Kendall and Logan fluff after Logan's rough night at work.
I do not own Big Time Rush, the characters, the show or the music.
Kendall sat on the couch and stared at the clock across from him. Logan would be home from work any minute now and he knew that if he wanted to see his genius of a boyfriend, he would have to grab him right as he stepped over the threshold into their apartment.
As if on cue, Kendall heard the door squeak open and in walked his boyfriend covered in exhaustion. Kendall strode over to the shorter man, wrapped his arms around him and kissed his temple. Logan grinned and mumbled out a simple greeting.
"How was work tonight?"
Logan answered with a simple look and walked around Kendall. He dropped his keys in the dish next to the fridge, put his coat away in the closet and sat on the couch. Logan pinched the bridge of his nose and shut his eyes with a frustrated sigh. He ran his hands over his face, trying to wake himself up a little bit as he leaned forward to untie his sneakers.
"It was...difficult."
Kendall followed Logan's tracks and sat down next to him, wrapping an arm around Logan's shoulder. Logan leaned over and rested his head on Kendall's shoulder. Kendall felt his boyfriend's shoulders rise and fall in a more relaxed pattern and knew that he was starting to calm down.
Since Big Time Rush ended, Logan had become a doctor as he had always planned. Kendall played for the LA Kings to be with Logan while he finished school. He was grateful that their dreams didn't have to make their relationship suffer. They did it together, just like the did everything else in their lives since the day they had met. He was happy. Logan was happy. They both got what they had always wanted. However, Kendall felt bad on nights like tonight when he knew Logan needed some time to relax. Medical school was hard on him, but he finished early and found a great hospital to work in. He knew Logan loved it. He also knew that Logan was still trying to learn how to detach his emotions at work, but that was never easy for the passionate man. Kendall on the other hand needed his emotions when he was working. He had tried to focus on strictly playing once, but without the anger, the happiness, the frustration or the rage, the game wasn't the same. Instead, he threw his emotions into how he played every game and used his off season to relax and return to the calm, level-headed man he always was. He knew Logan couldn't do that so easily, so instead, Kendall became his off season. Kendall was the place where Logan could relax whenever and wherever he wanted. Kendall's arms were Logan's safe haven, his home. He crawled into them every night and neither one of them ever complained.
"I'm sorry."
Logan chuckled and leaned up to kiss his lover's neck. "It's okay, Kendall. There's not much you can do about a rough day at the hospital."
Kendall frowned and sighed. "Yeah, but I wish there was. I hate seeing you upset like this."
"I know. But trust me, you're helping. This," Logan gestured to himself and his boyfriend cuddled on the couch listening to the tick of time and each other's heartbeats. "This is all I need after a day at work like today. This is all I need right now."
They were silent for a while. Kendall ran his fingertips along Logan's broad shoulders and they traced along his arms. Logan smiled at the way the path his fingers ran along seemed to be warmer than the rest of his skin. Under the hand that Logan had rested on Kendall's stomach, he could feel the taller man's breathing become shallower and his heartbeat become louder and faster. He didn't need to see his face to know that his boyfriend was deep in thought about something.
"Loges, what happens when I can't fix your day? What happens when something bad comes along and you don't want to come into my arms anymore? I never want you to not come to me."
Logan could hear the panic in Kendall's voice and felt the anxiety rolling off of him. He sat up and faced Kendall, who was staring at the wall in front of him, eyebrows furrowed together.
"Kendall," Logan pleaded. Kendall looked at the ground. Logan sighed and ducked into Kendall's view. The blond closed his eyes and rested his head on the back of the couch and sighed once more. "Kendall, look at me."
Kendall listened this time, noticing the frustration in Logan's usually angelic and calm voice.
"I don't know what's gotten into you today or where this is coming from, but you are wrong. Your arms have always been a safe haven for me. You will always be safe for me. Nothing can ever change that."
Kendall's lips formed into a straight line as he slowly nodded his head in agreement. Logan wasn't convinced.
"Ken, I love you. Ever since we were twelve you have always had my back. You have always protected me and made sure that I was okay. It hasn't changed in the last twenty-one years and I don't ever see it changing. I never want it to. After a long day at work, the only thing that gets me home is knowing that you're here waiting for me. When I'm on call at the hospital at night, I can't go to sleep without calling you. Even then it isn't enough to just hear your voice. I want to feel your arms wrapped around me. I want to feel your kisses on my back. I want to hear your breathing. I just want you."
Kendall stared into Logan's eyes looking for pity or annoyance. He found only love; genuine love. Kendall grinned and pulled Logan into a hug.
"Thank you. I love you, too. I just wish you never had to have a bad day. I wish I could take that all away for you."
"You do it everyday, Kendall. Even right now when you're apologizing for nothing, you're making me fall more in love you and forget about my day."
"More in love with me? Is that even possible?"
Logan chuckled and looked at his boyfriend. "Apparently so. It may be borderline obsession now."
Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's body and lightly kissed the raven haired man. Logan tangled his fingers in the curls at the base of Kendall's neck and pulled him closer. Their lips moved together as Logan ran his tongue along Kendall's lips. Kendall's opened instantly and Logan mapped out the inside of his lover's mouth, as if he didn't know his way around already.
Kendall pulled away then and stared into Logan's eyes while he caught his breath. Logan kissed Kendall's chin and got up, heading to their bedroom to change out of his scrubs.
Kendall followed him down the hall and watched as he put on his favorite grey sweats. His breath was taken away as Logan tore off his scrub top, balled it up and shot it into their hamper. Kendall cheered and clapped, and Logan shot him a sarcastic smirk. Kendall laughed as he walked over to Logan, kissing his bare back before it was covered by a black t-shirt.
They crawled into bed together and Logan found himself once again in the love of his life's arms. He could never get sick of this. He loved the feeling of being protected by Kendall's strong arms. He loved knowing that he fit perfectly by Kendall's side in a way no one else ever would. They belonged together, and he never doubted it for a second.
Kendall squeezed Logan a little tighter and pulled him a little closer. He kissed the shorter man's forehead and felt something that he couldn't name. It was more than love, more than contentment, more than happiness. Bliss wasn't the word for it either, though it could go on the synonym list. What Kendall was feeling felt like forever. He felt like he could hold Logan forever and it wouldn't be enough. He felt like Logan could be his forever, and even that wouldn't be enough. But when Logan pulled Kendall's hand up to his lips for a quiet kiss, he knew he wanted more than forever, but if forever was all he could get, he would gladly take it.
"Logan," Kendall muttered. Logan moaned to let him know he was listening. "No, Logan, come on. Look at me."
Logan grunted and rolled over to look at his boyfriend. His hair was slightly messed up, his eyes looked tired and giddy all at once. He wore a smile to match his eyes, and in the moonlight, Logan could have swore Kendall's eyes were wet with tears.
"What is it, Ken? Are you okay?"
Kendall chuckled and gently rubbed Logan's cheek. "I'm perfect."
Logan sighed with relief and went to turn over when Kendall stopped him.
"Logan, I love you. You know that right?"
"..yes, Kendall. I'm well aware. You're starting to make me nervous though. What's going on?"
"Don't be nervous. Everything's fine. Just let me talk, okay? Even if I start rambling, just let me get to my point."
"Alright, go ahead. I'm all ears."
"God, I love you so much." Kendall wrapped an arm around Logan's waist and let the other rest on his neck as he lightly stroked his cheek. "I have never loved anyone the way I love you. You make me feel like I'm so much better than I know I am. You make me want to try to earn your love. I am so lucky that I have you. I don't know how it happened, or who was helping me out, but you're mine and I love you so much. I never want to be without you."
"I told you that you never would be."
Kendall twitched his head to the side a little and Logan snapped his mouth shut. He locked his lips with an invisible key and threw it on the floor.
Kendall smiled, kissed his nose, and went on.
"I know I'll never be without you, but just the mere thought of it makes me sick with worry. What would I ever do? You've been in my life since we were twelve. You've been in my heart for twenty-one years. You're all I think about. You're all I'll ever need. You're all I'll ever want. You are happiness, Loges. You've changed my life in so many ways and you continue to do it each and every day. I don't know who I would be or where I would be without you and I never want to find out."
Kendall stood up and pulled Logan with him. He stood in front of the window, and he could see that Logan's eyes were beginning to water, matching his own.
He knelt down on one knee and held Logan's left hand between his own. Logan's mouth pulled into a smile wider than his face and he began nodding his head before Kendall even spoke.
"Logan Hortense Mitchell. I love you with all of my heart and every single fiber of my being. I gave my heart to you so long ago and I want you to know that when you gave me yours, I promised to protect it with my life. You are my life. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me, Logan?"
Logan fell to his knees and pulled Kendall into such a passionate kiss, that it knocked the wind out of Kendall's lungs. He wrapped his arms around Logan's waist and he could feel Logan's hands tangling in his hair. Logan pushed his tongue into Kendall's mouth and Kendall groaned. They continued for what felt like eternity, though it was only for a few minutes. Logan pulled away and placed his hands on either side of Kendall's face. He was still smiling as Kendall wiped away a stray tear that had traveled down Logan's cheek. Logan looked at Kendall and began to laugh softly, still swinging his head from side to side.
"Yes, Kendall. Yes! Of course I will marry you."
Kendall pulled him into another kiss, this one all teeth and tongue and it had never felt better. Kendall's worries from earlier in the night all but disappeared as he kissed his fiance.
As they pulled away, Kendall kissed Logan's forehead. They climbed back into bed, and Logan yet again curled into Kendall's embrace that began to tighten until it was impossible for Logan to be any closer to him. Kendall giggled and kissed Logan's temple.
"I love you so much. And as my first of many promises to you, I promise to never stop loving you, or telling you how much I do."
Logan smiled and kissed Kendall's arm that was wrapped securely around his shoulder. He was home. He was safe. He would be with the love of his life forever, and nothing had sounded more promising and full of hope to him before.