I'd like to think I've lived my life as a decent human being, or as decent as I could be in this dumb town. That's why I didn't understand how things had ended up the way they did for me. If we got what we deserved, then why was I here?

It was the weirdest things that reminded me of you, like the sold signs outside of a recently bought house or people talking about swimming. Of course, to me it was rational to get sad over these things because they reminded me of memories I had once been fond of. To everyone else, I was some freak who'd cry over anything.

To avoid these spells of depression, I found myself delving into things I'd previously swore I wouldn't, most prominently alcohol. Liquor either made me forget temporarily or amplified my sorrow. It was a gamble I was willing to take on my worst nights.

That night, it turned out to be the latter of the two. I'd begun my night at home, sitting in my room with a pack of beer that I'd gotten on the way home from work. Sitting alone only made my sadness worse though, so I soon ended up at Skeeters to avoid becoming meloncholy. The atmosphere only continued the downwards spiral though, for when I arrived, the only young people inside were Tammy and Kenny who were too involved in each other to see me.

Surrounded by old people who either soured my mood because they were with someone, weren't, or were eyeing me, I drank a couple hard drinks and stumbled my way into the streets.

Bits of my memory still illude me after that. I can vaguely remember banging on Cartman's door, to which he ignored me. I drunkenly tried to hit his window with rocks and instead found out I'd been hitting Ms.Cartman's window all along and bailed.

More lost time and the next memory that fades in is me getting food from City Wok, but I only ate a bit before feeling like I was going to vomit, forcing me to wander from there as well.

Walking around town for what felt like an eternity, I collapsed from a mixture of dizziness, nausea and exhaustion, falling into the grass in front of the now closed school.

It was dark, and right then, I wanted to die in that moment. As I looked up at the sky, I prayed for some sort of painless end to my pathetic life. Instead, what I got was Craig Tucker.

When he first leaned over me, I thought I'd finally come face to face with what I'd just longed for. In a sick way, I was scared, I didn't actually want to cease existing. After a couple quick blinks though, his face filled my fuzzy vision and it clicked in my brain just who he was.

"Are you alive or what?" He asks, voice as cold as ever as his foot nudges into my side.

"Do I look dead to you?" I fire back with more venom than intended.

He pauses a moment. "Yeah, you do."

I let out a heavy sigh, covering my eyes with my forearm. "I wish I was." I admit, laying there with my thoughts as the world around us goes silent again.

He lets out a sigh of his own and I hear rustling beside me. When he speaks again, it's louder than before, closer. "What happened?"

I move my arm just enough to peek over at him, seeing that he was now seated beside me, legs crossed. "Why should I tell you?"

"Kyle, I've spent my whole life on the side lines, doing nothing but watching everyone else live their lives. If there's something I'm actually good at, it's observing people." He pulls out a cigarette, that much I can see as my eyes adjust to the darkness. The end glows red as he lights it, taking an immediate drag. "I know that right now, you're alone. It's clear you don't have anyone, so just for tonight I'll be that shoulder you need. I don't have anything else to do anyway."

I think for a long moment, fearing that he might tell his friends about what I tell him or that he'd make fun of me. The more I thought about it though, the less he seemed like the kind of person who would do those things.

"It's Stan. I'm in love with him." I start, unsure of my wording.

"Okay, now tell me something I haven't already figured out." He mutters with a hint of annoyance in his voice.

I feel minorly offended before remembering that's just the way he is. "All these years, he's dragged me along on a leash of lies. He's told me how much more he loves me than Wendy, how we'd get a house together one day, sweet things that made me honestly believe that he would leave her behind for me and finally tell his parents he was gay. I've repeatedly had my heart broken by him though, cried so many times, but he somehow knew how to play me so I'd fall for it all over again everytime I told him I was done."

Craig seems to be in thought as he repeatedly flicks the ashes of his cigarette into the cold grass. "What a douche..." He mutters.

"The only reason I've given up now is because he asked Wendy to marry him. All those dreams that were ours were ripped away for me in favor of her. In the end, I'll always be his second choice."

I begin to laugh and I don't really know why, maybe it's my body rejecting the overwhelming sadness but I've begun to crack up, the laughter only dying down as I speak again. "He took my virginity. He kept me from finding anyone else my whole life, Craig. I loved him with my whole heart, never even looked at anyone else, and he couldn't repay me with even a little respect. I'm twenty-two, it's been over ten years he's been playing this game. Why couldn't he just tell me when we were younger that he would never want to end up with me? Why did he ruin my life up until now?"

For the first time in the week after I'd heard the news, I was able to vent to someone. That laughter turned into loud, ugly sobbing as I began to wipe my eyes with balled up fists.

Unexpectedly, Craig moved in closer so our legs were touching, his hand grabbing one of mine. When I looked up, he stayed blank faced, staring ahead at the shrouded building. He stroked the back of my hand with his thumb as I cried until I couldn't anymore. I swore I even heard a couple sniffles from him as well.

"I know how that is. Trust me." He finally reassures.

"H-how?" My voice is weak, my mind more sobered.

"Kenny fucking McCormmick is how." he mumbles. "That's why I'm out here too, if I'm being honest. Blowing off steam."

I was a bit surprised to hear my only friend's name from Craig's lips. "Kenny..? Is he the same?"

"He is. He actually dated me off and on though, acted like he was the only person who would ever understand me and then disappeared from my life at random for months, and sometimes years. He always comes back though and reminds me that he'll never truly reciprocate the feelings I've given him."

I nod, staring at the sky above for a moment as I realized that I wasn't alone. I continue to sniffle disgustingly, eyes finally dry enough to stop overflowing. That was enough to calm my emotions. "Thank you." I mumbled, now more tired than anything.

"It's not like you'll remember this in the morning. Or at least I hope you won't."

I would though.

He releases my hand, rising to his feet. "Let me take you home before you fall asleep. I don't feel like sitting out here anymore anyway." He offers a hand, assisting me in standing.

After that, he brings me back to my house in silence, making sure I get inside before vanishing into the darkness he'd appeared from earlier.

As I laid in bed and began to drift off, I couldn't help but realize that this was the first night I felt at ease.

I knew I'd remember this moment for the rest of my life.

[Thank you for reading this hot mess. I can't decide if this should be a one-shot or the beginning of an unconventional romance. Please let me know which you think.

Also, this actually happened to me. I survived crossing a high way and laid in the grass outside of a Dunkin Donuts and someone I knew in high school worked at that location. I thought it was surreal enough to make an interesting piece.

That's all for now. Please review with an opinion!]