Disclaimer: All belongs to the BBC and Kudos, not i! sniffs

Just a little one shot that's been milling around in my head for a while, wrote to amuse myself, but of course, all reviews are welcome! Thanks go to Emzi.x

My friends say I'm weird. They say it would be much more exciting if I got myself promoted. I'm more than capable of promotion, I just don't want it. I mean for god's sake, if Chris Skelton can make it to C.I.D, there's hope for us all isn't there? My younger brother always says that it would be much more fun to be out there, screeching around corners in an expensive car, facing down armed bank raiders, saving lives.

Nah, it's just not for me. I think my life is much more interesting, they may not see it, but that's because I can't tell them. Some of the things I could tell them, ha, well it would make their hair curl. But discretion is part of my job, if I gossiped that would be that; I'd be joining the army of thousands, the dreaded unemployed.

But it's okay to relieve it all in my head; it's even okay to smirk a little at those few who knew they'd been caught out. Nah, I'm sure life at the desk suits me just fine. And I'm well liked; even a few of the C.I.D lads show me a bit of respect. I suppose they know that if I wanted it hard enough, I could have anyone of their jobs. Well apart from D.I Drake, now she's one tough bird. She seems to like me though, and as for the Guv, well… even he calls me Skip.

Talking of the Guv, I've got a few things on him; I suppose he likes the fact that I keep my mouth shut. I know if he thought I'd said anything to anyone, I'd be nursing a broken arm and a lot else besides.

"Viv?"

I shake my head, coming back to earth. Ray wanders over.

"What?"

"Have you seen Chris? I can't find the stupid twonk anywhere."

I pull a face and shrug.

"Haven't seen him come by mate."

I watch Ray wander off, muttering under his breath something about 'that bloody poof'. I smile at his retreating back and turn the page of my paper. It's been a slow day, and I enjoy just watching the world go by sometimes. I hear the interview room door creak open, I smile and keep my head down as Chris pokes his head out: checking the coast is clear. I pretend to read the paper and hope that no one wants to know what it is I'm reading. I've a sneaking suspicion no one would believe me if I told them I'd been intently studying an article on how knitting was therapeutic. Chris wanders past me with a nervous smile.

"Alright Skip?"

I nod and try to keep the smile from my face, I don't have to try too hard, Chris would have missed it if I'd given him a full on grin. I hear the Guv shouting from C.I.D, and then Ray shouting at Chris as he arrives there. I remember what it was like before the lion upstairs arrived. Quiet as death, and about as interesting. With Hunt had come a new way of policing and although a lot don't agree with some of his methods, it certainly seems to get results. Later, I'd found an ally in D.I Drake, she had since stamped out most of the methods I don't agree with, which stops me worrying about them. I hear the interview door creak open again, and bend behind the desk, keeping my face from view. I hear the footsteps scuttle by and straighten up smiling at Shaz's retreating form. Maybe Chris had got lucky this time? I know D.I Drake had walked in on them last time and spoiled the moment. Said D.I walks in and I smile.

"Morning Ma'am."

"Hiya Viv."

I suppress a smile at the telltale sunglasses, she must have had a good night last night then. I watch her face crack into a smile and feel a little bad. She's far smarter than the rest of them.

"Yes Viv, I did drink an elephant's weight in alcohol last night, and yes I do feel a little rough."

I bite my lip and nod, keeping my face normal. A loud crash of doors on my right alerts me of the Guv's presence.

"Where the bloody 'ell 'ave you been? If yer can't 'andle yer drink Boll's-"

"I'm fine, how's the case come along."

I move away from the desk, I know that look that Gene is wearing well. He'd been fancying a row, and she'd cut him off in order to stop one. She was going to make it worse surely? I walk from behind the desk and wander down to cells, keen to be out of the firing line when Alex eventually tires of him and storms off. I look in on the inmates: a drunk, a flasher, a drug dealer and murder suspect. The flasher, a woman by the name of Amy Turnbull demands a glass of water so I fetch her one and head back upstairs. I hesitate before going around the corner, silence. Oh good, his superiors must have fucked off then, I wander over to the desk and stop dead when I hear a noise behind it.

"…Oh Gene…"

Was that D.I Drake? Nah, no way it couldn't be. I stand frozen to the spot, unsure of what to do. Shall I walk away and come back in five minutes? I could, but then anyone could walk by and no one else in the station would think twice about gossiping. Shit. Should I clear my throat maybe? Alert them to my presence? Oh shit. Shit. Shit!

Got it! I walk back the way I came and take a deep breath. I begin to whistle 'One step beyond' as I walk back towards the entrance. There's no way they couldn't hear me.

Aas I come around the corner I find Gene leaning on the desk blocking Alex from view. I know for sure that she's probably fixing her clothes and I'd have smiled, if it wasn't for the look the Guv was giving me.

"Where 'ave you been? We've been waiting for yer 'ere fer ages!"

"Sorry Guv, I had to go down to cells."

"Right well, you'll 'ave to go back down there now and bring that dealer MacLloyd up 'ere."

"Yes Guv."

I turn away from the desk and head back down to cells grinning from ear to ear. Yeah, life on the desk is pretty damn good.

Hope you liked it as much as i do! LSQ x