message to herself. Looking out the window, she saw the message repeating itself. She looked at the flashlight that sat by her nightstand, and looked back to the blinking light at the top of the hill. Walking to her nightstand, she grabbed the flashlight and returned to the window.
*&MU&*
From his place high on top of the hill, Jim could easily see down into the hollow. He thought of all the times he had sat in that very place with the same flashlight, signaling in Morse code to Trixie after they were supposed to be in bed. They talked about everything in those conversations. How bright the moon was on a particular night. How scared he was to disappoint his new adoptive parents those first few months he lived with the Wheelers. Hopes and dreams for the future. The shyness they experienced in those first few months of their friendship would disappear in those late night talks. The shyness they both felt after their first kiss was easily overcome on a dark night with two flashlights. They would laugh at the way they got around their parents "No Phone Calls after 9 p.m." rule. When he had moved out of his parent's house, he had been ecstatic to finally be on his own, but that first night in his apartment had been lonely without his friend to talk to.
Jim could see her shadow where she stood in front of the window. He signaled the same two words to her over and over again in the hope that she would relent and signal back to him. His heart dropped when he saw her leave the window and soared when he saw her return. He continued signaling, waiting, hoping for a message from her.
*&MU&*
She stood with the flashlight in her hand, her finger resting on the switch. What am I supposed to tell you, Jim? I'm not ready to trust you again yet? She put the flashlight down in resignation. Reaching up, she turned the rod on the blinds until they closed.
*&MU&*
He was in the middle of the second word when she closed the blinds, shutting him out completely. He sat by the window, staring at the little farmhouse, tears forming in his eyes. Brushing them from his eyes quickly, he stood up resolutely. "Well, I guess that's that." He grabbed his jacket and took one last hopeful glance at her window. Nothing. He turned and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.
*&MU&*
Trixie looked at the paper where she had scribbled his brief message. She took the paper and wadded it into a tight ball, trying to get its emotionally poisonous statement out of her mind. Feeling the tears welling up in her eyes, she slowly began straightening out the page. She looked at the two words and couldn't hold it in any longer. The sheet of paper slipped from her fingers as she grabbed her stomach and let out a gut-wrenching sob. She curled up on the bed and cried herself to sleep, mindless of the paper that lay on the floor with two simple words printed on it. Just Breathe.