Okay, so I took a small break from my other stories to write a quick oneshot and here it is! The Thundermans happen to be one of the few shows today that I really like. I figured taking a step back would help me with writing These Scars he Holds and Superphantom, both of which will be updated real soon.
"But I guess you don't want to rule the world."
"Why am I even listening to you?"
"Soon you'll be just like me!"
"I will never be evil like you!"
"I will be even more evil."
"Stop following me, Max."
"Just leave me alone!"
"I will show you what danger really is."
"You've been acting like an evil jerk ever since you used Dark Mayhem's powers... You never gave them back-"
"It's my evil now, and it's stronger than yours ever was."
"I guess I'm out of chances."
Guilt. That was all Pheobe could feel as she watched the scenes playing out in front of her. She saw flashes of memory, destroyed cities, figures lying lifelessly all around her and the people she used to call family- some wounded and others, like her twin, stood tall against her.
The first time she had these dreams was the night they returned home from Hawaii.
Her first thought was, 'Why did her family look at her like that? Shouldn't they be fighting whoever was causing this chaos?'
It wasn't until she noticed the black gloves on her hand that she realized what exactly was happening. All she could do was scream and beg for forgiveness only to be denied.
After that, every night she would have the same nightmares. Everyday it was different but also the same. Some days her family would be powerless as she took over the world, others they would be fighting her with all they had but every night without fail one sentence would be uttered that would make her blood run cold and her faith in herself disappear.
"It's no use. Our little girl is gone."
She knew deep down that the way her dad spoke it in her nightmares with such animosity was not they way they meant it... but that didn't stop the intensely growing self-hatred she held for herself.
Almost in a daze, she continued watching the dream- this time memories- play out before she inevitably woke up. Hopefully, if she were lucky enough, she would wake up closer to morning than she normally did.
Pheobe shot up, she couldn't bring herself to cry anymore since she knew she deserved what she was getting. She turned and grabbed her phone to check the time.
The clock read '11:24' making the teen groaned in dismay, knowing she would never fall back to sleep.
She pulled herself tiredly out of bed. She quietly made her way out of her room, not bothering to look at the mirror knowing well that she would see the near black rings around her eyes from thr lack of sleep from the past two weeks and a pale complexion from all the stress- both of which she easily hid behind makeup and a fake smile throughout the day.
Her mom and dad had asked her how much she remembered and she had lied, saying not much- just a bit from the beginning.
It seemed as though everyone had forgiven her and moved on, but for some reason there was a voice in her head that always convinced her they hated her that they would never truly forgive her. She lied to them, still lies to them.
She tried to hide it from Cherry at first but Max had spilled the beans. He apologized and claimed he thought she had already told her best friend but the voice in her head pressed that he was lying.
'He wants everyone to know you can't be trusted. That you failed.' Her thoughts had told her, manifesting themselves into a vision of herself. She had two red streaks in her hair and the black suit she had worn when she was a villain. She didn't know why she believed what she said, but she did.
She entered the living room, stopping briefly at the entrence to her brother's ex-evil lair turned bedroom. She contemplated going down to confide in Max, but decided against it.
She shouldn't drag him into her problems, especially after he risked his life to save her from something she got herself into. She sighed and continued into the kitchen grabbing a drink from the fridge and she took a seat at the table.
'You know you liked being evil, Pheobe. You still can be.' Villain Pheobe grinned.
"No, you're wrong. It wasn't me- it was Dark Mayhem's power." She defended.
'That may have been true, at first. But you enjoyed it, the rush of power, the feeling you could do anything.'
'Truthfully, you didn't want to get rid of those powers. You still want them, but you're too scared to tell anyone. You know if you told them they would hate you- they would lock you away because you are dangerous.'
She couldn't stop the flurry of thoughts from taking over and she could feel her heart and breath starting to race in an all too familiar matter.
Max PoV
It's been almost three weeks since we stopped Pheobe from taking over the world. Of course it wasn't her fault, if it weren't for my childish prank she never would have had to use Dark Mayhem's powers to begin with.
Pheobe seems alright at first glance, I almost believed her when she told mom and dad she didn't remember much, but witnessing her first freakout told me I was right to be suspicious. She has no idea I saw her.
It was two days after we returned. I happened to be up late when I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. At first I didn't think much of it, but the footsteps seemed to stop when they reached my lair. I was prepared for someone, most likely Pheobe, to come down but instead they continued until I couldn't hear them any more.
Curious, I decided to silently make my way upstairs to see what was going on.
I was slightly shocked to find Pheobe crouched over in the kitchen chair. She was gripping her usually well-kept hair and her. Her shoulders were shaking violently and I could hear the muffled sobs. I wanted to go up and find out what was wrong, but I had a few guesses.
Still, I hated seeing her look so broken. I was about to say something when she spoke.
"You're right," At first I thought she had heard me and was talking to me, until she continued, " I remember everything. But I can't let them know that.
'So she does remember.' I thought in slight surprise. 'But why lie?'
"If they knew that they would get rid of me. I know that! I don't want them to hate me... I don't want..."
After a moment of silence she spoke weakly. "I can't tell Max...No..."
I couldn't make out everything she was saying but I knew it wasn't good. Out of nowhere she stood up and slammed her hands on the table, making me jump in shock.
"SHUT UP!" She raises her voice slightly. Her voice was slightly horse but I can hear the desperation in it. A bunch of small items fall over and I hear Pheobe gasp.
"Pheobe." I whisper, not loud enough for her to hear.
She turns and for some reason I panicked and hide behind the wall. She storms out of the room and up the stairs to her room. I followed, wanting to make sure she was okay.
That night I stood outside her door and she sobbed for a good hour and when I was somewhat sure she cried herself I went back to my room and thought for a while.
After that night I noticed things everyone else seemed to miss. Like how she would shrink away from touch, or how she was wearing more makeup than usual, and randomly throughout the day she would just stop and purse her lips together as if she were told something.
I screwed up majorily when I brought up Hawaii to Cherry and I could swear I saw betrayal and fear in Pheobes eyes. I tried to make it right by apologizing but I could tell something in her just couldn't believe me, even though she claimed it was fine and she would have told Cherry anyway.
After that I tried to stay back and observe, hoping she would come to me on her own- otherwise I would go to her if I noticed she was getting worse.
Mistake. The longer I waited the more nervous I got when it came to confronting Pheobe.
"Tonight I will confront her." I determined.
"Well, speak of the devil." I say to myself as I listen to the footsteps.
I stand up and try to prepare myself. Before I make my way up the stairs I hear the door open and close.
My eyes widened in fear and I shoot up the stairs.
Pheobe PoV
I can't take this any longer. I can't sleep I'm always scared that my family doesn't trust me anymore. Even Cherry looks at me differently- I know she does, even if she tries to act normal.
Any time I start to think they may really forgive me that voice in my head makes me feel worse, more scared and anxious.
"It would be better if I just left." I say to myself.
But where would I go?
'You could always-' Villain me says.
"No! I won't be that weak!" I nearly shout, trying to keep my voice low.
'Yet you have no problem doing this to yourself?' She points to my arm. My breath catches in my throat at the indication.
I grab the sleave of my shirt and pull at it while chewing on the inside of my lips.
"That's different." I say angrily.
'Oh really?' She hummed humorously. ' What would mom and dad think, what would they say? How could someone who is supposed to be a superhero do something a low as cutting? You feel guilty? Tell you what, how about to save your family the embarrassment and take yourself out of the picture.'
I know what she's suggesting and it could be the lack of sleep or the ever growing guilt talking but it seems like a very tempting idea.
If anyone were to find out about any of this it would be bad for them. I can imagine the shame and embarrassment they would have to endure.
"Maybe you're right- no! No. I can't." I feel confused and actually scared for a lot of reasons.
I stand up. "I need to clear my head." I say to myself.
'Are you sure that's what you are doing?' It teased.
"Shut up." I deadpinned as I opened the kitchen door and exited the house. After giving the house one last look I make a startling realization that I'm feeling something.
I can't quite place it but it's between that of relief and nervousness. I opt to ignore the feeling of dread that increases with each step.
"Whatever happens, I deserve it."
"Pheobe! Stop!" I jump at the sudden shout that came from the last person I wamted to see me like this. So instead of turning around I do the only thing I can think of. Run.
Max PoV
I race out of the house and look around. Luckily, I happen to see her out of the corner of my eye making her way to the street.
I jog a bit closer to her and call out her name. I sigh in relief when she stops and start to walk over to her.
My heart stops when she takes off running down the road and without a second thought I case after her.
She's fast, but luckily I've always been slightly faster so it didn't take long before I caught up to her.
I grab her arm and pull, causing her to stop. I'm unsure whether to be thankful or worried that she is not struggling or saying anything.
"Pheobe." I say, at a loss for words.
"Why did you follow me?" She asks, voice shaky.
"Because you were running, duh." I try to joke back, failing epically at lightening the mood.
"I was just going for a walk." She said.
I notice she still isn't facing me and I figure by the slight movement of her shoulders that it's because she's crying.
"So, why run when I call out to you?" I attempt to steer the conversation in order to keep her from diverting it.
Her head lowers before she answers. "Nobody was supposed to know."
Vague.
"Know what?" I ask.
"I was supposed to be gone before anyone woke up- it's better this way."
"What the hell are you talking about?!" I near yell in confusion, fear rising in my blood. It isn't until she that, that I noticed a strange and disturbing feeling in the palm of my hand.
"What the-" I whispered breathlessly. I pull her arm up, causing her to turn in my direction, but her face is the last thing I notice because the first thing is a bunch of angry marks on her forearm.
"Pheobe... Why?" I ask in shock. She pulls her arm out of my light grip and cradles it. It doesn't take much longer before it all clicks.
"You were coming out here to take your life?!" I yell, causing her to recoil, but I'm so mad... so scared that I don't care at first.
"Jeasus, Phebs! What the hell were you thinking? That you would just disappear and we wouldn't notice or care? How could you be so stupid!?" I begin ranting.
"How do you think that would makemom or dad feel? What about Nora, or Billy, or Chloe? What about me? Didn't you stop and think how we would feel? Or are you just too caught up feeling sorry for yourself because you became a villain once?" I knew it was wrong for me to say that and I regretted the last part as soon as I said them, especially after I took a good look at her.
The streetlights managed to illuminate her just enogh to see what I had missed all this time.
For once there was no makeup to hide behind and I could see just how bad off she really was. Her eyes had dark rings around them, that kind of intensity came from days of little to no sleep. She looked tired, no more drained than anything. She made no attempt to hide the defeated look that was now painfully evident in her eyes.
But right then there was a flood of emotions swirlling around. I felt sick just at the thought that I had let this get so bad.
"She never stops." I barely hear Pheobe whisper.
"Every single day she's there. Telling me how bad I screwed up. How I don't deserve redemption. When I start to feel a little better, that maybe everybody really did forgive me for what I tried to do... What I did do... She comes back and ruins everything."
"Who?" I ask, cruious as to who is hurting my sister this badly.
I was not even close to being prepared for the answer I got.
"Me." She pauses. "Not me- me but the evil me. At first it was just thoughts that came and went but soon I started to see... her? Me? It?" She shakes her head, turning away. I stay on guard in case she tries to make a break for it again.
"That doesn't make any sense." I respond, followed by a hollow laugh that sends chills down my spine.
"I know. And that's why I have to... disappear." She turns around and there are tears freely rolling down her cheeks.
"What if Dark Mayhem's powers did something to me that can't be fixed? What if I go bad for good, or hurt one of you? I was so scared that if I told anyone even half of the things I see or even think that they would give up on me and lock me away like... him."
"That's not going to-" I start to debunk that belief only to be interrupted.
"Even dad thought I was beyond saving last time! I'm pretty sure Nora and mom thought so too. The worst part is I don't blame any of them!" She sways and I rush to grab her arm while she loses her balance. When she's on her knees I grit my teeth in anger- mostly at myself.
"Dad and them had no right to say anything! They had to right to give up on you like that, but I promise you, Pheobe, as long as I'm still around I will NEVER give up on you or anyone in this family. If you do go bad again I will bring you back to your senses because that's what you did for me- the only difference was that I had a choice... you didn't. You're my twin, and no matter what we are a team and I have your back."
I found myself getting extremely embarrassed at my speech, but I refused to let that get in the way.
Pheobe stares at me for a long time, her tears still there but slowing. All of a sudden she's looking behind me and the fear returns.
I flung around to see who is there but when I see nobody I grow concerned.
I was about to ask what was wrong when she spoke, seemingly to no one.
"It's true... it has to be... he would't lie... Leave me alone... I don't... I can't..."
I hear her breathing pick up and she begins shaking under my arm.
"It's her, isn't it?" I ask, though I had a pretty good idea.
She doesn't respond and instead continues to talk to the hallucination. I continuously attempt to get her attention and clam her down, but every attempt failed. Her breathing became even more erratic and she started to struggle against my hold, apparently attempting to flee from whatever it told her.
When she finally made a comment about ending her life I snap. Without thinking my hand connects with her face and he seemed to do the trick. She held her cheek with her free hand and stared back to me in confusion.
"Pheobe, can you hear me?" I ask sternly to hide my growing fear.
She gives me a nod and Isigh, wrapping her in a hug I didn't know I needed.
"Don't ever say you'll take your life!" I demand. "I couldn't live if you did that. You're my only twin and it kills me to see you in so much pain. Whatever you're seeing, whatever you're hearing- it's not true!"
She grabs my arms firmly and chokes out in sobs. "Make them stop! Please!"
"I wish I knew how. I swear I do. But please, believe me, I will do everything I can to help you through this- you're not alone." I offer, angry that I couldn't fix this or fight off the thing causing my sister pain.
We remained silent for a while so I help Pheobe up and lead her to the local park.
The walk was a long and quiet one, but I didn't mind. It gave me time to think, organize my thoughts and feelings about recent events. I never let go of her hand, feeling almost like kids again when I would lead her home after beating up some bullies that messed with my sister.
We sat down on the bench and I let go of her hand. It's then the silence becomes deafening. I try focusing on the chirping of the locusts and rough croaking of frogs. I wanted to break the silence but I figured it'd be best to let Pheobe wait until she was ready.
"It wasn't one time." She randomly says, grabbing my immediate attention.
"What wasn't?" I ask, genuinely confused.
"New Orleans." She simply said. I was still confused for a decond before it clicked and I nearly jump out of my seat.
"That was NOT your fault! Nor was it you! That does not count!" I argued.
She sighs. "It may as well have been. I'm the one who let myself get tricked into removing the one thing that was protecting me. And just like... then... I couldn't do anything but watch as I tried to destroy everything I love."
"Pheobe." I say. "I'm going to ask you a question, andbI want you to answer honestly. Can you do that for me?"
She hesitates but nods.
"How much do you really remember?" I ask bluntly.
She tenses up. I believe I already knew the answer but I needed to hear her say it.
"Everything. I remember watching everything. And all I could do was scream. It felt like I was watching myself through a screen, I couldn't speak or move. I felt so useless." She keeps calm as she explains.
"I tried to go to you." She added. My brows scrunch in confusion.
It takes me a second before something clicks and once again I feel sick to my stomach. "That morning before the trip." Was all I could say.
She nods and all of a sudden I'm seeing red. I shoot up from the bench and pace back and forth in front of it.
"God! I'm so stupid!" I grumble.
"You didn't kno-" she starts but I cut her off before she could finish.
"Don't. You tried to tell me but I was too busy being childish that I wasted your only chance to say something. It all makes sense now. The syrup, the weird remarks. God, Pheobe. This is really all my fault." After ranting I sat down dejectedly in the bench.
"It's not your fault, Max. I'm the one who kept the powers, that's on me." She tried to defend me, how ironic.
I let out a humored chuckle. "You wouldn't have had to use those powers in the first place if I hadn't tried to pull that stupid prank."
She looks at me for a moment before sitting back, facing the star-filled sky.
"We both screwed up, big time." She stated. I follow her lead and maktch positions so that I could see the sky.
"Yeah, but you're the one who is paying for it. Pheobe, you know you could have come to me sooner. I would never abandon you like that."
"I know." She replies. "But..."
She pauses and so I finish for her, having a pretty good idea where she was going. " 'She' scared you out of getting help."
She nods. "Well, you're not alone in this anymore, you hear me? If you hear or see her again, no matter what just come to me, anytime anywhere... except the bathroom, that's off limits."
She bursts out in laughter, sitting up. I chuckle along with her and I felt glad I could at least do this much to help.
"Seriously though, just promise me that no matter how bad things seem to get, don't ever try something like this," I grab her arm with the cuts, "again. If you need to vent just-"
"Come to you. I know." She cuts in. I laugh and playfully punch her in the arm.
"Shut up." I joke. "We still got a few hours of night time left. Let's say we get home and get some sleep."
"Can we just stay out here a little longer?" She asks. "The sky looks really- peaceful- at night."
It doesn't take a genius to figure out she doesn't want to get nightmares so O agree. "Whatever you want. But if mom and dad catch us out here this late I'm throwing you under the bus."
She chuckles. "Whatever."
"I'm glad we're twins." I say, the feeling of neasua rises in the pits of my stomach from the cheesiness of the line butnI push it back.
"Me too." Is all she says before we sit in silence watching the stars.
Pheobe and I have been through a lot together. I've pushed her too far sometimes and other times she to me. But no matter we will always come through for each other.
She saved me from my demons, now it's time for me to return the favor, even if it takes a while. But I believe, out of anyone, she will be able to overcome anything thrown her way because that's who she it.
She's annoyingly positive, miss perfect, headstrong, insecure and easily set off, always thinking of others before herself, and never gives in (even if she gets pushed close to it).
She's a hero and I will protect that.
I hope you guys liked it, I know it's a bit cringy. I wrote this on my phone so there might be more mistakes than usual so if you notice any errors please let me know so I can fix them.