"HEARTACHES" - Chapter 1
"Did you talked to him?" asked Rachel as Joey entered their appartment
"yeah... the guy is a wreck Rach... he's not fine at all with all this" replied Joey as he sat on his favourite chair
"And what did he say?"
"Well... he said we shouldn't stop just because of him, that you two haven't date in 6 years, and that he will try to be ok with us being... you know.... "us""
"He's right... we haven't been together is 6 years Joe"
"But still Rach... you two belong together... even I know that... you are 'Ross and Rachel'... that's the way it should be" said Joey looking down
"No Joe... we are not 'Ross and Rachel' anymore... that's over... and it's been over for a while now"
"Yeah... that's what he said" Joey lifted his head to look at her "Maybe you should talk to him.."
"Me?... why me?"
"Cause it's you... it would mean a lot to him to know that you still care about him... and don't tell me you don't cause I know you do"
"I do care about him... he's my friend, and the father of my daughter... but I don't see what's the big deal... he's with Charlie now, isn't he?"
"Yes he is..."
"Our relationship it way over... I just... don't feel that way about him anymore... I feel that way about you" she said approaching to him
"Why are you doing this Rach?"
"Doing what?"
"This... 'us'... six months ago you were still in love with Ross... and now.. suddenly... it's all gone?"
"Well... uhm... I..." rambled Rachel without knowing what to answer "I think so... yeah... that's the way it works I think... beside... Ross wasn't doing anything about our relationship, and when he had the opportunity his insecurities and his jealousy ruined everything once again, and I got tired of waiting for him... I won't wait for him to fight his deamons the rest of my life, so I decided to finally move on" said Rachel trying to hide the sadness in her voice
"I see... the thing here isn't that you have feelings for me... the thing here is that you wanna have feelings for me... it doesn't work that way Rach"
"It's not like that Joe... it's not like that at all"
"Yeah... we'll see" said Joey standing from his chair and heading to the bathroom to take a shower, everything was clearer now
Rachel was left by her self on the living room. She knew Joey was right, it didn't work that way, but if she wanted to be happy she had to make it work, no matter what, loving Ross hurted too much, and she was tired of being hurt. She had decided to move on and who better to move on into than Joey, he was caring, willing to give her so much love and didn't have to fight any personal issues to do so. She loved him, well... not quite yet, but she was sure one day she will cause she wanted to love him with all her soul, she needed to love him, it was the only way she could stop loving Ross.
*~*
Ross was still laying on the couch in his appartment, with a huge headache "I knew there was a reason why I normally don't get drunk. Luckyly Emma is still asleep" he thought and then remembered, he had to take Emma to Rachel's, he wasn't ready to see her, not right now at least, he wasn't strong enough, specially after last night faliure attempt to be "fine" with the situtation. "How did we get here?" he said to himself. His last mistake had costed him much more than he could bare, now that Rachel was with Joey he had finally lost her forever.
Ross stood up to get a glass a water from the kitchen when he heared a knock on the door.
"Rachel?! Wha... what are you doing here?" he asked
"I just came to check on you" she aswer "and to pick up Emma... I supposed you wanted to sleep"
"yeah... kinda... but Emma is a little angel... she's sleeping now"
"I figure" Rachel was still standing on the hallway "can I come in?"
"yeah, of course... I'm... I'm sorry"
Rachel entered the appartment and place his purse on the arm chair
"Give me a second" said Ross entering to the kitchen to get an aspirin
Rachel sat on the big couch and her eyes stopped on the table, there was a photo album, 'their' photo album. She took it, looked at the cover and then sighed. There was written 'R&R always'. She had bought that album for their 6 months anniversary as a gift to him, and both had filled it with picuters of both of them together when they were going out. "I can't believe he still has this". She opened and started to look through the pages. When she was coming near the end she realized there were new pics, pics of her, Ross and Emma together in the park when Emma was 4 months old, pics of her and Emma when they arrived home after the baby was born and a lots of other pics she had never seen before.
"I thought that would make a nice present to Emma one day" she hearded Ross say from behind the couch
"Yeah... it would... it's... it's really beautiful" she said "I didn't think you'd still have this"
"I'd never through it away Rach. I probably shouldn't say this because you are my best friend's girlfriend now, but those were the best moments of my life"
Ross' words took Rachel off guard, she was speachless "Ross... I... I... wanted to talk to you about that..."
"you don't have to explain anything to me Rach... I'm fiiiine"
"Ross?... you can lie to everybody... but you can't lie to me... I was here last night... I know you are not fine"
"But I should be fine Rach, I let you go... I made a mistake... you moved on and that's ok.... I'm happy for you... and I want you to be happy, and with me you'd never be happy Rach"
"Why are you saying that?"
"Because... because I always end up hurting you, and letting you down... I'd wanted to be with you since I was 16, and when I finally had the chance to do so I blow it... I even cheated on you..."
"You... you didn't cheat on me... we were on a break Ross" she said looking at him
Ross smiled "it looks like we switched phrases huh?"
Rachel smiled back "yeah... it looks like we did" she stared at him for a moment "but inspite of everything that happen, I've never regreted the time we were together Ross... and if I had to live it again... well... I would"
"I know... I would too... but that's not the point here Rach.... the point is you deserve much more than me, and that's why I'm gonna try the hardest to be ok with the idea of you and Joey together.... don't let me be the one ruining your happyness again... he loves you a lot, he's crazy about you"
"I know... I know he is... he's a great guy" she said, looking to the window, not wanting to face Ross
Ross stare at her for a while, that was it... her happyness was way more important to him than his, and Joey deserve her much than he ever did. He knew this was gonna be hard, but it didn't matter how painful or how much heartaches this will bring him, it was the right thing to do, and for the first time in a long time... he was doing the right thing with Rachel
to be continue...
"Did you talked to him?" asked Rachel as Joey entered their appartment
"yeah... the guy is a wreck Rach... he's not fine at all with all this" replied Joey as he sat on his favourite chair
"And what did he say?"
"Well... he said we shouldn't stop just because of him, that you two haven't date in 6 years, and that he will try to be ok with us being... you know.... "us""
"He's right... we haven't been together is 6 years Joe"
"But still Rach... you two belong together... even I know that... you are 'Ross and Rachel'... that's the way it should be" said Joey looking down
"No Joe... we are not 'Ross and Rachel' anymore... that's over... and it's been over for a while now"
"Yeah... that's what he said" Joey lifted his head to look at her "Maybe you should talk to him.."
"Me?... why me?"
"Cause it's you... it would mean a lot to him to know that you still care about him... and don't tell me you don't cause I know you do"
"I do care about him... he's my friend, and the father of my daughter... but I don't see what's the big deal... he's with Charlie now, isn't he?"
"Yes he is..."
"Our relationship it way over... I just... don't feel that way about him anymore... I feel that way about you" she said approaching to him
"Why are you doing this Rach?"
"Doing what?"
"This... 'us'... six months ago you were still in love with Ross... and now.. suddenly... it's all gone?"
"Well... uhm... I..." rambled Rachel without knowing what to answer "I think so... yeah... that's the way it works I think... beside... Ross wasn't doing anything about our relationship, and when he had the opportunity his insecurities and his jealousy ruined everything once again, and I got tired of waiting for him... I won't wait for him to fight his deamons the rest of my life, so I decided to finally move on" said Rachel trying to hide the sadness in her voice
"I see... the thing here isn't that you have feelings for me... the thing here is that you wanna have feelings for me... it doesn't work that way Rach"
"It's not like that Joe... it's not like that at all"
"Yeah... we'll see" said Joey standing from his chair and heading to the bathroom to take a shower, everything was clearer now
Rachel was left by her self on the living room. She knew Joey was right, it didn't work that way, but if she wanted to be happy she had to make it work, no matter what, loving Ross hurted too much, and she was tired of being hurt. She had decided to move on and who better to move on into than Joey, he was caring, willing to give her so much love and didn't have to fight any personal issues to do so. She loved him, well... not quite yet, but she was sure one day she will cause she wanted to love him with all her soul, she needed to love him, it was the only way she could stop loving Ross.
*~*
Ross was still laying on the couch in his appartment, with a huge headache "I knew there was a reason why I normally don't get drunk. Luckyly Emma is still asleep" he thought and then remembered, he had to take Emma to Rachel's, he wasn't ready to see her, not right now at least, he wasn't strong enough, specially after last night faliure attempt to be "fine" with the situtation. "How did we get here?" he said to himself. His last mistake had costed him much more than he could bare, now that Rachel was with Joey he had finally lost her forever.
Ross stood up to get a glass a water from the kitchen when he heared a knock on the door.
"Rachel?! Wha... what are you doing here?" he asked
"I just came to check on you" she aswer "and to pick up Emma... I supposed you wanted to sleep"
"yeah... kinda... but Emma is a little angel... she's sleeping now"
"I figure" Rachel was still standing on the hallway "can I come in?"
"yeah, of course... I'm... I'm sorry"
Rachel entered the appartment and place his purse on the arm chair
"Give me a second" said Ross entering to the kitchen to get an aspirin
Rachel sat on the big couch and her eyes stopped on the table, there was a photo album, 'their' photo album. She took it, looked at the cover and then sighed. There was written 'R&R always'. She had bought that album for their 6 months anniversary as a gift to him, and both had filled it with picuters of both of them together when they were going out. "I can't believe he still has this". She opened and started to look through the pages. When she was coming near the end she realized there were new pics, pics of her, Ross and Emma together in the park when Emma was 4 months old, pics of her and Emma when they arrived home after the baby was born and a lots of other pics she had never seen before.
"I thought that would make a nice present to Emma one day" she hearded Ross say from behind the couch
"Yeah... it would... it's... it's really beautiful" she said "I didn't think you'd still have this"
"I'd never through it away Rach. I probably shouldn't say this because you are my best friend's girlfriend now, but those were the best moments of my life"
Ross' words took Rachel off guard, she was speachless "Ross... I... I... wanted to talk to you about that..."
"you don't have to explain anything to me Rach... I'm fiiiine"
"Ross?... you can lie to everybody... but you can't lie to me... I was here last night... I know you are not fine"
"But I should be fine Rach, I let you go... I made a mistake... you moved on and that's ok.... I'm happy for you... and I want you to be happy, and with me you'd never be happy Rach"
"Why are you saying that?"
"Because... because I always end up hurting you, and letting you down... I'd wanted to be with you since I was 16, and when I finally had the chance to do so I blow it... I even cheated on you..."
"You... you didn't cheat on me... we were on a break Ross" she said looking at him
Ross smiled "it looks like we switched phrases huh?"
Rachel smiled back "yeah... it looks like we did" she stared at him for a moment "but inspite of everything that happen, I've never regreted the time we were together Ross... and if I had to live it again... well... I would"
"I know... I would too... but that's not the point here Rach.... the point is you deserve much more than me, and that's why I'm gonna try the hardest to be ok with the idea of you and Joey together.... don't let me be the one ruining your happyness again... he loves you a lot, he's crazy about you"
"I know... I know he is... he's a great guy" she said, looking to the window, not wanting to face Ross
Ross stare at her for a while, that was it... her happyness was way more important to him than his, and Joey deserve her much than he ever did. He knew this was gonna be hard, but it didn't matter how painful or how much heartaches this will bring him, it was the right thing to do, and for the first time in a long time... he was doing the right thing with Rachel
to be continue...