"Okay, ladies, you ready?"
The bride tosses the bouquet up into the air and straight into Maya's head. She doesn't even flinch.
Maya Hart is beautiful, this she knows. Her angelic face, however, is tainted by an ever present sour face.
The world told her early on that she was broken and would never get anything she wanted; the world never changed its mind. She's not only broken, but broke as well. Also, her career is a joke and her boobs are smaller than her motivation.
Life has cheated Maya and she's not letting it forget it.
Hope is for suckers, after all.
And so is marriage. She stands up and kicks the bouquet back to the hungry hungry hippos. As they scramble at her feet, she swipes a bottle of champagne from the table and heads toward the gift table.
"...which was really weird, but I figured, free booze, why not? Sometimes it's just plain fun to witness the beginning of an absolute trainwreck, so when the house goes up in flames you can say you were there when they put in the shitty wiring. Sure, marriage could be considered an act of bravery, but so could jumping into the subway tracks for a quarter. Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is congratulations."
Missy and Josh stare at him dumbfounded. Lucas just smirks at the newlyweds.
The bride glares at him, "You're unbelievable."
That he is. Lucas Friar is talented in many ways: he was a star athlete in high school, his IQ is almost as high as his roommate? (too childish) tenant? (he doesn't pay rent so) live-in housekeeper/cook's (yes, that'll do), and he published a novel. Also, he's exceedingly good looking and has never had trouble getting girls. He does, however, fail at keeping them. Not that it bothers him; he has no actual interest in keeping anyone.
Love is for suckers, he says.
And so is marriage. It does not surprise him one bit that Missy has fallen for it.
"Oh, just admit it, Missy. You only invited me to spite me."
Missy gasps. "Excuse you? I invited you because I thought we could be friends."
"That's bullshit and you know it. What kind of idiot is friends with their ex?"
Josh puts his hand on Lucas's shoulder (which is immeadiately shaken off), "Bro, you better cool it. That's my wife you're talking to."
Missy takes her new husband's hand, "It's okay, Joshy." Lucas can't help but snort. "I can deal with him myself. Go check on Riley or something. She must be so sad that people are having more fun than they did at her wedding."
Josh gives Lucas the universal "I'm watching you" signal and leaves the former couple alone.
"As much fun as you claim this is, I'm out."
"You just love making everything about you, don't you?"
"Yeah, pretty much. Almost as much as you enjoyed passive-agressively rubbing your happiness in my face. At least I would have done it directly."
"Ooh, your commitment to honesty is soo refreshing. You're not the original you think you are. And your drawl is stupid."
"Excuse me? I'm not original? Wow. That is hilarious coming from such a–" Lucas stops himself. "No, you're right. This day isn't about me."
Missy is positively fuming. "Such a what, Lucas? Tell me. I'm dying to know what the amazing Lucas Friar thinks about me."
Lucas takes a deep breath. Here goes nothing.
Maya watches as Missy fights in the middle of the dance floor with the rando ex she invited for some reason.
She doesn't care to listen in on it, but it started escalating enough to steal her attention from her current mission.
Suddenly Missy starts crying and Maya decides she's bored with all of this.
She uses the opportunity of the crowd gathering around the sobbing bride to start shaking gifts. She decides on a medium sized box, grabs another bottle of champagne from an abandoned table and walks out casually.
"Talk to her again and me and my boys will mess you up."
Lucas stares up at Josh from the bottom of the carpeted steps at the entrance of the Plaza, where the groom and two groomsmen have thrown him, "Who talks like that?"
"I'm serious, Lucas."
"Fine. Enjoy your sham of a marriage."
"I will!" Josh and his friends head back inside, while Lucas sits at the bottom step.
He takes out a cigarrette and lights up.
"You have another one of those?"
i know what you're thinking. "another story? when she hasn't updated the last one for two months?" and the answer is yes.
anyway, this will mostly be a writing excercise (meaning short chapters where i try my best to actually adapt the lines but end up copying them verbatim from ytw which is an awesome show on fxx that you should all be watching) because i have been suffering from writer's block and i don't want to give up on things done, so between this little fic adaptation thing and Texas, i'm hoping i'll get my groove back.
(i included a little shoutout to my favorite lucaya writer tiramisupiece aka marna aka actual angel because i stan for her so hard.
i think it's pretty obvious if you know her fics.
fun fact: it's actually one of three fics of hers i haven't been reading regularly because i want her to finish it in order to read it fully completed)
p.s. i'm not 100% sure on the rating. the show gets pretty sexual, but i suck at writing smut, so i'll keep it implicit.
also, keep in mind that the characters will be literally the worst. everyone will most definitely be ooc but that's what i hope will be great about it. the whole point of ytw (the show) is that these are terrible people, yet extremely likeable at the same time.
finally, a disclaimer: i do not own gmw or ytw or any of it's characters or dialogues