Girlfriend

Based on the song by: Avril Lavigne

Pairing: Lavender/Seamus and Ginny/Seamus, and Parvati/Dean

Summary: Lavender likes Seamus, Seamus likes Ginny, or so she thought. Now, Lavender will stop at nothing to get her man, even if it means tearing them apart.

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil sat outside on the other side of the Black Lake on a sunlit April day.

Lavender glared across the lake at Seamus Finnigan who was in a full frontal snogging session with his new girlfriend, Ginny Weasley, who was straddling his lap.

"Look at her, that red headed slut!" she scowled.

"Seriously, give 'em time, they'll be doing more than that out here, in the open." Parvati said, looking over the top of the copy of Witch Weekly she had been reading intensively.

"I really, really, don't like her." Lavender scowled, ripping the grass out of the ground on the right side of her.

"You just think she's a bitch because A. her best friend stole your boyfriend, and B. she has what you want." Parvati said.

"So what if I do, it still doesn't give her any right…"

"Now I'm not taking sides or anything, but she's at all liberty to snog who she feels like, and you had your chance."

Lavender shot her a menacing glare, "Yeah so what, I may have turned down his kiss after the ball and all, but how did you feel when she was snogging your man."

Parvati clenched her fists, "Yeah, that wasn't exactly my favorite sight ever."

"I've got a plan, Ginny Weasley is going down, and Seamus is going to be mine, it's game on." Lavender said as she stalked up to her room, taking one menacing glare at the still kissing couple.

"Don't hurt yourself girl!" Parvati called after her friend as she went back to her magazine

You're so fine
I want you mine
You're so delicious
I think about ya all the time
You're so addictive
Don't you know what I could do to make you feel alright?
(alright alright alright alright)
Don't pretend I think you know I'm damn precious
Hell yeah
I'm the one and only princess
I can tell you like me too and you know I'm right
(I'm right I'm right I'm right)

She's like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that's what everyone's talking about!

Lavender went into the Gryffindor 7th year girls dormitories and slid a huge pink trunk from under her bed.

She went into the bathroom and locked the door.

"If anyone has to take a piss in the next hour, they're screwed!" she hissed as she turned the lock.

She popped open the trunk to reveal a huge collection of muggle make-up ranging from lip gloss to nail polish.

She began by pulling her hair up into a better, and higher ponytail then the dilapidated one that was slowly falling down that she was now wearing.

She put a curling charm on the ponytail to make the ends wavy and bouncy.

Lavender applied several layers of make up and hairspray before walking into the dormitory and taking a fresh uniform out of the wardrobe along with a white camisole with glitzy lace at the top and went back into the bathroom to put it on.

She unbuttoned the top few buttons of her shirt to show the camisole through the top.

She gave herself a once over in the mirror, "Ginny Weasley, you're going down, you maybe hot, but I'm 10 times hotter."

She went into the common room, only to be gawked at by about 7 first year boys.

Lavender rolled her eyes as she stormed down the stairs only to meet up with Seamus and Ginny at one of the end staircases.

"Hey Seamus." She said, eyeing Ginny, and grinning a mischievous grin.

"Hey Lav." He said, giving her a once over and literally turning his head to watch her walk away.

Lavender continued down the stairs only to look back to see Ginny, with a menacing look on her face ask him, "What was that for!"

She burst into a fit of giggles as she continued down the library, where she met up with Parvati.

"Parvati, you should have seen this!" Lavender burst out as soon as her foot stepped into the Library door.

"Miss Brown, be quiet, you are disturbing everyone!" Madam Pince snarled.

"Fine." She said, as she ran over to the table that Parvati was seated at, working on her potions homework.

She began to tell the story in full detail, fighting back a fit of giggles here and there.

"You are determined to make every Weasley hate you, aren't you." She replied.

"No, what do I care if little miss Potter-obsession likes me or not, after all, she's a year behind me." Lavender rolled her eyes, "Seamus could do so much better, I mean, for Merlin's sake, he could at least go out with someone in his year!"

"I think you need to just run up to him and just snog the living day lights out of the boy and spare yourself." Parvati said sarcastically.

"Haha, very funny." She smirked.

Chorus
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

I can see the way, I see the way you look at me
And even when you look away I know you think of me
I know you talk about me all the time again and again
(and again and again and again)
So come over here, tell me what I want to hear

Better yet make your girlfriend disappear
I don't want to hear you say her name ever again
(And again and again and again!)

She's like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that's what everyone's talking about!

Minutes later, the girls got up and headed to the Great Hall for dinner.

The first thing Lavender noticed was the huge open space next to Seamus and Ginny.

She eyed Parvati.

"Oh no, you're not going to.." she was cut off by Lavender grabbing her arm and plopping both of them down beside Seamus.

"Hey Seamus." She said, flashing a 100 watt smile.

"Hey, what's up?" He said.

"Nothing much, you?" she asked, giving Ginny a sarcastic glance.

"Nothing here either." Seamus said.

"Seamus, you forgot to tell her that you gave me your lucky medallion." Ginny said, pulling a gold chain out from under her robes and flashing a circular pendant with the Kenmore Kestrels logo on it.

Lavender's eyes widened in immense jealousy as he replied awkwardly, "Uh, yeah, I did, didn't I."

"Very cool." Lavender grinned, lying through her teeth.

"Isn't it though," Ginny replied, resting her hand on Seamus's shoulder.

Seamus stared down at the table for almost the remainder of the dinner.

He took his eyes away from the table to glance over at Lavender to have her smile at him flirtatiously.

He looked away quickly, but still eyed her out of the corner of his eye.

After dinner Parvati and Lavender headed up to the common room in deep discussion.

"That, That, frigid bitch!" Lavender scowled, "I can't believe Seamus gave her that necklace!!!"

Parvati glanced at her friend, "Seamus knows."

"What, Seamus knows what?" Lavender hissed, still pissed off from the whole Kestrels pendent incident.

"He knows that you two are beginning an all out war for him." She said.

"How the hell do you know!" Lavender snarled.

Paravti shuddered at her language, she knew the only time Lavender cursed was when she was off the meter angry, "Because, did you see the way he wouldn't talk during dinner, or how he kept looking at both of you like he was a little afraid."

"Maybe, but I don't care, nothing is stopping me now, she may have lost Potter, but she is not, and I will not let her move in on Seamus!"

"Uh Lavender, she's kinda already moved in and staked her territory." Parvati stated.

"Fine, I will not rest until I'm the one straddling Seamus in public!" She scowled, hurrying up the stairs and leaving Parvati in the dust.

"To each her own." Parvati shrugged as she headed back down the stairs to meet up with Dean.

Chorus
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend

In a second you'll be wrapped around my finger
Cause I can, cause I can do it better
There's no other
So when's it gonna sink in
She's so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?

In a second you'll be wrapped around my finger
Cause I can, cause I can do it better
There's no other
So when's it gonna sink in
She's so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?

Lavender continued to curse under her breath as she ran up the stairs.

She entered the portrait hole and slammed the door behind her.

She stalked in and plopped herself down on a couch.

Lavender looked over her shoulder and noticed that Seamus was seated at a desk in the corner of the room working on his homework, alone.

She turned around and smiled wickedly into the fire burning in the fireplace as she took a deep breath and headed off in his direction.

She sat down in the seat across from him and lowered herself at his level, since he was hunched over his potions book.

"Hey there." She grinned.

"Hey Lavender." He said.

"No Lav?" she thought, "That sucks."

"What are you working on?" she said.

"Potions essay, you done with yours?" he said.

"Finished it with Parvati this morning." She replied.

"Cool, I've been meaning to ask you all night, what's up with you and Ginny, you guys used to be friends and now your having a row?" he asked.

"Uh," Lavender ransacked her mind for a decent, non exposing answer to his question, "Uh, yeah, well, I have a bit of a problem with her, that's all."

"What?" Seamus said.

"I just don't think she's quite right for you." She replied.

"And why is that?"

It all came out like word vomit, "She's the slut of Gryffindor and will snog any guy that is available."

Her hand shot over her mouth.

"What gives you the sodding right to judge her?" Seamus scowled.

"Uh," more word vomit, "I can't stand seeing you two together, it drives me insane, I want to be with you so bad that I'm literally trying to split you two apart, because I've liked you since the Yule Ball."

Again her hand shot over her mouth, as she thought for sure, she was really going to vomit.

"I-I'm going to be si- I have to go." She said, running out of the common room and down the stairs.

As soon as she heard foot steps coming up behind her, she picked up her pace.

"Lavender, wait up!"

She stopped in her tracks as she felt someone whirling her around by her shoulders.

She stared into Seamus's eyes as he began, "Are you serious, like, everything you said."

"Yes." She simpered foolishly as she tried to break apart from him and make another attempt at running away.

"Woah, because I—"

Lavender suddenly felt a rush come over her that she had never felt before, and she knew if she didn't do this now, she would regret it.

She leaned up and kissed Seamus dead on the lips.

He began to kiss back, and as they broke apart Lavender stared at Seamus as he smiled.

"So what do you think of Miss Weasley now?" she smirked as he let go of her and looked into her eyes.

"Who am I kidding, nothing beats that!" Seamus said, carelessly tossing his hands in the air, putting his arm around Lavender and trying to think of ways to shake off Ginny Weasley for good.

Chorus
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way!
I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I could be your girlfriend

Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me
No way! No way!
No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your girlfriend
No Way No Way...