Rigby To The Rescue

By Shadowgate

…...

Gumball got home and as soon as he got home he turned on his CD player and listened to Motley Crue's Danger.

His mom knocked on the door and said "Gumball we need to talk."

Gumball shut off the music and opened his door.

"Your English teacher called and said you were sent to the principal today."

Gumball replied "my English teacher is out sick for the week and there's a substitute teacher named Mister Elkins."

Gumball's mother replied "yes that's who I talked to."

Gumball repeated "he's a substitute."

Gumball's mother said "well he sent you to the principal's office today."

Gumball said "as soon as he walked in the door he said 'Gumball you go straight to the principal's office because I saw you looking down and not focusing on your work.' I didn't do a damn thing and this jerk sent me to the principal's office."

Nicole gave him a frown and said "there's got to be more than that."

Gumball replied "Carrie was pissed and you can ask her that's all it was."

Nicole said "oh well I had better get back with the teacher."

Gumball said "he's a substitute teacher and he was just mean from the beginning. He's covering for my English teacher. Oh man I thought Mrs. Simian was bad but this fat hippo is awful."

Nicole said "it's not nice to call someone a fat hippo."

Gumball said "well then I'll just say he's a son of a bitch."

Nicole snapped "Gumball!"

After Nicole calmed down she said "now look I don't want you using that kind of language. Especially when you talk about a substitute teacher. Don't you think it's hard on him to have to come in to a new classroom and get to know everyone?"

Gumball answered "it sure would have been nice if he'd gotten to know me instead of rushing to an illogical judgment."

Nicole said "well I'll call the school back."

Nicole got on the phone with the school and talked with the principal who said Mister Elkins had left for the day.

Nicole went back to Gumball's room and told him Mister Elkins had left for the day.

Gumball said "well good you don't need to be talking to him."

Nicole said "well as your mother it's natural for me to be concerned when I find out you were sent to the principal's office. It's also natural for me to be concerned about the music you're listening to. You're listening to Motley Crue, Behemoth, Cannibal Corpse and Marilyn Manson. Oh my."

Gumball said "oh my they rock the house."

Gumball walked out his front door and went for a walk.

He stumbled upon a tall blue jay and a raccoon.

After introducing himself he got their names. Rigby and Mordecai were their names. Mordecai said "I don't care if you're a cat and I'm a bird we can still be friends."

Gumball asked them if they were into Motley Crue.

Rigby said "hell yeah they beat the shit out of lots of boy bands we had to grow up around."

Gumball said "growing up can be hard sometimes. I got this new substitute teacher and he's a real asshole. As soon as he walked in the door he sent me to the principal's office and claimed that I wasn't focusing on my work. We hadn't even met and he just threw me out of the class the second he walked in."

Rigby said "that's fucked up bullshit. Some substitutes are just mean and look for a reason to get kids in trouble."

Gumball went on to say "well then my mom got a call about it so I had to explain to her how unfair the situation was. Then when I called him a son of a bitch she got mad."

Mordecai said "well attacking mothers can cause an uproar."

Gumball said "well he's nobody's momma, he's a Goddamn hippopotamus"

Rigby laughed and said "I once had a hippo substitute teacher named Mister Elkins and he was meaner than a pit bull with PMS."

Gumball yelled "HOLY SHIT I GOT THE EXACT SAME SUBSTITUTE TEACHER!"

Rigby screamed and Mordecai said "well it's going to be a rough shitty week for you."

Rigby said "Gumball let's go smoke some reefer and listen to Black Sabbath."

Gumball said "fuck yeah."

THE END