(I own nothing!)

(This will most likely be a series of one shots. The main character will mostly be Simon since he is the easiest for me to write. There will be slash. And any continuation of a one shot will be marked. Enjoy!)

Story: (takes place in Ariel after Mal warns/ threatens Jayne and leaves him in the outer hold

Mal climbed the stairs his mind whirling. Jayne would most likely not try to sell Simon and River out again, but over the years Mal had learned that people surprise you. He thought back on what Jayne had said countless times 'they ain't apart of this crew and they will end up getting us killed!'Simon and River filled the last to empty spot that no one had known needed to be filled. But that didn't change the fact that they needed protection and put his whole crew at risk just being here. And Mal hated protection details and even more so when you're not getting paid. River could take care of herself but that brother of hers was as dangerous as a foal and just as easy to startle. His lily white skin and dark eyes reminded Mal of a foal he had owned on the ranch. It had been completely white and it's eyes wary of everyone. Mal could still remember the look on the horse's face, a constant look of fear on its face.

"Captain?" Mal jumped and turned to see the very thing his mind had been dwelling on. (Simon not the horse.)

"What you doin' down here, Doc? There something you need?" Mal studied the Doc, his eyes blatantly staring. He realized that the Doc was looking at him expectantly.

"Well?" Simon asked arching his eyebrow.

"Umm…Run that by me again." Simon sighed and Mal was sure that if not for his core breeding Simon would have rolled his eyes.

"I said that I need to give you this shot. It's a booster shot, it came in with the supplies." Mal noticed that Simon left out the fact that they had been stolen. Simon reached out for Mal's arm and began to swab it with a foul smelling alcohol.

"Where did you learn to plan heists like that?" Mal asked watching as Simon filled the needle with a clear liquid.

"If you're asking if I have done criminal activity before in my life then I must inform you that it is none of your business." Simon said pushing the needle into Mal's arm.

"If you're on my ship it is my business." Mal placed a hand on Simon's hand stopping his work. "And I don't need someone getting killed because of something you're not telling me."

"Anything I'm not telling you is for a reason. I got my sister out an Alliance facility without anyone stopping me." Simon said changing the subject. "So what I can't figure out is how the feds found out we were at the hospital. You have any guesses?" Simon injected Mal.

"Well, maybe someone saw you?"

"Someone used their ex-ray vision to see through the caskets?" Simon slid out the needle. "Mal, my plan was flawless. The only way it could have gone wrong was if someone tipped off the feds that we were coming." Simon placed a piece of gauze over the puncture sight.

"Well, there were a lot of people there that could have…"Simon cut him off.

"I chose that hospital because of the placement of the police stations. The feds would not have been able to get there if they had not already been tipped off as to our location."
"Well…"

"Mal, you and your crew seem to be under a false assumption that I can't take care of myself. And as much as I appreciate it, I can deal with Jayne on my own, thank you." Simon said looking at Mal.

"How did you…?"

"Know? Simple he's the only one that would be stupid enough to trust the feds. Anyway it was part of the plan. I knew Jayne wouldn't miss an opportunity to get me and River off the ship, so I used it to my advantage. So not only do I now have a better understanding of the kind of people their sending after River, but Jayne is so worried that the rest of the crew, myself included, will find out that he'll leave me alone for a while and I can do some work without interruption." Mal stared at Simon slack jawed. Simon smiled.

"Well, I better go let Jayne in and give him more of that hero bullshit." Stretching Simon walked off in the direction of the cargo bay. Mal stared after his retreating form. Yep, people really can surprise you.