Dante Learns to Swim (or a better title, Band-aids at the Bottom of the Community Pool)

It was sometime before Devil May Cry 3. Let's just say that this is happening in the month of July and that Dante and Vergil were twelve at the time since twelve is a good number and twelve's the letter before thirteen. Anyway so Dante and Vergil were at the community pool since their mom was sick of hearing them argue over the Atari or whatever they play with and who gets more ice cream and jellybeans and stickers as she washed their socks for the tenth time that day.

So they were sitting around the pool and Dante was busy checking out some eight grade girls as he pocket the packet with his popsicle but before he did that he started striking all these poses with it just so he could look really bad ass for said girls. Vergil rolled his eyes at him and took another bite of his popsicle only to find that all he had left was the stick.

"Hey, stupid. Gimme your ice cream," he shoved Dante just before he did another pose.

"What? No way, you have your own," Dante growled and shoved him back even harder.

"Well, I want yours, too."

Dante spat on it and then proceeded to slobber all over it, forgetting that he still had the attention of the girls. He gave his twin a smug look and held it so it almost touched Vergil's nose. "Still want it?"

Vergil threw the popsicle stick so it would get stuck in Dante's hair. "Ugly!"

Dante dropped his popsicle down Vergil's shorts. "We look the same!"

Once Vergil recovered from that he fished the popsicle out and asked his twin, "Do you know how to swim?"

"What? Well, I guess not but..."

He shoved him in the pool. "Swim, dog!"

He got a good kick out of that but then he got bored after ten seconds so he went to get another popsicle. Once Dante sank, he stayed underwater. Vergil considered helping him but then he remembered Dante stole his jar full of JollyRanchers. (He stuck them up his nose though. That's probably what they call poetic justice.) Then this morbidly obese guy fished Dante out and gave him CPR. When Dante woke up he got grossed out because he thought he was getting kissed.

Then he remembered what just happened and he was going to yell at Vergil but then Lady walked by. She was getting ready to dive in with her weird noodle floating apparatus thing (or whatever it's called) but then Dante started hitting on her. "Hey, baby, you wanna..."

She hit him with said weird noodle floating apparatus and walked away.

"You fail, Dante," Vergil laughed.

Dante started pouting and turned his back to him. "...Hate you..."

But for the record he got back at him by hanging Vergil's underwear on a flag in front of the school their junior year of high school. Vergil never forgave him for that... Yeah.

Author's Note: I'm sure no one knows me since I've got mostly Yu Yu Hakusho stories. I won't introduce myself because chances are I'm not going to pop back in this side of the site too often. Anyway this was part of the FAIL Project. If you want to know what that is PM me and I'll get back to you ASAP.
Hope you enjoyed this. -Much love, JC