Miria Prologue: Words
Words…why is it that words are the most important part of our lives…how is it that we are reduced to words to remember our fallen comrades? I don't know why but as I wake, I know that many are dead, yet I still have the hope that they will open their eyes; that they will need rest, we all would after such a beating, my waiting was in vain…
"Nnn," I am shaking with grief, "Seven…even though there were so many…this was my best? Was this truly the best that I could do?…nnn,"
Hot tears spill down my cheeks at my own failure. I have failed them, and guilt courses through me. It should have been me that died not them! I scream silently, the tears running down my cheeks as the grief threatens to truly overwhelm me. There isn't anything that I can do. Not a single thing to help me work through the worst moment in my life. The pain overwhelmed me and I couldn't seem to free myself from it. Tears blinded me as the guilt and pain chocked me. If all I had were words then so be it, I would have those words in my heart, forever until I died.
I sobbed my heart out and was rather surprised by the fact that Helen and Clare both lifted me up to my feet,
"Look Miria," said Deneve, "These are the lives that you have saved,"
Cynthia, Tabitha, Yuma, Helen and Clare all looked towards me and Deneve continued, "It was good fortune that you were our leader, I believe that from the bottom of my heart,"
I sobbed again, if only she knew the burden that I alone had to carry, the grief that was tearing my heart out as I knew that only seven of us had survived, if only I could turn back the hands of time and save them, if only if only…but the words I think are useless, meaningless and all too late to change anything now. I half wonder what would of happened if I had been better, if I had done better, if…if…I will never know and now I am forced to face myself.
Words are all I will ever have…