CHAPTER ONE: TRACE BEEN

Tsukiyama Shuu, who was new to the neighborhood, glanced around Washington DC. He'd recently moved from Tokyo. After Kaneki Ken mysteriously disappeared with the body of his best friend, Tsukiyama had found he needed a change of scenery. So to Washington DC he went. As the world's number one clothing designer, he got an offer from some school in the capital despite already climbing to the top in the fashion industry.

They had included the address of the school, and to his surprise, it was the White House. "Tres bein," Tsukiyama said. He knew he was fluent despite what everyone said. No doubt the president would be impressed. "But I wonder why I'm here?" Tsukiyama puzzled over this great mystery, and when he saw a helpful-looking (and delicious-looking) man stationed near him, he decided to ask him why he was here.

"Um, I don't know?" The man seemed just as confused as he was. Tsukiyama was let down by this man's incompetence. If he wasn't sure to taste like ass, he would have eaten him right then and there, in the middle of the day, in front of the man's co-workers. Ah, yes, his co-workers! Maybe they would know why he was here! As he meandered towards them, he was hit by a limo and went flying.

Tsukiyama would have issued a complaint, but before he could even open his mouth, the most beautiful man he'd ever seen stepped out of the black monster. His skin looked like brown satin. Was there even such a thing? Tsukiyama would have to keep this in mind for his new designs. "Hello, sweet cheeks, who are you?" Tsukiyama was going to use his sauve moves to seduce this wonderful and attractive man.

"I am the President of the United States of America. And Secret Service Men, please arrest this man." Tsukiyama had to get away quick, so he winked at the president who blushed bright red. "Nevermind, Secret Service Men, I'll do this myself." Tsukiyama felt a shiver go down his spine at the man's commanding tone. Totally... tres bein.

"Mr. President, you can't d-"

"Shut up, Steven!" the president yelled. "I'm the president, and I can do whatever I want."

"Sir, with all due respect, how did you win this election?"

"Because I'm awesome - unlike you Steven." Tsukiyama was captivated by this older man. He would not live to Kaneki's hotness, but he would have to do. He needed to get over the emotionally crippled and socially awkward/unstable person that was Kaneki Ken. Surely, an older partner would be more stable and less tsundere. He didn't just want to woo this manly man man... he needed to woo this manly man man. "Now, come with me, purple and red man." To put the cherry on top, he had noticed his great sense of fashion. Finally, someone who understood him.

The White House was like a castle except it was a house that was white. Tsukiyama couldn't believe it was, especially the interior decoration. A color for each room! It may not have been as large as his own home back in Japan, but it was better somehow. Maybe it was the man in front of him. His graying hair and deep set frown (or smile?) lines were really something. Tres bein, some might say. Totally not just him, everybody.

"Should we just go get it on, or should we talk first?"

Neither knew what they should do - each other or nah?

AN: I do not own Tokyo Ghoul although as you can see, I obviously should. I also do not own Obama, as unnecessary as it is to say that.

Haters to the left, and I don't remember what goes to the right, and I honestly don't care. Flames and reviews welcome. I am always up for constructive criticism although I kind of don't care what you have to say. This is a romantic comedy, and I plan on leaving it that way.