Sanity's Edge
A/N: Het guys so this is my first Glee Fanfic and thats mostly cause of how busy I have been but the Idea is one I have had for a while. This is a Pezberry fanfic so expect a lot of that. and it is rated M for the later chapters. The story does have a lot of AU however the main concepts remain the same. Any questions ask i guess haha.
Summary: Santana has been through more then most can handle and god knows she is strong enough to handle it but everyone has it's limits. you can only take so much before you reach sanity's edge she just never imagined it's be Rachel Berry that would bring her there. Rachel Berry has always dreamed of saving Santana but to do that she must learn all of her secrets. Can she handle those secrets or will she break and even if she can. Is that enough to save someone as broken as Santana Lopez. I suck at summaries so please read o find out more.
Santana's Pov
"Abuela" I walk into the kitchen to see my grandmother slaving in front of the old stove like she always has. A big smile and dancing to the quiet salsa tunes she has playing lightly in the background. I look over to my cousin Maricella who had walked in with me, she was smiling enjoying the sight of our happy grandmother just as much as I was. "Hey abuela me and mari just came for breakfast before her first day at Mckinley."
"Hola mijitas, Santana I made you the pancakes you like with bacon and a plate of scrambled eggs and Mari I made you bacon and eggs con a bit of hash-browns I cooked up. That sound good?"
"That sounds amazing, I'm starving!"
"When aren't you starving, Mari all you ever do is eat."
"You would be too if it wasn't for your psycho coach." I laugh and take a seat besides my cousin while we both watch as my grand mother sets our plates. We both learned not to try to help her, she is independent like that, wants to take care of it all by her self: she's a lopez we are all strong enough to do it that's for sure.
"It's good to eat Santana it keeps you strong and alive. Don't let anyone try to push a plate away from you. With out food you'll never reach my age with my strength. So eat up girls"
" I hope I can be half as amazing as you at 60" I say sincerely.
"yea me too abuela you are kinda amazing" Maricella speaks
"Gracias I love you guys now eat up Mari you have to go to school with all those white kids with their money and pride."
"Hey abuela we may not have money not even Santana anymore but abuela we have pride, we are Lopez and damn proud of what we have. Broken or not we are fighters."
"True that Mari" I smile at my cousins words. Nobody knows strength like us three in the room, My world was picked up and crashed on top of me. Life has chewed me up spit me out and has thrown me to the pavement like great shit. But I still get up, I still stay strong well.. well atleast I let them believe I am. It's the Lopez way we aren't as strong as we seem but we won't let anyone know that.
"How do you two like living together?" "I can't believe you didn't come here I know things are hard but I'm always here."
"We know that but we are fine abuela we will be ok."
"Have you talked to your father Santana?"
"No.. No I haven't abuela I don't think I will for a while. Look we have to go. We're gonna be late."
"Mija I know we are strong but you need to let go sometimes or it's going to bury you, the both of you."
"We'll be fine abuela, I'll see you for dinner." I grab the last bit of eggs fill my mouth with them and run out the door with Mari trailing behind me. No one know how bad the incident with my family is all they know is, my father hates me and my brother is dead. To be honest I think those are the only things that matter anyways.
"Does she know?" my cousin asks randomly as we back out of the heights and into Lima.
"Know what?"
"You know Santi, that you play for my team?"
"How was I 'pose to know that was what you were talking about? And does she even know what team you play for because I doubt it" I feel my self boiling so I take a second before continuing "Look M abuela is all I have I'm not gonna risk that for a few confused feeling I had a year ago. Ok?" "I'm not like you I'm fine, I'm straight and I'm going to make her proud."
"Hey! Calm down Santi because guess what I am completely fine too, and I will make her proud... She.. she just loves us so much so I figued if she could accept you then theres hope for me too. "
"There is nothing for her to accept I was stupid and confused but I'm not anymore now no more mentioning that crap ok?" " I have enough in my plate, now come on we got a school to own" I smirk and she gets the hint while she visibly builds up her walls again..
"Lets do this Prima"
As we both walk in I bite back the laughter crawling in the pit of my stomach when everyones mouth drops. Maricella is a hispanic bomb, we look alike we act the same, I knew she was going to cause this, I mean there are two of us now these losers were scared enough with one.
I see Brittany and Quinn approach us and I warn Mari to be nice to them.
"Hey Santanna, Hey Santana number two"
"Hey Britt-Britt, this is my cousin Maricella, she's in Mckinley now."
"Hey" My cousin says in a refreshing calm tone she quickly turns her attention to Quinn as if she is almost testing her. Teasing to see if she will speak first Quinn's eyes size her up and turn a hue I never seen on her before. It was enlighting to say the least. She then opens her mouth to speak.
"Hi, I'm Quinn, If your Santana's cousin I'm sure I can expect you to be a bitch"
"Well considering you are her friend I'm sure I can assume the same."
"I wouldn't call us friends, I love her but we have a mutal war.." I smirk knowingly, my and q have always had this power struggle.
".. For dominance?" my cousin tests.
"I suppose you can say that"
"Well you have just declared it with one more person."
"I'm guessing that would be you"
"you guessed correctly.. up for the challenge"
"Hardly a challenge" and with that Q turns on her heels and walks away leaving me immpressed and surprised and Mari with a smirk the size of texas.
Rachel's Pov
The girl is gorgeous. She is a smile and a prayer wrapped up in one broken but perfectly strong package. Santana Lopez will be the death of me. She breaks me but builds me up and even though the whole world seems to believe that she can carry the world on her shoulder I can see how tired she is, how broken and weak she has been. I wish I could hold her and let her be the one able to repair for once. I Rachel Barbra (Man-Hands) Berry am in love Santana Maria (Satan) Lopez.
But today, today was different. She walked into school today happier then usual. It was cute, Her smile reached her eyes and her laugh was contagious. Not sure why she was so happy but I saw a girl beside her. The girl had a intense resemblance to my beautiful brunette, must be family of some sort. Part of my is screaming for me to greet her, I mean we have class together it wouldn't be completely strange. Plus I'm naturally curious and i really want to know who this stranger is. On the other hand I can be setting my self up for complete humiliation and every time I attempt to speak to Santana I get all confused on what I want to say and end up sounding like a disaster. Ah what the hell it's not like this will make a difference she is going to make fun of me either way, might as well kill my curiosity.
"Hello Santana how are you this morning?" "and Hello are you new?" I extend my hand which Santana quickly slaps away.
"Midget this school isn't that big, I'm pretty sure you already know she's new"
"My name is Rachel not midget and I was only being polite." the new girl looks at me strangely before speaking
"Rachel?.. as in Rachel Berry?" I'm confused as to how she knows me but nod anyways. She extends her hand this time which i happily shake. "Maricella.. Maricella Lopez, I'm Santana's cousin and yes I'm new. Actually would you mind showing me around, Santana is pretty bad at it." I can't help the smile that grows. She is knew maybe it would be good plus having a friend in this place wouldn't be so bad the fact that she's Santana's cousin is only a bonus.
"Yea, of course" I notice santana seems to be bothered by this whole idea. I mean why wouldn't she be her cousin rather have me "manhands" show her the school.. maybe this isn't so smart. "I mean as long as Santana doesn't mind"
"Why would she mind?"
"I don't if you wanna stoop down that low go ahead." santana spits as if it was a venom burning her tongue
"Great let me see your schedule.. oo I must show you the choir room. I'm assuming you are joining Glee club. We need new members and your cousin is in it so you won't be alone. Oh I'm pushing it aren't I." "Ugh I always do that."
"Hey slow down speedy ha I would love to join your club come on show me the choir room" "Bye Cuzzo" She smiles at me before whispering something to santana and then allowing me to drag her to my favorite room in this whole town.. well my second favorite.
Santana's Pov
I noticed the smirk painted on Mari's face when she found out who rachel was. See Rachel was my confusion last year. It wasn't much it's just I couldn't stop thinning of her and knowing Mari's situation I told her about it but that was before I realized I was over reacting. I mean I must have been over reacting I'm straight. I can have any guy I want of course I'm straight... "I'm Santana's cousin and yes I'm new. Actually would you mind showing me around, Santana is pretty bad at it." What is she doing?.. I can't stop the fire from burning my eyes turn to slits and I can feel my blood boil.
"Yea, of course" "I mean as long as Santana doesn't mind" Fuck maybe she noticed. Stay cool Lopez stay cool.
"Why would she mind?" She looks at me with that shitty ass smirk I would rip off her face if I could.
"I don't if you wanna stoop down that low go ahead."
"Great let me see your schedule.. oo I must show you the choir room. I'm assuming you are joining Glee club. We need new members and your cousin is in it so you won't be alone. Oh I'm pushing it aren't I." "Ugh I always do that." I can't help but smile at her rant. It's adorable.. Fuck what are you saying Lopez this is Manhands Berry she is disgusting nothing at all adorable.
"Hey slow down speedy ha I would love to join your club come on show me the choir room" "Bye Cuzzo" Her smile grew as she leaned into my ear "If your so straight i suppose you wouldn't mind me having a go.. I mean you have so much in your plate. I wouldn't want the truth weighing you down too" SH leans away and grabs Rachel's hand while the eager girl pulls down the halls. I can't help the sinking feeling my heart is feeling right now..