A/N: I was bored and I probably should have been reading Lord of the Flies for school, but I couldn't focus. Earlier this morning I was watching a bunch of Psych and all I could think of Blaine having a childish obsession with bubblegum.
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, what did you people assume that or something?
Bubblegum and Meanies
"Ugh, Blaine, get that disgusting thing out of your mouth," Kurt said.
"Whaaat?" Blaine asked around a mouthful of bubblegum.
"That bubblegum, it's just horrendous, plus it makes your breath smell weird," Kurt said wrinkling his nose. They were at Burt's auto shop waiting for Kurt's dad to come out from the back so that they could give him his dinner that Kurt had brought him.
"But 'is so yummy," Blaine said, managing to pout around the pink glob.
"It may be yummy," Kurt said exasperatedly, "But that doesn't mean you should shove the entire pack in your mouth at once."
"Why not?" Blaine asked, acting like a five year old.
"Because no normal human shoves an entire pack of gum in their mouth at once! It's unnatural," exclaimed Kurt.
"But that little girl's doing it," Blaine said, pointing to one of the mechanic's daughters. It was bring your child to work day and he had brought his little six year old.
"No she is—"Kurt started to say, but then stopped realizing that, indeed, the little girl was chewing an entire pack of bubblegum. "How does she fit all that in her mouth" Kurt asked in awe.
The little girl seemed to notice the two teenage boys staring and skipped over. "Hi! Muy Nayme 's Caley," the little blonde girl said, smiling up at the two boys.
"Hi Caley! I'm Blaine," Blaine said, reaching out to shake the little girl's hand.
"Do you like bubblegum too?" Caley asked, her big brown eyes going wide.
"I do! What's your favorite kind?" Blaine asked, somehow managing to smile around all the bubblegum in his mouth. And now that Kurt thought about it, how did Blaine talk so well with all that bubblegum in his mouth?
"My favorite kind is the ones wit da pictuure o' da goose an it," Caley said, her eyes shining brightly. She turned to Kurt realizing that she didn't know his name. "Hi! Muy naymes Caley, wuz yours?"
"My name is Kurt," Kurt said, deciding that this little girl made bubblegum cute. "And aren't you an adorable little girl?"
Caley giggled, "Do youuu like bub'lghum too?" she asked Kurt.
"Only sometimes sweetie," Kurt said smiling at the way Caley's eyes seemed to get really big after the little girl realized that not everyone liked bubblegum as much as her. "Bhut why not? 'S so good."
Kurt laughed at the little girl. "You're just too dang adorable," he said lifting her up.
"And you don't like bubblegum," she said pouting.
"I know, isn't Kurt such a meany," Blaine said.
"Mhmmm," Caley said from her position in Kurt's arms. "I don't want to be held by a meany," the blonde added, halfheartedly trying to get out of Kurt's grasp. Kurt glared at Blaine over her head.
"If I'm such a meany, then nothing is going to stop me from taking you to my evil lair," Kurt said in his 'villain' voice. He spun the girl around in his arms and carried her over and into his dad's office. The entire time Caley was yelling, "Blaine-y, Blaine-y Help, Help!"
Blaine laughed and followed them into the office, "I'll save you Caley!" he promised before going into the 'evil lair.'
Kurt deposited his little hostage on the couch. "You'll never get her!" he said with an evil laugh.
"Bubblegum powers Unite!" Blaine cried, before he charged into Kurt and picked him up. He slung Kurt over his back, to which the boy retaliated by smacking his fists against Blaine's back. Caley watched the entire thing while giggling. Little did either boy know that both Burt and Caley's dad, Mike, were standing in the doorway watching them?
"Uh, Blaine," Kurt said, finally looking up to see that they had an audience.
"Daddy!" Caley cried, before running into the arms of her father.
Blaine meanwhile turned around slowly, still carrying Kurt so that he was now facing the doorway and Kurt was facing the couch.
"Hi… Mr. Hummel," Blaine said, before spitting his wad of gum out and into the trashcan.
"Hello, Blaine," Burt said, trying to keep from laughing at the fact that Blaine had forgotten that Kurt was still in his arms and was carrying his son. "If you wouldn't mind, can you put Kurt down so we can all eat?"
Blaine blushed before obliging and putting down his boyfriend. Kurt turned around and quickly straightened out his clothes, trying to regain some of his dignity.
Mike wasn't able to hold it in anymore and he began laughing hysterically, which spurred his daughter into imitating his action. "Why are you laughing daddy?" Caley asked, giggling.
"No reason, princess," her father replied. "I better be getting home," Mike said, now addressing Burt. "Say bye to your new friends, princess."
"Bye Blaine!" Caley said, before walking out.
"What? I don't get any love?" Kurt asked indignantly.
"No," Caley replied from the hallway. "You're a meany remember."
"This is why you should like bubblegum," Blaine said, grabbing Kurt's hand.
"Come on boys, let's eat," Burt said, grabbing the Tupperware out of the bag.
LINE
Later that evening the boys were on the couch kissing when Kurt suddenly pulled back, wrinkling his nose.
"What's wrong babe?" Blaine asked, stroking his sides.
"You still taste like bubblegum."
A/N: So the whole realisticness of a six year old being able to stuff a whole thing of bubblegum in their mouth and still be able to somewhat talk is completely valid. I know this because when I was six and at bring your child to work day I was bored and there was a vending machine. My record is two packs at once. I am aware that this extremely dangerous, but I was six. Plus, my older brother was there and he didn't seem to have a problem with it, then again, he thought the whole thing was entertaining.
Plus, I once got a whole bunch of kindergarteners to call my older brother a meany for an entire school year when he was in eighth grade and I was in third. Those were the good old days…
I Love You All!
~Ginger
PS: Go check out my other stories and please leave a prompt for my songfic one. Give me a song, and I'll have the boys sing it. It's called Just Plain Klaine. And yes, I totally just did some self-promotion.