The Seduction of Eric Forman
…Eric gets a 40th birthday present that he doesn't expect
Extremely AU
Show canon stops at around season 5.
(character childhood canon is independent of that)
Chapter 1
Meeting Jamie
Comic-Con in San Diego
Eric Forman had spent what he felt was too much money on yet another Star Wars comic book that someone
was lucky enough to get Sir Alec Guinness to sign. He washed his hands in the restroom bathroom of the Omni
Hotel. He could sell it on Ebay or he could keep it in one of his storage boxes in the bank. He never did get to
marry his high-school sweetheart, Donna. Infact, he was single, just a path of broken hearts, no kid's. He
always wore a condom to make sure there wouldn't be any surprise children from women trying to come back
into the fold. He was alone and he hated it. Eric Forman was just an average guy, who lived in Madison, worked
9-5 at 1st Midwestern Bank, and understood what middle-aged or close to it disappointment felt like. He didn't
know where most of his friends were, it was true, no one kept in touch, it was such a lie. Even with the internet.
Donna was online and he could read all of her feminist rants on how men sucked. It was so one sided. Men
could be good single fathers, not all men were scum. She was so biased in her writing, yet she was praised for
it. The only person he saw regularly was Jackie. She owned this Happy Trails Restaurant in San Diego and that's
how he got advance notice on the hotel rooms being available for comic con.
Jackie was close to Red and Kitty, grateful for all of their help that she would sometimes join him for the trek
down to Miami Beach where they did eventually retire. Kitty thought Laurie should have the house. Eric thought
she lost her mind.
What could he do about it?
He lived in Madison like he was supposed to with Donna and he didn't really want to look out of his
bedroom window in Point Place to see the Pinciotti house. Eric had no idea what happened to Hyde, Kelso, or
Fez. The internet was only as good as people putting their information on it. He smirked at his reflection in the
mirror, Harrison Ford he wasn't, but just one year he wanted to be Han instead of Luke Skywalker, not that he
was Mark Hamill, but at least he looked somewhat better in his all-black Return of the Jedi face-off with Darth
Vader and Emperor Palpatine costume. Still he wished there was a woman out there for him. Not just anyone.
He wanted his quote unquote soulmate. If you can shape your own destiny, then maybe the same was true
with romance.
Maybe, it wasn't all in the stars. He couldn't go out to eat looking like a poor man's Han Solo, he had to change
into a black polo shirt and jeans. Maybe, he'd see Jackie at the restaurant and they could eat together. She
didn't have the best luck in the romance department either. It wasn't long after Jackie and Hyde got together
that they fizzled out, they tried making up after breaking up, but Hyde just woke up one morning, wrote a thank
you note to his Mother, and they haven't known of his whereabouts for 20 years. Even with the internet at their
disposal.
Who'd have thought Eric Forman's only constant would be Jackie? She wasn't married, had no boyfriend to
speak of and she had no children. Eric and Jackie did spend a boozy, hazy weekend together in the summer of
'83, but they mutually agreed to be friends as it took them a long time to get to that point. Eric went back into a
stall to change into his spare clothes that he kept in his duffle bag.
"Happy Trails to you! How may I help you?"
"Shouldn't you say happy trails at the end? Like Roy and Dale? Jackie, it's me."
"It's my restaurant. I can do what I want, ha ha! Hi, Eric. How are you?"
"I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I am bored out of my mind. How long are you staying at the
restaurant?"
"Until closing because I have to do paperwork. The special is roast beef, mashed potatoes with gravy, carrots,
and for you – the last slice of carrot cake – your Mother's recipe. Come in the private entrance."
"Thanks, Jackie. Who'd have thought we'd be the friends?"
"You finally came to your senses and realized having me in your life was a good thing!
See you soon."
"Bye."
He liked their friendship.
Jackie looked at her face in her compact mirror. She was going to stay 39 forever, no 40 for her. No one had to
to know her real age and if Eric revealed it she wouldn't give him any more free meals. Her multilined phone
rang. It was the hostess podium on line 1.
"Yes, Cindy?"
"Jamie, is here with your order."
Jamie Reed from Casablanca Cosmetics. Jackie didn't know much about the brunette beauty, but she was about
she was quiet almost, her eyes were aquamarine. Jackie was always eager to help a fellow businesswoman
out.
"Send her in…"
"Hello, Jackie," There was always something comforting in the way that Jamie said 'hello, Jackie' in a lilted voice,
if she swung that way, and no other woman made her feel this way, she would so have bedded this woman.
"Your order is in."
"Hi, Jamie. Thank you. Your check is in the ceramic owl," then Jackie had an idea, "Have you eaten yet, hon?"
"Not yet."
"Stay for awhile while I try on the new lip gloss palate that you sold me." There was something right about this
woman, the way she wore her skirts, knew how to accessorize with scarves, and the right shoes.
It was like she learned from her, which was impossible since she didn't know Jamie until she moved to San
Diego.
"What's the special?"
"Roast beef and the carrot cake recipe that I got from my friend's Mom…." Yeah, she could picture Jamie and Eric
together! Okay, she'd have split Eric's piece in half, but it would be more romantic that way.
"How about the carrot cake and a coffee?"
"Deal…"
Her phone rang again…the private entrance must have been locked. It was perfect timing.
"Come in, Eric."
Jackie wondered why Jamie was backing towards the door when she didn't even get her carrot cake and coffee
yet?
"I forgot that I have to make a delivery to that snot who runs the school board."
"Nonsense, Jamie. Stay for the cake. It's only my friend from high school Eric. You just might like him."
"Okay." She sighed
"Jackie, why was the private door locked? You know I don't like that Cindy…she keeps hitting on me," Eric
realized that there was someone else in the room. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you had company."
And beautiful company at that.
"Eric, this is Jamie, my cosmetics connection, but…. what happens when you get your bachelor's degree?"
"Nice to meet you, Eric." She extended her hand; "I'll still be doing this on side, apparently you never had
student loans."
"I have…Jackie's sweet, but she has no clue on the financial realities of the other lower classes."
"That's it," She smiled though, they a little bond, it was so cute, "I was going to split it, but Jamie gets the
the whole slice. I'll be back. Eric, be a doll, or action figure…why don't you two go into the private dining room?"
"So," Eric decided to start the conversation as they walked out of Jackie's office and into the blue room. "What's
your major in?"
"What was yours?" Jamie asked first making sure they sat at the booth that way there'd be no chivalry with Eric
trying to pull out her chair.
"Accounting."
"Education."
Eric could sense this undercurrent of tension, it wasn't like Jamie didn't like him, it was like Jamie was afraid to
talk to him. Eric thought he was a sweet guy no matter what crap Donna said or wrote about him.
"Here you are…are you sure you don't want dinner, Jamie?"
"No. Just the cake, Jackie."
"Your coffee will be up shortly. I had to teach the new girl how to make it, if you can believe it. What did you
want to drink, Eric?"
"Just a diet soda. Don't want to be buzzed on my flight…"
"Flight?" Jamie questioned
"Yeah, I work in Madison, Wisconsin. I was just in for Comic Con, but I have to go back to work on Monday."
"Oh," Jamie almost burnt her tongue on the hot coffee. "It was nice meeting you, Eric. Jackie, I really need to get
going…. I left you some new skin care samples…"
Jackie didn't buy this for a second. She knew about relationships and she knew about people who ran away
from them.
"I must be something to make a woman run away after talking to me," He faintly looked at his black Timex, "for
five minutes. A new Forman record."
"I know in today's day and age I shouldn't do this…but I think it'll be okay if I do…I'll be right back."
5 Minutes Later
Jackie handed Eric Forman a cosmetic catalog with an address stamped on the back
J. Reed
10 Royal Place Apt. 4B
San Diego, CA
92101
Casablanca Cosmetics Consultant on the web under JReed
"You want me to chase after this woman?"
"Yeah…I've known Jamie for a few years, but I don't know much about her, except that she'd be perfect for
you…. so yeah. If she gets mad tell her I gave you her address."
"I don't know, Jackie. I seemed to scare her off."
"No…I think she was afraid to get to you know you…. Go for it, Forman."
Damn it. There wasn't a wine bottle big enough to make her forget this night. She wondered if she had any
cocaine left since she tried it in '84, but didn't want to fuck up the life that she took great care and caution to
build. She took off her clothes and was ready to step foot into a hot shower when the buzzer rang. It could be
the set of records that she ordered. She slipped on her pink zip-up robe and went to do the door, her bare feet
cold on the tile.
It was Eric Forman. Jackie! That woman could never quit interfering in things that were none of her concern. But
he did look handsome with his hair windblown and his twitchiness about to rise to the surface because he
thought he did something wrong.
"I'm sorry to disturb you, Jamie. Jackie just…."
Fuck it.
She put her arms around Eric Forman and pulled him to close to what she hoped was the best kiss of both their
lives.
Jamie hoped he felt the same way, yet she hoped that he didn't feel the same way, this was long overdue, he
was Eric Forman of Point Place the man she loved ever since she was twelve years old.
It was a shameful secret then and it was a burden to carry now.
Yes, she wanted him to feel the same way.
Eric Forman was all she ever wanted.