She showed up to my front door unexpectedly in the middle of the night.
"Sam?" I said, peering at the figure in the doorway "It's one in the morning, what happened?" I asked.
"I came to say goodbye. I won't let you see me cry anymore Freddie. I'm gonna be fine now" she smiled weakly. Blood dripped rather loudly on the carpet, I saw the cuts on her wrist.
You come to me with scars on your wrist
You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this
I just came to say goodbye
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine
But I know it's a lie.
"Sam! Please! Let me help you! I swear! You don't have to go back there!" I pleaded as I grabbed her arm, pulling her inside and finding a bandage. She pulled away as I tried to wrap her wrists.
"No! Freddie, I'm fine. I promise. This is the last night I'll feel this way"
"No! Sam, look me in the eyes." I pulled her chin to face me so she could look in my eyes. "this is the last night you'll spend alone"
This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be.
The last night you'll spend alone,
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go,
I'm everything you need me to be.
"Sam!" I shouted "what made you do this!"
"It's always my fault, she says. It's a phase, I'll get over it she says to me, My own fucking mother! She won't care!" Sam cried, falling to the floor. A hint of a smile in her voice as she grew closer to death.
"But I will! Carly will! Spencer will! Your mother doesn't know you like we do!" I shouted, falling to the ground next to her.
Your parents say everything is your fault
But they don't know you like I know you they don't know you at all
I'm so sick of when they say
It's just a phase, you'll be o.k. you're fine
But I know it's a lie.
"Freddie, everything is going wrong for me, I want out. it's too late to fix this" she said weakly.
"No, Sam. Please hold on. please!" I said, putting as much pressure on her wrists as possible.
"Freddie, stop" she said, her voice barely louder than a whisper "It's too late" she smiled as she exhaled slowly.
"no!" I pulled her onto my lap, wrapping my arms around her tightly.
"I love you Freddie, goodbye" she whispered.
"It's not goodbye Sam" I said, picking her up "I won't let you say goodbye"
The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand I will help you hold on
Tonight,
Tonight.
Tonight, the beeping of her heart monitor was my song. He breathing was a drum beat.
"I won't let you say goodbye"
I won't let you say goodbye, The last night away from me,
I'll be your reason why.
Away from me.