Shattered
SPOILER ALERT! If you haven´t read the manga til chapter 392, or watched the anime til episode 293, I warn you not to read what follows. If you still want to read this than I suggest you to AT LEAST watch episode 293 (here´s a link: .com/watch/bleach-episode-293/), which in my opinion is the best Bleach episode that has come out yet, and it´s much better than the manga chapter, for it perfectly shows Hitsugaya´s pain and I based this fanfiction on that episode.
I cried when I saw that episode. I sincerely did. And so when I began reading HitsuHina fanfictions I just wanted to write something about that moment, the moment which I think changed Hitsugaya completely. I just hope it´s not too sappy. And please, remember that English is not my mother language. So if you find errors feel free to correct me, I would be extremely grateful. Enjoy.
Silent. Everything was silent. It seemed as if the world around him had stopped. Froze, in that single moment when his world shattered. He began to slowly descend while the ice fell all around him, and the trap that he had carefully built for his enemy crumbled down in thousand of little pieces that reflected the sun like thousand little diamonds. But the beauty of this vision couldn´t cover the cruelty of what just happened.
He held her fragile body gently as if she could break into pieces in every moment. Yet he couldn´t stop the tremble in his body, and his breath that came out grasping as if he didn´t know how to breath anymore. The shock was too much for him to keep cool. Her blood was on his face.
It couldn´t be. Not him. He, whose only purpose was to protect her, to keep her safe, for he lived for her smile, for her smile that had the special power to make his black days alright.
He joined Shinigami Academy so that he could learn how to control his power, so that he could keep her safe, safe from everything and everyone. He worked hard to become a captain, so that she could look at him, no more as her childhood friend, but as a man whom she could lean on, a man who understands her, who can protect her. He failed once. He swore not to fail again. Yet not only he failed again, but this time he was the one who hurt her. He hurt what he held most precious in the world.
A sudden little move came from her dying body and she opened her empty eyes, who suddenly shone lightly when they recognized him. Among the infinite pain that came from her injuries he saw something else. Sadness? Confusion? Slowly, she opened her mouth, even that movement caused her pain, and spoke.
Shirou…Shirou-chan – she used his childhood nickname, a name she didn´t use for a long time. Her voice was soft and filled with confusion. – why?
And everything went black. Her murmur echoed in his head louder and louder until he screamed, a scream of pain, anger, hate. That pain swallowed him until he lost himself entirely and his mind went completely blank. He could perceive that he held his sword tight and was flying towards Aizen, but his mind no longer controlled his actions, guided only by the furious dragon inside of him.
He wanted to kill. To kill the man that played him and made him stab Hinamori. The man Hinamori had trusted with all herself, who used her like a pawn until she was betrayed and stabbed by him.
He didn´t hear the callings of the other captains, telling him to stop, and didn´t see the smirk on Aizen´s face while he attacked. He only saw Hinamori. Hinamori´s shy smile, that always had a shade of sadness, Hinamori´s laughing when they were children playing in the woods, Hinamori teasing him over his height, Hinamori´s tears when she understood the truth about Aizen, Hinamori´s desperate cry when she thought he was Aizen´s killer. Hinamori lying unconscious covered with blood after Aizen almost killed her. Hinamori. Hinamori. Hinamori.
He didn´t saw the attack, and by the time he realized what happened his arm and leg were already away from him. He couldn´t feel anything when he fell to the ground. He didn´t care. His mind just kept screaming and replaying his memories of Hinamori, always returning to that final, painful word. Why.